Makwe Manis.

september 15.

[afidaothman]

"No- no, I don't regret it."

[afidaothman]

#14

Things seems different right now. And yes, I come here to ‘bebel’ bout things in my head and what I feel inside 😅

Ada benda kita tak rasa nak share dekat orang. But then, bila kita rasa nak share something, ada pulak tak kena dengan orang nie dengan orang tu. End up, kita diam pendam sensorang 😔

I know I don’t have someone special like you guys. I know I don’t have anything to give in return for some help.

Hm, betol la orang cakap. Sekeras keras hati kita, sabar banyak mana pun, akan ada perasaan yg terlalu sensitif dalam hati kita even benda tu bukan la something yg kita perlu rasa nak berkecil hati dengan orang.

But I don’t know why I am being so sensitive inside me 😔 Penat awak. Dah lama sangat rasa simpan. Dah lama sangat. Yee, dah lama sangat since kita belasan tahun lagi. But I choose to buat tak tahu je.

Dari kecik sampai dah besar, kita always being together. Nak pegi situ sini, kerja sana sini, bercerita itu ini, nangis marah gaduh, semua ada.

But, now everything dah lain. Awak pun dah tak cari sy kalau nak bercerita, dah tak cari sy kalau nk pergi mana2, dah tak cari sy dulu kalau nk apa2. Sy dah jadi the last one untuk awak cari. Itu pun kalau awak rasa nk cari. Hm, I don’t know why sy nak kena jadi childish macam nie 😔

When I have something to bercerita benda yg happy or sad things, yee awak ada untuk sy but the respond is not so interesting at all. But it’s still okay with me.

You will be someone’s soon. Sisa waktu yg ada nie pun awak dah tak cari sy. I’m so sad.

Sorry for being so childish today.

😔😔😔😔😔

[afidaothman]

Boy-friends 👬

[afidaothman]

Boy-friends

I have a lot of them. But it doesn’t mean I’m flirting with them.

Lelaki. Kalau diorang selesa dengan kita (perempuan), diorang akan stay dengan kita, suka hangout, suka mintak pendapat, and so on.

Since I have a lot of boy-friends, I knew perwatakan diorang macamana.

A few of them already have a girlfriend or ada someone special yg duk call or text everyday but still berkawan with the other girls. It’s not flirting. Kalau diorang dah selesa, diorang will stay as a bestfriend yg akan share everything with each other.

Diorang akan tau batas diri masing2. Lelaki nie macam perempuan jugak. Perempuan pun ada kawan lelaki yg dia baik, yg duk share everything. So, it’s fair la. But tak semua pasangan macam nie.

My friends cakap, diorang bukan nak flirting sangat pun. Bukan tak sayang girlfriend. It’s just nak berkawan. Dan yg third party tu, jangan la perasan sangat the guy nak ngorat kita. Hahaha. Nie datang lelaki nk berkawan terus cop nak flirting. Ohh, come on 😅

Kalau diorang stay berkawan and tetiba share everything ke kita, it’s mean diorang selesa dengan kita. Kita nie pulak pandai2 la kawal diri.

Tak salah kalau tetiba tersuka kat kawan sendiri but kalau kita tau dia dah ada someone, please stop. Bukan stop berkawan, but just stay as a good friend. Diorang cari kita sebab diorang selesa dengan kita. Letak perasaan tu ke tepi, insyaAllah lama2 perasaan tu hilang.

Since I have a lot of boy-friends yg macam nie, I did learned how to understand about guys.

But like I said, tak semua pasangan boleh terima kalau boyfriend diorang duk text dengan kawan perempuan diorang.

p/s: Tak semua lelaki sama perangai macam nie. This is all about my boy-friends around me and I know how they are 😊

[free-your-mind]

[free-your-mind]

[afidaothman]

Yeahh! You can't 🍃

[staypozitive]

[afidaothman]

I am trying. Yes, i did 🍃

[staypozitive]

[afidaothman]

#13

Xtau kenapa perlu fikir. Xtau kenapa rasa sedih. Hm, penat nk kena ada perasaan macam nie 😔

[afidaothman]

🙂🙃

[afidaothman]

It's hurt. Always.

[afidaothman]

#12

Hm. Penat la fikir pasal awak and I am still don’t get it why sy kena fikir.

Ada masa sy terima, sy redha. But ada masa you still there 😔 and sy rindu semua yg manis before I knew bout it. It’s annoying 😞

Everyone can say, “Dah2 la tuu. Stop it. It’s not worth it. Fikir diri sendiri pulak, stop fikir pasal orang lain.”

Sy mampu senyum je and anyone can say they know how I feel. But please, understand me. It’s not easy to move on again. How stupid I am 😓

I know it’s not even worth it! But still … *sigh*

And still tak faham why I need to cry bout this shit when I think of it. It's just happened. Sakit dia lain macam. Macam orang frust bercinta. Fcuk!

[afidaothman]

#11

I did said, “bodoh mende aku nak kacau bf orang!”

And. Now I need to realize that, he’s everything when we share every moments before he's someone's . But no longer from now on. He’s already someone’s.

Just walk away. Friends is always be friends.

[afidaothman]

#10

Hm. I guess you really did that to me. It's okay. Don't try to make me feel amazed by how you treat me like before. I won't fall for you again.

[afidaothman]

[afidaothman]

[afidaothman]

#9

Bila aku cakap suka, memang aku suka sungguh. Bila ada respond, makin aku suka.

Bila makin dilayan, dari suka boleh jadi sayang. Aku pun tak tau how boleh jadi sayang.

Tak ke sayang namanya bila aku rasa sakit sangat kat hati nie. Rasa sakit yg macam orang putus cinta tu. Hek eleh. Hurmmm

Kalau boleh, aku nak bagitau semua apa yg aku rasa but we’re just more than friends and not more than in relationship status.

Sungguh. Aku suka ikhlas dari hati. Tiap doa aku sebut nama dia. Mungkin sebab tu, lama-lama dari suka jadi sayang. I guess. Hurmmm

Ikhlas dari hati.