𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐠𝐨 𝐨𝐧

❝   𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲   𝐢𝐧   𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭   𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞.   ❞

[actssassinmoved]

a sad punk

[men-you-love]

[actssassinmoved]

I miss: this boy.

[actssassinmoved]

yooo   ,   so as i mentioned   ,   i’m gonna be moving barry to a fresh new blog in the next few days   !   active threads   /   and some asks will be moved over   &   all plots   /   dynamics will be continued   ! 

[actssassinmoved]

yooo   ,   so as i mentioned   ,   i’m gonna be moving barry to a fresh new blog in the next few days   !   active threads   /   and some asks will be moved over   &   all plots   /   dynamics will be continued   ! 

[actssassinmoved]

okay   ,   on a serious note   ,   been thinking about moving blogs this week. i feel i write with a good group of people   ,   &   seeing the follower list be over 400 is a little....stressful ahahaha i’m super flattered but i might try to keep myself to a smaller follow list just for my sake   &   because i have two other blogs i’m very active on in addition to this one. it means moving my aesthetic blog which sucks but also a fresh start on that couuuuld be good. i dunno   ,   will think on this more   !

[actssassinmoved]

that david and patrick gifset sent me   &   now i’m having all the feels.

[actssassinmoved]

holidays didn't really exist for barry. the closest to celebrating he ever got was eating take out with fuches on thanksgiving/x-mas in run down hotels. so when he's not a hitman/retired and gets to actually enjoy the holidays, it means the absolute world to him.

[actssassinmoved]

*ray person   /   bestdamnrto !

they are a team      ,      now more than ever      ,      now more solid than ever .   since the pincus case has gone down it seems to be that they both have proven what they are made of and what would be the thing that would cross a line for them    (     funnily     ,     it respectively included the other being in danger and neither of them coping well or rational with it     )       ,     where their priorities lie .   not only because of the updated status of their relationship      ,     but more so because they have never made it clearer during a case and just in front of each other that they would go to the ends of the earth for each other without worry of not giving it their all .   ray’s meant it when he told barry he was the one     -     is the one    -     and he probably always would so for the rest of his life      ,     but to see his partner go so thoroughly and continously after skinner and his wrongdoings just hammered the fact home in a way that left him a little breathless whenever barry came out of another meeting or told him what went down while ray did some work in their office .   as if his heart would be sinking into some place of himself he hasn’t known existed before the other came into his life      ,      before he got the permission to let his heart go anywhere .   “    no other word about it .   but i mean it     ,     you’ve got all the sappy parts of me and everything else too   ,    blue .   solid hook on me you’ve got there . ”  comes the honest answer    ,    brown eyes only breaking away when barry rests their foreheads together     ,     hands running into his partner’s hair and tugging him forward to kiss him again     ,    something less demanding but not less loving .   “     well     ,    not surprised about that .  he likes to stick to his story when he got it    ,    and it would make him look bad if word would come out he basically kept an agent from working a case under him .   doesn’t suit him well you’re all in charge and right about what you’re saying .  turns out what he needed you for is now biting him in the ass .  a development i like to see    ,    though     ,    you’re hot when you go all doctorate on people .”

