The Accidental Homemaker

Knocked Up and Let Go

[reallyreallyreallytrying]

“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

[accidentalhomemaker]

Your Pantry Determines Your Pantry Meals

We ‘eat down the house’ before we go on trips, which is nice to both not spend money right before you leave town, and pleasing not to come home to something mysteriously rotting. Of course, this means when you finally return exhausted from a red-eye flight with a teething Lux and a food striking Fox (more on that later) the barren refrigerator can be daunting, to put it mildly. 

So tonight’s dinner, given the heat, and the lack of desire to go to the grocery store with impending thunderstorms and out of whack internal clocks, was a pretty remarkable success pulling from the dregs of my go-to resources: 

Cold Asian shrimp salad on rice noodles with edamame. 

Sauce 

Splashes of each to taste:

From the fridge: fish sauce, soy sauce, sweet chili sauce, lemon juice

From the cupboards: agave, white sugar, rice vinegar, black sesame oil

From the overgrown herbs: chiffonade of mint, chiffonade of basil.

From the onion bowl: thinly sliced small portion of shallot, microplaned one peeled thumb length’s of ginger, microplaned one large clove of garlic

Mix the marinade while you boil a large pot of water. Defrost frozen shrimp, which Dude I Married bought while I was away, and although tail on, were peeled and deveined, by running under water. Toss into boiling water and pull when just pink. Run under cool water to stop cooking, then drain, pluck off tails, and add to sauce. If a bit under done the acids will take care of it, but be pleased you seem to be mastering shrimps hold cooking. 

Meanwhile, to the still boiling water, add rice sticks you bought that were too thick to use for summer rolls, possibly last summer, whatever, they’re in the top of the pantry for nights like this. Skim foam because you like skimming foam. Add a little salt. Cook until soft all the way through, then run under cold water to remove excess gluten. Drain and toss with shrimp and sauce. 

Throw in a small sliced green pepper that grew in the garden pots while you were gone. 

Cook a half-empty bag of probably not freezer damaged edamame according to instructions. Shell and toss with kosher salt and serve of the side to make meal appear more nutritious.  

Astound Dude I Married who thought there was nothing to eat in the house. Delight both the carnivore child, and the child who wants to eat nothing unless proven unhealthy. 

[accidentalhomemaker]

Dinner tonight: rice bowl with Korean beef, tomago, bitter rapine, roasted acorn squash, and seaweed.

[accidentalhomemaker]

Not Doing It For The Likes

My baby turned 3 weeks old on Halloween. And we didn't dress him up. While Facebook and Instagram were awash with other family's photos of baby's first Halloween, jiggly infants in various states of unhappiness regarding their costumes, our social media was conspicuously silent. As was our lives. I had decided it wasn't worth it to make, or buy, him a costume when we were doing nothing beyond sitting on the couch for the evening, the prospect of trick-or-treaters dubious at best. Why invest in a costume? Just for the pictures to tag on our feeds?

He is a month old today. And once again, a social media milestone is being neglected. It's all the rage these days to stage a photographs, with some element of consistency, month to month to chart your child's growth. They range from simple to elaborate, clever to rote. And we're not doing it. We didn't pin ideas to our Pinterest boards, buy the supplies, and craft the props. 

In this age, with a camera in every digital accessory, GreyFox's infancy and childhood will be beyond well documented. I'm fairly positive he's already had more photos of him taken in his first month of existence than my sister had in her first decade. Yet with the abundance of visual documentation, there is even more pressure to get the same shot as everyone else, tick off the boxes.

When I was pregnant, we discussed if we were going to do the month by month development shots, and I half joking asked if our child was going to resent not having this memento of babyhood that all of their contemporaries will have. And now, in the moment, I feel how it's not a joke any more. All of his peers will have these staged monthly pictures, and he won't.

Although I hope I will raise the sort of person who, like his parents, questions the status quo and doesn't blindly do things because they are what's done, we are, by the choice of our omissions, setting him on a path defined by the absence of a certain kind of documentation. He may resent us for not making them, like my sister and me with our lack of photos thirty years before. Or, in the sheer monolith of pictures that will track his life, it won't even be noticed. The lack will only exist for his parents, in the now, on their social media, on their phones, in their group of friends. The missed opportunity of this young life.

[accidentalhomemaker]

Yesterday's walk in Glendinning rock garden, of which no rock garden could be found. There was a minor stream / pond, and then the doorway up some very steep crumbling slate steps up the cliff. Dozens of spidering paths along the edge of the cliff looking down to Kelly drive. The previously mentioned hobo fires and railroad tracks. 

