just gonna drop this here and skrt ... i will be over here from now on if u wanna write or chat or somethin !
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just gonna drop this here and skrt ... i will be over here from now on if u wanna write or chat or somethin !
hi people ! i’ve missed u all . i’m gonna try to get back in the swing of things , but i think i need a fresh start . with that being said , im gonna make a brand new account and start off new with a couple new muses , then go from there . if u would like to know the new account i will be moving to , please give this a like and i’ll send u the link when i make the account !
im not dead ya’ll ... im just a part time worker full time college student :(
okay ya’ll gonna tackle drafts tonight when i get off work , and i apologize in advance for being sooo bad with them lately :(
Breaking Free [x]
foolsongs.
though he wants desperately to let her leave, but the moment she turns to walk towards the door he’s reaching to catch her elbow to stall her. he’s unsure of what he’s going to say, still unsure how to come to terms with the fact that she was here within his grasp, let alone the fact that she was saying the things she was saying. it had him in two parts .. split down the middle in his feelings and torn up over the divide he felt within him. on one hand, even with the simplest touch of his fingers on her arm he wanted more .. ached to have more of her falling beneath the pads of his fingertips. on the other hand, his chest still ached from a wound she’d opened. ‘ i need you to .. ’ brody pauses, wrinkling his nose slightly for a moment. ‘ i need you to be more direct with me, ’ he’ll reach for her coat with his free hand, lifting it from her grasp easily and tossing it over his shoulder in another attempt to keep her near. ‘ i was happier with you, layla. i was, but .. ’ his dark eyes lower and he’ll exhale sharply in frustration. ‘ why are you doing this ? ’
she was a mess when it came to him . she cared for him so much it was almost painful ... or was period . she wanted him all for herself , on one hand . wanted to not care whether or not she was ruining his relationship , his feelings . but on the other hand , she hated hurting him . he was so good to her , no matter what she done to him , he would always be there to give her the shirt off of his back . she’d been playing with him for too long . she feels his hand graze her elbow and a shiver sends down her spine , turning around to face him . she listens to every word he says and theres a soft silence ... wondering what she could say , anything that’ll get her point across . anything that will prove to him she wanted him ... even if that meant crossing a line she never dared to cross again . she hesitates , but her hands move up to his face , her eyes looking into his ... the ones that she could get lost in a million times over . “ i love you . ” she speaks out , her voice shaking with every syllable . “ i know it sounds dumb , but i’m just so scared ... but --- i do , i ---- i love you . ”
foolsongs.
it’s impossible to hide her confusion, her full brows knitting together as she attempts to process the information. she couldn’t make sense of his words, couldn’t string them together to an end that she understood. ‘ i’m sorry but i .. i can’t control how i feel, ’ he’s still avoiding her gaze and she hates it, her voice wavering slightly before she swallows back the lump in her throat. ‘ i think i love you, ’ the words leave her lips buzzing, the tips of her ears searing with heat. ‘ and i can’t just turn it off. ’
he’s shocked that the girl has put up with his antics this long , considering he was the most confusing guy out there . he could blame his family for that ... turning him into someone who never actually knew what he wanted . he grits his teeth and looks down , shaking his head at her words . there’s nothing he can do now , he realized the danger too soon , and now it was too late . “ you ... can’t love me . ” he speaks up , as she can just flip a switch . he looks up to her , a smile seeping through his lips . “ i’m the worst person to love . ”
foolsongs.
