Idoless @96000challah - Tumblr Blog

The abuser doesn’t picture himself yelling, degrading her, or hurling objects at her. As he falls in love, he dreams of a happy future of conjugal bliss, just as the woman does.

So, if he isn’t laying plans to hurt her, what is going on in his mind? First, he is gazing longingly at the image he holds of the future, where the woman meets all of his needs, is beautiful and sexy at all times of the day and night, has no needs of her own, and is in awe of his brilliance and charm. He desires a woman who will cater to him and never complain about anything he does or darken his day with frustrations or unhappiness about her own life.

The abusive man doesn’t expose these self-focused fantasies to his new partner. In fact, he is largely unaware of them himself. So she has no way of knowing that he is looking more for a personal caretaker than for a partner." - Why Does he Do That

"In reality, abuse springs from a man’s early cultural training, his key male role models, and his peer influences. In other words, abuse is a problem of values, not of psychology. When someone challenges an abuser’s attitudes and beliefs, he tends to reveal the contemptuous and insulting personality that normally stays hidden, reserved for private attacks on his partner.

An abuser tries to keep everybody—his partner, his therapist, his friends and relatives—focused on how he feels, so that they won’t focus on how he thinks, perhaps because on some level he is aware that if you grasp the true nature of his problem, you will begin to escape his domination." -Why Does He Do That

#poem #poetry #love #feminism

memeuplift

asamiontop

Fucking Carl Sagan 🫶🏽

#poem #poetry

“The virtues of men are of more consequence to society than their abilities ; and for this reason, the heart should be cultivated with more assiduity than the head.” -Noah Webster

#politics

#albert camus #life coaching

“Apologizing does not always mean you're wrong and the other person is right. It just means you value your relationship more than your ego.”

― Mark Matthews

“A skateboard is the most basic ambulatory machine. It has no gears, offers no assistance. It will protect you from nothing. It is a tool for falling. For failure. But also for freedom. For living. On a skateboard you must stay balanced in a tempest of forces beyond your control. The key is to be brave, get low, stay up, and keep rolling.”—Michael Christie, All Parents Are Cowards

Time Magazine, "What We Learned About Relationships During the Pandemic"

philosophybits

“Love in action is a harsh and dreadful thing compared with love in dreams. Love in dreams is greedy for immediate action, rapidly performed and in the sight of all. Men will even give their lives if only the ordeal does not last long but is soon over, with all looking on and applauding as though on the stage. But active love is labour and fortitude…”

— Fyodor Dostoyevsky, The Brothers Karamazov

catchymemes

Anti wolf heck collar

“The purpose of the collar is to protect the dog wearing it when it has to fight the wolves. The collar base protects the dog’s throat and carotid arteries, while the spikes are intended to deter bites to the neck or even injure wolves trying to do so.”

heatandapathy

“And what do you get from serving humans that you do not get from running free?” sneered the wolf.

“Free food, unconditional love and tactical upgrades,” replied the herding dog.

castle-engineer-deactivated2019

I see your anti-wolf dogs and raise you Spanish War Dogs.

icarus-in-fl1ght-deactivated202

I see your Spanish war dogs and raise you the Tibetan Mastiff, which was actually bred to fight tigers and has fur so thick that it doesn’t need armor