When Eddie was small, the highlight of his night was his mom calling him for bedtime, and entire event for them. His mom had turned it into a singalong so Eddie remembered all the steps.
Her sleepy bear song for the littlest bear, Eddie.
It was silly and cute and Eddie loved it every time. Even after she was gone and his dad turned into a ghost, Eddie sang, to himself and through every rough night.
Wayne never questioned him when he hummed, hummed along with him when he was home.
Song turned to memory the older he got and eventually stopped.
Until he finds himself padding into Steve's bathroom to brush his teeth with the toothbrush left there from his many nights over. The tune comes back to him.
Steve curls around behind him, nosing at the back of his neck, already having brushed his teeth. "What chu singing baby?" he murmurs, sleepy after the day they'd had out with the kids.
Eddie pauses, brush in his mouth. He hadn't even realised he was humming.
"Oh," he mumbles through the froth in his mouth, suddenly nervous. This is Steve though, why should he be nervous? Steve who tells him every little secret, confides in him the emptiness of his own home. He slides a hand over Steve's holding his middle, accepting his embrace.
"It's um, my mom's bedtime song,"
Steve peeks at him through the mirror, soft smile inviting him to continue. Eddie's not sure his heart could grow any larger with love for this unexpected man, it was too much to contain.
In a single look, Steve had him wanting to bare his entire soul.
Eddie spits the toothpaste, rinses, and leans back into Steve's embrace.
"Little bears wash their feet underneath, brush brush brush their teeth, rinse their beary faces and plod plod plod all the way to bed and dream of being little aces,"
Steve watches him the entire time.
As the soft song leaves Eddie's lips, Steve pulls him in tighter, "That's the cutest thing I've ever heard. Your mom was amazing."
He's already bursting at the seams, filled with such care from a man he'd never have thought capable.
Eddie turns, curls his arms around Steve's neck and leans in.
He kisses him, not rough, not like the raging waves of love inside him want to, but soft, tender. Steve breathes into it, like he's meditating, zen in the space between them.
"Can I sing it too?" he asks, fingers brushing Eddie's cheek.
"Together. We'll sing it together." Eddie promises.
eddie quietly lets himself in through the front door of the harrington house, careful not to bang the bags he's carrying off of the entryway table.
one bag has steve's antibiotics and a jug of orange juice, and the other contains steve's usual order of a deluxe double bacon cheeseburger with an order of curly fries and a banana peach milkshake. eddie will put the burger in the fridge for later and steve can munch on the fries and milkshake with eddie's help.
eddie goes into the kitchen to do just that but he freezes in the doorway, because steve is supposed to be upstairs sleeping off the flu—not standing in front of the toaster with severe bedhead, dressed in a pair of pajama pants and thick wool socks with a sweatshirt thrown on over a hoodie.
steve raises a shaky hand up to rub his eye and the little wobble of his bottom lip is what spurs eddie into action.
"baby," he says, crossing the kitchen and gently pulling steve away from the counter. a piece of toast springs from the toaster as eddie takes in steve's rumpled appearance. his eyes are bleary and glassy and his skin is hot to the touch. "what are you doing out of bed, sweetheart?"
"eddie?" steve blinks slowly at him, swaying on his feet a little.
eddie leands him into the living room before he collapses and bundles him with blankets in the soft recliner in front of the tv. he can feel steve shivering under his layers of clothes.
"thought you weren't coming back," steve mumbles, his eyes sliding shut when eddie places an open palm on his forehead, checking his temperature.
eddie frowns and slides his hand up to steve's hair, gently brushing the floppy strands and scratching at his scalp. "i just went to pick up your meds and some food," he assures him with a kiss to his forehead. "not leaving until you're all better, i promise."
the mention of food makes steve perk up a little. "what'd you get?" he asks, even though his stomach rolls.
eddie brings out the fries and his milkshake and sure enough, steve only takes a couple bites and sips before he’s conked out once more, his head flopped to the side and quietly snoring through his open mouth.
even sick, he's still adorable, eddie thinks as he finishes the rest of the fries and milkshake.
for @steddiesmuttyseptember prompts 'sneaking around' and 'lingerie'
rated e | 18+, minors dni or i will tell your mother | 2852 words | check ao3 for all tags
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Steve is pissed at Eddie.
Like, genuinely pissed.
Not that cute, haha my boyfriend was being annoying but I love him, pissed.
The kind where if he saw him right now, he’d do something really stupid, like yell or break up with him.
And he knew he didn’t actually want to do that.
But see, Steve had been given incorrect information about what they would be doing tonight. He’d been told they’d be having dinner alone and then going to the quarry alone and probably going back to Steve’s house alone.
When they showed up at the diner to a table full of Eddie’s bandmates, Steve’s teeth gritted together to hold back saying something much more rude than he intended.
It was fine, though, because Steve did actually like hanging out with the guys despite their rough start. They were some of the few people who knew about Steve and Eddie’s relationship, so they didn’t feel like they had to hide anything.
Well, Steve did tonight.
He was wearing his usual clothes, of course, but underneath, he was wearing a lingerie set. Something Eddie had been begging him to wear for months now, something Steve had tried on at least 20 times before only to hurry out of them because it felt too good. He figured with how much they’d be alone tonight, he could get used to the feeling of the lace against his skin at dinner and then surprise Eddie with it when they got to the quarry.
It’s all he’s thought about since Eddie picked him up.
He’s certain it’s written all over his face throughout dinner. Gareth keeps shooting him these looks like he knows Steve’s hiding something, and Jeff has asked him if he’s okay at least three times since they sat down. Frankie doesn’t say anything, but he does hand Steve a joint when no one else is looking and tells him to relax a little.
If Steve was smart, he probably would have snuck a few hits from it before Eddie got in the van.
“That was fun,” Eddie said as Steve contemplated trying to run back inside to the bathroom so he could strip the lace off and shove it into his pockets.
“Uh huh.”
“Sorry I didn’t tell you they’d be joining us, sweetheart.”
Steve gives him a half-hearted smile. “That’s okay. Um, are we seeing anyone else tonight?”
“Oh! There’s a bunch of people hanging at the quarry. I think even Robin’s gonna be there.”
Steve nods a little too enthusiastically to be convincing. “Cool. Sounds good.”
Eddie’s eyes are on him, intense. “You don’t sound happy about it. Thought you’d be a little more excited about hanging with Robin. You just told me yesterday you haven’t gotten to spend time with her outside of work for weeks.”