he should’ve expected it would go this way, and when the realization hits he will hang his head slightly and heave out a sigh. her laughter is cold and he understands, can feel the hurt he’s causing her now and hates it but knows he’d only hurt her worse in the long run. this was the moment —— a bandaid ripping off, the sting that comes after. out of the corner of his eyes he can see her arms cross over her chest and he’ll lift his gaze to hers. it takes everything in him not to correct her, not to tell her how much he needed her, how intensely he felt the same. when his lips part next it’s all lies be believed to be to her benefit in the long run. she really would be so much better off without him as an anchor. ‘ alright, fine, ’ he inhales, gaze darting to the left and lowering before he looks at her again, ‘ i don’t feel the same, ana. ’
if she tried to put into words the pain she felt in her body in that moment , she would be put into a hospital . the worst pain , a heart being ripped out of your chest , stomped on ... threw around like a damn baseball at a ball game . a toy by a six year old child being bounced off the walls in a household , like it was nothing . she felt like nothing . she chokes out a breath , looking down as her mouth opened agape . she asked him ... made him tell her this . and yet as soon as he does , she regrets it instantly . the truth is like a harsh reality ... there was nothing there . and yet she retaliates , a tear falling down her eye . her hard head quickly wipes it away , hoping to god he doesn’t see the vulnerable state she’s found herself in . she looks up to meet his gaze , blinking slowly . “ the night you rescued me , took me home and waited for me to be okay ... and even when i swore i was you still stayed . ” she’s rambling , mostly to herself . “ all the morning coffee runs you’d take for me . getting me a bagel even when i told you i didn’t want one . you knew i did . ” she sniffles , a sad smile folding against her lips . “ the night you said you cared about me more than anything . it was all a lie . ” she backs up slowly from him , wiping another tear before it could even fall . “ go to hell . ” she spits , turning around and walking to her car , getting in her jacket to try to desperately find her keys before she has to look at him one more second .
foolsongs.
‘ it broke your heart to see me alone while you were with someone else ? ’ she questions quickly, single eyebrow raising, poised to listen to his next onslaught of aching words. she had tried to grow colder to him since the night to which he was referring, but it was hard to deny that he knew her well .. and he was painfully right about his accusation. she DID care about him, more than she cares to admit and maybe m o r e than she’d felt for anyone else, and she would not have let him in if she didn’t. she feels bare, armor stripped away as as stood across from him and chewed incessantly on her lesser lip —— a terrible nervous habit. her hands flexed open and then closed into fists as she attempted to appear like she was confident, in charge. and then, just in the moment where she felt she could regain her senses .. his confession rocked her. it took a long time to digest after it had left his lips, her eyes growing wide slightly before she managed to tear her gaze away from his. sabrina felt no pressure to fill the silence, though it was torturous to some and torturous now, perhaps, to the male in her company. ‘ greyson, you .. don’t mean that, ’ it’s a solemn resignation when she finally speaks, for despite how badly she wanted to believe him she couldn’t stomach the thought of being hurt again —— of being hurt by him again, of seeing him with someone else.
he looks at the ground , his heart beating out of his chest . she’s right , why would it break him to see her alone , when he was just finishing with another girl a day after they ended things ? it wasn’t a smart rebuttal , one that would leave him six feet under . he sighs , shrugging his shoulders . “ yes ... sabrina . as fucking stupid as that sounds , it broke me . ” it was time to speak the truth out loud , to where he had no going back . he could lay it all out on the line . but was he really ready to be fully vulnerable with her ? she would have all the power , something that scared the shit out of him . he could tell her everything he feels , and she could shoot him down before he even finished his sentence . his eyes looked up at hers in the uncomfortable silence , wondering more than anything what she was thinking . did he have a chance ? he’d never know . “ i do ... you’re the best fucking thing that’s ever happened to me . ” he lets out a quick breath , licking his lips softly . “ i’m fucked up , i make dumb choices . but i only do it because i’m ---- fucking terrified to put it all on the line . ” he doesn’t even know if she comprehends what he means , but that’s as much as she’s going to get out of him now .
dcvious.
