yo no quería despedirme, tú no querías olvidarme | fender
tagging: alexander smythe, felicia anders.
location: alexander’s apartment.
time frame: time doesn’t exist.
notes: nope.
After getting out of the shower, Felicia decided to let her hair dry naturally, considering she was just going to spend the night at Alexander's place. It didn't seem like they were going to have any fun either, since he seemed to be concentrated in something on his laptop. However, she knew there was something she had to do, since her mind didn't seem to give her a break about it. So, after putting one of his shirts and some shorts, Felicia went to his studio and leaned on the doorframe, casually moving the towel on her hair. "I asked Jessica to do me a favor" The girl licked her lips without noticing it, eyes focusing on his. There was absolutely nothing wrong with what she was doing but still, it felt like something she had to talk with Alexander about, mostly because she had nothing to hide. "She is stalking my ex-boyfriend. I ran into him a few days ago in that gala you didn't want to go" Her tone went slightly accusatory at the end. "I could have done it myself but I wanted more information. You know how resourceful your sister is"
This was normal for them now - for him to work while Felicia made herself at home, showering and then subsequently finding or ordering something to eat. Alexander wouldn't have allowed such behavior from any of the other women he'd slept with, but it was different with Felicia. Besides, she understood his incessant need to work and to get everything right. He'd taken off his glasses to pinch the bridge of his nose after doing some readings; he'd gotten used to being okay with Felicia seeing him in glasses, but it was still a new thing. "Hm?" he questioned, groaning as he stretched then put his glasses back on, smirking at the sight before him. Alexander could get used to seeing her dressed in his shirts after getting out of the shower. The smirk faded from his features once he'd finally caught up with what she'd said, his brows furrowed in confusion at the term 'ex boyfriend'. "Isn't your sister more resourceful?" Alexander asked, knowing the rumors about Cassandra - not that anyone would ever admit to her illicit extracurricular activities. Perhaps that wasn't the best thing to say, and perhaps he should've said more but she'd caught him by surprise. "So..." he trailed off, his jaw clenching; he was uncomfortable with the conversation now, "what do you hope Jessica finds out about him?"
As soon as his smile was out of his lips, Felicia knew he wasn't going to be particularly happy about her course of acction. It made her feel strange, mostly because she was used to him always being on her side, even in the most twisted of her plans. "I don't know what you are talking about" Her reply was automatic when he mentioned Cassie, not even playing attention to the comment as she walked closer to him and managed herself between his desk and his chair. "I don't know" She knew playing dumb wouldn't get her anywhere with Alexander, but maybe trying to tone down the importance of it would make it better. Still, with him, it was better to stay to the truth as much as possible. "He knows about my life, like absolutely everyone else, but I don't know what he's being up to apart from fucking my sister Elizabeth" Her hand reached for his glasses, taking them off softly. Her hand itched to caress the lines of his face, but she wasn't a fucking softie, so she searched for his eyes with his. "I don't like to feel like I don't have information, or the upper hand, you know this"
Alexander's lips pulled up in the faintest hint of a smile, knowing that those words were the automatic response whenever anyone brought up Cassandra's other job. It was better to feign ignorance than to say anything that could implicate any wrongdoings, and he knew that well. He was taken aback by Felicia's words, eyes widening at the mention of her ex-boyfriend sleeping with her sister; it seemed the guy had a type, and he couldn't blame him for that. Alexander watched her as she took off his glasses, his jaw tightening as she handled him almost with care. Almost. Nodding at her words, he remained quiet, trying to search something that would tell him more, especially something that would tell him why she cared so much. Was this guy really that special? "I know." Alexander was uncomfortable with this situation, feeling jealous and in some ways, not that he'd ever admit it, he also felt inadequate. "Why do you care so much? He's your ex for a reason, isn't he?"
Holding the glasses on her hand and staring at him, Felicia knew that the tension on his shoulder has not disappeared a bit. "You don't seem like you know" It was hard, because one part of her wanted to bring him closer and kiss him until he forgot she ever said anything, but there was a bigger part of her that was starting to get angry about the questions. In the end, that part always won. "I'm telling you I want to get more information in case I see him again. I'm not hiding this from you" The grip she had on the glasses tighted just a fraction. How can he not see it? She was being honest with him, even when she didn't own him a single thing or explanation, but she was doing it because she fucking care. And just because now it seemed she needed to fight Alexander too, above all, she couldn't stop herself from "Scott was my boyfriend for a reason too"
The problem was that as much as Felicia hated to feel as if she didn't have enough information and didn't have control or the upper hand, so did Alexander. They got along well because they understood one another, but right now that was a hinderance. They were both feeling the same, though for different reasons. This wasn't what he wanted or how he wanted tonight to go, yet here they were, on the verge of arguing over her ex-boyfriend. Who would've thought? Alexander took a breath, mulling it over, wondering where to go from here. "And what was the reason?" He finally asked, angry that he was at a disadvantage. "Did he treat you like a princess? Was he at your beck and call? Did he take all the punches and come right back to you like a fool?" He smirked, though this was a different type of smirk - it was nasty, full of venom, the type reserved for when he was at his worst. "I'm sure that was it, especially the 'fool' part. He was a lovesick fool and all he wanted was you." He nodded to himself, getting up from the couch to add distance between them. "And when he didn't have you anymore, he went after your sister and decided to bed her, right? To fuck her like he fucked you..." He trailed off, his anger not dissipating just yet, even though he knew he was being unreasonable. "Now you want information on him. You wanna know how it happened... how long it took for him to fuck your sister, right?"
