after the rain goes @afterxthexrainxgoes-blog - Tumblr Blog

::: Hi guys. Yes I’ve disappeared off the face of the earth, pretty much. I can’t really handle an rp schedule. This is stressful and the longer I was away from rping, the less pain I was in. No stress about worrying over who to rp with...no worries about too many/too little replies or the content of... My muse is in my mind and louder than ever... But I can really only rp when the feeling strikes me. Once that’s done, I have to rest and for long periods. Profound disability doesn’t work with tumblr’s view of rp. So...I can’t rp on here. I have a skype and my muses are all alive on there for as formal or as informal of an rp experience as possible. But that’s it. I didn’t really want to believe it, but that’s it. I can’t do this to myself if I want to feel better. So time to make an another adjustment for myself. Thanks for many wonderful years. Cherise and Archie are still happily married and the kids are fine. If anything, they’re probably enjoying some quiet time. :::

Warning: This character reacts in realistic ways to realistic situations. There will be no exceptions made just because you like a character, have headcanons, or “have a connection” to the character you play”. If this is a situation that would horrify my character, then oh goodness, they are horrified. If you’re going to harm someone they love, expect them to act accordingly. This may or may not conflict with what you feel is canon. But guess what? I appreciate a tiny bit of realism instead of favoritism. Caution: Realism Within Acceptable Limits. If this is not acceptable, perhaps you should only play with fans of your character. You will not disguise your powerplaying as an opinion.

#out of wings #ooc

::: Yeah I ended up adding a rule for character stanning. Because frankly, I hate character stanning and I wanna murder you like a hired ninja if I see you stan for a character. I use -stan ironically when I come to a character’s defense... But honest to god if I see anyone try to make an excuse for a character who would do twenty five to life and “BUT HE’S REALLY INNOCENT CAUSE HIS GOLDFISH DYING WHEN HE WAS TWO LEFT HIM SO EMOTIONALLY SCARRED”, I am going to consume your soul for the wheelchair gods, okay?

It’s what you all sound like. IT’S LITERALLY WHAT Y’ALL SOUND LIKE! Mmkay. Well I’m gonna eat and then maybe we can bait my creativity out. :::

#out of wings

::: I already don’t get a lot of rp due to health and being selective, but...things in the fandom are really bothering me. Stupid question, but should I make some more things very explicit in my rules since I can’t trust this fandom? :::

#out of wings

::: Hey. Still here. Migraine is going on and off because we’ve finally hit summer and the weather is realizing it’s supposed to stay warm. I’m sorry I’m really cruddy with my patterns of writing, but you know what? Kind of happy those of you I do owe are patient and you understand I’m disabled and have health problems. I’m GLAD. Heard the news that OUAT is going back to their original format and Archie is returning. Not sure if it’s full time but um... Wonder if ABC’s buckling down on the shows bleeding the most viewers... I’m not gloating. I’m just finding it ironic because I did warn this would happen. I just didn’t think it would be as soon as S6! :::

#out of wings

::: Mom: So how do you feel? Me: Ugh. Weather migraine. Was hoping to make mac and cheese but I can’t focus like this. Can I get some help? Mom: Sure. SCREEEEEEE FANCY PANTS MAC AND CHEESE!

:::

#out of wings

afterxthexrainxgoes-blog

Pint-Sized

thecursedspinnerofold

That made him feel a bit better. She wasn’t going to keep him. And she’d give him a light if he needed it. Though he’d been made fun of for that before so…. “I don’t need it. During the day.” It was just at night that he got scared of the dark, of the chance that the shadow would creep up on him and take him away again. Maybe that had already happened though. Maybe that was how he ended up here. He didn’t know. And he didn’t want to think about that.

Instead he followed the woman inside the gate. He was still cautious of course, but the promise of food had him brightening just a tad. Now that he thought of it he was hungry. But taking food from others was bad. Wouldn’t she need it to eat?

Still, she didn’t seem that scary, so he followed slowly, watching her as though half sure that she’d turn and try to grab him at any moment. And then she asked his name. His instinct was to not tell her, but they were in a different place. So what everyone at home didn’t like him? She probably didn’t know of him.

But… maybe not giving a name was a good idea. In case she did want to keep him for some reason. He also didn’t know what she meant about being told about this place, but he didn’t ask. She thought he’d been told. Best not to be out of place. Those out of place were made fun of.