“No, you’re right,” Steve sighs. “I just wasn’t expecting to be…social.”
“We planned a date?” Eddie sounds genuinely confused, as if he doesn’t know the difference between hanging out one on one and in groups.
“Yeah, I just.” Steve sighs again. “It’s fine. Let’s go hang out with people.”
Eddie looks like he wants to push and understand why Steve is suddenly so worried about being around people, but Steve leans in to kiss him quickly, just a soft peck on the lips. He smiles and Eddie smiles back.
Instant distraction.
Eddie has admitted before that Steve has a way of making him go completely dumb. Some would call it dick brain, but it’s not even that he gets hard about it. He just feels like all thoughts have left the building.
Like Elvis, man,, he’d said when Robin asked what his deal was after Steve had kissed him goodbye at work.
As Eddie drives them to the quarry, Steve shifts in his seat. He’s not uncomfortable, but he definitely worries that he will be when all eyes are on him. Maybe they won’t know that he’s nearly bursting out of blush pink panties and a matching bralette that rubs against his nipples in a way that feels like Eddie’s teeth when they’re teasing him. But maybe they will.
But are his nerves because he’s worried people will know?
He can feel his dick hardening against the damp lace.
No, he doesn’t think he’s all that worried about people seeing him in lingerie.
Eddie’s door slamming is the only thing that alerts him to their arrival. He blinks and opens his door so he can hop out, but he’s immediately frozen when he feels the head of his dick rubbing against his jeans.
So maybe next time he can buy a size up. Or find some made for men. Do they make them for men?
“Stevie?” Eddie’s voice is against his ear, sending chills down his spine as his hand ghosts between his shirt and waistband. “You sure you don’t wanna go home?”
“I’m sure,” Steve shivers.
“We won’t stay for long,” he promises.
Steve just nods.
He does what he’s supposed to at these things: makes smalltalk with people he doesn’t know that well, hangs around Eddie and Robin as much as possible, smiles and laughs when appropriate.
But his brain is gone.
Well, it’s there, but it’s made of lace and the sweat beading at his brow despite the fall chill.
He doesn’t know how long they’ve been here, but he thinks he’s gonna have to go soon.
Eddie’s fingers grasp his forearm.
“Steve.”
Steve looks at him.
Eddie knows.
His face is flush and his pupils are huge, looks like he would bite a bruise into Steve’s neck right now, in front of all these people.
“Van. Now.”
The van is surrounded by cars. Empty cars, but still cars that belong to people.
Steve should probably just explain what’s going on, and then maybe they could just go back to Steve’s house and never bring this up ever again.
But he doesn’t. He knows they’re about to fuck in Eddie’s van, and he knows everyone at this gathering is busy, and he thinks maybe this will be the night that someone finds out exactly what Steve and Eddie are to each other.
Eddie doesn’t let go of his arm as they walk, which puts them both at a strange angle. No one seems to notice, but Steve’s not sure he’d be aware of anyone looking their way at this point. His brain is fuzzy, and all he can think about is Eddie stripping him down to the lace barely covering him in the back of his van.
No one is near the cars when Eddie opens the backdoor of his van and gently nudges Steve inside. No one is there to see the way Eddie watches him fall face first on the blanket he keeps laid out, barely holding back a groan at the way Steve’s ass is up in the air, taunting him even while fully clothed. No one except Steve feels his heartbeat racing as Eddie closes the door and grips his calf.
“You’ve been on edge all night. I was starting to worry you were sick or I’d pissed you off, but it’s not either of those things, is it?” Eddie leans over Steve’s back, bracketing him in until he has no choice but to fall flat against the blanket. “You wanna be fucked.”
Steve whines.
“But why? You knew we’d go to your house later. You knew I’d take care of you. So why are you acting like this?” Eddie continues, breath hot against Steve’s neck.
His hand ghosts under Steve’s shirt, fingers trailing against his skin and leaving goosebumps along the way.
Steve’s breath catches when he feels Eddie’s touch pause against the line of lace across his back.
“Stevie. What’s this?” Eddie sounds much calmer than he probably is.
“It’s a…bra. It’s a bra.”
Eddie’s forehead falls to Steve’s shoulder blade, and he lets out a huff. It may be a laugh or it may be a sigh, or it may be anything else.
“I don’t know what the hell I did to deserve you, sweetheart.”
His lips are soft against Steve’s neck.
Steve melts further into the blanket, but can’t completely relax until Eddie’s seen– or felt– everything.
“Um, there’s more,” he says as he starts to turn over so he can face Eddie. “And it might be a little weird and it might not even look good anymore because I’ve been hard for most of the night, but-”
Eddie silences him with a kiss to his lips, the taste of the last cigarette he smoked still on his tongue.
He keeps kissing him, even when Steve moans and bucks his hips up, seeking friction that’s easily found. His hand traces the waistband of Steve’s jeans, a fingertip dipping just past the denim to find what Steve’s been hiding.
“Oh.”
Steve smiles nervously. He knows Eddie would never make him feel bad, even if he didn’t happen to like the lingerie, but he’s still nervous. He still wants Eddie to like it, to like the way he fills them out, to like him.
“Can I see?” Eddie asks, eyes wide with awe and cheeks blushing the same pink as Steve’s panties.
Steve nods because he doesn’t think he’ll sound confident if he says anything out loud.
Eddie slides his pants off quickly, but his hands are gentle, almost reverent in the way they glide across Steve’s thighs.
He doesn’t say anything, just gestures for Steve to sit up so he can pull off his shirt.
When Steve’s been stripped down to only pink lace, he’s warm and anxious.
Eddie’s eyes don’t know where to go, zipping from his nipples barely visible through the thick floral pattern covering them down to the see-through wetness of his cock leaking through the thin material. Steve waits for him to say something, can’t interrupt whatever thoughts he’s having right now.
“You look beautiful, Stevie.”
It settles something in him, some last nerves that he knew wouldn’t go away without Eddie’s confirmation that this wasn’t a waste of time or money.
“I do?”
Eddie’s palm cups his cock through the panties. “You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. When did you get these?”
Steve shrugs because he doesn’t really remember anymore, and even if he did, it’s not important. What matters is that Eddie fucks him while he wears them, and that he goes to buy more on his next trip into the city.
It’s softer than Steve expected.
