No title available
Xuebing Du
AnasAbdin
blake kathryn
tumblr dot com
PR's Tumblrdome
Game of Thrones Daily
Not today Justin
pixel skylines
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
titsay
Show & Tell
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Sade Olutola
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
JBB: An Artblog!
#extradirty
⁂
Kiana Khansmith
DEAR READER
seen from Romania
seen from Poland
seen from Malaysia
seen from Türkiye
seen from Algeria
seen from South Africa
seen from Algeria
seen from Pakistan
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from New Zealand
seen from United States
seen from Algeria
@absolutely-adoerable-blog
ooc: I know this place has been completely dead for well over a month (which is as much my fault as anyone else's), but I was feeling nostalgic/lonely/etc and decided to leave something here in case anyone else is like me and has been popping in at random. I've been missing rping as of late, but I haven't seen anything that lives up to what this group was.
OOC: Sorry for my absence, guys. However the dissertation is done and I can now devote my life to roleplay (which is exactly what I’m going to do because I have nothing else to do for the time being.) But this dash is a ghost town.
CONGRATULATIONS! And I eagerly await your reply =)
Doe and Remus || Waiting
The emphasis on her last word did not go unnoticed by Remus. It just so happened that he knew exactly what had happened since the party, even if it hadn’t been said in words. Nothing went unnoticed when you shared a dorm with others. That much had been proved when James, Sirius and Pete had originally approached him about his secret, being a werewolf. That didn’t escape their notice despite Remus’ pained efforts. Besides, what did James and Sirius have to hide? There was no shame in them living their lives and making the most of the moment. The same could not be said for him. Remus would never have forgiven himself had he let himself be caught up in the heat of the moment. He had to be careful. He’d only hurt someone like Doe, who was fragile despite her ferocity simply because he was a werewolf and she was not.
Remus had to rein in his curiosity however. What he didn’t know was that Dorcas might not wish to see Sirius. That they weren’t on good terms was completely unknown to him. He supposed it explained Sirius’ particularly foul mood but in all honesty any number of things could have triggered that. It was hardly unusual. Remus’ eyes trailed her movements as she rose to her feet, the slight twinge of annoyance as he said her full name, although it shouldn’t have annoyed her. It was an intimacy he denied most, the only exception being the Marauders. He felt even more compelled to keep his distance in light of how frustrated the fact that she and Sirius had been together, and that she and James had kissed, had made him. He didn’t want to feel anything, let alone that.
“Really?” he asked, not entirely certain he wished to delve into this area of discussion. “I’d have assumed I’d only be a disappointment. So you weren’t waiting for a certain raven-haired Casanova?” The comparison was annoyingly accurate. Sirius had a way with girls, a way with Dorcas, that Remus would never have. He didn’t envy him; he wasn’t jealous, merely mournful. They had a chance at a life which Remus was beginning to realise that he couldn’t have.
Remus’ expression hardened slightly at the thought, but he forced another smile to his lips and this time it was more genuine. In the end of the day, as embittered as he was around the full moon, he owed his friends a hell of a lot. That included Dorcas, for simply putting up with him every time he said her full name aloud.
“What happened?” he asked, straining his voice so as to keep himself from putting it bluntly. Sirius was one of his best friends, but he could be a right arse at times and even had a habit of hurting others without even knowing it. Sirius had hurt Remus when he’d unknowingly told Severus Snape how to get to the Shrieking Shack on the night of the full moon. Remus hadn’t been able to look the Slytherin in the eye since.
The last thing Dory felt like right then was smiling, but she felt that familiar and automatic pull at the corners of her lips as a smile appeared on Remus' face. She only let it grace her features very briefly, and then she fought to keep it away. Either Sirius hadn't yet told Remus what had happened, or the other boy was playing dumb. There could have been any number of reasons for Remus to be playing dumb. Perhaps Sirius had told the story in such a way as to omit his involvement in what had happened. In that case, Remus might not be interested at all in what Doe had to say. He and Sirius were closer friends than Doe was to any of them. They were also fiercely loyal - any moron could see that. No way would they take her side against another in the group. Perhaps he was playing dumb because he wasn't interested in any of the stupid drama going on around him. So she and Sirius had been in a spat, so what? It happened all the time between multitudes of people in the castle. This was nothing new and was about as interesting as one of Binns' lectures on golblin revolts. Or, perhaps Remus just didn't want to get in the middle. Perhaps he didn't want to have to pick a side.
The thought almost brought laughter from Dory. She and Remus weren't that good of mates. He wouldn't care about losing her friendship. Hell, he didn't even seem upset that they hadn't spoken or spent time together since the incident by the lake.