“Miss Maia,” he repeated, opting for that option cause it was more polite. “You can call me Spindle.” So she’d have a name and all. Plus he liked it. It had to do with spinning.

afterxthexrainxgoes-blog

Spindle wasn’t a child’s name. It wasn’t a name at all! Of course, some children weren’t comfortable with names. She didn’t say it had to be a real name, after all. With a sly and knowing smile, Cherise confirmed with a nod and let the boy inside the house. “Spindle,” she repeated to herself and committed it to memory. It would be hard to forget. All she had to do was look for a child who wasn’t her own! “Well, don’t worry about that. You don’t have to leave the house if you don’t want to... Plenty of night lights so you can see and keep the dark away. Flashlight if you want that!” Cherise returned to the subject of shadows. Children were afraid of the dark, but sometimes the dark took on unique forms. If you were a child in need, the dark could be that much more desperate of a place to be lost in. Sometimes, having a light was the only thing to draw some hope from. She had immediately gone off into the kitchen and had ducked into the fridge. Scrambled egg, bacon, and some sausage links had been removed from a small container and emptied into a skillet. With a little bit of butter, Cherise had started to warm up the food (and return a bit of the flavor) to it. “Biscuit or toast? The biscuits are still fresh. I can have toast for you in a moment.” The pan hissed as the food snapped and bubbled inside. It only took a very short moment and Cherise had the offering on a plate. This was, after all, her job. Look after the children. Look after children that weren’t her children. She did everything with that gentle smile, trying to urge her little visitor that this was okay. “If you’re still hungry, I can make more! Plenty of eggs. Nana did a bit of shopping for me.” She winked, then giggled. “I hardly get out. I’m too busy looking after people. But if you want something, just ask me. Or Nana... Or Archie. Or one of the older children here. Don’t bother asking the little ones. They can’t talk yet!”

#ic #thecursedspinner #storybrooke #STEALS BABY RUMPLE #nope sorry cherise is stealing every deaged character out there sorz

heroicallybelieving

For a second, Henry wasn’t quite sure why Cherise had paused. Maybe he shouldn’t have asked yet. Maybe, like Emma, she hadn’t been ready to hear that he wanted her to take on a role as his mother. She already kind of was though, she just hadn’t realized it. “Well, yeah, I suppose I do kind of have a collection. If you’d accept, I’d have two and a half moms. Regina’s the half.” That probably sounded mean, but right now it didn’t even seem like she wanted to be his mom. Saying she was half a mom was kind of giving her a lot of credit. “That’s a lot more than most kids get. I guess I’m kind of lucky with that.”

He was smiling, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes until she said she didn’t mind being his mom. “Thanks Miss Cherise!” He was hugging her again, this time pretty tightly. He didn’t really envision much changing. She was still going to take care of him. The only thing that was really going to change was that they both were accurately describing the role she had in his life; that was all. “Maybe … maybe I could just call you Cherise for now? I don’t think Regina would be happy if she heard me calling you mom. But that doesn’t mean you aren’t one. I call Emma and Regina by their first names about half the time,” he admitted. “It … just means a lot that you want to.”

He listened to her talk, a small smile on his face. It was good to help her get her memories back. “Yeah, you were really happy, before the curse. It took you a while to find Jiminy, but once you did, you guys were happy. Before the curse, at least.” Henry didn’t feel like getting into the more painful parts of her past, but she was kind of insisting by her train of questions. “Well, I mean, it was. That was how the curse works. I don’t know why you didn’t get your memories back though. That part doesn’t make sense. But, the curse was designed to make everyone really unhappy, especially people who had a good life before. That’s why it separated you from Archie. But, why you can’t remember … I think that might have more to do with before you met Archie. You’d have to ask him though. The book doesn’t say much about that.” What it had said was that her past was too dark for a children’s book. Which … when it had left in things like murder, Henry wasn’t quite sure how it could be worse. Unless, of course, it was similar to whatever his mom had done to Graham. That had been left out too. Henry still wasn’t sure what terrible thing had happened though.