Eddie’s taking it slow, touching him everywhere, letting his fingers trace the patterns of the lace and smiling when Steve shivers under his attention. He seems mesmerized and Steve feels adored, loved.
Usually, Steve prefers feeling Eddie’s skin against his, but the way his clothed cock brushes against the lace panties, and the way his chest rubs against the bra, it’s a constant reminder that Steve did this to feel nice and for Eddie to look at him.
“Fuck me,” Steve whispers against his lips when he feels his stomach tighten. “Please fuck me.”
“Here? You sure you don’t want me to just suck you off?”
Steve thinks about the people crowded near the coolers and picnic tables not too far away.
“Yeah, here. I need you.”
He knows Eddie can’t resist that.
Now, Eddie’s quick, but no less gentle, as he opens Steve up on his fingers. The lube he keeps in the van is finally getting some use.
Steve arches into it, sighing out the pleasure Eddie gives, keeping as quiet as possible in case someone decides to come back to their car before they finish.
He’s got panties pushed to the side, his precum dribbling onto his stomach, and Eddie’s raspy voice in his ear telling him everything he’s gonna do to him when they’re home. Steve can get off with just this, has gotten off to this before.
“You ready?” Eddie finally asks him, pulling his fingers out so he can wipe them off and get his own pants pulled down.
“Been ready. Could’ve fucked me ten minutes ago,” Steve replies with a smirk.
His head is fuzzy, but the knowledge that they could be caught keeps him present, keeps him aware of everything happening in a way he knows he wouldn’t be if they were in the privacy of his room.
“I don’t like your tone,” Eddie jokes as he lines himself up, pushing the lace further out of the way. “I don’t wanna hurt you. You’re too soft for that tonight.”
“Someone’s feeling sappy,” Steve gasps as Eddie enters him slowly. He lifts his head to watch as Eddie bottoms out, his cock rubbing against the side of the panties. “Fuck.”
“That’s what I’m trying to do.” Eddie groans. “You feel so good. You look so good. I wanna eat you out when we get home.”
Steve nods as his hands grip the blankets. “Yeah. I have a-” Steve whines as Eddie shifts slightly, changing the angle so he brushes against Steve’s prostate. “I have a plug.”
“How the hell did you sneak that in here?”
“Yesterday when you were in the shower,” Steve laughs breathlessly. “Fuck, Eds. So good.”
Eddie is focused now, on not coming or coming, Steve can’t be sure.
“God, you have to wear these all the time,” Eddie groans as his hand creeps up to his chest, thumb rubbing against one of Steve’s nipples. “I want you in every color. Wanna see you in red, and blue, and black, and fuckin’-- what other colors are there?”
Steve giggles. “Purple…yellow…fuck.”
Steve’s gonna come and Eddie’s gonna follow right behind him, he can tell. Eddie’s thrusts are erratic but accurate, always hitting the spot that makes black spots appear in the corner of Steve’s vision and his limbs tingle with warmth and sunshine.
“You’re so good to me, fuck, Stevie. I love you,” Eddie squeezes his thigh as he parts his legs further. “You’re mine.”
“Yours. Yours,” Steve’s head falls back as he shakes through one of the most intense orgasms he’s ever had. He can’t catch his breath, and he feels overstimulated within seconds. “Eddie, need you.”
Eddie always gives him what he needs.
They’re both coming down still when someone bangs on the back door of the van. Steve sits up so quickly, he almost breaks Eddie’s nose.
“Yeah!” Steve yells, pushing Eddie off of him, barely containing a whimper when his cock is no longer filling him.
“If you two wanna get dressed before people start heading to their cars, now would be a good time!” Robin whisper-yells against the door.
“Got it!” Steve yells back, already trying to slide his pants back on despite the mess on his stomach and dripping from his hole.
Eddie places his hands on Steve’s, making him pause for a moment.
“Did you do this for me or for you?” He asks, suddenly shy.
Steve couldn’t help feeling a little proud of the fact that he was maybe the only person Eddie Munson ever got shy around.
“I did it for both of us. And I promise I’ll do it again if you let me get dressed so we don’t get caught.”
Eddie beams at him, kisses his cheek, and starts to pull his own pants back up, wincing when his boxers cling to his sensitive and wet dick.
“We’ve gotta plan better for these things,” he complains.
“I planned just fine.”
“The plug!” Eddie’s eyes widen in panic. “Where is it?”
“We don’t have time,” Steve groans, but he looks over his shoulder at the bag he keeps behind the passenger seat. It’s mostly full of snacks and Tylenol, sometimes a change of clothes if he knows he’s staying with Eddie. Last night he managed to get a plug in there. “Okay! Okay, fine. Just, go start the car.”
Eddie claps his hands together excitedly and grins. “As you wish, my liege.”
Steve rolls his eyes fondly. He reaches down to ease the plug in, biting back a whimper at the soreness he feels. They weren’t even rough tonight, couldn’t be, yet Steve feels like they just went for three rounds.
“If it hurts, don’t do it, sweetheart,” Eddie says from the driver’s seat.
“No, it’s good. I’m good,” he says as he pulls his pants up and slips his shirt on.
Eddie glances over his shoulder and frowns.
“Why the face?” Steve asks.
“I can’t see the lace.”
“Eddie…”
“I know! But I’m speeding on the way home.”
Steve slides into the passenger seat and looks out the window to make sure no one is directly next to them. When he doesn’t see anyone except Robin walking back towards the party, he leans over to kiss Eddie’s cheek.
“Thank you for letting me try something new.”
Eddie blinks over at him. “Thank me? Thank you. Holy shit, Steve. You’ve never been hotter than you are right now.”
“Okay, okay. Drive us home so I can ride you.”
“Fuck. Okay.” Eddie puts both hands on the steering wheel. “Focus, Eddie.”
Eddie had posted a photo on Instagram holding his acoustic guitar, cross legged on a chair.
Recently he had been front cover of a magazine of 'him' wrapped around a young woman. Living the Rockstar life.
His agent had suggested he show a more domestic side to him, a softer side.
Hence the acoustic.
It was summer so Steve was off of work and sleeping on the couch behind him, blankets up to his ears. The only thing visible was his hair peeking out and his arm hanging over the side of the couch. A sleeve of tattoos running down it all the way to his knuckles. Eddie loved that arm. He loved the way the tattoo curved around his knuckles like water. His nice, big. veiny hand that-
WOAH off topic.