Not pictured: the strangers having sex.

[accidentalhomemaker]

Dorky Hell Hound and I went walking around the lake down at FDR park this afternoon. We drove there, but depending on how the baby behaves inside, it's not unthinkable to walk down and do the whole park. It was a rather mild walk, but as you can tell by his ears, he clearly had a good time. 

Trying to get out and walk as much in nearby nature. Had a rough go yesterday. I was a bit traumatized by the location I tried in Fairmount. Ran into people having public sex straight away in the woods, barely off the trail, fully naked, and then a very trashed path, even for Philly. An unusually high number of hobo fire pits, and every trail I took hit the railroad tracks fairly quickly. Made me feel uneasy for popping off on my own. Pup enjoyed it though. 

The people in parks during the week are a strange lot. Sleeping in public, on benches, sprawled in the grass. Kids skipping school and fishing alongside an old man. Someone flying a drone. Lone men parked in cars in secluded places. A bunch of goombas arguing about a bike being stolen. Old men getting high and watching the squirrels. The occasional lone runner.

All the Philly parks are imbued with the nagging feeling of what used to be. The past is inescapable in them - they never just are as they are now, they alway make you think back on to what they were, 50 or 100 years ago; how glorious they must have been, rather than the unkempt, decaying, and defaced shadows of their former selves they are now. 

[accidentalhomemaker]

Baby GreyFox Update

We had our first birth class last night. I am pleased because the woman teaching it is subversively crunchy. In less fun news, I found out I have been sitting all wrong to properly align my babe in utero. I still have a bit of time, because GreyFox is very obviously still capable of swimming about and making full turns in there, so I have a few more weeks to go before I need to actually be concerned about which way they're pointing. I've been making an effort (sitting up at the table presently) but they make their displeasure at this position actively known, and it's going on two hours that I'm being rhythmically kicked. 

I've been having an irrational certainty lately that the babe doesn't like me anymore. Mostly because of the irritated kicks I get whenever I try to be productive, or sometimes when walking and they manage to cram themselves as low and heavy as possible inside me. Sometimes they align so it's nothing at all, but then other times it's as though they are trying to make me as uncomfortable and incapable of freely moving as possible.

The nursery's nearly set up, pictures to follow. Dude I Married did a fantastic job on the accent wall, and having the artistic social circle we do, we have been gifted some very cool decor. The shower was Sunday, many cloth diapers were given, and books, which is all I think babies really need, ultimately. I thought we'd get more clothes, honestly, because people usually can't resist a newborn onesie, but I suppose I run with a more practical crowd. We've been given hand-me-downs, so the first few weeks should be covered, and by then it will be the holidays and my mother-in-law is sure to flood us with new outfits.

I learned Dude I Married was born a month early, and I was 33 days premature, so now I'm fretting GreyFox will be an early arriver as well. The pregnancy has felt so solid and healthy though, I can't imagine they'll be ready to join us in two weeks. I'm fairly sure they'll be kicking about (literally) in me up until the full 40.  

But a niggling fear has begun creeping into the corners of my brain as we get closer to birth. The profound concern for their health, the worry that it can all go wrong in the labor itself. Fear begets fear, and since my mind is brimming with this process, it's inescapable, only temporarily banished to the periphery as best I can.

[accidentalhomemaker]

Kim's Brown Butter Cookies

I think of these as my friend Kim's cookies, since she makes them with some regularity, and no one can ever get enough of them. They're wee and savory, but definitely still a cookie. She finally shared the recipe, she bases her cookies off of, so I made a batch. Kim only uses one stick of butter when she makes it, but I must have had more moisture loss / added too much dry ingredients, because my dough was like sand and couldn't stick together at all. I ended up adding 1/4 stick of melted butter at the end to try to correct, and plan to make it next time according to the directions. Also, as my household swings savory, I added a pinch of kosher salt to the butter as it was browning. As with all recipes, your milage may vary. 

1 1/2 sticks unsalted butter

1/2 cup lightly packed brown sugar

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon baking soda

Salt for sprinkling (preferably fleur de sel or something else with a large crystal)

Preheat oven to 325 and line your cookie sheet with parchment paper. In a saucepan over medium heat, melt butter until it starts to caramelize. It should smell nutty and you will see brown bits at the bottom of the pan. Pour browned butter into a medium bowl and stir in brown sugar and vanilla. In a small bowl, whisk flour and baking soda. Add flour mixture to butter mixture until combined. Let cool to room temperature. Using a tablespoon or small scoop, drop dough onto cookie sheet. Sprinkle with sea salt and lightly press into top of cookies. Bake 15 minutes or until lightly golden. Don't overcook, or cookies will be too dry and crumbly.