f he were a braver   ,   more daring man   ,   he’d be really sticking it to skinner where it hurts. getting higher ups involved to truly investigate these wrongdoings further   ,   maybe even taking it a step beyond   &   having his partner right here   &   now in the computer chair   ,   in the little basement office they had both essentially been banished to   ,   perhaps the biggest   ‘   fuck you   ‘   he could ever hope to give to skinner   ,  with an added thank you for bringing the two agents closer   (   in more ways than one   !   ).   but   ,   barry had some decorum left in him in   ,   even after the drama that came with the pincus case. he would at least try to appeal to their superior through more   ‘   polite   ‘   conversation   &   discussion. surely he’d get sick of him coming into his office so consistently just to talk about these cases   ,   right   ?   the former idea of bringing in the higher ups wasn’t something barry had completely wiped off the table   ,  but doing that could also mean the discovery of his   &   ray’s newfound relationship   ,   &   barry could be accused of going after skinner under a   ‘   conflict of interest  ,   ‘   which could lead to him being assigned elsewhere to prevent further drama. oh yeah   ,   he knew skinner wouldn’t even bat an eye at that if it meant less arguments   &   pestering from him   ,   so the doctor wouldn’t even dare give him the satisfaction. instead   ,   he’ll just enjoy himself here with ray in the quiet of their little   ,   strange home   ,   eyes fluttering shut as he’s tugged in for another kiss   ,   hands bracing themselves on either sides of his knees   ,   groaning against ray’s lips. fuck   ,   why did he deny himself this for so long   ?   five long years   ,   he was fucking nuts.   ❝   i’m not giving up. now that i finally got my head out of my ass   ,   i’m gonna fucking do the same for him even if i have to do it with him kicking   &   screaming.   ❞   barry mutters   ,   large hands moving from his knees to move to ray’s suit jacket   ,  working the buttons on the front   ,   moreso because he just wanted them both more comfortable. blue eyes regard him with pure adoration as he speaks   ,   humming happily at the little compliment he tacks on at the end of his spiel. oh ray   ,   ever so bold. one of the many things he truly   ,   truly loved about him.   ❝   you keep calling me hot   &   i’m starting to actually believe it  ,   ❞   he teases   ,   hands slipping under his jacket coat   &   slowly sliding it off   , hands quick to feel the muscles of arms through his white button up   ,   trying to memorize the tattoos he’s seen long before they had become romantic. fuck   ,   he could feel his heart uptick as they continued to remain this close   ,   leaning in as he steals another kiss   ,   one hand resting on the side of his face   ,   pads of his fingers feeling the light stubble found across his cheek.   ❝   uh   ,   you’re hot when you tell me i’m hot   ,   you know   ,   ❞   he says with a shy smile   ,   thumb gently stroking his skin.   ❝   i know i’ve said it a bunch   ,   but i’m sorry i made you wait around for me. i uh   ,   i was jerk to make you suffer.   ❞   barry knows part of it wasn’t really his fault   ,   but he can’t help but feel just a slight bit guilty   ,   knowing his partner thought of him attractive   ,   never once realizing he slowly began to fall for him   ,   &   barry in turn. they have been each other’s biggest fans   ,   biggest support systems over the years   &   now that he realizes his feelings   &   isn’t afraid to show them   ?   he’d make up for lost time by fighting for him   ,   loving him freely whenever they have a moment to themselves. shy smile grows a bit more confident as the doctor leans in closer   ,   pressing a kiss to his forehead   &   then the tip of his nose   ------   sweet   &   speaking volumes.   ❝   but i’m here now   ,   ❞   he whispers.   ❝   &   i promise   ,   i’m uh   ,   i’m gonna make up for loss time. say the word   &   you got it   ,   ray. seriously. i owe you so much.  ❞

[actssassinmoved]

                      @derrycompass​ said : ❝ ayuh. ❞

❝   a   ------   wha   ?   ❞   eyebrows furrow for a moment as he ponders just exactly what it was eddie had said   ,   uncertain if it was something he meant to say or maybe it was one of those random slip of the tongue things. he does work lots of long hours   ,   after all. maybe he was just tired   ?   ❝  you uh   ,   you okay there   ,   eddie   ?   ❞   the aspiring actor asks   ,  head tilted to the side in pure curiosity mixed with mild concern.   ❝   did you just have a brain fart or something   ?   that didn’t even sound like an english word. are you speaking another language   ?   ❞

[actssassinmoved]

*nikolai lantsov   /   korezni !

hazel eyes are mesmerized     ,     watching as the scene unfolds itself .   riling his guard up was definitely not part of the arrangement     ,     even keeping barry in his private rooms is stretching it beyond the usual outdoor post at his door    (     but then again     ,     everyone agreed to be more thorough in what being the king’s personal guard meant     ,    ever since the nearly successful assassination attempt and since nikolai doesn’t have a valet around    )  .   but he genuinely likes having barry so close at hand     -     it does make him feel safer      ,     protected      ,     knowing that despite their little disputes the other would try to save him from whatever fate could try to claim him     ,     except for himself maybe     ,     but that is a given .   no one could keep the demons inside of him at bay     ,     but they quieten significantly in the other’s presence .  maybe fox likes to have him around because of the silence he brings anywhere he goes after being surrounded by so much noise for the rest of his life and with anybody else .   maybe there is more      -     there certainly is     -     but it is not to be dissected tonight .   barry’s hands around his feet keep him only slightly still    ,   eyes remaining on watching the american with rapt attention     ,    and a slow smile spreads over ruined face as the moment draws itself out    ,    them just looking at each other .   got you .    “  you really believe i can?  that i could?   no     ,     i can’t .   i shouldn‘t even dare .  anyone could tell you that i am not allowed to try anything with anyone     -    and    ,    yes    ,   because i am supposed to get married at one point .”  smile tilting a little to a downwards curve     ,    but only for a moment     ,    and tucking his feet in now under him    ,    withdrawing .    “ but i don’t have anyone to marry . and i am not like my father  .   or the men before me .   and if you don’t understand my advances as what they are     ,    i won’t go on with them .  although i do think you like what i’ve been doing    ,    moi rezku . ”