The realization that he really wouldn't care about the outcome or its effect on Doe made the fight against a smile much easier. Even the annoyance she had begun to feel at the mention of Sirius ebbed, only to be replaced by a feeling of loneliness. She should have just gone to her dormitory and stayed there. Or maybe she should have just said a simple 'hello' to Remus and let him pass with nothing more said. She could have continued to wait until Lily appeared. Lily, at least, accepted Doe's friendship. She wouldn't pick a side, and if she did, most likely it would be Dory's. She would listen to Dory and maybe even offer advice. Then again, maybe Doe really should have just stuck around her dormitory. She could have found a book to read. Maybe she could instead find an empty classroom and deal with her agitation in other ways. Maybe people were the last thing she needed to be dealing with right then.
"Casanova, right," she scoffed bitterly, her eyes rolling once. She really wanted to utter names and insults, but had a feeling his friend wouldn't appreciate hearing them. "I might have been waiting for him, but now that I think about it, it would be a terrible idea to see him right now."
She pulled her bag to the front of her and fumbled with it slightly, finally reaching a hand inside and tugging on a piece of fabric. It grudgingly emerged from her bag, attempting to bring ink bottles and quills with it. Everything about that git was just disagreeable with her that day, wasn't it? She folded it in half quickly and then held it out for Remus to take.
"Anyway, as long as we're on the subject of that" git "er, him.... Would you be so kind as to return this jumper to him? The" idiot "I mean, he, managed to leave it behind the other day when we were... studying in the library."
I have been spending so much time with girls lately I’m starting to smell like them. I need some dude time.
I mean, I get that I’m a ladies’ man, but goddammit I am a James man above all else! Where’s my lover best friend gotten to nowadays?
Take it down a notch, Black. You're not as great with the birds as you think you are.
Doe and Remus || Waiting
Remus had been keeping to himself lately. This tended to happen around the full moon; he grew more reserved than his usual self, turning to the comfortable confines of the library for long hours, more than he might otherwise. It was easier that way. The pain of transformation wasn’t sudden; it was a feeling which crept beneath the skin in drawn out reminders of what he was and just how different he was from his fellow students. It was easier to simply put his head down and study rather than burden his friends with his ill manner. But he suspected this wasn’t the only reason why he hadn’t asked Sirius, James or Pete if they wanted to go to the library with him that afternoon. Normally he would. Normally he’d advise they get some work done before the week was through, but not this time.
Remus gathered up his things, his various books, parchment, a quill and ink, stuffing them into his bag almost carelessly before making his way down the steps of his dorm and through the common room. It was easy to avoid his fellow Gryffindors. There was a reason he hung around the likes of James Potter and Sirius Black, not only because they happened to be the best mates he could ever hope for, but back in his first year they were safe. Remus didn’t necessarily blend in alongside them, but he didn’t have to. The mere association meant he crossed the common room without being approached. Anyone who might possibly be compelled to speak to him was either a Marauder, thus not there, or with his fellow Marauders. It was a cruel truth, but Remus was more than used to it.
The same could not be said about Dorcas. The portrait swung open, and Remus scrambled out of the portrait hole, his eyes instantly falling on Dorcas, currently sat upon the cold ground as if waiting for something. Someone, most likely, and by that he meant Sirius. It was no secret what they’d been up to, at least not the gist of it. It didn’t take someone telling him for Remus to work it out. Word got around at Hogwarts, given how it was full of students eager to gossip and the castle was fairly small considering. Besides, Remus was observant, sometimes too much so for his own good. He couldn’t fathom why it had caused him to feel a nagging sense of annoyance, but it did and so he avoided it at all costs. He avoided them at all costs. And so a while had passed since that afternoon spent with Dorcas by the lake. Only now, avoiding Dorcas was no longer an option.
“Dorcas,” he said, a smile making its way to his lips but there was an element of control about it; it was forced. And despite prior warnings, Remus continued to address her by her full name. It was either that, or Meadowes, for anything else would have been too affectionate, too intimate even, for the boy who strove to keep a distance. The day he allowed such to slip from his lips was the day he believed he wasn’t defined by his condition. Stuffing his hands in his pockets, his eyes flicked to the drum of her fingers. She was just as restless as Sirius. In fact, he could see why they were together. At least he hoped that’s what they were, for if it was anything less than Remus suspected the sting would only be more piercing. Releasing a sigh of resignation, Remus shoved these less savoury thoughts to the back of his mind for the time being.
“Our team kicked your arse in quidditch last year, an embarrassing defeat, but Ravenclaw must have some redeeming qualities. So what brings you to Gryffindor Tower?”
