Agent Jazzy

Hello there! I'm Jazmin, but you can call me Jazzy. I'm 26. I like a bunch of things from various fandoms, so expect to see a variety of things reblogged.

[crabussy]

I have every word ever blocked. I could be mutuals with axe murderers and I wouldn't know because I have "#axe murdering" in my blocked tags. it's so peaceful here (hears a noise behind me) (doesn't turn around)

[mylordshesacactus]

For all that the 1800s etiquette guides are--obviously--derangedly sexist from a modern perspective? They're also mindblowing in how casually they will assert things that MODERN DAY CONSERVATIVES would scream and cry and shit their pants about.

"People back then always married young it's natural!!!" Every single 1800s guide I've ever met casually mentions that, of course, you really shouldn't get married before you're at least 20, and waiting until 25 is usually better.

Or, like. Okay here's a long segment:

Just firmly going "it is crazy sexist to blame The Wife for overspending when thirty seconds of asking questions will immediately establish that her husband was outright lying to her about how much money they had. Talk to your wife like a normal person."

Or--okay, here. A section on being honest and not writing love letters in secret, because that's usually a good sign that there's something untoward going on....

....except that he then immediately acknowledges that sometimes, the reason you're hiding this from your parents is that your parents suck. That there are parents who frankly have not earned the right to approve or disapprove of your partner.

(I realize the phrasing there sounds a lot less strong than my summary, but--trust me on this. When you're familiar with the narrative voice of these kinds of books, this passage is downright radical. The mere acknowledgement that if you treat your kids badly, it's your own damn fault when they don't talk to you? I've genuinely never seen that before in this genre. Don't freak out over "properly trained", either. It's just a linguistic shift--at the time, "training" was used the way we would say "raising" a child today. )

[engagemythrusters]

"hands are made for holding" not in star wars. in star wars theyre made for geting chopped off..

[actualbird]

i posted about my omegaverse pill bottles and how they help me take my bipolar meds more regularly and it became a hit tweet im wheezing

[silvaurum]

it's not stupid if it works!!

[beybuniki]

everyone is so kind to sam also this is based on a post that i can't find anymore but i agree i think john would simply #forget about vaccines poor sam

[beybuniki]

the maid outfit isn't even sexy i don't get that appeal in general he just looks stupid and gets dean even more irritated

[raptorific]

Go sing along to "love shack." Do the voice. Be unafraid.

[raptorific]

HUGGIN and a KISSIN, DANCIN and a LOVIN, wearing NEXT to NOTHing cause it's HOT as an OVen. The WHOLE shack SHIMMIES!

[raptorific]

By the by I mentioned the question of "what kind of car does the singer have that could Seat About 20" and despite the fact that he'd never given any thought to the question before he, without hesitation, replied "it would have to be a 1954 Chrysler Crown Imperial Limousine" and he had no way of knowing that I'd looked it up earlier in the day and already knew that was the right answer

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[dogpuppy]

[mens-rights-activia]

[parkchanwoohoo]

[diamondeyes-deluxe]

I work with kids and sometimes we have to do safety lessons with them about like, not telling strangers on the internet your home address or something. And sometimes the kids wont understand why, so you have to impart upon them that, well, some adults want to hurt children. And thats kind of difficult to do, because you have to beat around the bush, both because you dont want to scare them (while still making them understand how serious it is) and because you might lose your job if you explain it too straight forward.

Luckily, for some reason, the villain of one of the most popular franchises with children for the last 10 years happens to be a serial child murderer. So when a kid asks why they shouldnt trust strangers, instead of hand wringing and humhawing my answer out, I can just say "we dont always know when a strange adult has good intentions with children, or when they are William Afton."

[agonizingdespair]

[cloudabserk]

“fujoshis are harmful to gay men” not this gay man.

[cloudabserk]

on twitter this got a bunch of responses like “wow even the evil fujoshis? the homophobic yet hypocritically fetishistic ones? what if the fujoshi is racist?” and like well no obviously not in that case.

[cloudabserk]

“shoutout to everybody from new jersey!” “even the new jersey serial killers…?”

[unpretty]

many downsides to ibs but one that's definitely up there is entering a public bathroom to find some girls having a heart to heart. maybe one of them is crying. like okay i get it. you're having a moment. it is maybe not ideal to have your wracking sobs interrupted by the sound of someone jumping on a whoopie cushion full of gelatin. i also do not want this to be happening in the middle of your grocery store breakdown. but bathroom technology has not yet advanced to the point of having a special nightmare shits quarantine so we're all just going to have to deal.

[sa-x]

how it feels remembering charlie kirk got shot through the neck and died

[bigbigbigtruck]

i’ll be real, kitten, daddy needs multiple wealthy and powerful folks to die in a painful, drawn-out, and generationally humiliating manner

[sevenmoreminutes]

kurtis conner video: This Conservative Influencer is Crazy

drew gooden video: The us governments obsession with integrating ai into every facet of our daily lives is going to bring about the collapse of society if we don’t get of our ass and start taking action

danny gonzalez video: Buying Food on Ebay

[sevenmoreminutes]

eddy burback video: I did the russian sleep experiment for a month

[headspace-hotel]

"subtext" and "buttsex" being anagrams of each other is an example of order and harmony in the universe