[accidentalhomemaker]

Thing I Have Eaten That I Should Not Have Eaten Whilst Pregnant

Medium rare steak

Medium rare pork

Over-easy eggs

Raw eggs in carbonara

Hot dogs

Bahn Mi (multiple times)

Sprouts (in Pho)

Raw beef (in Pho) 

Coffee

Chocolate

Headcheese

Blood sausage

Leafy greens I am confident have not been washed

Raw dough of things I've baked

Charcuterie (too many varieties to mention)

Chicken Liver Pate

Soft cheeses

Lox

Sushi

Sips of beer, wine, cocktails

I've managed to not eat American deli meat from a grocery store, but somehow keep eating mysterious Vietnamese pork products. It's denial and arrogance, and as very typical of me, plain old anti-authoritarian defiance. I read the recommendations, how rare the possibility of anything happening is, and despite all the social pressure and shaming, say fuck it. If I'm craving a Banh Mi, or pate, or a headcheese taco, I'm eating one. I imagine that if I have a strong craving for something, there's something in it my body needs. Probably iron. I also still have the super taste and smell thing going on, so if it's funky I'm not powering through just to be a stubborn dick. I'm being reasonable in my eating ridiculous things. In my mind at least.

I've gotten sick once recently. From pizza.

I figure by this point it's all moot anyway. I've hit the trimester where a glass of wine now and then and a latte won't do any harm. But there is a pervasiveness to the experience of being pregnant where one is institutionally infantilized by society - you are expressly told you may not make the decision to consume things because of the very rare outside chance that something bad might happen, and judged if you chose to act with autonomy.

Being told you are not allowed to trust your judgement is hands down the least pleasant part of pregnancy.

[accidentalhomemaker]

Changing Pad Cover - Test Run

I knew a pretty simple project would be making some changing pad covers. It's essentially a rectangle with finished corners and elastic. Looking at home decor porn, the color and pattern can really tie a nursery theme together. But babies are explosively messy, so I know I want to have a couple options. 

Listen. I have a degree in fashion design that leaned heavily on studio practice and construction. I should be able to draft a very precise pattern. But, I am lazy, and the internet exists, so chances are someone else has already made one. I mean, changing pads are both standard and ubiquitous in households with infants. I found this tutorial and although that it's not cut on grain and nothing looks lined up makes my eye twitch, I liked that it was measure and cut rather than pattern and pin. 

I got rid of so much fabric when we moved, because, well, fashion major. Any time I went to a fabric store for a specific project it is difficult not to just buy other fabric that's interesting and a good deal. Moving to our new place was an exercise in downsizing. But then I got knocked up and I'm going to blame my hormones for making me go nuts with fabric.

So I had this space pattern flannel, which although adorable, is only tangentially related to our 'camping under the stars' nursery theme. I figured it was a good fabric to use to test a tutorial I wasn't sure about. 

I think the sides of my particular changing pad are taller/more extreme than hers, so it doesn't lay as flat as I would like. I was hoping more of a fit. Overall I'm not thrilled with the result, but it was a fairly quick project; I've just got to figure out how to modify it - if it needs larger seams in the corner, if it actually needs to be more contoured by being made with more than one piece.   

[accidentalhomemaker]

Baby Bunting

In the further adventures of unnecessary projects I've completed while avoiding things I should actually accomplish - pennants!

I remember reading something when I was planning my wedding (so either on A Practical Wedding or Offbeat Bride) that it's ok if your wedding looks particularly of the time it takes place, that classic is pointless, part of the joy of looking back on old wedding pictures is how of their time and trends they are.

So, pennants. They are all over the lifestyle blogs. For parties, for decor, for contemporary nurseries. I've mostly seen paper, but when they're fabric they tend to be either just cut and unfinished, or serged. But since I was making these to last, I figured I'd sew up some durable doubled-sided ones. 

Dude I Married and I debated a bit picking fabric. A testament to our marriage if how we've learned to compromised our very strong aesthetics and meet in the middle. He wanted the dark brown (which actually has a nice, swirly, vaguely faux bois pattern. I would have liked a little more variation in scale, but I like the details on all of the fabric. The blue chevron also has tiny polka dots, and the orange baric is a floral that coordinated to the blue and reads more as a check.

Anyway. Quarter yard of each, folded, cut, sewed right facing, pressed, turned, pressed, pinned (something I'm terrible about and nearly never do with craft projects) sewed, voila. 

It's hung in our hallway presently. Initially it was just to get a photo but it's been up for a month now. After we paint the accent wall in the nursery it will put up on the facing wall. 

