imagine youre maya jayashtri. you've had a long day and there's 7 minutes left til the store closes, when two middle aged gentlemen, carrying a basil plant and a single sweet potato and who are obviously in a fight make small talk at your register. they say they're new in town, that they bought your partner's childhood home from the shitty company that stole it from her.
you finish up your work and meet them outside. you insinuate that they're a couple and one of them starts screaming at you to watch your mouth. you apologize and they snort a line of coke from the handlebar of their broken electric scooter.
they tell you they want to improve this town and they have nine (9) buses. you have to see it to believe it so you follow them home.
you get there and see that they do in fact have nine buses, as well as an additional four roommates. you ask what their relationship is and they reply "dual male income household" and "San Fransisco," as if that means anything.
they invite you to hang out sometime but tell you that they have just moved and have no furniture, but you can meet them at the bar they somehow already co-own. before you leave, one of them runs at a superhuman speed and tears off the height chart from the wall of your partner's childhood home.


















