Emotionally Unavailable™

My beautiful dark twisted fantasy

[gdfgdfgggg-deactivated20160311]

[unsubconscious]

Iri B., Glass #2 Oil on canvas, 60 x 80cm

[thekimonogallery]

Snowy morning in Yoshikawa, Kyoto.  Japan

[omneco]

[thecollectibles]

Art by Yuming Li

[zagrebinaa]

[jakobhetzer]

[fohk]

[perriaeyjeve]

[sorrrowfull]

[nephranexus]

[perriaeyjeve]

[imperhius]

[letsbelonelytogetherr]

— william wordsworth (via letsbelonelytogetherr)

[geistmane]

I miss going out well into the night with friends. Walking around, joking, drinking, smoking. Getting ourselves into trouble. Running from cops and adults. Looking for cool places to kick it.

I remember getting on the roof of a few schools and churches. They ended up installing cameras to keep us off. Stealing bottles from target, before they started to tag them. Stupid shit for us to do but we were free.

There was I time I felt invincible. Getting old want possible. I didn't have anxiety attacks. I didn't fear the world yet. I trusted my people. It never lasts long enough.

I only leave my home when I need to work. I lost my passion. I'm afraid to meet new people. I'm not good at socializing. I've had girlfriends but only ever went on a single date back in junior high. I'm 26. My life is pathetic. A worm.

I find it hard to trust people. It takes time for me to create a version of myself that can fit new acquaintances. It's difficult to say positive things about myself, even though I don't think I'm a bad person. I'm no good at being one.

I'm paranoid. It's not a bad as it once was. I used to sleep with a knife under my pillow and a baseball bat under my bed where I can reach it. I used to keep a banana looped into a padlock. I would get nervous turning my back to people. I would have constant panic attacks while driving. It's not that bad anymore.

[palm-txt]

[guzgecesi]

The eyes Chico, they never lie.