This whole break up thing is bullshit.
Why has she got to treat me like the enemy? Why has she forgotten that when she was seriously mentally ill, I stood by her? It drained me, it took away everything I am, *I wasn’t happy* , and yet I still did it, I took out loans to pay rent and bills because I didnt want to approach her about paying any of it because she couldnt find a job...I’m still in debt to this day because of it. And yet, she’s not happy for six months and thats cause to end it? and dont even get me started on fair weather friends, people who haven’t spoken to me about the break up since it happened, or even asked me how I am -cowards, the lot of them. The only positive to come from this is that I know who my friends are, I knew it all along, but this cemented it.
I remember when we got together, we said to each other “I know this wont last forever, but lets make it amazing while it lasts” but I thought we’d bucked the trend, I thought it was going to last forever, but now all I see is her engagement ring on the side, and not on her finger. Throughout this relationship I've done nothing that warrants feeling like I do right now.
Six years. It might not sound like much, but it feels like forever. My moving date is edging closer and closer, and I dont even know when shes moving out, but then it’s really the end. Right now, theres still that glimmer of hope, its naive, but its a glimmer, when she’s gone, its over, and I sill dont know what I did wrong. All I’ve ever been is myself, and apparently that wasn’t good enough. But remember , I wasnt happy for a year, but I stood by her because I love her, she wasnt happy for six months, and shes gone.
I’ve lost friends and family because of this, and I’ll never know what I did wrong. All I did was love her.
jacobvanloon
