IT'S 5 O'CLOCK SOMEWHERE

people pay me to dig up their dirt. sometimes i do it for free.

[aliasinvestigates-blog]

ofblackwidows:

“People do say I look good for 80.” Natasha couldn’t help but chuckle, smoothing out her jeans before crossing one leg over the other, listening to the woman. The acts had left them no choice. Some registered, some didn’t and started a new life and then there was Nat.  “Well, I’m not sure. Some of us do, yes. We’re trying to adjust to civilian life. Some of us are better than the other though.” She laughed softly at the joke about Bruce and shook her head. “Well, that’s most definitely a smart approach. I never got your name?”

“JESSICA,” she said, holding out her hand. She never held out her hand unless she wanted to flip someone onto their back ( for various reasons ), but she was overcome with an uncharacteristic amount of respect. “Jessica Jones, hoping you haven’t heard of me. How’s civilian life suitin’ ya? You had a McDonald's yet? Or a Top Chef marathon?”

[aliasinvestigates-blog]

bewarexthexbatman:

“You realize i own this train company right? and i would have listened if you hand acted so rudely”Bruce stretched before moving slightly to the side and giving the other a bad look 

"WOW - REALLY? I own a pair of Mickey Mouse boxers and a lifetime supply of loathing for rich, entitled morons. Now we’ve finished comparing dick sizes, can I sit?” 

[aliasinvestigates-blog]

lucyinthesxy:

Karolina popped up from her seat as she watched the guy stir, able to tell from his glance that he was not very happy. “Here, you can have my seat,” she said, flashing the woman a bright smile. “I get off in a couple of stops, anyway.”

JESS WANTED TO SAY NO because she was stubborn as hell and this ass deserved to get what was comin’ to him. Unfortunately for her, the rest of the carriage was watching them, and declining this lady’s offer for the sake of causing a bigger scene ( and pissing off more people ) would probably get her lynched. “You sure?” she said, “I REALLY don’t mind kicking him some more.” 

[aliasinvestigates-blog]

old-man-logan-x:

“I respect other people don't bullshit me, Quit calling my gramps I ain’t that old.” He nodded at her plans for the evening.  “Sounds like you know how to party.” he frowned when she insulted his taste in smokes “These are Cubans thank you very much they’re for classy people.” He smirked  “Cap isn’t that bad to work with. Just has the Declaration of Independence shoved up his ass. “

JESS SNORTED, this guy was alright. Sure, he was weird and smelt of tobacco, but at least he was straight-talking and unmoved by her insults. It made life a hell of a lot easier when people didn’t punch her. “You know him, yeah?” she asked, pretty sure the dude was off his head ( a side effect of getting old, she thought, chuckling at what she knew his response would be to that ).  “You and Captain America smoke Cubans together, talkin’ bout the good old days?”

[aliasinvestigates-blog]

daisy-quaking-johnson:

“Yeah.” She probably shouldn’t have mentioned that part to a complete stranger. Part of her thought that maybe you could blast holes in your ceiling, but no, the only ways she could think of now were her powers, explosives, or big guns, none of which were typically seen as anything good. Crap. There wasn’t really an excuse to come up with there. She really needed to learn when to shut her mouth. She chuckled. “Maybe if there had been anyone around who was drunk as me, I would have. Instead, I got the idea in my head that my kitchen needed a skylight. It’s not as big of a deal as it sounds, and I don’t mean I actually blasted a hole, just that I broke a part of the ceiling open.” She had definitely blasted it , but she figured that it’d make the situation more uncomfortable if she told the whole truth.

THE CHICK WAS LYING, Jess could figure out that much. It was her job to find liars when they didn’t want to be found, but the stranger looked harmless enough. She committed ‘ ceiling-blasting, bleeding lady ’ to memory, just in case someone came looking, but didn’t push the subject further – despite the growing itch to investigate. “Well, shit. Remind me to make a swift exit if I ever end up in the same bar as you. Though, you don’t look the type to get into trouble often,” It was true; despite the BLOOD and the BLASTING, she was still ... polite, which was more than could be said for Jess. “Piss someone off?” she asked, indicating to the scars.

[aliasinvestigates-blog]

thecanaryxlance:

“Yeah” Sara nodded “well, usually it’s more punching but there’s definitely some kicking too” the blonde shrugged, she’d lost count of how many bar fights she’d broken up at work, and that was just her normal job, if she counted her other job the number would be a lot higher.

