Andy Hobday's Punctum Project

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You wait for our eye to sort of "turn on", for the elements to fall into place and that ineffable rush to occur, a feeling of exultation when you look through that ground glass, counting ever so slowly, clenching teeth and whispering to Jessie to holdstillholdstillholdstill and just knowing that it will be good, that it is true.

Sally Mann

It is very easy for me to connect and associate with the emotions and the experience that Sally is expressing in this quote. That ever illusive feeling of being in “flow”, when the entire world seems to come to a halt and the barriers between the experience and that who is experiencing seem to melt away. The feeling of being completely absorbed in one’s passion, Sally utilizes words and phrases such as ineffable rush, exultation and truth to describe her reality in that moment.  The clenching of the teeth, praying that Jessie does not move a muscle, she transports the reader directly to that breathless moment that surely precedes the capturing of any eternal photograph.

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Title: Identical Twins Cathleen and Colleen, Members of a Twin Club in New Jersey

Artist: Diane Arbus

Year: 1966

A pair of twin sisters wearing identically dreary clothing which is juxtaposed with the intense facial expressions of the two sisters. The facial expressions are opposing in nature as one sister is expressing joy and happiness and the other sister seems to be expressing sadness or discontent. To see the sisters expressing opposite emotions is intensified by the fact that they have identical physical features.

There is something quite chilling about this photograph and yet when we were at the museum I could not pull myself away from it. It is alluring, inviting and repulsive all at the same time. The photo “works” by comparing the experience of opposing emotions on the faces of identical twins. It would almost appear that it is the same human photographed twice and placed next to herself. 

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You don't write because you want to say something, you write because you have something to say.

F. Scott Fitzgerald

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“I employ these allusions to James and Fitzgerald not only as descriptive devices, but because my parents are most real to me in fictional terms. And perhaps my cool aesthetic distance itself does more to convey the arctic climate of our family than any particular literary comparison.”

When I finally arrived to page 67 of Bechdel’s “Fun Home”, I was relieved to read these words because they expressed a sentiment that I had been aware of throughout the course of the reading and yet could not quite put into words. In my opinion, no two words in the English language better describe the situation surrounding Alison’s family life than “arctic climate”. Indeed, from the first page of the novel, we are confronted with the chilling persona of Bechdel’s father and the supreme indifference and emotional dislocation that he exudes. Confused by his homosexuality and lost in his inescapable depression, Alison’s depiction of her father is impressively consistent and we are forced to encounter again and again his cold, lifeless expression that only seems to waiver into a half-smile once or twice throughout the reading (Unsurprisingly, one of those times is while he is drinking with one of his students pg. 66).

After being given a brief and concise snapshot of Bechdel’s family life in the first 80 or so pages, it is hardly difficult to understand why Alison developed into the incredibly unique individual that she appears to be. Adding in the fact that she herself is a lesbian and thus straying even more from the mainstream tradition and we have a perfect recipe for an individual who posses necessary levels of depth and yet also a cold and removed persona that was passed onto her by her father. In short, Alison Bechdel has a story to tell. 

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“Photographs really are experience captured, and the camera is the ideal arm of consciousness in its inquisitive mood.” This picture was taken of me by my dear friend Jay Kshirsagar while we were backpacking through the Himalayas. This will forever stand as one of the most beautiful and awe-inspiring moments of my life and I am fortunate enough to have the moment captured for eternity. In this photo, I think Sontag would be interested in my position compared to that of the river and the mountains in the background. The size of the mountains is impressive and can make a human feel very small. I find that Sontag’s quote fits well with my feelings towards this photo and it is one of a select few that I cherish dearly. To be honest, I have a slight aversion towards taking photos and I feel that the majority of the time, it takes away from that which is being experienced. It has always seemed logical in my mind that if an experience is note worthy enough to be photographed, then the effect of said experience should be discoverable in my being at any moment moving forward. However, I will admit that in a select few cases, I am very grateful to have photographs available.