He had done half the tattoos himself and made sure he payed for it all.It was the least he could do for all Steve has done for him.
They met eight and a half years ago, Steve had seen Eddie play at shitty clubs and recognized his mop of hair getting hit in the alleyway.
Eddie thought he was a goner for sure until Steve ripped the guy off him.
Steve just shot him a smile and complimented his guitar skills.
Eddie fell to his knees. He was gone for him.
He invited Steve to band practice as a thank you since he didn't have much to offer.
Two weeks later they were dating and Steve has been their number one fan since.
When Eddie got the record deal he dedicated everything to Steve.
Everything always was for him. As it should be.
Anyways,
Eddie posted the photo excited to promote the acoustic cover of his hit song 'My Hero, My Darling'.
The comments instantly went ballistic asking who the random man behind him was. He definitely wasn't in the band and why would notorious lady killer Eddie Munson have a man in his house...he couldn't possibly have friends.
Eddie responded to one comment only, knowing the rest would sort itself out.
"That's my darling ❤️"
----
"Eddie," Steve was frowning at him, poking his side with his foot.
"Eddie look at me this is serious."
"Yes my love?"
"You outed yourself. You were doing such a good job keeping this a secret. This will change everything."
Eddie turns over until his holding Steve close to him, his face in his hands.
"Good. I'm tired of hiding you my darling. I'm tired of the accusations."
"But Eddie you OUTED yourself."
"I won't say anything about you, I'd never out you Stevie. But I'm done hiding that I'm a simple man in love."
"...me too. I'm done too."
"Darling are you sure? This is a big deal. What about your school? Your principal?"
"I don't care. Everyone important to me knows. My family, my real family, know and don't care. They do wonder why I've been single for eight years but they'll get over it."
"Marry me."
"What?"
"Marry me oh my god that's the hottest thing I've ever heard. I love you so much please I can't live another moment not having you mine. Besides, if you get fired that's definitely a lawsuit and you know I've been pleasing for you to quit so I can take care of you, but you love those damn kids. Just...be mine...please."
"I've been yours. Since the start. Since always." They both have tears in their eyes.
"Yes?"
"YES OF COURSE YES!"
They're giggling through their kisses.
---
"Heeeeyyy everyone thanks for joining my live. I have something super important to inform you on! I'm getting married!!!!!"
The comments instantly flood in questioning him on moving too fast, asking if he's on drugs. The usual.
"Oooooh you guys have no idea."
----
The photo goes up an hour after the live ends.
It's Steve sitting on the couch, glasses on, red pen in his mouth. He's wearing a thick sweater and grumbling grading papers.
He looks so soft, so smooth, it's Eddie's favorite picture. The next picture in the carousel is Steve backstage at his concert. They're holding onto each other like they need each other to breathe.
The last picture is a selfie taken minutes after. Eddie with his stage makeup sweating off his face smiling brightly at the camera. and Steve kissing his cheek. Eyes squinted shut and eyeliner thick, he had worn it as a treat for Eddie.
It was well received.
The caption reads:
"I'm so happy to announce I'm marrying my best friend and partner of eight years! Everyone meet my darling. Steve is a local middle school teacher who has literally saved my life more than once. He saved my heart. God, I love him so much.
P.s. yes the tours are in the summer so Stevie can travel with us. I'd never leave him."
---
Bonus engagement edition:
"YOU'RE GETTING MARRIED TO EDDIE MUNSON?!"
"Yes. We've been over this."
Eddie stuck out his hand to shake, "hi, Eddie Munson, nice to meet you."
"YOU HID THIS FOR EIGHT YEARS?!"
"Yes."
"I'M BASICALLY YOUR BROTHER! HE'S MY FAVORITE CELEBRITY!"
"Yes Dustin and you can't keep a secret."
"...fair...welcome to the family."
*inspired by my friend only learning her cousin was marrying someone famous when he showed up to Thanksgiving and she lost her mind
(Originally posted as a thread on my twitter here)
In an angsty steddie mood so:
Thinking abt how Steve makes an effort to get into Eddie's hobbies, hangs out at Hellfire, and listens to his music, while Eddie is used to making fun of popular stuff and he doesn't think about how that also means he's making fun of stuff Steve enjoys.
He is obviously not TRYING to be a dick and he's such a sweet boyfriend, but he definitely rags on Steve when he wants to watch whatever game is on, makes fun of him when he listens to top 40, and teases him about how into fashion he can be.
Steve just rolls his eyes and laughs at him, says Eddie is just as self-absorbed as he is when it comes to his style, but the rest...it doesn't hurt, per se, but it falls in line with what Steve is used to - people don't care, and he's the one who makes the effort.
And Eddie is so good to Steve all the time, he genuinely loves him and takes care of him and is there for him, he just doesn't think about the fact that when he's dismissive of these things that matter to him, he's being dismissive about *Steve*.
It clicks one evening when Steve's talking about his day, how he went to one of Lucas' games and starts getting into the details about a specific play Lucas made, how impressive it was, but he cuts himself off mid-sentence and goes "you don't care, sorry-- how was band practice?"
And he's smiling at Eddie, fond and soft, but there's a tint of embarrassment at the corners of it, a pinch at his eyes. And Eddie's familiar with that look. Its the same look on his own face when he's been rambling about something for too long and somebody tells him to shut up.
It's the same look he gets when he's passionate and gets shut down and that discomfort coils in his stomach at the idea of being too *much*, of being annoying, of wearing out people's patience because he can't just keep his mouth shut.
And the worst part is - he'd been a few seconds away from cracking a joke about balls in laundry baskets and how stupid organized sports are and how nobody cares how good dumbass dudes are at throwing shit at other dumbasses.
And this time the discomfort in Eddie's stomach isn't embarrassment or shame, it's guilt. He can't stand that Steve has felt that way before - because he knows he has, he's heard the stories about his parents, knows Steve is too familiar with how bad it hurts to be insignificant.
But most of all, he can't stand the idea that he feels that way because of *Eddie*. That Steve isn't talking about something he cares about because he thinks - he knows, really - that Eddie will dismiss it.
And yeah, sure, it's a stupid basketball game. But it isn't stupid to Steve, and Eddie watches the air leave his boy's sails and his shoulders go a little tight like he's waiting for Eddie to make fun of it even while he's smiling and asking after Eddie, inviting a subject change
So Eddie waves a hand dramatically, rolls his eyes, "practice was fine, the usual - so what did Lucas do after that?" And Steve blinks at him in surprise, like he's shocked Eddie is asking.
