para | love mends the pain
jayy-brown:
Jay was so lost in his own train of thought that he didnât even hear the keys in the door or see the door swinging wide open, so when the door slammed shut, it was safe to say he was a little startled himself. He definitely wasnât expecting the sight of his blonde ex girlfriend standing before him, frankly looking as if sheâd been dragged to hell and back overnight. âIâm - Iâm sorry,â he stuttered an apology, jumping to his feet. He was going to question what she was doing home - considering it was barely even 6am and she definitely did not look like she should be on her feet never mind out of hospital  - but she beat him to it. As if he needed any more confirmation that she was far from okay, she started rambling like a lunatic. Jay would happily admit that he didnât know much about anything, but he damn well knew Abi Branning. He knew when she was happy, when she was sad, and everything in between. He could read her like a book and heâd already figured out that something was very, very, wrong. She couldnât sleep, she said. He remained silent as he watched her pour herself a glass of water, feeling that sickening gut instinct worsen at the sight of her avoiding his eye contact. Jay wasnât stupid, especially not when it came to her. Considering the circumstances, he dreaded to think what had her so shaken up. She would have stayed in the hospital if it was just her injuries, and if she was injured that badly, they wouldnât have allowed her to come out.Â
âItâs okay,â he replied, gently. He didnât want to pressurise her or upset her, so he made the quick decision to try and get her to relax instead of questioning what was wrong. âWhy donât you come sit down?â He suggested hesitantly. He knew how easy it was for Abi to snap at the slightest thing when she was angry or upset, and he wasnât sure which Abi he would get if he came across as patronising or abrupt with her. However, he had one question he had to ask first. âHow come theyâve discharged you then? At this time of day?â He asked, sitting down on the sofa again. He of course wanted to ask about the fire, and how Steven and Jane were doing. He wondered where Max or Lauren were, but he decided all of those questions could wait. She would open up if she wanted to.Â
The blonde let her hazel hues scan over briefly to the older man who was once her boyfriend and the look of worry that surfaced on his features when he seen her, and how he rushed to his feet. She felt her entire being flood with an indescribable feeling, maybe it was relief at seeing someone who could be there for her, or fright at having to face the reality of the events that had just gone down. Abi knew that the latter was something she desperately didnât want, because to be frank, she didnât know how to deal with it, without going insane. The insanity had already struck when she began rambling, it had struck back in the hospital when she could hear Stevenâs words on a continuous loop like some sick kind of torture, build to add salt to already painful wounds. Nothing could change the last few hours or erase it from her mind, which was why she was falling apart inside. There was absolutely nowhere to run. At his apology, she gave a wave of her hand, dismissing it, in a way that showed there was no need for it in the first place, besides, it wasnât like he had expected her to walk through the door at the crack of dawn in the mess she was in. Her hand shook as she held the glass of water as if her life depended on it, afraid sheâd drop it and it would shatter just like everything already had around her. Her nerves were shot, her mind a mess, everything was completely ruined.Â
At his suggestion, she looked in his direction, still avoiding eye contact and let her mind run over whether or not she was ready to speak, or to be within human contact without breaking down. Before she could give herself a chance to over think it, she walked over, a little shaky at first, holding onto the side of the couch, she sat and put her glass on the table in front. Had it been Ben who had offered, the answer would have been a simple no. There was still distrust there, lurking deep down, and she didnât feel like opening up to her former best friend. âI... I canât stay up long. Need to get a few hours.â She tried to make some lame excuse, even though she knew it was because in moments sheâd be spilling everything to Jay, nausea washed over her, and she brought the back of her hand to her mouth for a moment, hoping it would pass. Not only was it pregnancy at itâs finest, it was the whole memory of seeing someone she cared about slip away before her eyes. When he asked the question she had expected, her head lifted, and her eyes met his and for a moment, tears collected over hazel orbs and she found herself at a loss of words. âI-I...I couldnât sleep after what had happened. I just kept seeing it all again and again. And... And-...â Lifting her hand, she wiped a tear that had spilled down her cheeks, her voice becoming all thick as the emotions made their way out of her in a less than orderly fashion. There was only one way sheâd snap. Either through sadness or anger. Despite her attitude these days, she still had a heart. âIt was just a reminder. They said we were okay.â At her last words, she looked down and realized what sheâd said, mentally scolding herself. âI mean, they said I was okay so-... So I just wanted to get out of there, and I signed myself out after they had a doctor check on me.â She fiddled with her hands, trying her best to divert attention from her face with all her might. âI couldnât be there, Jay. I just couldnât. Stevenâs dead. He died last night. I didnât wanna be there after that.âÂ