Felicia didn’t know what happen. She knew Alexander was uncomfortable, jealous even, but she thought it was something that at much, would put some awkward tension in their night. Yet, one second she was staring at Alexander and the next, in his place was a man that had completely lost control. It was strange, to be in the receiving end of Alexander’s anger and for a long moment, the only thing she could do was stare at him and maybe wait until it was over. But then, when he started to mention her sister, her eyes started to turn cold, until there was nothing but ice on them. How dare him talk about this, when he had no idea what had happened between them? “Are you done, Alexander?” Leaving the glasses on the table, Felicia moved herself from it, walking closer to him. It was like her body was preparing for a fight, one thing that had never happened when she was with him. “He wasn’t a love sick fool” A lie, since Scott was, at a time. “He was a man in every way that you can be one” Her hand reached for him, pressing against his chest, but this time there was no sweetness or anything alike on the gesture. It was just anger disguised in seduction. “And I can assure you, he never sounded as desperate as you do right now. Was that really all you got? I took you for someone that knew how to punch better than that”
Although he had lived his entire life void of regret, Alexander couldn't help but feel something at the fact that he'd angered her. He could see it in her eyes, there was a coldness he'd never seen before and it was directed toward him. Quirking an eyebrow, he knew she was lying - how could he not be a lovesick fool, whoever this guy was? There was a part of him that knew being with Felicia was a big deal, so he knew her ex boyfriend would've known it too and would've fallen for her hard and fast. Felicia was deflecting, though. She was trying to be the one in charge, using her body and small gestures to drive her words across. "Desperate?" I'm not desperate." Alexander shook his head, moving away from Felicia once again; he couldn't bear to be this close to her. Not now. "You think you dodged my punch, or that it wasn't effective, but I know it hurts you to think that he fucked your sister. I know you and I know thinking about them is making your blood boil." Just like it was making him jealous to know she still cared about her ex boyfriend. "Maybe you should go, Felicia." They had already crossed lines and they were dangerously close to saying things they could never take back and would forever ruin whatever they had.
Just in the same way Alexander knew her, Felicia had a deep understanding of who Alexander was and the little things that gave away how he was feeling. The fact that he kept moving away from her every time she tried to get closer was enough to know he wasn't as control as he tried to make it seem. She was about to say as much, but then words were coming out of his mouth and the girl couldn't deny that he knew exactly what to say. "Just like it's making your blood oil that I want to know about him" The coldness was still there, but now it hurt. It hurt everything because Alexander was supposed to understand that it meant nothing, he was always supposed to be on her side. "You are right. I would kill Elizabeth with my bare hands for touching what is mine if I could" Her eyes remain in his, leaving no room for doubt about her words. "You see right through me" She moved forward again, this time faster so he couldn't move. "Then, who would think that you are not smart enough to see the obvious here?" Don't fucking cry. "If I wanted him, if I wanted him back, what the fuck am I doing here Alexander?" Her eyes looked down for a second and when they went back up, the freazing calmness was back again, in it's place. "I hope you always remember this moment, Alexander" And with that, she made her way to the room so she could get back her stuff, trying to do it as fast as she could.
The muscles in his jaw twitched at her admission that she would hurt her own sister for touching what was hers. This guy, whoever he was, was still someone Felicia cared about and it hurt. It hurt and he hated how it felt. This guy was more important than her own sister; she still saw him as hers. Though he didn't want to show his surprise at her words, at the hint of something behind them, he knew he couldn't help it. His breath hitched when she rhetorically asked him what the fuck she was doing there - that's when it hit him. Felicia cared about him, Alexander, as well. She was right, of course. She could've been chasing after this other guy - they both knew Felicia could get whoever she wanted. Instead, she was being domestic with him, in his apartment, getting out of his shower. His jealousy had gotten the best of him and now it was time for him to pay the price. The consequence, of course, was losing someone he'd grown to actually care for, someone who knew him, who mattered, who didn't care about the person he was. Someone he could've fallen in love with. They were two sides of the same coin, cut by the same cloth. Yet, this was probably it for them. Why? Because he couldn't keep his jealousy and his words in check. And he knew that even though he was in the wrong, he couldn't take it back now as they were both too stubborn and she probably wouldn't accept an apology from him. Alexander had to let Felicia go. It wasn't like him to not fight back, they both knew that much, but he remained standing in the same spot, watching her go.
Felicia couldn’t help but think that maybe it was for the best, her mind instantly going to the objective part of things. She could go right back to screwing everyone on sight and now, she could just go and right to Scott without that nagging feeling on the back of her head. There was nothing holding her back now, not from doing what she wanted, and it was like getting back a piece of herself that she didn’t know it was missing. Alexander had return to her the amazing ability to not care about absolutely anything but herself and, as she put her stuff in her bag, she was thankful. Until Felicia had to stop when she realized that she was putting three of Alexander’s shirt inside her bag without noticing it. It hurt, it hurt that he didn’t trust her, that he didn’t realize that she was putting more on table for him than for any man after Scott. Felicia didn’t do this, didn’t let herself push away like she was anything but the most amazing thing that could ever happen to him and for a second, she was ready to go back and throw everything at him, but she just closed her stuff and walked away. Felicia wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of rejecting her twice in the same hour. As she closed the door she realized that maybe, when she wasn’t paying attention, Felicia had grown another heart and, just like the first time, she was leaving it right in the door of a man’s home, hurt and forgotten.
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