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a hesitant purist.

[ahesitantpurist]

· • ⸰ °

願在木而為桐， 作膝上之鳴琴； 悲樂極以哀來， 終推我而輟音。 考所願而必違， 徒契契以苦心。 擁勞情而罔訴， 步容與於南林。 栖木蘭之遺露， 翳青松之餘陰。 儻行行之有覿， 交欣懼於中號。

nguyện tại mộc nhi vị đồng tác tất thướng chi minh cầm bi lạc cực dĩ ai lai chung thôi ngã nhi chuyết âm khảo sở nguyện nhi tất vi đồ khiết khiết dĩ khổ tâm ủng lạo tình nhi võng tố bộ dung dữ ư nam lâm thê mộc lan chi di lộ ế thanh tùng chi dư âm thảng hành hành chi hữu địch giao hân cụ ư trung hào

⌢

đào tiềm ⎠ nhàn tình phú

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[ahesitantpurist]

wildlife is and should be useless in the same way art, music, poetry and even sports are useless

richard conniff ⎠ useless creatures

[ahesitantpurist]

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⌣

[ahesitantpurist]

⸢làm sao biết có những ban mai lần nữa ...⸥

⌢

việt anh ⎠ xin giữ em cho hoàng hôn

⌣

[ahesitantpurist]

· • ⸰ °

白鷺下秋水， 孤飛如墜霜。 心閑且未去， 獨立沙洲旁。

bạch lộ hạ thu thuỷ cô phi như trụy sương tâm nhàn thả vị khứ độc lập sa châu bàng

⌢

lý bạch ⎠ bạch lộ tư

⌣

[ahesitantpurist]

tình yêu như trái phá, con tim mù lòa

trịnh công sơn ⎠ tình sầu

[ahesitantpurist]

cảm ơn người đã ái mộ, phút cuối như thuở đầu

張靚穎 ⎠ 一生一次心一動

[ahesitantpurist]

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this

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[ahesitantpurist]

by which i mean not a ◜good◞ writer or a ◜bad◞ writer but simply a writer, a person whose most absorbed and passionate hours are spent arranging words on pieces of paper

◌

grammar is a piano i play by ear, since i seem to have been out of school the year the rules were mentioned. all i know about grammar is its infinite power. to shift the structure of a sentence alters the meaning of that sentence, as definitely and inflexibly as the position of a camera alters the meaning of the object photographed. many people know about camera angles now, but not so many know about sentences. the arrangement of the words matters, and the arrangement you want can be found in the picture in your mind. the picture dictates the arrangement. the picture dictates whether this will be a sentence with or without clauses, a sentence that ends hard or a dying-fall sentence, long or short, active or passive. the picture tells you how to arrange the words and the arrangement of the words tells you, or tells me, what’s going on in the picture. nota bene.

it tells you you don’t tell it

.

i like the sound of the words: why i write. there you have three short unambiguous words that share a sound, and the sound they share is this:

i

i

i

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joan didion ⎠ why i write

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[ahesitantpurist]

doesn't everything die at last, and too soon? tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?

· • ⸰ °

don't bother me i've just been born the butterfly's loping flight carries it through the country of the leaves delicately, and well enough to get it where it wants to go, wherever that is, stopping here and there to fuzzle the damp throats of flowers and the black mud; up and down it swings, frenzied and aimless; and sometimes for long delicious moments it is perfectly lazy, riding motionless in the breeze of the soft stalk of some ordinary flower

the god of dirt came up to me many times and said so many wise and delectable things; i lay on the grass listening to his dog voice crow voice frog voice; now he said, and now and never once mentioned forever which has nevertheless always been like a sharp iron hoof at the center of my mind

one or two things are all you need to travel over the blue pond, over the deep roughage of the trees and through the stiff flowers of lightning— some deep memory of pleasure, some cutting knowledge of pain but to lift the hoof! for that you need an idea

for years and years i struggled just to love my life. and then the butterfly rose, weightless, in the wind —don't love your life too much— it said and vanished into the world

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mary oliver  ⎠ the summer day ⎠ one or two things

人魚 ⎠ ジェルキャンドル

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[ahesitantpurist]

i miss. like chess. mind against mind

· • ⸰ °

don’t listen to me; my heart’s been broken i don’t see anything objectively i know myself; i’ve learned to hear like a psychiatrist when i speak passionately that’s when i’m least to be trusted it’s very sad, really: all my life, i’ve been praised for my intelligence, my powers of language, of insight in the end, they’re wasted— i never see myself standing on the front steps, holding my sister’s hand that’s why i can’t account for the bruises on her arm, where the sleeve ends in my own mind, i’m invisible: that’s why i’m dangerous people like me, who seem selfless we’re the cripples, the liars we’re the ones who should be factored out in the interest of truth when i’m quiet, that’s when the truth emerges a clear sky, the clouds like white fibers underneath, a little gray house, the azaleas red and bright pink if you want the truth, you have to close yourself to the older daughter, block her out when a living thing is hurt like that in its deepest workings all function is altered that’s why i’m not to be trusted because a wound to the heart is also a wound to the mind ⌢

louise glück  ⎠ dead end ⎠ the untrustworthy speaker

1/f candle ⎠ 氷のキャンドル

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[ahesitantpurist]

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kisetsu hibigurashi 

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[ahesitantpurist]

or the softness of youth be gone from our faces. or love's first tenderness die in our gaze.

· • ⸰ °

to shores by the wash of the tremulous tide where men have heaped no burial-mounds and the days pass by like a wayward tune where broken faith has never been known and the blushes of first love never have flown

⸛

but the love-dew dims our eyes till the day when god shall come from the sea with a sigh and bid the stars drop down from the sky and the moon like a pale rose wither away

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william butler yeats ⎠ the wanderings of oisin

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[ahesitantpurist]

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johann besse

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[ahesitantpurist]

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tamino ⎠ intervals

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[ahesitantpurist]

a mind that lives in order

◌

a mind that lives in order, total order, which is the highest form of mathematical order, cannot for a single minute allow the shadow of disorder to come upon it. and that disorder comes into being when the mind acts on the basis of past knowledge in relationship. so how is the mind not to record the insult, but know the insult has been given, as well as flattery? can it know it has been given, but yet not record it, so the mind is always clean, healthy, whole in relationship?—

how to live a life in relationship, in which the mid has never been hurt, never been distorted. now is this possible? we have put an impossible question. it is already finished, done; but if you ask the impossible question, the mind has to find the answer. can the mind do that? that is love. the mind that records no insult, no flattery, knows what love is—

we live in relationship. relationship is not an abstraction, it is a daily, everyday fact— you are always in relationship. and if there is no order in that relationship between you and another, or between you and many or one, you will create a culture that will ultimately produce disorder, as is being done now. so order is absolutely essential. to find that out, can the mind, though it has been insulted, hurt, knocked about, had brutal things said to it, never for a second hold it? the moment you hold it, it is already recorded, it has left a mark in the brain cells. see the difficulty of this question. can the mind do this so that the mind remains totally innocent? a mind that is innocent means a mind that is incapable of being hurt. because it is incapable of being hurt, it will not hurt another—

...

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krishnamurti ⎠ on love and loneliness

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[ahesitantpurist]

what is lonelier, to grieve or not love anyone enough to?

alexis bates