[accidentalhomemaker]

Pickle Housewarming Gift

I don't know why I was surprised to receive so many housewarming gifts. Everyone in my social circle has unlocked level actual adult at this point. It was still a very sweet surprise for me. We were gifted some towels, candles, dishes, cute juice cups, fresh herbs from two different people, and wine, of course. But I have to share this cute idea from my friends Jenn and Sutter.

Sorry for the instagramish coloration. I shot this in low light last night.

Their present was some fresh cucumbers from their garden, an empty pickle jar, and then a mini glass of spices, along with instructions how to turn it all into pickles. The presentation is especially adorable.

Well done, friends. Well done.

Now let's see if I actually make these lovelies into pickles or just eat them raw.

[accidentalhomemaker]

I tried to post this earlier but we hosted our housewarming party today and lss I am exhausted and didn't get a photo of my very pretty rosemary cherry strawberry lime ginger grapefruit sangria I couldn't drink. Brandied the cherries for three days.

Pictured: charcuterie and cheese; blueberry pie bars, zucchini quiche, summer salad.

Be proud of me for keeping the refreshments low key.

[accidentalhomemaker]

Flowers

I hate how Martha's right. They're all right, those lifestyle blogs. Having fresh flowers in a room brings it alive, somehow. (Forgive the Gothic lighting, I think I snapped this on an afternoon right before a thunderstorm.)

I find flowers to be nearly prohibitively expensive in Philadelphia, not an inexpensive indulgence. When we went back to visit my family in Portland, I got angry at how affordable flowers were everywhere. A very simple and small bouquet at the farmers market is easily $30 in this city, and in PDX stems were like, a dollar each. 

Regardless. I do treat myself from time to time. I tend to stick to hearty blooms that will last a week with a few changes of water, passing by the more delicate blossoms. Lilies and Hydrangea and Sunflowers make the most frequent appearance in my home, but I get bored. I usually end up with supermarket blooms, especially since I moved South out of Center City and my options are even more limited. I wonder if there are any good local resources I'm not aware of?

[accidentalhomemaker]

Papa's Greek Summer Spread

Eating is a chore these days. As my pregnancy progresses, I know it's more important than ever to eat healthily, and I'm less and less inspired to make anything for myself. I took the glucose test the other day and was ravenous when I got home. Because we had just gotten back from vacationing, and I try to eat down the fridge before we go, I was missing some essential items. I did have some fresh feta, however, so I decided to whip up something my father used to make for me.

My Papa is a teacher, which meant summers at home with my sister and myself. He also is a good cook, when he feels like it, and a prolific gardener. As a teenager I have many memories of reading on the couch, only to have my Papa wander away and come back bearing snacks. This is one such recipe he whipped up.

Smash up some feta with some diced artichoke hearts at about a 1 to 1 ratio. If anything, dial back on the cheese.

Add diced kalamata olives, a sprinkle of dried oregano, a smidge of garlic powder, and a hint of spanish smoked paprika.

Smoosh everything together until it is a pleasing creamy consistency and all the ingredients are well combined. 

Given the ingredients no salt is required. This makes a great dip for crackers, or the base for a wrap. The other day I decided to spread it on toasted rosemary focaccia and liberally top with fresh spinach. It was so simple to make and very satisfying. Nothing is more disappointing than eating something that doesn't fill a craving. 

[accidentalhomemaker]

Mini Key Lime Pies

In a shocking turn of events, I made a citrus-based dessert the other week. Mini Key Lime Pies! At least it's lime, not lemon. I don't know who I'm trying to impress. I've never been fond of overly sweet things, so even while I'm craving sweet things, they still tend to be sour or savory. As always, I had to tweak the cooking time for my strange oven, and, as always, since I was juicing four large limes, I went ahead and zested all of them instead of just adding a tablespoon the recipe calls for. I never add the proper amount of spice or zest. 

This is a very dramatic picture, but it's hard to know if they are "right" or not. I have no memory of ever having a proper key lime pie, but they are a nice balance of tart, nearly bitter (due to my extra zest) creamy topping and the sweet and chewy crust.

Dude I Married wasn't really a fan, so I don't think they'll be entering a regular rotation in this house.

[accidentalhomemaker]

Did I never post my pillows? They were pretty much my first project I worked on since moving. I had made the previous pillows as well (pictured atop) but new house, new couch, new look. I took them apart for material (finding a yet another previous layer of pillow I had also made) and augmented to make the new set more firm. Limited by the yardage I bought the dimensions changed, but I think they fit the lines of the sofa better.