#CLONECOP

independent arthur bell  private  highly selective

[aintcats-blog]

okay  so  for  now  and  possibly  permanently  art  is  being  moved  to  my  new  multimuse  blog  with  some  other  orphan  black  muses  and  from  other  fandoms  so  hmu  over  there  if  you  would  like  to  continue  writing.   i  will  carry  my  threads  over  onto  there  if  people  are  okay  with  this.

[wnq-writers]

It takes a lot to be kind. You were fed a lot of fairy tales and fables growing up only to realise they don’t apply in real life. You try to be good, yet bad things still happen. Some days, you walk around with your insides feeling dead cold and the last thing you want to do is smile. But nobody ever said it was going to be easy. It takes extreme courage and strength and effort to be compassionate. It makes you vulnerable, and the worst thing is you might not even get rewarded for it. It is never easy. So if today you were kind even though you felt torn up on the inside, you are wonderful and you deserve to be celebrated.

Sylvia, Unsung Bravery   (via lilylunamusings)

[nonexistentiality]

[bodhilukes]

send me an au and i’ll give you 5+ headcanons about it

[thelovejournals]

I love you, that means I’m not just here for the pretty parts. I’m here no matter what.

Claudia Gray, Hourglass (via thelovejournals)

[aintcats-blog]

valiantcop:

                 it’s all our fight now, he says. but she doesn’t want it to be. this is not what she fought for, why she kept all these secrets, why she embarked on this journey alone. ( so she could keep them away, happy, safe. ) and now all that’s gone. she fought and sacrificed herself so she could screw up one last time, so she could fail one last time, all before her supposed death. perhaps she should’ve listened to mika, perhaps she shouldn’t have exposed alison and cosima to their biology. they would’ve been safer, and sarah’s shitty decision to impersonate her wouldn’t have resulted in a second fall down a rabbit hole they can’t climb back up. ‘ it’s not. ‘   short, definite, and in a true beth childs fashion. she thinks about leaving it at that, pushing him away again. she doesn’t.   ‘ it doesn’t have to be. you have a kid, art. you should be looking after her. just – just look after her, okay? forget about this mess. ‘   more time and space? what the fuck –   ‘ i don’t need time or space, dipshit. don’t give me that crap. we’re not dating. ‘

                                              ❝ MAYA  is just fine. ❞   his little girl had worshipped his partner;  her face alight when she’d walk into the flat,  bending down to say hello.   ❝  --  look,  like it or not i’m involved now.  you have a new family to protect,  i get it.  i know you care for them,  beth. ❞   an assumption,  of  COURSE,   the detective had not yet witnessed beth spending time with her sisters,  her little niece.  but what else could drive a woman to such extremes?  for him,  this had been primarily for  BETH  but not entirely.  those women who wore her face,  they were individuals with lives and rights being stolen by corporations,  by curiosity and greed.  how could he let a child of  EIGHT  become scientific property,  a woman such as helena who has lost so much  --  he could not stand by while more was taken from her.  even sarah,  wild and untameable sarah manning,  had a fire that did not deserve to be dampened,  that reminded him of who beth had once been.   ❝ i can help  PROTECT  them.  i’m not walking away just because you’ve emerged from the shadows,  childs.  and don’t give me that crap.  it’s not to do with  --  that. ❞   no accusation,  but his  MEANING  was clear.  the night she had spent upon his couch,  in his bed.   ❝ if you need time to put your shit in order before coming out of hiding,  or whatever it is you plan to do,  you let us know. ❞   taking a step back,  just one  --  so carefully placed.  breathing space,  a moment to process being  GIVEN  to beth like a gift.

[agent-timross]

A note about shipping with me

[aintcats-blog]

agent-timross:

I probably already ship it

not that I deliberately start rp'ing with people for the purposes of shipping, but if there’s chemistry, if there’s interesting interaction, then yeah, I probably ship it

you don’t have to ship it too; it’s fun to torture the muse with unrequited feelings okay

I will never pressure you into a ship

if you feel like i’m pressuring you, let me know and i’ll do my best to rectify the behavior

if you want to ship a thing, pitch it to me. the answer is probably yes.

that said, don’t assume it without at least mentioning it to me ooc first.

ships are usually in their own seperate verses unless we’ve discussed something else.

if you ship with me I’ll ruin your life

[owlmylove]

wrist pinning (◡‿◡✿) 

hair tugging (◕‿◕✿) 

wall slamming (ʘ‿ʘ✿)

POSSESSIVE BEHAVIOR (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧*:・ﾟ✧

[sheepmasked-blog]

                                            I DON’T HAVE MANY FRIENDS.

[aintcats-blog]

i will finish my starters and things tomorrow evening maybe idk.  i’m in the hospital all day and idk how i’ll feel when i get in.  i also have my new baby,  mika  (  aka mk,  aka veera suominen )  but i’ll do them asap.  promise.