Doe was pulled from her musings and the music in her head as the portrait finally swung open. She had originally intended to see that blasted arse, but Doe could feel her heart swell in relief as a different (and usually more agreeable) Marauder stepped into the corridor. Remus. Doe had barely seen him since the incident by the lake. She hadn't seen him at all at the party, and since then she had been, not exactly avoiding him, but not really making an effort to greet him or spend time with him. She knew that James and Sirius had told him of what transpired at that stupid party in the pitch. She also knew that she had been avoiding thinking about it.
Every time Dorcas' mind wandered to that night or her conversation with James shortly after, she felt an odd pull in her stomach. It wasn't the nice butterflies she got when she and Sirius were together. It was an almost nauseating lurch. She was ashamed, but why? Hadn't she always told herself that life was too short for regrets? These days, life really was short. She had just read in the paper about another muggle family being found dead in their home, the Dark Mark set above their house. It made her wonder if this was really the time to be fighting so bitterly with friends, or letting shame and regrets get in the way of furthering other friendships.
But if there was one thing about Doe, she was stubborn. Not as stubborn as some of her friends, but certainly still strong-willed. She knew that what had happened earlier that day between her and Sirius had been largely her fault. She'd been annoyed, in a bad mood, and had taken it out on him. On the other hand, she thought, as a white-hot flash of anger shot through her again, he didn't have to yell at her the way he had. He hadn't needed to insult her like he had. After all, she hadn't insulted him at all! She'd just told him to stop eating off her plate. He was the one bringing up the cupboard, and insulting her, and comparing her to some cow. Asshole.
Doe got to her feet as the other Marauder addressed her, always by her full name. Always. The day that changed, she would probably have to give him a party. A "congratulations on getting that stick out of your arse" party. It was a shame that the two of them couldn't just be friends. It was a shame that they couldn't ever just sit and chat like she did with the rest of her mates. It was a shame that there was this odd barrier between them at all times. Doe honestly wasn't sure why she cared so much. There were other people in the castle with whom she had a strained relationship, sure, but it never bothered her quite like it did with Remus. After all, she wasn't particularly close with Peter and didn't really mind. It was all rather odd.
The blonde glanced up at him, a small smile meeting his. She didn't miss the way it didn't extend to his eyes. It was just a friendly gesture. The way a polite person would greet someone with whom they were on amicable terms. Nothing more.
"Remus, you should know better than to bring up Quidditch around me," she said, adjusting the strap of her bag. "And actually, I'm really glad that I ran into you."
Great Hall || Sirius and Doe
Sirius grabbed the edge of the stall wall, leaning over and awkwardly throwing his arm over the side to point at her angrily.
“Then stop being even more pissy when I actually stick up for myself in the face of your stupid anger!” he said, his eyes flashing. Sirius licked his lips, his brow furrowed. Doe wasn’t making sense. She just wasn’t. Maybe Sirius should just be gay. Become a religious pipe smoker and read newspapers and— no, boobs were too good to give up.
“Maybe you shouldn’t have been standing so close to the door; I wasn’t suggesting you’re on the rag I was comparing your irrational mood swing to a fat bird on the rag; and no I wasn’t, because I like fucking you, having sex with you, whatever you want to call it, I’m just starting to think that you don’t like it because you storm out of there like a cat confronted with water and now you’re biting my fucking head off for being muddy after Quidditch practice!” Sirius released the wall, turning his head back into the water and shaking it so water splattered around him, splaying out. So much for long, hot, relaxing shower.
“Maybe,” he continued, reaching for some soap and cursing under his breath when he realised he’d left his shampoo on the other side of the room. He was not getting out of the shower to get it. His hair would have to manage without. “If you stopped yelling at me for five minutes you’d realise that I don’t want to fight because I don’t want to lose my temper. Or do you not remember what happens when I do?”
Just saying that made Sirius’ stomach lurch and he paused in washing himself for a moment, eyes closed as a sickening nausea washed over him. He knew he was nowhere near that angry, but he still didn’t want to be such a short fuse. He looked up and glared daggers at Doe, throwing down the soap and washing off the suds before grabbing his towel and wrapping it around his waist and stepping out in front of her again, hands clenched at his sides.
“Sorry for whatever the fuck I did that got your royal panties in a twist— oh wait,” Sirius brought a hand to his mouth, as if he’d just remembered something. “Are you even wearing any?”
"I-"
But then he cut her off, continuing to rant. He just didn't get it! He hadn't listened to a word that Dorcas had said, not one! Not a single one! He didn't understand what it was that had annoyed her, nor did he understand how he had made it worse when he had began insinuating that all women, when angered, were "PMSing". Of course he hadn't said that she was, but comparing her to a woman who was, implied that female anger only ever occurred when certain hormones were more unbalanced than otherwise. It was a terrible implication. Old-fashioned, and misogynistic, and archaic, and she wouldn't stand for it.