barry couldn’t deny how much he both hated   &   loved this moment that was unfolding before them  ,   a growing heat spreading to the back of his neck   &   face   ,   watching the king with more than just the careful eye of a guard meant to be having his six   ------   oh   ,   so much more. this game of theirs   ,   he believes   ,   is finally drawing to a close   ,   &   as much as the guard wants to think he’s strong enough to withhold himself from his enticing wiles   ,   he knows his need for love   ,   his need for touch would be his inevitable downfall. fuck fuches   &   what he’d think about this   ,   his mind ponders   ,   finding himself move slowly closer toward the king as he speaks   ,   piercing blue eyes melting as he finds himself closer   &   closer to him   ,   now only a foot away from him on the couch   ,   fingers tempted to move over   &   reach for him again   ,   but he doesn’t. if the king really wanted him   ,   wanted to make that move   ,   he’d leave it up to him to make the choice. barry had thrown the life preserver   ,   now it was up to nik to either take it or drown in his feelings for good.   ❝   no   ,   i   ,   uh   ------    i don’t. you’re too good to do that. i’ve seen you in action. you’re a true nice guy. even when we argue   ,   you’re always so fucking nice. it’s hard to be mad at you when you’re so charming   ,   you know.   ❞   even at this compliment   ,   barry can’t help the eye roll that comes so naturally   ,   followed by a heavy sigh. was he really   ,   really doing this   ?   was this a smart thing to be doing   ?   more than likely no   ,  but fuck all that   ,   right   ?   this won’t end well. he’s a king   &   you’re just a guard. an american. a man   ,   too. this won’t last. god   ,   even if all of that was true   ,   barry couldn’t resist the chance   ------   a chance at love   ,   something emotional   &   real.   ❝   i think i get it. i think   ------   i know what’s going on here between us.   ❞   barry finds himself looking down at the floor   ,   nerves suddenly rising as both hands grip at the edge of the couch   ,   trying not to sink too deep into how he feels for the other.   ❝   yeah   ,  okay   ,   so maybe i do   ,  you know   ,   like this. like you.   ❞   shit   ,   that sounds so awful   &   elementary   ------   obviously he’s not an expert at this whole revealing your feelings thing. focus   ,   berkman.   ❝   i like the nicknames you give me   ,   i like the way you flirt with me   &   how you always tease me a lot. ontop of all that   ,   you’re super nice   &   i   ------   i can’t help but think   ,   why me   ?   ❞   now he finally finds the courage to look up   ,   looking at nik with a curiosity   ,   desperate for him to answer the question that has been burning inside of him for weeks now.   ❝   you’re a great   ,   good lookin’ guy   ,  nik. you could have anyone. you don’t ... you don’t have to settle for someone like me.   ❞

[nightofthecreeps]

2015 Movie Awards: Winning is Everything in which Bill Hader looks really good while destroying a movie theater

+Bonus:

[actssassinmoved]

okay fuck it, like this for a cooking or baking short starter to be posted this week.

[actssassinmoved]

on a happier note   ,   because i missed the food conversation on here   ,   barry is a good sous chef to whoever is manning the kitchen. he’s very good at mincing   &   cutting up veggies   &   things   &   at a very quick pace.