[imoved5643347-deactivated201510]

the nerd i reblogged this from has a quality blog & i recommend you all follow them.

[aintcats-blog]

valiantcop:

                  she monitors his advancing steps, frozen and unflinching, a statue perched on the empty space between the back of the chair she’s leaning against and her former partner. beth scoffs, and it feels so spontaneous, so normal, as if the tape has been rewinded and he’s stubbornly offering his help for whatever situation he assumes she needs his fucking help while she, in turn, dismisses it. he could never keep his nose out of her business, could he? the dipshit. he put himself at risk back when she screwed up and he’s doing it again now – for sarah, under the false pretext that he’s doing it for the partner he thought he knew. his words snap her back to reality. she looks up, and only after she musters the courage to meet art’s gaze does she realize how close he’s standing. discomfort crawls under her skin at that, her fingers flexing around her upper arm to tighten her grip on it. beth readies herself to speak, though even as her lips crack open she doesn’t ( yet ). instead, tastes the drought in her mouth and swallows the dust and particles of her regrets.   ‘ i need you to stop trying to fix my shit. this is not your fight. ‘

                                        every step,  every lie,  every  RISK  had been for beth. the partner he couldn’t save.  the words he could never say.  the sisters were never confused in his mind,  separated as much as any other family,  there had not been a moment where sarah had slipped into the hole beth had carved out in his chest and yet he gave to her as much as he could of all he should have given to beth.  it was the right thing to do,  the  RIGHT  thing to do,  the right thing to do.  he repeated it like a mantra,  each risk he wagered in this controversial war was a risk for him and his kid.  all he had  EVER  wanted to do was the right thing;  it’s what had drawn him to the force.  but it went deeper than that.  when beth had stepped out in front of that train,  all those maybes and one days he’d been cautiously saving up had run out.  there were no more chances.  and yet  HERE  she was.  a hollow shell of the woman he’d lost,  perhaps.  maybe she hated him,  detested his weakness,  but how could he turn his back?  he would  ANSWER  any call,  follow through on any job.  because it was the right thing to do,  because it was for beth.   ❝ that’s where you’re wrong,  beth.  things have changed.  it’s all our fight now. ❞   he thought back over those tapes,  all he had learned in her absence about her;   I KNOW YOU NOW ;  I CAN SEE YOU NOW.   but he did not speak of that,  held his tongue on that matter.   ❝ if you need more time  -- ?  more space? ❞

[aintcats-blog]

valiantcop:

                  she could have not gone awol to begin with. she could have stayed, found another way to protect those closest to her, a way that could have kept him, and everyone else, as far away from this clusterfuck as possible. she could have, she should have – hypothesis takes last place in her list of priorities, and yet it’s hypothesis that causes her headache. she doesn’t mind the accusations ( they’re just right, anyway ), won’t mind if he’s angry. she gets it. she’d be angry too if that could change anything.   ‘ i didn’t want to bring you into this. ‘   i was scared. i had to do it alone.   ‘ so much for trying, huh? you got involved anyway. ‘

                                       it was no use yelling,  explaining what he’d done  --  what they’d all been through since her disappearance.  none of this was beth’s fault.  he could not,  would never,   BLAME  her.  this was a crazy,  fucked up world he had stumbled into,  but it was beth’s birthright.  she could not walk away.  although apparently not for lack of trying.   ❝ not  LIKELY,   beth. ❞   his usual gruff reply;  how could he have avoided this?  how could any of them back away now?  stepping closer,  his hands were almost raised  --  the way he might approach a victim on the job,  a shaken child.  she was his partner.  but  BETH  was more than that.  she’d always been more than that.  and she had a family now,  sisters,  a niece.  the universe in which he had known this woman,  loved this woman,  did not seem to compute with the reality he’d crashed into today.    ❝ now,  it’s too late;  i’m  INVOLVED.  you gotta stop shutting people out.  what do you need? ❞

[skaiforged-deactivated20160701]

paintingflcwcrs:

❛ i don’t know what i’m doing with my life, but i know i’m doing it wrong ❜ ❛ i am so cute and bitter ❜ ❛ my life is one part ‘wait’ and another part ‘what’ ❜ ❛ my #1 talent is saying stupid things to people and immediately regretting it ❜ ❛ i love sleeping to avoid problems ❜ ❛ i hate myself a lot but i get offended when other people do ❜ ❛ i’m hungrier than the neopet i neglected for nine years ❜ ❛ hit me up if you wanna date a piece of shit ❜ ❛ we need some new and more powerful swears ❜ ❛ i get progressively uglier throughout the day ❜ ❛ i’m so miserable, but i laugh at everything ❜ ❛ i need something that is more than coffee, but less than cocaine ❜ ❛ just because you’re trash doesn’t mean you can’t do great things. it’s called garbage can, not garbage cannot. ❜ ❛ 90 out of 10 people agree that math is fucking lame ❜ ❛ if you think i’m ugly now, you should have seen me in 2009 ❜ ❛ 2010 me would literally be terrified of 2016 me and i love it ❜ ❛ i have a rare skin condition called close the fucking blinds ❜ ❛ hey babe, i made you this mixtape for valentines day. i don’t know many love songs, so it’s just uptown funk 18 times in a row. ❜ ❛ there are people who know me in real life who think i’m straight and that’s really funny to me ❜ ❛ i was cursed with expensive taste and a low budget ❜ ❛ yo dude i trusted you wtf the fuck? what the fuck?? what the fuck what the ❜ ❛ open flannel shirts and lingerie are the hottest thing and nobody can convince me otherwise ❜ ❛ i’m the weird dad, wine mom, vodka aunt, and gay emo cousin all in one person ❜ ❛ that awful moment when you wake up ❜ ❛ damn haha i’m going to have to deal with that sooner or later ❜ ❛ are we gonna fucking hold hands tonight or what bitch ❜ ❛ people our age have children what the hell i am a children ❜ ❛ i don’t like your clothes. take them off. ❜ ❛ why am i only motivated to sort my life out at 4 am? ❜ ❛ after i die, i’ll probably still complain ❜ ❛ people are so petty and then here i am, me, an angel ❜ ❛ if i don’t insult you daily, it means i don’t like you ❜ ❛ do something with your life that would make a 1950s straight white man angry ❜ ❛ i need to get laid… to rest. put me in a coffin. let my soul ascend. ❜ ❛ i’m trying to be a better person, but some people are testing me ❜ ❛ i’m overstressed and underfucked ❜ ❛ i can’t wait to be a piece of shit with a bachelors degree ❜ ❛ my emo phase never went away, it just aged like fine wine ❜ ❛ my whole life consists of wondering whether or not to make the bitchy comment ❜ ❛ i don’t have time for people who don’t believe in aliens ❜ ❛ the lack of cuddling i am experiencing right now is upsetting ❜ ❛ why do good concert tickets happen to bad people ❜ ❛ i can’t play hard to get i’m already hard to want ❜ ❛ i’m still pissed off about growing up ❜ ❛ if you listen carefully, you can hear me whisper ‘shut the fuck up’ at least once every five minutes ❜ ❛ when i die i want my heart donated to NASA so they can finally see what a black hole looks like up close ❜ ❛ single and ready to take a 20 hour nap ❜ ❛ write ‘nothing is set in stone’ on my grave as both a witty joke and a subtle warning that i will be back ❜ ❛ how do people even put up with me like i can’t even put up with me ❜ ❛ the opening riff to mr. brightside could literally raise me from the dead ❜ ❛ stale cinnamon roll, been in this world too long, too cynical  ❜ ❛ sorry, i’m poor. i can’t afford to pay attention ❜ ❛ aziz ansari’s voice in the back of my head faintly telling me to treat myself is going to be my downfall ❜ ❛ is it too late to wrap myself up like a baby and drop myself off on a billionaire’s doorstep? ❜ ❛ my neutral expression makes me look like i’m always in a bad mood which is convenient because it’s usually true ❜ ❛ i never run voluntarily so if you ever see me running you should start running too because something is coming ❜

[isaacdamerons]

[karmasama-com]

The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.

Albert Einstein 

[dtchilds-deactivated20190709]

“I don’t care if you don’t want my help, I’ll do it anyways.”

                he will, won’t he? he’ll put his ass on the line for her ( and he did – he risked his job to help her keep her own ) and beth doesn’t know what’s worse: knowing he would give his life if it meant saving hers, or realizing that she’ll let him do it. in some sick and twisted way, she likes the attention, likes feeling wanted, needed. it’s more than paul gives her and it fills her up with disgust at the person she sees in the bathroom mirror right after she snorts her first powdered pill for the day. she’s leading him on, stringing him along. ( beth knows the extent of his feelings. he doesn’t make them obvious, but they’re too obvious to her. ) first she screws him, then she screws him over. and now he’s fixing her mess, gluing together the parts of her that fell apart and before his feet as if that’s his job. and she hates him. she hates him for being there for her. hates how he comes running when things get out of control and she’s there, against a wall, hands crossed over her chest, stammering, shaking. she hates him when he plants the phone in chen’s hand and grips her shoulders and tells her that they’ll get through this together. she hates him when he takes her home that night, too. but when she opens her eyes, all they reflect is defeat. and her voice, though maintaining a bit of its harsh note, is sweetened with pity.   ‘ don’t do this —– please, art. ‘ // @aintcats + meme. accepting.