"Um," Steve stutters, hesitates, and God Eddie feels like such an asshole, but he just keeps his eyes on Steve, does his best to look interested and engaged, and soon Steve is running through the game again, a small smile on his face, his enthusiasm obvious.
Eddie tries more after that. He asks about a song on the radio when Steve starts tapping his steering wheel to the beat. He stops complaining when Steve comes over to watch games with Wayne.
He even goes shopping with Steve, doesn't say a word when he fusses over two sweaters that look fucking identical from where Eddie is standing. He just shrugs and says "get both, sweetheart," and watches the way Steve grins when he gives his opinion.
Steve doesn't comment on what Eddie's doing, and Eddie doesn't make it a thing, but they can both feel the way their relationship feels more balanced now. Steve stops cutting himself off when he starts rambling, and Eddie still teases him sometimes, but it's playful, gentle.
And it's all worth it just for the way Steve fucking beams at him when Eddie joins him for Lucas' next game, holding hands in the family section and screaming themselves hoarse.
Steve’s parents send him on a gap year after high school in hopes that it’ll get him ready to apply to colleges and become a proper adult. They let him choose any of their three vacation homes so he chooses their condo in Paris.
He’s expected to find a job and himself.
The bakery down the block from the condo is owned by two old men who don’t wanna open anymore because they like sleeping in and sipping on their coffee on their balcony. Steve is happy to take over.
Especially when he sees the guy who works at the wine store across the road.
He’s in by 8 every morning, waving to the people coming in and out of the bookshop next to him and the bike repair shop next to them. His smile is contagious, and Steve often finds himself completely distracted by it even if he’s helping customers.
His long hair is always down when he gets there, but by the time Steve sees him leave in the afternoon, it’s pulled up and he has a sweaty sheen across his skin.
Steve decides to visit on his day off, maybe grab a bottle of wine even though he hates every wine he’s ever had to sip on at family functions.
But the man isn’t there when he stops by, or at least not at the counter. An older man is there, wrapping a bottle in paper for a customer who seems like they visit often.
It’s a small store, no bigger than the bakery, so it’s not like the guy could be hiding somewhere.
“Looking for something?” The older man asks as he walks around the counter towards Steve with a smile.
“Oh. Um.”
“You’re lookin’ for Ed right?” The old man’s smile turned into a smirk. “Ed! Customer!”
The man Steve had been seeing every morning and afternoon was suddenly rushing from the back of the store, clipboard in hand, hair sticking to his neck and forehead.
“Hi! What can I help you with?”
Steve could think of quite a few things he could help him with, but it probably wasn’t appropriate to say in front of someone else in his place of work.
“Sorry. Do you need me to speak French?” The man, Ed, asked in flawless French.
“No,” Steve assured. “I work in the bakery across the street. Just wanted to come by and say hi.”
Ed’s brows furrowed as he turned to the older guy who was already back at the counter trying to look busy.
“Does David need a bottle for something? He usually has Wayne pick his pairings.”
Steve shook his head. “No, not that I know of. I’ve just…um. Well, this is actually weirder now that I’m here. So I think I’ll go. Sorry to waste your time!”
Steve turned to go, but a hand grabbed his arm, tugging him back.
“Are you always this awkward?” Ed asked. Steve looked up from his feet to see him smiling. “It’s kind of cute.”
“Steve.”
“Steve. How about you come taste our sample bottle for the day? Maybe it’ll take the edge off,” Eddie offered, gesturing towards a side table that had an open bottle of wine and small sample glasses. “You like rosé?”
“I don’t really know.”
“Then let’s find out.”
Turns out Steve didn’t mind rosé that much, but maybe that was the company. The flavor was a bit less bitter than he was used to, going down much smoother without leaving a burning sensation on his tongue.
And later, after Eddie had talked to him for nearly an hour about himself and the store and his uncle who took him in and worked for him, Steve leaned in and got a taste of the rosé on Eddie’s tongue.
He’s not sure why he even comes to these parties anymore. He used to sell at the frat houses, made his rounds until he was out of product, made more money than any minimum wage job he could find near campus.
But he hasn’t in a while. Months, at this point.
It’s just that every time he came to one of these idiotic showing of riches and popularity, the most beautiful man he’d ever seen was sitting in the corner of the kitchen watching with a faraway look in his eyes. Sometimes he stood in a group of people in the living room, but never contributed to the conversation. Once, Eddie saw him swinging his feet back and forth in the water of the hot tub on the back patio with three different couples making out inside it, completely zoned out.
Eddie needs to keep an eye on him. Hence, he attends the stupid parties.
And it’s stupid, to go through so much trouble for a guy he doesn’t even know, who probably doesn’t even notice him back. It’s stupid, but Eddie’s never claimed to be very bright.
Which is probably why he walks up to the guy when he’s about two seconds from punching Tommy Hagan, grabs his wrists, and tugs.
“The fuck are you?” He asks Eddie, reasonably confused and angry at being interrupted by a stranger.
Eddie could feel his pulse against his fingers, swore he could feel a spark of electricity flow between them.
“Eddie. Just leave him. Whatever he did isn’t worth it,” he said through clenched teeth.
His fingers tightened around Steve’s wrists as he considered trying to pick him up, throw him over his shoulder, and walk out of this party entirely.
“How the hell do you know?” Steve wasn’t trying to pull away.
Eddie didn’t let himself think about that too much.
“I just know nothing Hagan does is ever worth trouble for you. C’mon,” Eddie tugged on his wrists again, and this time, it seemed to catch the guy off guard.
“Didn’t know you were into freaks, Harrington,” Tommy said as they took a few steps away from him. “If you’re gonna be gay, you could at least have taste.”
Eddie froze.
The guy, Harrington, tried to pull his wrists loose, but Eddie didn’t let him.
He turned to Tommy, the guy who almost got him arrested for selling at his party only a few months ago, and smirked.
If he was gonna out someone to a stranger, Eddie had no problem doing the same right now.
“And you just sucked my dick because you wanted to add it to your résumé?” Eddie grinned at Tommy, who quickly looked around to make sure no one else heard.
“As if I would-“ he tried to say, but Harrington cut him off.