"Well-"
But then he was cutting her off again, which was part of the reason why she had followed him in here in the first place! He kept storming off to prevent her from getting a word in, and now he was just going on and on without pause! Hot anger bubbled through her. She felt overheated and shaking, though certainly not a weak, scared shaking. More like the kind of shaking when you knew that you had to react at a moment's notice. It was the fight-or-flight and she was ready to fight.
"...I don’t want to fight because I don’t want to lose my temper. Or do you not remember what happens when I do?"
A quick jolt shot through Doe, making her freeze as she was dragged back to that day several weeks ago. A cold shame began to trickle through her, and her head fell a fraction of an inch. What the hell were they even fighting about? Sure, she had been cranky because of a lack of sleep and from being bitched out by that fucking librarian. Sure, he had been annoying her. But why the fuck were they screaming at each other like this? Why did he keep bringing up the way she had left the cupboard against her? So what if she left?! They had class to get to! She at least said goodbye! What the fuck did he want from her? One minute he was going on and on about how they weren't dating (which they definitely weren't!) and then he was being all soft and gentle and acting like he'd had his feelings hurt. There weren't supposed to be any feelings!
"...Are you even wearing any?”
Another jolt. Not of shock, though. Anger. Rage. Wrath. Everything that had ever made her angry. Everything that had ever made her want to scream.
Dorcas Meadowes had a very interesting personality quirk. Most of the times she cried, it was not because she was sad. It was not because she had suffered some great disappointment. Doe Meadowes didn't really cry the way most people did. She blamed it on being forced to always keep her emotions at bay when she was at home. She was always being told that above all else, she must not let her emotions control her. Doe must always keep herself calm on the surface. She had to be quiet, collected, and polite.
So for Doe Meadowes to cry, with the exception of the event in the aforementioned cupboard a few weeks prior, she had to be really fucking angry.
Dorcas' eyes met Sirius' in a hard glare as hot tears began falling down her face.
"Go to hell," she whispered, immediately turning on her heel and beginning to storm to the exit before she could do something she would regret. Like slapping him. Or driving her knee into his groin as hard as she possibly could. God damn, that last one was so tempting...
Great Hall || Sirius and Doe
Sirius threw his arms up in frustration. Even in the bathroom he couldn’t get peace to just cool down so he wouldn’t flip out again. Though he was far from it, if she just kept talking he’d lose it pretty fast.
“What am I doing now then? Going along with another crazy sex thing or trying to shower?” He turned his back on her, stepping out of his trousers and boxers. Momentarily embarrassed at being butt naked with Doe right behind him, Sirius shook himself mentally. She’d seen him naked before. That was probably what had started all of this. He scowled and stomped into a stall, turning on the shower so hot it burned him. He hissed and stuck his head under the water scrubbing at his eyes angrily.
“Go on then, why have you followed me into the boys’ bathroom and stopped be from cleaning up that dreadful mud you despise so?” he asked, glaring over the edge of the stall at her. It was only chest high on him, the door non-existent. Sirius hated these bathrooms, but most people never even came in here. Most people used the ones with proper stalls, or prefects bathrooms, or head boy and girl bathrooms. Sirius couldn’t even remember why his shit was stored here for after practice in the first place.
Doe stared at his shoulders as he finished undressing, determined to not get flustered by the fact that he just continued stripping in front of her. It wasn't like she hadn't seen him naked before, after all, but there was a time and place for everything. In fact, it was pretty fucking rude of him to just turn his back on her like that and to not even give her the basic respect of a face-to-face argument. The fact that he deemed her less important than his fucking shower didn't really help her feel any better. Not at all. That damn, spoilt, utter arse!
"No, stop trying to storm away without letting me get a word in edge-wise!" she shouted, not caring what kind of ruckus she caused. She was going to speak her mind, one way or another.
"First of all, I never said you couldn't snap at me or get angry or anything! You were the one who wouldn't let me fight back by constantly running away! For another thing, what the hell was with slamming the door in my face! You could have broken my nose or something! Also, what the fuck was that PMS statement?! Why is it that when a woman is displeased, it automatically means "on the rag"? A-and what the hell do you mean by "crazy sex thing"?! Last time I checked, you weren't exactly begging me to stop!"
Doe was breathing heavy by now, her cheeks burning from chasing him seemingly all over the castle and just from the sheer indignity of what he was doing. She was probably nearly as much of a mess as he was right then.
Great Hall || Sirius and Doe
Sirius yanked his arm from her grip without even looking at her, lengthening his stride and turning corners sharply until he reached the boy’s bathroom. He was just glad he’d been in there earlier with James to store their stuff.