[bareblockmoved]

the show must go on   !   ——   barry berkman   /   (   5 of   ∞   )

[actssassinmoved]

*elizabeth   /   cloudtorn !

he’s quiet - no, he’s always quiet, but this is different: this is silence. maybe it’s just been a long day, or a series of long days, compounded into one endless, exhausting march from place to place. time is an odd thing like that, and she supposes that everyone knows it, but in her case it’s hard not to be acutely aware. of course, the other option is that something is simply not right - and it feels intrusive to ask, but HEARTLESS to ignore it. it comes down to asking herself what barry would do in her position; the compassionate thing, probably. the kindest thing. it’s rare to say that about anyone else she knows - certainly when it comes to the people she’s trusted the most. “ um - ” elizabeth turns away from the kettle, looking at him sitting at the table over his coffee. she’s spoken up: she couldn’t take it back if she wanted to. “ is…is everything alright, barry? ”

@actssassin​

he realizes there’s a tension floating in the air between them   &   he was to blame for it. the day had been long   ,   that was for certain   ,   classes going on what seems like a lot longer than usual   ,   the teacher partnering barry up with someone he doesn’t particularly like   ,   but hey   ,   he can get through it   ,   right   ?   then they’re given their scene   ------   a goddamn military scene   ,   something from some movie   ,   saving private ryan or whatever.   &   barry doesn’t remember much of what happens next   ,   the bright   ,   burning theater lights blinding his vision as they get on - stage  ,   the distant echo of a familiar sound ringing in his ear   ,   the noise getting louder   &   louder   ,   as if greeting him like an old friend   ------   the desert wind.   CRACK   !   next thing barry knows   ,   he’s backstage in the dressing room   ,   blue eyes widening in shock when he realizes he had punched his fist into the thick glass mirror   ,   knuckles bleeding profusely as the sharp edges of the broken glass dig into his skin. what happened. shit   ,   what happened   ?   no   ,    he was doing better. he was doing so much better   ,   fuck   ,   why was he having these episodes again   ?   why was his brain fucking him up   &   making him go back to all this bullshit again   ?   barry was so sure all of the pain from his past life was behind him   ,   gone with the wind so to speak   ,   but here he was again   ,   a reminder of the man he once was. no   ,   not a man   ,   a monster.    &   here he thought he had a chance. yeah   ,   right. he didn’t deserve one. so lost in thought   ,   it takes barry a moment to finally look up at his roommate as she speaks   ,   her soft tone laced with concern   ,   yet there’s a hint of apprehension   ,   as if she was unsure if she should bother him at all. barry honestly doesn’t feel like talking   ,   but he doesn’t want to be an asshole   &   ignore liz completely. hell   ,  she still hasn’t even noticed his bandaged hand.   ❝   yeah   ,   yeah   ,   ❞   barry lies   ,  gaze never leaving his coffee mug   ,   the steam having disappeared from it ages ago.   ❝   i’m fine.   ❞

[actssassinmoved]

*nikolai lantsov   /   korezni !

the fire’s been burning in him ever since they kissed      ,      ever since his idea to keep the distance between them has been diminished by his own drunken foolishness .   ever since that kiss he could not think of anything else     ,    his days a mad haze of meetings on meetings and worried looks and the moment his and barry’s lips finally met after years of wanting nothing more     ,     after years of imagining a hundred and thousand different ways of how it could never happen and yet should happen     ,       all rendered down to this distraction .  he never wanted to let himself be burned like this      -      it is why he needed to draw back these past weeks after this true new year’s disaster     -    but then barry’s hands are on him again and all he does is burn .   catching flames in an instance .   he wonders how long it will take him this time to try and put them out before they can spread enough to find residence in his heart .  even when the american is cursing up a storm     ,      rightfully mad      ,      all nikolai can feel is the soft tug of longing in his stomach at the proximity .   who cares that they are at a state dinner     ,     that barry said he might potentially plan potential regicide     (     okay     ,     near-regicide     )      ,    that his royal guard should probably worry where he is being steered off to .   but all nikolai can think about how close they are again and how he has never wanted anything more .  how relieved he is that barry is touching him .    and he feels horrible enough for that alone .

the door falls closed and barry’s hand moves from his arm to his dress shirt     ,     crinkling it with the grip he has on it in the process     ,     and nikolai can‘t decide if he should be aroused by that or worried      -      probably both      ,    just to make sure all options are covered .  he likes to be thorough like that .   he doesn’t even have time to interject into the flurry of barry’s words    (    always talking     ,     always     ,    no matter the situation    )  and hazel eyes fixed on the first son widen once he is being pushed up against the wall of a particularly red room .    the prince didn’t even have time to take in the decor before barry already launched himself at him with a fierce rant     ,     with enough anger and nerve to outrank even the highest political figures     ,    and nikolai has the idiotic thought how much he      …      how much he loves this .   “   i am a terrible person      ,     i know this .    quite so .   i am sorry     -   ”    and then all the words die right in his throat as barry pushes up and into him and kisses him .   kisses him .   unlike nikolai’s own first move a month ago this lacks any restraint    ,     his hand being taken in a grip matching the fervor of barry’s hand on his shirt and being pushed against the wall behind him     ,      and he can’t keep the low moan from coming past his teeth as he leans in with open mouth .   it’s warm    ,    hot     ,    he is burning up for certain      -      and it is what has him break away for a moment with a wet sound     ,     looking away with incoming emberassment at himself when he gets his voice to speak    ,    rough as it may be  .   “  wait    ,    shouldn’t we    .    should we slow down?   have dinner first      ,     or something?”