“You forget you say shit when you’re high. You told me about it already. I think your exact words were, ‘he had the best dick I’ve ever seen, Steve.’ Or am I mixing that up with another dick?” Steve pulled one arm loose from Eddie’s grip, brushed hair from his face, and let it relax at his side.
Eddie could let go now, he was sure if anyone would start something at this point it would be Tommy. But Steve wasn’t trying to pull his other wrist loose and Eddie liked the warmth of him in his hand.
“Whatever man, just go. You don’t even wanna be here,” Tommy turned and left before Steve could respond.
Eddie finally let go, but he didn’t like the immediate sense of loss that filled his chest.
“You always interrupt strangers before they fight?” Steve asked him, hands shoved into his pockets.
Eddie really looked at him, inspected him. He only ever saw him at these parties, so the lighting was shit, but he’d noticed the dark shadows under his eyes a while ago. He noticed that he held himself in a way that showed he was always ready for a fight. Steve’s hair had gone flat over the last month or so, not nearly as voluminous or shiny as it had been at the start of the year.
“Are you okay?” He asked instead of answering the question.
“I’m fine, dude.”
Eddie shook his head. “You don’t seem okay.”
“Then why did you ask?”
“Just seems like something is bothering you,” Eddie wouldn’t push more, not if Steve was actually gonna get mad. But something told him that nobody pushed Steve to talk enough.
Eddie had Wayne back home, and his friends in his band here, and a couple coworkers at the bar he worked at twice a week now that he could joke around with. Steve didn’t even seem to have the people he hung around with.
“Why does it matter to you if something is bothering me?”
That’s a fair question. Why does it matter to him?
“Maybe because I just wanted to help. That’s what people do, right?”
“Not for me, usually.”
Eddie stepped closer, barely leaving space between them. “Well, I am.”
Steve stared back at him, shoulders dropping and eyes losing that angry fire.
“Why?”
Eddie was an idiot sometimes, but he was able to read people pretty well. It’s what kept him safe for most of middle and high school, and made him friends in college.
He knew what it looked like to be lonely and depressed, and Steve had check marks next to both of those.
“You wanna get out of here?” Eddie asked, once again avoiding his question.
“And go where?”
“I’ll show you my favorite getting high spot.”
“I don’t really smoke with strangers,” Steve seemed nervous.
“You don’t have to smoke. I’m just gonna show you the place.”
He watched Steve think about it, noting the way his brows scrunched together, how he bit his bottom lip, how he looked at the ground instead of at Eddie.
“Fine. But if you murder me in the woods, my mom will have you hanged,” Steve finally said.
“Hanged? Do they even do that anymore?”
Steve giggled. “Probably not. But she’d find a way.”
“Well, I’ve got no interest in murdering you, big boy.”
The blush that filled Steve’s cheeks was stunning. A perfect pink dusting his skin, giving him a healthier glow than what he’d had for a while.
“What do you have interest in?”
Eddie could say any number of things to flirt, make his true intentions clear, maybe even go straight back to his single dorm instead of showing Steve anywhere.
But Eddie figured that’s all Steve was used to, or maybe he was always the one who had to put an effort into things.
Maybe he wasn’t used to getting treated like a human being.
“I’d like to get to know you. Parties like this aren’t really a good place to learn about someone’s favorite song or what they snack on when they wake up in the middle of the night.”
Steve seemed shocked by this answer, but his features quickly melted into a soft smile, one Eddie would want to see every single day.
“Fine. But it’s not a date,” Steve held out his hand, ready to be led.
Instead of lacing his fingers with Steve’s, or even just grabbing his hand in his palm, he wrapped his fingers around Steve’s wrist again.
“We’ll see.”
———
On graduation day, Steve and Eddie found their way back to their spot, one they’d probably never visit again.
Eddie’s fingers were curled around Steve’s wrist as they stood facing each other, close enough to feel each other’s breaths against their lips.
Nearly two years together, nearly 300 trips to this spot, and more than 500 dates that they never called dates.
And it was just the beginning.
Eddie leaned in to press his lips to Steve’s gently, keeping it soft so they wouldn’t get carried away.
They had to meet Wayne at the Italian restaurant in less than an hour and then Steve’s mom expected them back at Steve’s apartment for a wine and dessert celebration.
They wouldn’t be properly alone like this again for at least a couple days, but they didn’t have time to do much about it right now.
“I love you,” Eddie whispered as he rested his forehead against Steve’s.
“I love you, too,” Steve said back.
He didn’t have dark shadows under his eyes anymore, spending more nights sleeping in bed with Eddie than awake at parties he didn’t want to be at. His hair had most of its shine back. He’d put on a few pounds after joining the gym again, using it as an outlet for stress instead of hiding in corners at parties where he would drink just enough to get buzzed four times a week.
He made friends with Eddie’s friends, plus some of his own when he got a part time job at the coffee shop on campus.
Steve never spoke to Tommy again, at least as far as Eddie knew. He didn’t seem interested in being his friend again, and once he told Eddie more about their “friendship”, he couldn’t really blame him.
“You ready to go see Wayne?” Steve asked him, probably more excited than even Eddie was.
Wayne and Steve bonded quickly and they’d probably spend most of the lunch talking about sports and where they would go fishing this summer.
Eddie nodded, but he pulled something from his pocket before Steve could pull away and start walking back to the car they now shared.
“What’s that?” Steve asked, pointing towards the envelope in Eddie’s hand.
“It’s a gift from me to you. Well, I guess both of us, but I really got it for you.”
He handed it to Steve, who opened it quickly.
He pulled out the paper inside and Eddie watched his eyes fly across the words written there.
“Eddie.”
“Stevie.”
“You got us a trip to Italy? How the fuck did you get us a trip to Italy?” Steve was looking at him, eyes wet with tears.
“Doesn’t matter how. Wayne gave us some money for it, so did your mom. I’ve been saving for a year. Want us to have something special before we have to start working.” Eddie kissed his forehead. “Plus I want any excuse to see you in some of those see-through linen shorts.”
Steve’s lips were on his, his arms wrapped around Eddie’s neck. Eddie wrapped his arms around his waist to hold him there.
“I’ll wear them every day,” he gasped as he leaned in for another kiss.
Eddie laughed. “You won’t hear any complaints from me, sugar.”
“I can’t believe you did this. All I got you was a t-shirt.”
“You know I love t-shirts. I know you love Italy. It’s a win-win for both of us.”