“Oh, so I’m not allowed to snap back at you when you start a fight, but you get to be an irrational dickhead for no reason at all?” he snorted and pushed open the door, holding it open just long enough to glare at Doe some more and add one more thing.
“Get over yourself, Doe. You know I’d say that to anyone if they were acting like a little bitch.” Sirius let go of the door, letting it slam in Doe’s face. What the fuck was her deal? Angrily, he tugged his shirt over his head, throwing it to the floor and kicking his shoes off. A shower would calm him down. That was all he needed. A nice, long, hot shower, and then hanging out with Peter and teasing him to hell and back would get him back to normal in no time. Not that he’d been not normal. Doe was the one being weird.
It was absurd. No matter how many he flirted or got off with, Sirius just didn’t understand girls. One second they’re meeting you after class without any underwear and fucking you in a broom cupboard, the next they’re acting like a rabid dog whose bone was just snatched from under it’s nose. Stupid. Ridiculous. Obscene. Sirius mumbled incoherently under his breath, something about tarts and their tricks, as he angrily flicked open the button of his trousers.
Doe puffed herself, up, just waiting for him to shut that goddamned trap of his long enough for her to get a word in edgewise. She was being irrational?! She wasn't the one immediately losing her cool (well, not at first)! She wasn't the one shoving fifth years (just pushing past them)! She wasn't the one uttering the foulest of insults only to then storm away so that the other person couldn't even rebut whatever it was that had been said! She wasn't the one being a complete fucking arse!
But instead of an opportunity to set him straight, she got a door in the face.
"I - why you - Sirius Black!" she yelled, pushing the door open for herself. He would not get away that easy. She was going to speak her mind, one way or another and he would fucking listen, even if she had to tie him down and shove a rag down his fucking throat.
She didn't even care that she had just walked into a men's bathroom. All she cared about was that he would not just storm off from her or slam a door in her face. God damn it, he was infuriating!
"Will you for once stop that?!" she demanded hotly, throwing her bag to the ground and storming up to him again.
Great Hall || Sirius and Doe
Sirius’ eyes flashed and he shook his head, stepping forwards so he could hiss at Doe. He didn’t like the idea that everyone else could hear what was being said. It was their private business for Merlin’s sake, whatever was happening.
“I’m acting like an arse? You’re the one who’s acting like a fat woman PMSing without her chocolate! I wasn’t flicking that mud anywhere near you,” he said lowly, pushing down most of his anger. After weeks of anger and worry and negative emotions, finally having his feelings under control again was heavenly. He wasn’t about to let go of that.
“And I was trying to be a gentleman,” he continued, his voice raised a little. Not enough so that the whole Great Hall could hear him, but just so his point would come across. “You know, like I was rais—” he stopped and stepped back, clearing his throat and turning his eyes to Doe’s icily.
“Like I was raised,” he finished, his voice firm. He wasn’t going to deal with her right now. Doe was unreasonable, bitchy, and he couldn’t give a hoot. Without saying anything else, Sirius turned on his heel and stamped away, shoving a group of fifth years aside a little roughly. People were staring, probably. Sirius didn’t care. He wanted to run, but he didn’t have enough time until he had to meet Peter. Hell if Doe’s ridiculous outburst was going to stop him showering right now, though.
Doe inhaled sharply at his insult. How dare he! Why the fuck was it that whenever a woman was angry, it was "that time of the month"? God damn it, she would make him pay for this. As much as she hated double standards, she hated stereotypes. She hated sexism. She wanted nothing more than to join some of the feminist protests she'd heard of happening in the muggle world. Hell, the wizarding world needed them just as much as their muggle counterparts! Women were still expected to become assistant healers. They were still expected to become secretaries to the more senior ministry officials. They were expected to marry and pop out little wizards and witches.
Dorcas said no to that bullshit. Absolutely not. She would never let herself be outdone by a man, no matter who it was or what the situation was. She would not let such a sexist, misogynistic insult pass by her without consequence. She was going to stand her ground, even if it was Sirius. Even if they had been friends since... well, seemingly since they entered the castle together.
Doe picked up her back and stormed after him, pushing past the still recovering fifth years and possibly knocking one over. Whatever. They'd deal with it. She followed him out of the Great Hall and into the corridor, still fuming. Finally, she was forced to run after him (bloody hell, she hated being short) so that she could grab him by the arm.
"Hey! What the bloody fuck was all that? You don't get to just storm away after saying all of that to me!" she snapped rather loudly.
Great Hall || Sirius and Doe
Sirius scowled and drummed his fingers impatiently on the table top. This was uncalled for! He knew Doe was a bitch, but he never expected her to just be snippy and a jerk without good reason. She had logic, dammit! And Sirius not bothering to use the manners that had been conditioned into his lifestyle as a young boy was not a good excuse to be mean.
