沁

matters of the heart.

[aeharts]

how do you go from

nothing

to everything?

poetry

and words.

always,

and always.

[aeharts]

i have come to realise that i had found strength in the quiet and in the nature. and it came to me in the form of poetry.

i thought i would give up poetry after all these years, but i couldn’t.

[aeharts]

our body fit into one like every love story to be written. 'where have you been?' 'where you are.' in every poem, and every song

[aeharts]

Today, there is the rain that reminds me of the sadness lingering on my chest. I can’t remember the words he had said, or the words I was supposed to say. I’m starting to forget his eyes, the way he used to look at me. They say, light a candle and read a book. I’m praying that this scent and this fiction, could lead me back to you.

rebacca g.

[aeharts]

i. waking up to see the golden in the sky, and knowing that the colours shine a little different each day.

ii. some days i hear silence, other days when i listen closely enough, i hear the birds chirping at daylight.

iii. finding my words, again.

[aeharts]

you are slowly teaching me that love is both sunday morning and friday night. shoulder kisses trailing down, and your arms over mine when the sun rise. it’s the rendition you were playing -- listening to your favourite song while i hold my favourite book. it’s burnt cookie on cheat days, and porridge on sick days. 

it’s the smudged paints on our make-believe autumn. the leaves so green, we wanted it red. 

it’s being trapped by the rain and running drenched home. It’s our search for the moon, having the clouds hid it, and finding the time to try again, and again. 

it’s shouldering the weight of my family. It’s bystanders watching you search for my tenderness, and wilderness. it’s calling me out from my hiding place, and knowing that when i feel overwhelmed, i hear you calling my name. 

It’s my real life moving like a movie when you wipe away the tears rolling down my cheek. it’s your heart breaking the same time mine did. 

it’s going through the messiness of the world, and knowing that as long as i fall asleep next to you, i will be fine. 

[aeharts]

All these new feelings —

I think I got lucky.

[aeharts]

I hope you keep your courage close to your heart, even when it hurts to breathe. 

[aeharts]

In my dream, we were in love.

[aeharts]

I let your courage seep into me, just for a little while. It is like stepping out to feel the warmth of the sun, after far too long.

[aeharts]

i. the resilience i have built up over the years ii. the calming effects of meditation - the finding back of my center  iii. the longing for people and places

[aeharts]

what i love about being human, is that we grow softer through love.

[aeharts]

There was a time when I healed myself, when this darkness was only about me and in passing. I have grown quiet, my heart broke inwards, the world felt like a painful place and I waited until midnight when it had gone softer. The lights, the cars, and only the cats. No one was speaking and no one could hurt me.

[aeharts]

[aeharts]

The world feels like a catastrophe. I’m too busy to know you. We vomit out the nasty, and hide all the beautiful things. Words became wordless and had lost their meaning. To life, to love, to the little happiness we cannot achieve. 

My thoughts are jumbled and I’m angry, at myself, at the hurt, at the loneliness of this pain. 

I wish you had listened. 

[aeharts]

[aeharts]

his voice. his smile. waking up next to him. his hand in my hair. looking into his eyes. the tingling happiness of being in his arms. his laugh. his love. the way he explores my body. his spontaneity. his calmness. his kindness. his firmness. his sensitivity, and the wave of comfort he gives.