Steve rolled his eyes, but kissed him again.
His eyes widened. “Oh my god. Are you gonna propose in Italy?”
Eddie snorted. “Why would I answer that question?”
“Because! I have to know!”
“Why?”
“So I can make sure I have a nice outfit for pictures, dumbass.”
“You’ll just have to wait and see. You look good in everything,” Eddie kissed the top of his head before he wrapped his fingers around Steve’s wrist and tugged on it once. “Let’s get to Wayne before he sends a search party.”
Eddie smiled to himself as they walked to the car, Steve’s rambling about what he wanted to do in Italy keeping his mind from wandering too far. He couldn’t help thinking about the ring he had stashed away in his guitar case, though.
written for @steddiemicrofic june prompt ‘stuff’ wc: 483 | rated: G | cw: none
Eddie slumps on the couch, transfixed.
The small box in his hand flips open again, and the ring that lies within steals the breath from his lungs.
Gold, not silver, because it goes better with the tan Steve has held onto, even after all these years.
It’s been a long time coming, and they’ve waited and waited for things to be different- for the law to catch up with the people. But it hasn’t. And Eddie’s done waiting. He’s never cared much for the law anyway.
Eddie freezes at the key turning in the lock of their front door. The box snaps closed and he sits up, floundering. The door opens before he can decide what to do with the ring. Right as Steve walks in, he shoves it into the crack between the cushion and the arm of the couch.
Of course, Steve catches him, the greeting on his lips paused as he narrows his eyes.
“What did you just stuff in there?”
Eddie tries to relax- definitely fails at looking innocent.
“Stuff where?”
“In the couch.”
“Nothing.”
Steve grins, “Eddie,” with hands on his hips.
“I didn’t stuff anything anywhere,” he rushes out.
Steve chuckles and walks over to Eddie. He stands in front of him and they stare at each other, one fond and the other nervous.
Leaning down to kiss Eddie, one hand gripping the back of the couch, Steve whispers, “you’re such a shit liar, babe.”
Eddie can’t even deny it. He always tells Steve everything, so this is kind of killing him.
But now’s not the time. All he has is a ring. No plan, no speech prepared, and if he’s gonna do it, he’s gonna give Steve what he deserves.
Eddie’s softened to the idea of romance by now, loves it actually. But Steve craves it- looks at Eddie like he hung the moon every time he gives it to him.
So now’s not the right time.
He smiles, “I didn’t stuff anything anywhere,” slower, and a little teasing.
Steve straightens up, “is it drugs?”
“Nope.”
“Illegal?”
“Maybe.”
“Am I gonna pay for it later?”
“Hopefully.”
With a sigh, “you’re lucky I love you.”
Eddie melts. “I know,” and he grips at Steve’s hand, pressing his lips to his fourth finger in a gentle kiss.
Steve squeezes back in response, surrendering as he walks away. “We’ll see how long you can keep your little secret.”
Eddie stares after him, the rightness of his little secret warming his chest.
Later, when it’s the middle of the night and Eddie’s asleep, Steve sneaks into the living room. He contemplates, standing in front of the couch.
Instead, he tip toes over to the vase on a shelf, the one Eddie steers clear of in fear of breaking it.
He reaches in and pulls out his own little secret.
Silver, not gold, because it goes better with Eddie’s pale skin.
Steve wins the bat plush at a fair when he's seven. He doesn't care about bats, but it's the prize for making all five baskets in the basketball game, so he gets the little bat. Its eyes are a little crooked and one wing is slightly smaller than the other, but it being lopsided sort of makes it cuter.
He and his dad, they're supposed to be going on rides now, but his dad's pager keeps going off. He puts Steve next to a funnel cake stand, tells him not to move, and goes in search of a pay phone. Fifteen minutes pass, and Steve is bored under the flashing lights and tinkling music. He wants to play not sit and wait.
Eventually, he drifts back towards the midway, watches the people rushing by, searches for a sign of his dad's return. His attention is caught by another boy at the basketball booth. He has to be about Steve's age, with a mop of dark curls on top of his head and a jean jacket that's slightly too big, sleeves flopping over his hands as he lines up his shots.
This boy, he's terrible at basketball. Every shot is too high or too short or goes wide, but he's trying. Even from this distance, Steve can see how hard he's trying. He uses up his five balls, fishes into his jacket pocket for more money, and gets five more.
He misses every shot. This time, when he goes back for more money, he comes up empty. Steve thinks he sees his lip shaking.
A man, one in a leather jacket and boots that Steve thinks look mean, comes up to the boy, drops a heavy hand on his shoulder. He's too far away to hear the conversation, assumes the boy asks to play again and the man's response is a shaken head and a tight smile. They walk away from the games, right towards Steve, who slinks back to the side of the midway, not wanting to be caught staring.
"What was it you wanted? That stupid bat? Just another piece of trash you wanna bring in my house." Steve hears as they pass.
The boy nods, but keeps his eyes down and to the side.
He feels bad then. Felt bad before, but now he looks at his own bat, at its funny eyes and poorly attached wings, and wishes he could hand it over to the boy who really wants it. Steve almost does, then, makes to go after them, but his dad appears, dropping a hand to Steve's shoulder and saying, "ready to hit those rides?" And he knows the opportunity is gone, knows his dad will say it's too soft, not what men do.
Steve manages to lose himself for a while in the swirling lights and funhouse music and carnival rides, forget about the little bat in his back pocket and the boy who wanted one so desperately. But then his dad's pager goes off some more, he goes back to the pay phone, and Steve ducks into the low brick building that houses the bathrooms.
His eyes immediately land on the same boy from the basketball game. His eyes are red, face damp, obviously from tears, and Steve just--
"Here." He shoves the bat into the boy's chest.
For a second, the brownest eyes Steve's ever seen widen at him, before narrowing in a harsh glare, the boy's teeth barred.
"Why?" He snarls.
Steve thinks he may regret every choice that led him to this but he says, he says, "Because I want you to have it."
The boy blinks a few times, hand reaching out to gently pinch the bat's smallest wing. "You sure?"
Steve nods and the bat is slowly withdrawn from his grasp.
"No takesies-backsies?"
"It's yours."
The boy looks at the bat in awe, and Steve says, "see? It already looks happier with you."
The boy's beaming smile is cut-off by a voice calling from the door, "you in there,? I ain't got time to be waiting for your boohooing."
