I give hope to others like boxes of chocolate
Like on valentines Day in second grade
Like the birthday card I made awhile ago
I cut up my favorite purple dress,
Filled a teacup with my tears
Plucked a leaf from a plant I grew myself
And brought a teaspoon of
Red orange and yellow flames
Threw them all on a piece of paper
And lined it with my eye lashes
And gave it to her as a gift,
And I did it over and over and over again
For every birthday, anniversary and funeral
[I’ll give you all my hope, please just ask]
I still have a lot of hope left, I need to give more
I inked a dove tattoo on my thigh for whom I love
for every one who has given me hope and yet
But their birds soar like
A ballad made like honey and candlelight
The hot honey and wax did not sting but
stuck and candied my thighs with blemishes
Did you know that when tattoos die completely
They turn into gaping black holes
mine never died completely like other stories
They are stuck at the brink of death
On a ship with half an anchor
[Why am I so hopeless? Why do I know it all?]
I hated it so much before, I assumed that
It hung on because death is the most painful but
Being at the brink before the fall hurts more
It’s like the question I asked my old self
While writing the loneliest poem for a friend
who I try to make anything but lonely
“Would it hurt more to leave your love
On the first night or the last?”
She told me to stop looking for the indescribable
Because it loses meaning with a definition
[I need to hope, and what’s a search with
An unanswerable question?]
Said friend told me about a boy and
His love for moths and I wondered if he also
Would run to the lights like his friends or
Would he let fireflies feed on his heart
render himself heartless for
The feeling of receiving hope,
Knowing that he is worth keeping around
I once drank stars but now I prefer water
Oil and water don’t mix but we wash with soap
I love bubbles but I hate the mess
Maybe I don’t want to know the meaning behind
every mystery, a careless uncalculated story
I don’t need a lot of hope to live as unlike cars
I can use a little bit of fuel and drive to Jupiter
[All knowing and no hoping isn’t everything,
The boy and his moths certainly agree]
All I do is sacrifice and wonder, today it ends
I’ll chase Jupiter but not for its hope
I’ll chase with no definition; I’ll hopelessly hope
The pattern of this poem is left incomplete
I’ll take a pinch of hope and I’ll travel galaxies
Living without definition; it’s indescribable enough
to not need a meaning, and best of all
I’ll hopelessly hope with the little I have left
Look at the stars and find no constellation
Cut my thigh open and let the doves free
Hopelessly hope because, mark my word dear
There is no tomorrow in such a world
We survive, learn without learning and
Hopelessly hope with the world unsolved
[Let’s take a road trip to Jupiter tonight,
Would you like to soar like a moth or a dove?]
titsay
stormborns
gummygunk