in his point of view . the female’s rebellion does not warrant to anything . she lives in a beautiful home with people paid to make sure she is safe . the ungratefulness the oozes in every pore of her fantastic skin is remarkable . never in his life had he met someone so ungrateful until her . all his father wants is for her to be safe . she responds to this kindness by being nothing but a shallow little bitch . firing the gun inside an enclosed space may lead to a fatal accident . he did not want a life to be taken because of a privilege little girl who wouldn’t come home . if he had to drag her out of the bar —— then so be it . he just hopes that in the process she gets bruised so at least he can leave a scar that can immortalize him in her life . a cruel farewell gift of his to her . “ listen here you ungrateful little fucking cunt ! ” he snapped at her . he tried his best to keep his patience , but everyone has their limit . without hesitation , he grabbed the female by the neck of her clothing . he was surely going to lose his job after this night anyway —— might as well make it worth it . “ you can tell whatever story you want to tell your father about me . i don’t give a damn but you are going home . you’ll be on that fucking bed of yours and if i have to tie you on it then so be it ” he snarled at her . “ your father is the most important man in this country . no one cares about you . you can whore yourself out if you want but until your father is in that office , we unfortunately have to keep your selfish ass safe for him not for you . because when something bad happens to you . you’ll be burdening everyone . all because you can’t go out and party . you cry and moan about not attending parties while your dad sits and worry about millions of crises and problem this country faces . instead of helping him and thanking him for giving you a life only most could dream you do this shit . ” perhaps he defended the president a little too much .
she doesn’t understand how she got herself into this situation ... she understands her fathers lifestyle , and she’s more than proud of him for what he has accomplished . all she wanted was for him to be happy after so much shit has filled their lives . her mother leaving , him going through woman after woman and one right after another breaking his heart like he was nothing . he was finally content with his life , and she was happy knowing he was . although it was hard telling him how hard she had it , how anything she done was ridiculed no matter how perfect she tried to make herself . sometimes all she wanted was to have a normal life and be able to go to parties and be with her friends without getting hounded about shit she didn’t even know about . she stops in her tracks when he yells out , her back turned to him as nothing but rage filled her bones . she had never felt so unbelievably chaotic except when it came to him , he drove her absolutely crazy and in the worst way possible . her mouth opens when he turns her around and grabs the top of her shirt , her eyes staring into his . she listens to every word he says and she feels like burning a house down . she doesn’t hesitate to rear back , her hand connecting with his cheek in a fit of rage . “ you listen to me , you inconsiderate , ruthless bastard . ” she connects her hands to his chest , pushing him back . “ you don’t know a fucking thing about me , or my father . you work for us , not the other way around . ” she steps forward to him and pushes him again , his back hitting a wall which she hates . “ i don’t have to explain my reasons to you , and you have no damn idea what it’s like to live the life i do . on your side , it’s all glitz and glamour . oh the poor girl can’t get drunk a couple times , boo hoo . and you can loathe me all you want , i don’t give a shit . ” now it’s her who grabs his collar , pulling him to her . “ but you will never , ever ... ridicule me when you don’t know the first thing about me . ”
gonna try to get a couple things done tonight , but im so exhausted so im gonna watch a lil’ netflix until i get in the mood :)
fadcdaway.
‘ you came here to set me straight … keep me from blabbing about this ? ’ there’s no stopping the chuckle that follows. ‘ sure that’s all ? ’
“ yes , i am . look , no one can know about this ... my whole reputation will be ruined . ” his face is straight and serious , hoping she would get the message . “ yes , that’s all . ”
fadcdaway.
‘ you know we’re alone right ? you can lay off the attitude , stop being such a bitch. nobody is around to prove anything to and i already know you hate me. ’ gaze stays focused on the road ahead , pushing the vehicle into drive and easy out into traffic. ‘ yeah … where am i taking you ? ’ praying wherever it may be it was close.
she lets out a sigh , a chuckle passing her lips . “ i don’t know if you are smart enough to realize this ... but if i hate you , then i’m gonna be a bitch . sooner you realize that the better . ” a scoff leaves her lips , looking over at him before looking at the road . “ harrington apartment building . i’ll give you gas money or whatever when you drop me off , cause i know you ain’t doing this for free . ”
fadcdaway.
‘ if that were the case than why are you here ? ’
“ because i know you’ve been saying stuff ... i’m here to set the record straight . ”
fadcdaway.
‘ please don’t make me regret coming. i figured if you were reaching out it must have been serious , just get in the car. ’
“ wow ... such a gentleman . ” she rolls her eyes , stepping into the car as she pushes her sleeves over her hands , looking out the window . “ thanks anyways ... i guess . ”
“ why would you come and rescue me of all people ? we hate each other . ”