"Coming!" The boy carefully tucks the bat into an inner pocket of his jacket. "Thank you," he whispers, eyes big and glistening and happy, before he disappears out the door.
---
13 years later, give or take a few months, and Steve stands in the cracked shell of a bisected trailer, rummaging through what remains of a life well-lived, searching for anything whole. He's already found a few undamaged mugs and clean hats, but this room--it took a lot of damage. The brunt of it, really. Some sick sort of joke, after everything.
It's mostly rubble in here, scraps of fabric; slivers of notebook paper, magazine, poster; crumbled shards of vinyl and cassette plastic. A few times he comes across the disembodied limb of one of those dnd figures, and something weird happens to his throat.
In the far corner there's half of a dresser collapsed into itself, and he shuffles through the debris to see what he can find. There's something, soft and black, just the edge of it, peaking out from under half of a drawer face. He pulls it out, careful as can be and it's--it's a plush bat. It's a little dirty, but unharmed, though its eyes are a little wonky, and one wing is smaller than the other.
He holds it and he stares and he has to brace himself against the wall. It can't be--it's not the same one--but he remembers those big brown eyes and the curls and--
"Harrington," a warm, rich voice calls from what's left of the hallway. "You get lost in there?"
Eddie shuffles in, slow, careful with his crutches. And it--it took so long, months and months of convalesce and physical therapy, still physical therapy, but he's here. He's alive. He's perfect. And the something blooming between them, it's not spoken yet, but it's there, growing, and now, now--
"Oh my god, you found Lilith! I thought she was toast."
"Lilith?" He's still cradling the little lopsided bat in his hands, but moves closer to hand it over to Eddie.
"Yes, Lilith." Eddie takes the bat, presses it to his chest. "The first boy I ever loved gave her to me."
His heart turns over in his chest and when he swallows his throat clicks. Eddie doesn't notice, he's smiling softly at the bat, at Lilith, but then, "why are you looking at me like that?"
"First boy you ever loved?" He says. He thinks he sounds normal.
Somehow, Eddie's smile grows even softer. "Yeah. Roan County Fair, years ago. Tried to win her, but--" he clicks his tongue--"never had great hand-eye coordination. And then this kid just gave her to me out of nowhere. I used to think I was going to marry him."
"And now?"
Eddie laughs. "I grew up, Steve."
And for a second, he doesn't know what to say, but then, "I was right then, huh? That she'd be happier with you."
He stares at Steve, those same big brown eyes, wide and glistening. "Steve that was--Steve?" Eddie presses a hand over his mouth, overcome, before launching himself into Steve's arms. The crutches clatter to the floor, but Steve has him, will always have him, no matter what.
"I can't believe you kept her," Steve whispers.
"God, I carry her everywhere. She's Corroded Coffin's mascot, and you--Steve, I can't believe that was you."
"Surprise," he bumps Eddie's forehead with his.
They hold each other in the center of the destruction, but none of that matters right now, not when it feels like every moment since they very first met as children was leading them to this.
From the other half of the trailer, they hear footsteps, chattering, Wayne and Robin and Dustin, but Steve wants this to last a little longer.
"So, marriage...that still off the table?"
Eddie laughs softly, nuzzles his face against Steve's neck. "Are you kidding, sweetheart? No way I'm letting you go."
part 3 of the 2023 version of this post: adult books!
part 1: middle grade books | part 2: young adult books
this is a very incomplete list, as these are only books I've read and enjoyed. not all books are going to be for all readers, so I'd recommend looking up synopses and content warnings. feel free to message me with any questions about specific representation!
list of books under the cut ⬇️
yerba buena by nina lacour
if we were villains by m.l. rio
everyone in this room will someday be dead by emily r. austin
i want to be a wall by honami shirono
portrait of a thief by grace d. li
the thirty names of night by zeyn joukhadar
on earth we're briefly gorgeous by ocean vuong
love & other disasters by anita kelly
take a hint, dani brown by talia hibbert
boyfriend material by alexis hall
almost like being in love by steve kluger
the charm offensive by alison cochrun
something wild & wonderful by anita kelly
red, white & royal blue by casey mcquiston
something to talk about by meryl wilsner
honey girl by morgan rogers
one last stop by casey mcquiston
once ghosted, twice shy by alyssa cole
kiss her once for me by alison cochrun
a spindle splintered by alix e. harrow
finna by nino cipri
every heart a dooryway by seanan mcguire
the starless sea by erin morgenstern
under the whispering door by tj klune
space opera by catherynne m. valente
light from uncommon stars by ryka aoki
dead collections by isaac fellman
the city we became by n.k. jemisin
light carries on by ray nadine
an absolutely remarkable thing by hank green
feed them silence by lee mandelo
summer sons by lee mandelo
upright women wanted by sarah gailey
lavender house by lev a.c. rosen
fried green tomatoes at the whistle stop cafe by fannie flagg
the seven husbands of evelyn hugo by taylor jenkins reid
a master of djinn by p. djeli clark
witchmark by c.l. polk
a marvellous light by freya marske
a restless truth by freya marske
when women were dragons by kelly barnhill
plain bad heroines by emily m. danforth
a lady for a duke by alexis hall
infamous by lex croucher
passing strange by ellen klages
even though i knew the end by c.l. polk
the chosen and the beautiful by nghi vo
whiskey when we're dry by john larison
wake of vultures by lila bowen
silver in the wood by emily tesh
the once and future witches by alix e. harrow
the kingdoms by natasha pulley
a tip for the hangman by allison epstein
she who became the sun by shelley parker-chan
the song of achilles by madeline miller
spear by nicola griffith
this is how you lose the time war by amal el-mohtar and max gladstone
gideon the ninth by tamsyn muir
some desperate glory by emily tesh
all systems red by martha wells
a psalm for the wild built by becky chambers
the mimicking of known successes by malka older
winter's orbit by everina maxwell
fireheart tiger by aliette de bodard
empress of salt and fortune by nghi vo
legends and lattes by travis baldree
the house in the cerulean sea by tj klune
other ever afters by melanie gillman
the priory of the orange tree by samantha shannon
a day of fallen night by samantha shannon
a strange and stubborn endurance by foz meadows
the unbroken by c.l. clark
real queer america by samantha allen
fun home by alison bechdel
in the dream house by carmen maria machado
better living through birding by christian cooper
why fish don't exist by lulu miller
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