it angers him so much to know that this kiss is everything he’s ever wanted   &   more   ,   unable to remember the last time he’s ever felt this alive before. it was like a fucking fire   ------   he was a blazing   ,   raging fire of both anger   &   passion   ,   fanning those flames onto the would be king   ,   flames that threatened to swallow them both whole. fuck   ,   let it   ,   barry thinks. let him burn me if that’s what it takes. it used to be that whenever he thought about the prince   ,   he wanted to barf at the possibility of having to talk to him   ,   having to be nice to him. now ever since that dreaded   (   delightful   )  new year’s kiss   ,   thinking about him was something he couldn’t control if he actually tried. his stupid face was always at the start of all his dreams   ,  those big   ,  hazel eyes always looking back at him in the tabloid articles sally would send him   ,  almost taunting him   ------   the one thing you want   ,   but can’t have. well   ,  he’s definitely claiming what he wants now   ,   nik’s bottom lip caught between his teeth as the prince follows into his motions   ,   kissing him back. shit   ,   he’s kissing him back. it’s everything   &   barry hates that as much as he loves it. fuck   ,   have they really been wasting all those years arguing with one another   (   more on barry’s part   ,   he has to admit   )   when they could have been solving their personal matters with their mouths   ?   or   ,   tongues as it seems   ,   barry letting a moan of his own leave his lips as he dives in to take another taste  ,   lips red   &   needy   ,   when   -------   shit   ,   why is he stopping   ?   why is he talking   ?   blue eyes widen in such surprise that the prince had the audacity to stop their little affair   ,   precious time being wasted on stupid words   &   then   ,   then he has the gall to ask if they should try   &   slow things down   ------   make things more formal.

                                                                barry is actually going to kill him.

❝  we just had dinner   ,   ❞   barry retorts slowly   ,   yanking the king away from the wall as he rolls his eyes. he’s almost tempted to laugh at the whole thing honestly. the whole scenario was like a ridiculous teen romantic comedy   ,   the cheesy kind from the mid nineties. he’d laugh   ,   sure   ,   if he wasn’t still ridiculously hot   &   bothered   ,   the fire burning at the pit of his stomach still ablaze.   ❝   nik   ,  just   ------   stop talking. we only have a few minutes.   ❞   icy blues melt a little as he takes a moment to regard him   ,   maybe a little amused   &   touched by his earlier words. he actually wants to wine   &   dine me   ,  the first son thinks.   &   yeah   ,  maybe at a later time   ,   he can do just that   ,   but for now   ?   barry leads him onto the table closest to them   ,   knocking off everything off of the surface so the ravkan heir could sit on it   ,   a mock throne of sorts. how fitting. behind him is a painting of alexander hamilton   ,   a song from the musical suddenly playing in his mind at the mere sight   ,   looking at the prince as it loops in his head   ------   boy   ,   you got me helpless   !   look into your eyes   &   the sky’s the limit   !   shit   ,   barry could kick himself for getting so in deep with that musical back when it first came out. he blames sally   ,   who made him sing it with him in car rides from when they were still packing up their homes in ohio   ,   all in n preparation to move into the white house with their parents. that felt like ages ago   ,   but he shouldn’t focus on that. right now he should be focusing on how good nik looked sitting there   ,   a needy look in his eyes   ,   one meant for him   &   him alone. damn   ,   that was a better sight than the painting behind him. with a hushed groan   ,   barry captures the prince’s lips in a much softer   ,   kinder kiss   ,   hands resting on either sides of his thighs   ,   feeling the smoothness of his dress pants   ,   the strong   ,  toned muscles underneath.   ❝   fuck   ,   i’m helpless   ,   ❞   the first son wheezes against his lips   ,   unaware that he’s said that aloud. down for the count   &   i’m drownin’ in ‘em   !