a-kayla

[a-kayla]

My thoughts wonder what kind of cereal you ate this morning 

and if you saw the way the sun peaked over the mountains and spread across the sky…

My thoughts wonder what time you got up this morning and if you still dot your I’s the way you used to.

Your thoughts think about what kind of cereal you should eat this morning

—Have I always loved you more?

[a-kayla]

Even the happiest moments make me sad.

Because I can’t share them with you

[a-kayla]

Why do I crave comfort from the hands that already waved me goodbye?

[a-kayla]

In the same way perpendicular lines meet in the middle, 

we were born to come together

bound to grow apart.

In the same way perpendicular lines meet in the middle, 

our lives have been pushing us towards each other

But no matter how hard we grab on to the other, we move past our cross roads.

In the same way perpendicular lines,

you

and

me.

[a-kayla]

I need to tell you how much I’m breaking inside.

How badly I’m falling apart at my seams

I can’t keep myself together much longer,

but I don’t have the strength to scream

I’m seeping out silently.

—I call you

I need to tell you how much I’m breaking inside,

but we talked bout your cat instead.

[a-kayla]

You claim to know me 

but did you know i used to cry on your floor

right in front of you?

You were so loud,

you didn’t hear the sound of a single tear drop.

[a-kayla]

I gave you an invitation into my life

and you didn’t show up to the party.

I don’t know how else to say it,

but I guess you had better plans.

[a-kayla]

I wonder why rejection hurts so bad, 

but then I realize 

I gave them an invitation into my life

and they didn’t show up to the party

I don’t know how else to say it,

but I guess they had better plans.

[a-kayla]

Rejection makes me feel like I’m not good enough

I gave you an invitation into my life

and you don’t show up to the party.

I don’t know how else to say it

but I guess you had better plans.

[a-kayla]

I remember your hugs and your warm embrace

now just memories

as my only choice

is to search for you in a stranger’s face.

[a-kayla]

It’s hard to recognize myself as someone I’ve never been

[a-kayla]

the space between us is fragile,

I wish to run into your arms,

but all I can do is watch the bridge that connects us 

fall apart.