“Yeah,” he said coldly, not believing her. “That’s why you ran out of there so fast and - oh, what a surprise! - are being so snappy with me two days later just because I’m acting normal. You know, because there is no reason to not be normal.” Sirius snatched up a Quidditch glove that had fallen out of his pocket earlier without his notice and stood up, stuffing it back into his trousers and glaring sightly down at Doe.
“If you’re having second thoughts about us fooling around you could have just told me. It’s not like we’re dating, no need to be a bitch for fuck’s sake.” Sirius dug around in his pocket a little, wondering if he’d left a packet of cigarettes in this pair of trousers last time he’d had practice. Apparently not.
Doe dropped her fork with a loud clang and then took several quick gulps of water before slamming the cup down on the table. Her hands shot out, banging on the table and she stood up as well, glaring at him. She didn't care how much noise she made. Damn it, she would make as much noise as she fucking wanted. She would scream at him at the top of her lungs if she wanted. If he wanted to make a goddamned scene, then that was exactly what he was going to get. He would get the biggest bloody scene ever and would never live it down.
Truth be told, Doe wasn't even sure anymore why she was angry. Yes, he'd been acting terribly, yes, he had made her feel uncomfortable with his actions in the cupboard, but that was no reason for her to bite his head off like that. However, Doe was easily swayed by others. Just like a smile on someone's face would make her smile, an insult or yelling from someone would make her insult them back or make her want to yell louder.
"You're acting like an arse, that's what you're acting like! Normal people don't just flick dirt all over the place when others are trying to eat! And if you want to talk about us not dating, which will never happen, then what the hell was with all that fluffy shit afterwards, huh?!" she demanded, meeting his narrowed eyes with her own glare.
Great Hall || Sirius and Doe
Sirius withdrew his arm, inching away from her a little and swinging one leg over the bench so he was straddling it.
“What’s your problem, Doe?” he demanded. He didn’t get it. She’d looked fine a second ago. He was just acting like they normally did: flirty and easy. It peeved him off that Doe was suddenly so snippy and distant. Brow pulled down, Sirius leaned forwards slightly, one arm resting on the table while the other rested on his lap.
“Is this about the other day, in the broom cupboard?” he asked, his voice low. He didn’t try to hide his confusion, or his dislike of being snapped at. So far, Doe had no good reason to be pissed at him, and he wasn’t going to accept her bitchiness unless she had a bloody good excuse.
Doe took another bite, even though what she really wanted to do was just push it away and leave. Emotions or no, she was still hungry and studying was next to impossible when she was hungry. In fact, the hungrier she was, the more likely she was to snap at people and to pick fights. Which, apparently, was already happening. Except that he'd started it! He was the one being all soft, and endearing when it wasn't appropriate! They were just friends! There was no reason for him to brush her hair, or kiss her forehead, or suddenly give her feather-light kisses on the lips when she didn't what that! There wasn't supposed to be any emotions between them, and suddenly, he was throwing them in whenever he wanted.
But then the second she showed any emotion, specifically annoyance, it wasn't allowed! What the bloody hell? She hated such injustices. She couldn't find out anything from one person, even though they knew everything about her. She couldn't fall asleep on her own textbooks, even though they were her own bloody books that had been already bought and paid for. She couldn't be a little annoyed, even though other people were allowed to rage and destroy a broom cupboard with little or no explanation as to why they had done that.
Doe really, really hated double standards, and hypocrisy, and injustices. Especially when they were aimed at her.
"I don't have a problem, and the cupboard has nothing to do with this. Nothing happened there. I simply have issue with your manners," she said coldly in between a few more bites from her plate.
Great Hall || Sirius and Doe
Sirius turned his face to her slightly, a grin lighting up his features as if she’d just told him he was the most handsome man she had ever laid eyes on and wanted to take him right then and there.
“Good, because you didn’t really have a choice.” Picking at some dry, flaking mud on his Gryffindor shirt, Sirius raised his eyebrows at Doe. He wanted her to tell him what she had been thinking in the broom cupboard before she bolted, but he had no way to ask her. Except for, apparently, raising his eyebrows ever so slightly while he flicked dry mud all over the floor.
With a small, sudden jerk, Sirius swung around so his legs were under the table, knee brushing against Doe’s as he stole a clean fork and pinched a little of her food. He may have eaten several plates back at the Gryffindor table, but he wanted something to do with his mouth, and Doe didn’t seem very talkative (why didn’t she just tell him what was going through her head already?) and snogging her wasn’t an option (since she was eating and they were smack bang in the middle of the Great Hall, surrounded by other students). Waving his fork around, Sirius grinned through his mouthful of Doe’s food and then dropped the cutlery on the table.