“I don’t mind, really,” he protested as he said she should be playing. “I want to be a knight, right? Well, knights help those in need. I’m just not as good at it as Archie would be, but if I’m helping, then I’m more than happy too. Of course, an extra milkshake wouldn’t hurt,” he said, a teasing grin on his face at the end to lighten things a bit. Whether or not the conversation had actually gotten dark, his mind had gone there, and he’d like to stop thinking about it. Maybe that was why she couldn’t remember; whatever had happened before she’d met Archie was so painful that she didn’t want to remember. If that was the case, Henry kind of hoped she never completely remembered her past. Hopefully she could just the good stuff with Jiminy and Geppetto and Pinocchio, not whatever happened before.

afterxthexrainxgoes-blog

It didn’t matter what Henry called her. It mattered what the boy felt. It mattered what he wanted. He wanted her to be there, so Cherise was obligated to stay. She wanted to be in that place. If Henry told her she wasn’t overstepping her boundaries, then she wanted to listen to him. She wasn’t going to trust Regina’s judgement with such a thing. If Henry wanted her, she would be there. If Henry called her at midnight, she was going to roll out of bed. If he called her while she was hooked up to dialysis, she was going to unhook the tubes from her own arm and head off in the direction that he needed her to be in. It seemed obsessive, but she’d give that promise to any child she was the mother of. Flesh and blood or heart and soul, she would give everything. There was some sort of insult to know she had been happy at one point in her life. It wasn’t some passing happiness, but a deep and contented happiness with something that was permanent or even longer. There was a reason for her to hate the curse now more than ever. She could only wonder what the book had left out, but perhaps Archie did remember what had happen. Or maybe she’d be left in her ignorance. If this curse was meant to punish people who were happy, it was probably only her with the key to this memory and it was stopping everything else. This was already stressful just to suggest such, even if she hadn’t said it aloud! “Milkshake it is,” Cherise chuckled softly to herself, though she didn’t know if she was in much of a joking mood anymore. She kept at a leisurely pace now that she was sure Regina couldn’t chase her down and try to bite her like a rabid dog. Her eyes kept on Henry while they moved along the sidewalk and she hummed as Granny’s came into view. “Henry, you know that knight thing you talk about? I worry about that. You’ve talked about that since you were in my class... You know knights get hurt in battle, right?”

#ic #storybrooke #thebelievingauthor

afterxthexrainxgoes-blog

Pint-Sized

thecursedspinnerofold

He wasn’t really very sure what had happened. Or where he was. Or where the spinners were. Or why the road and… and well everything looked so different from what he was used to. It was confusing, overwhelming. And he was just mostly sure that he’d been somehow abandoned by the spinners when he thought they had cared about him. Which made him want to cry.

Only babies cried though. That’s what the older boys said. The ones who always called him a coward and a thief even though he’d never done anything to them. So he didn’t cry. He forced the tears back as he wandered around, trying to figure out where in the realms he could possibly be.

He turned quickly when he heard the voice, seeing a woman there. He as a bit scared of her, but she kneeled so she was his size. That made her less scary. And she said here was safe. He wasn’t sure he believed that. He never felt safe, except with the spinners.

But there really was no other way for him to figure out anything.

So he approached her slowly, still very cautious. Most adults never liked him. Most people total really. So he didn’t trust her. After being left by his father, it wasn’t really in his nature to trust anyone, and being in a strange land wasn’t helping that tendency one bit.

“Safe?” he asked to be sure as he stopped, closer but still out of her reach. Just in case. “No shadows? And no keeping me if I want to leave?” Because he’d heard stories of kids being taken by mean men and he didn’t want that to happen to him.

afterxthexrainxgoes-blog

Those sounded like the usual questions. This was normal. They always seemed afraid of something chasing them and they always seemed worried she’d keep them stuck there. It was probably some fear of the home they were currently living in. “You may come and go as you please...and if you are worried about shadows, I will give you a light to protect you.” Though, probably not a candle. A candle seemed rather dangerous. The boy seemed too young to be wielding an open flame. Cherise held open the gate for the child with a soft smile. “If you’re hungry, I can warm up breakfast. We finished eating a bit ago, but I don’t mind. If you would like something, you need only just ask.” It was always strange to Cherise when smaller children arrived at her house, but she learned not to question it. They were merely beings from stories. Things happened. Thing came to pass. Things were realized. They just lived out their lives in the broken remains of a curse. She quietly walked back towards the house and hummed softly as she hopped up the stairs. Her short song stopped as she looked back to the boy. Dare she offer her hand? He looked skittish and like he mistrusted her. She couldn’t blame him if something terrible had happened to him before. “Little one, do you have a name you like to be called? You don’t have to tell me...but you can call me Cherise. Some call me Miss Maia. I’ll help you, don’t worry. I don’t know who told you about me, but you’ll be alright now!” Cherise kept her voice low and soothing while keeping a kind gaze on the boy. If she had never seen this lost little soul, then where exactly had he come from?