“Yum.”
Ah, there it was. That was more like the Sirius to which she was accustomed. The one who would just walk right up to you and announce that you were now going to hang out with him. The one who just walked up to you in a hallway and began snogging you senseless, without even a simple "hello" or "hi Doe, how's it going?". The one who apparently deemed the lunch table an appropriate place to pull bits of dried mud off of himself. She scowled at him, trying her best to just get back to her meal and to ignore the disgusting display sitting right beside her. If he noticed the sour look on her face, though, he didn't say anything.
Except that it was right then that a flash of a fork caught her attention. Sirius clearly hadn't noticed her expression, as he was too busy eating right off her plate.
Typical.
"Sirius Black, didn't you ever learn that it was rude to eat off someone else' plate?" she snapped, smacking him lightly on her arm. "Honestly, if all you're going to do is pick mud off of yourself and steal my food, you might as well have stayed over at your own table."
Great Hall || Sirius and Doe
Sirius barely batted an eyelid, taking one hand out of his pocket and scratching his nose, then brushing his curling hair from his eyes.
“Mind if I join you?” he asked even as he sat next to her, elbows resting on the table behind him. He was too lazy to swivel around, and this was more of a temporary seat, anyway. Sirius watched Doe carefully. She looked tired, and a little stiff. He couldn’t help but let his eyes wonder to her mouth for a moment before he looked up and away, straight ahead but keeping her in his peripheral vision.
Doe paused in mid bite to raise an eyebrow at his question. Since when did Sirius Black ask permission to take a seat by someone else? He seemed to be acting a bit... a bit odd, truth be told. He wasn't turned to face her, he wasn't even looking at her, except possibly out of the corner of his eye. She wasn't quite sure why he would be acting so aloof, though. Had she said something in one of their classes? Was it because they hadn't spent time together since the incident with the broom cupboard?
No, it couldn't have been anything that she had done. Surely things just hadn't gone well in Quidditch practice. No wonder she was mostly glad to have quit - it really made someone far too touchy. Well, it made Doe too touchy and she liked to think that she was just like everyone else. Then again, not everyone else would have purposefully broken his or her broom. Well, you win some, you lose some. Of course, Sirius' temper was just as bad her her own, if not more so. Doe forced herself to not think about that one afternoon, the way he had just flown into such a terrifying rage. The way he had just smashed his fist into the wall like it was nothing. The way she'd been reduced to tears of fright - terrified that any moment that anger could have been directed towards her...
"Of course not," she said, lifting her fork the rest of the way to her mouth. To the world, seemingly no time had passed. Doe's pause had been so slight, she might have simply paused to make the face at him.
Great Hall || Sirius and Doe
Finally finishing the gross amount of food he’s set out to eat when he’d sat down for lunch, Sirius flicked at his fingers, sending crumbs flying over to the other end of the table. A sixth year protested loudly, but Sirius ignored him, spinning on the bench and scanning the room briefly as he stood. Hardly anyone was left seated and eating, but ah, was that a head of long blonde hair over there? With a small grin, Sirius made his way over to the Ravenclaw table, ready to ask Doe what had been the matter the other day when she’d bolted like a cat on fire.
“Dorcas,” he said when he was close enough, his hands dug deep into the pockets of his trousers. He was aware that he was muddy and sweaty and in his practice Quidditch kit, but he wasn’t so dim not to know that Doe had been thinking something serious as she’d left. It troubled him a little.
“You’re a little late for lunch aren’t you?”
Doe had just finished spooning a small amount of the dish onto her plate when a familiar male voice got her attention, making her jump slightly in her seat. Damn, he was there, and he'd seen her. He'd also deemed it a good idea to come over and strike up a conversation with her. Well, she could handle that. He wasn't unreasonable. They could talk while she ate and then go their separate ways, her so she could study, him so he could... apparently bathe.
While she had been working her fingers to the bone in the library, he had been out in the quidditch pitch. She was jealous. She missed Quidditch, quite a lot in fact. Once again, Doe found herself cursing that arse-of-a-captain. The blame really rested with her, of course, for losing her temper, but it was so much easier to blame someone else. Not that Doe didn't ever admit to acting rashly, or to being the cause of some of her own misfortune. She readily accepted the consequences of her actions. But whenever there was another party involved, she liked to put some of it on his or her shoulders. Likely she would have to cut down on that, but it could wait another day.
"Black," she said to his greeting. She hated being called Dorcas he he damned well knew it by now. It was only appropriate that she call him by a name he detested as well.
"I was busy. Lost track of time," she said, picking up her fork and glancing over at him from the corner of her eye.