#ic #thecursedspinner #storybrooke

Pint-Sized

@thecursedspinner

Cherise hadn’t taught in what felt like years. Was it years now? How long since the triplets had been born? They’d be starting school, now... Since their birth was when she had taken her leave of absence from school. She hadn’t the energy to keep up with a full class of over twenty or so students, but a crew of about nine or so children with assorted ages were easier. Yet time to time, she still took in “strays”. That’s what they called them. She preferred the term children. Children who were lost, children who couldn’t rely on their parents. If they needed a place for just a night or needed a reliable place for meals and to do homework, that’s what the Hopper Household was for. Pushing the gate open and eyeing a child she had never seen before, she was curious. There was messy dark honey hair and he didn’t appear to be looking at her. “Hey uh... Are you...” It was still morning and she still had leftover biscuits, bacon, and other assorted breakfast goodies she remembered to save in case the smaller children wanted a snack. But those morsels might be going to someone else today... She beckoned calmly and crouched down. “If you’re looking for a safe place, it’s right here. C’mon.” To Cherise, this was a routine. This was the safe place. This was the place that gave out food and blankets. If Storybrooke didn’t want to work on this problem, then she would. So many stories had their own run-ins with evil step parents. Some were just regular parents willing to wreck a child’s life in the name of some selfish gain. Someone had to be willing to step up. Someone was usually Cherise.

#thecursedspinner #storybrooke #ic

::: Hi. Haven’t been feeling amazing lately and I have kept a migraine away for a full 24 hours. :D So um. Expect me to answer some drafts soon! :::

#out of wings

::: Fix one thing, have another thing happen! My head’s being pretty bad. Now... Normally I can work on this, but I haven’t been able to hold down real food in...a day in a half. I’m not functioning. I’m not. S’not good. Head’s killing me. The only thing keeping this at bay is caffeine. I’m dying here (of pain). I’m so sorry for finking (lol red and green finkrat what old fandom am I in) out on everyone. :( I don’t mean to. It’s just... pain. Pain sucks and I become a pretty horrible person when I’m in pain. :::

#out of wings

::: In a little bit of pain from stress. I’ll be okay. Just suddenly very slow. Nothing that happened on here. It’s all IRL stuff. Not sure when it’ll stop.

I am supposed to get my nieces here on Saturday but I don’t know yet. I may not know until the day of. Forgive my sudden slowness. :::

#out of wings

punchbackandsaythisiswhoiam-dea

Crying Wolf

punchbackandsaythisiswhoiam-dea

It hadn’t taken long for her to call Sneezy and tell him to bring someone and guard the Hopper house. He’d agreed without asking any questions. As for Archie, his phone had gone to voicemail. Emma was both relieved and guilty that this meant she didn’t have to tell him herself. Instead he’d hear it all at one time, and wouldn’t be able to interrupt when she told him Cherise was being arrested. He could hear why first, and that Emma was going to do everything in her power to prove Cherise innocent.

As soon as the calls were over, Emma slipped into the driver seat of the car. “Sneezy’s on his way. He’ll watch the house for you. He’s going to bring one of his brothers too,” Emma promised. “They’ll make sure your kids are safe.” She looked so miserable. Not that Emma could blame her, she’d be miserable too. If only she could comfort Cherise in some way. Emma wasn’t too great at that though.

She started to drive off, going slowly as if Cherise being in the car necessitated greater care. “Don’t worry. I’m not going to let anyone hurt your kids, or you.” Emma may not be great at comforting, but she was good at protecting, and if anyone tried to hurt the Hoppers any more than they already were hurting, they would pay.

afterxthexrainxgoes-blog

She was being treated like precious cargo and while that was nice of Emma, it was also becoming an agonizing trip. She wanted to vomit. She wanted to peel her skin off. There were a million little actions of pain she could inflict upon herself as a way to make herself realize that she was still alive and this wasn’t some terrible nightmare. Cherise felt mildly comforted knowing that any second, she’d have at least two dwarves watching her house. At least Emma took her seriously when she was fearing the worst. Emma believed in her when she said this was the work of someone very dark and would do anything to see her hurt. “Please drive the speed limit, Emma. I’d like to get there before sun up,” She croaked as her eyes were fixated outside the window in a dead, broken, and soulless stare. The promises were kind. The actions were kind... But it did nothing for her. It couldn’t ease her mind. It was just a tiny bit of comfort that, in the end, could hardly do anything at all. If this was who she thought it was, they could probably find a way around this.

#ic #storybrooke #punchbackandsaythisiswhoiam

punchbackandsaythisiswhoiam-dea

Being a Parent | Cherise and Emma

This Thanksgiving had been the nicest Emma had ever had. It was one of the few where she actually felt thankful. She was thankful the Hoppers had invited her and Henry over for the meal, and that both Cherise and Archie could make Henry feel so happy. At the same time, she couldn’t help but feel a bit jealous of Cherise. Emma knew it was ridiculous. Henry could love Cherise and still love her too. Yet, Cherise was so much better at being a mother than Emma was. Watching her interact with her children, or even Henry, made that very clear to Emma. Cherise was the type of mother Emma had always longed for. She wasn’t jealous that Henry was close to Cherise, but she was jealous of how easy it was for Cherise to be a mother. It was like that was what she’d been born to be, whereas Emma felt like she was floundering, and failing her son.

Emma had just planned on helping Cherise clear the table while the kids played, but now that they’d ended up alone in the kitchen, maybe she should ask. Emma felt close enough to Cherise to let down her walls a bit and ask, especially since this was for Henry. It was still a difficult thing to bring up.

“You’re really good with Henry,” she said, setting down some of the dirty plates by the sink. “I don’t think he’s smiled this much in a while. I … how do you do it?” Emma hadn’t meant to ask so quickly. She’d wanted to start with a slow discussion about Henry and Cherise’s relationship before asking for some pointers, but it was too emotional of a subject for that. It was either ask now or don’t ask at all. “Not just make him happy. You’re such a good parent, to all of your kids and Henry. It comes so naturally to you.” Emma was sure Cherise could hear a bit of the jealousy in her voice. She tried not to be jealous of the other woman, but it was so difficult. Cherise could take any child in and care for them wonderfully, where Emma struggled to do that with her own son sometimes. “I always feel like … I’m pretending more than I’m actually parenting.”

Emma couldn’t really look at Cherise after that admission, so she just started washing one of the plates, a bit aggressively. If she focused on scrubbing the plate clean, maybe she could scrub away some of her feelings of inadequacy as well.

@afterxthexrainxgoes

afterxthexrainxgoes-blog

Thanksgiving was chaos at the Hopper Home. It meant lots of family and often lots of friends. That was plenty of mouths to feed and overstimulated children. Cherise had to prepare herself for every major holiday. Minor holidays were also a task. Passover had become a sort of large gathering as well. Yet Thanksgiving and Christmas were probably the biggest... She was happy to have Emma there. She was happier that Henry seemed to be enjoying himself. So long as he could be a child for a little longer, then she didn’t have a single care. No matter how many things went wrong, so long as she had happy children and smiling faces at the table. They didn’t have to know about gravy emergencies or the pie they had to throw out because Pongo helped himself to it. Sometimes, the little catastrophes made it fun. It was nice to have help in the kitchen. She could banish Archie into the living room to try and handle her father, which wasn’t an easy ordeal. He was likely trying to rile everyone up with his humor and that could sometimes end badly. Some of the younger children were going to show signs of needing to be put to bed soon, so Cherise was already preparing bottles and other various things she’d need from the kitchen. Having Emma help clean with her was going to save her time and stress. Archie did a wonderful job as well, but he made a better peacemaker than Cherise could. He was needed elsewhere. She was busy warming bottles when she had heard Emma’s plea. Her hand had pulled away from the microwave as it whirred, indicating the milk was warming. “Emma...” What an awful thing to feel. Emma didn’t exactly ask for this life or to parent in this way. She was sharing the role...and in a way, she shared it with Cherise, as well. Henry chose to stay with her and Archie. He often asked for their advice with Regina or would ask for explanations when it came to Emma. It was still her first time parenting and it was difficult when you weren’t being given a small child you could relate to and understand their developing personality. Cherise frowned at Emma and gestured to a stool by the island she often worked on. “Sit. I’ll...make you something warm. You like hot chocolate, right? I keep the good stuff in the cabinet for the kids. Archie drinks it, too. I can’t...I...you need some.” She had started to warm milk on the stove. After cooking a Thanksgiving meal, now she was making hot chocolate for Emma. Pouring the mix in, she spoke softly. “I have an advantage, Emma. I’ve known him for most of his life. I’ve taught him... I...” There was no easy answer to this, though. “...My mother is a fairy who tends to children. Or rather, she was. That’s what we once were. It’s in my blood, Emma. It’s unfair to compare yourself...” Cherise chewed on her lip worriedly as she looked over her shoulder at Emma. “Because...he loves you. And you do an amazing job. I know because I see it.”

#ic #storybrooke #punchbackandsaythisiswhoiam

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after the rain goes