Great Hall || Sirius and Doe
Sirius was one of the last people sitting at the Gryffindor table. Where James had gone to shower straight after he’d finished eating and Remus and Peter were… somewhere else (Sirius didn’t know where), he’d come straight from Quidditch practice, still muddy and sweaty and as starving as a man who hadn’t eaten for a week.
Shoving yet another ham sandwich into his mouth, Sirius chewed thoughtfully. His brow lowered, his fingers drumming against the soft bread in his hand as small flashes of two very different girls ran through his mind. First: Mary. He liked her, didn’t he? He thought he did. Every time they passed in the hallway he would stick out his hand for a second and purposefully brush it against hers, then not look back when she surely was. Which was probably a dick move, but he wasn’t good with feelings. For all she knew it was always an accident, and Sirius never corrected her. Hadn’t even spoken to her since their in the hall after hours…
And then there was Doe. She’d run out so fast the other day after their little (‘little’ being completely the wrong word for it) meeting in the cupboard, he was worried. She’d looked worried, he thought. Or was it confused? He’d been distracted by the fact one second she was there and the next gone. Plus, his trousers had been undone. That can cause a draft, and Sirius hated being cold. It was a little off-putting.
Stuffing the rest of the sandwich into his mouth, Sirius took a large drink of pumpkin juice and leant back on the bench a little, not even waiting to swallow before piling more crisps and cakes and chocolate onto his plate.
Doe walked through the corridors of the castle, rubbing one of her eyes lazily. She'd dozed off in the library again and had received a very, very stern lecture from that batty matron about the virtues of not drooling on the books. Okay, more like she'd been screamed at by the old hag for having drooled a little on her own textbook! Not one of the books of the library's, her own. But that made no difference at all to that crazy old woman. Doe hadn't even been able to explain or hold her ground. She'd been more or less forcibly removed from the library would now have to try to finish her homework in the common room. Not that it was so terrible of a place to get things done, but the variety of classmates was somewhat... limited.
First course of action, however, would be food. She hadn't realized just how famished she was until after she'd been walking out of the library, grumbling about honest mistakes and overwork. Maybe if she hurried and was very lucky she would catch the end of dinner and would be able to grab a few bites before heading back to the loneliness that was studying in her dorm. Of course, if Doe was honest with herself, she would admit that it wasn't all that lonely. She had friends in her house and in her year. But it wasn't the same, and she knew why.
Dorcas's eyes automatically slid to the Gryffindor table, but she immediately looked away. No. If she actually saw who it was she might have been looking for, then the rest of her night was doomed. She'd just throw caution to the wind yet again, and wouldn't get a single thing accomplished.
So it was with a determined step that she made her way to the Ravenclaw table and dropped onto one of the benches. This was all too ridiculous. Doe sighed heavily, running her hands over her forehead and through her hair, briefly staring at the plates that still lined the table. Ham sandwiches. Ick. Shepherd's pie. Acceptable.
Doe and Remus || Waiting
Doe ascended the steps, not sure why she was going all this way when she could just wait at a junction. To be honest, she wasn't sure why she did half of the things she'd done lately. It was like all self-control (well, what little she had, at any rate) had just been tossed out of the window overnight. She was more reckless than ever, and eventually it was all going to catch up with her. Doe just hoped that when that day arrived, no one else got hurt. She could deal with whatever consequences befell her for her actions. But if she dragged someone down with her... that would be unbearable. She would never forgive herself.
"Password?" asked a deep, yet still feminine voice. Doe looked up, surprised that she'd arrived at her destination so soon. A fairly large woman dressed in pink was staring at her critically, knowing that Dorcas Meadowes didn't belong where she currently stood.
"Oh, no! I'm just waiting for someone," responded Doe, holding her hands up in a pose of mock-surrender. No sense getting told off by a bloody painting of all things. The blonde backed up a few steps to lean against the railing opposite of the large woman.
Once again, Doe found herself wondering what in bloody hell she was doing here. She had no idea whether or not Sirius would even be passing by this area anytime soon. But there were only so many places the git could be, and he hadn't been in any of his usual haunts. She could easily have waited to see him in class the next day, or during one of the free periods they shared. So why was she here, outside the Gryffindor common room?
For some reason, no matter how long Doe stood there with her hands clasped behind her back and her weight resting on the railing behind her, she didn't leave. She thought about it a few times, but never actually did. After Merlin-knows-how-long she'd been waiting, she sat down on the ground and began to drum out one of her favourite songs, the melody weaving through her brain. A small smile tugged on her lips as she thought back to an afternoon that seemed so long ago. She'd discussed this band with Remus ages ago... she still couldn't believe that he'd admitted he liked them as well.
Hot Smut || Sirius and Doe
Read More