JESS preferred to use her fists, too; jeans weren’t the best choice for swinging her legs into the air, and she left moves like THAT to the Karate Kid experts. Jess just fought to get shit done, not show off, and this lady looked like she might agree. “And how often do you punch people?”

[aliasinvestigates-blog]

lancelot-hunter:

Hunter hid behind the counter as the woman threw yet another bottle at him. “I swear, I don’t even know that woman! I’ve never met her before in my life.” He looked up over the counter to see if she was still throwing things. “And that is a serious waste of decent alcohol.”

DESPITE what some people might say, Jess was good at being subtle when she needed to be. Today, though, all she had to do was find whatever that mafia asshole had hidden in one of these bottles, and no one was gonna get in the way of a girl smashing glass. Finally, a vintage single malt ( dusty bottle, heavenly smell ) released a small slip of paper with an address on. She sighed, pushed her crazed hair out of her face, and then shrugged at the mess surrounding her. She REALLY wanted a drink; too bad she’d smashed all the good ones. “You wanna share some un-decent alcohol?” she asked, a little breathless, “or have you called the cops already?” 

[flashbastardsramblings]

I relate to Jessica Jones, because, I, too, wear always the same outfit, have four friends and hate the human population with a burning passion.

[ravenclairee]

They say everyone’s born a hero. But if you let it, life will push you over the line until you’re the villain. Problem is, you don’t always know that you’ve crossed that line.

[aliasinvestigates-blog]

daisy-quaking-johnson:

Daisy shook her head. “Maybe for a little while, it does. After that, you tend to end up blasting a hole in your ceiling…  though now that I think about it, that probably is just a me thing.” She shrugged and waved away the drink. “No thanks. I appreciate the offer though.” Now looking at the girl when she was more awake, she looked familiar somehow. Maybe there was a SHIELD file on her somewhere that Daisy read once. There were too many people to keep up with really, but she tried her best. She didn’t stare too long though, not wanting to be rude. 

“Blasting a hole in the ceiling?” Now Jess was looking at her. Shit, she was either sat beside a gun-freak or a freaky-freak ( and, whatever, she was a freaky-freak, too, but she tried her damn hardest to stay away from any blasting ). “You know most people just vomit or fuck someone they shouldn’t. Unless you did one of those rough enough to cave the roof in.” Hey, she’d been there. 

[aliasinvestigates-blog]

thecanaryxlance:

Sara had to admit after having access to League resources taking the subway was something it had taken her a while to get used to, she didn’t have those resources anymore and she had to keep a low profile, so now she took the subway. She was leaning against the window, one foot up on her seat, which she used to push the guy sleeping on the seats next to her off them when a woman complained about him taking up the seats. Looking at the other woman she just shrugged in a ops manner.

Jess looked at the woman for a moment, then shrugged. Job done. Whatever. She slid onto the seat and shoved the dude’s shoulder with her boot for extra legroom. He grunted. “Nicely done,” she said instead of thank you, “d’you kick people in public often?”

[aliasinvestigates-blog]

ofblackwidows:

Natasha was not in the mood for assholes. Well, she never really was but this week was already starting out to be a shit show. When the woman spoke up, Nat flashed her a smirk, her gaze turning back to the man. He removed his sunglasses, shifting in his position to sit up and granting the brunette some space “You ARE one of them.” he whispered and Natasha shook her head. “Be more mindful next time.” He nodded, got off at the next stop and Nat moved to sit beside the woman. “I am.” She held out her hand. “Natasha.You are?” Now that the government was forcing Widow to register, Natasha had no reason to hide. She’s use the same spiel she used on everyone. “Retired now but many are.”

“You look a little young to be retired,” Jess said, but she was hardly one to talk, she’d barely even started. Jess wasn’t sure how she felt about the hero business; the costumes were embarrassing and she wasn’t peachy-keen on the structural damage, but she had to give kudos to Natasha’s notoriety. The woman had skills. “You guys all take the subway, now? ‘Cause I’m not above most things, but even I’d reconsider kickin’ the green guy off my seat.”

[aliasinvestigates-blog]

old-man-logan-x:

“Who you callin grandpa ya old bag.” he snarled he didn’t look that bad. He blew more smoke but this time away from her face so he could a good luck at the crazy SOB bugging him. Did no one really recognize him? “Being a damn hero used to mean something round here.”  he heard her speak and smiled “I like your guts kid.” He made room for her out of respect for how bold she was

“You certainly changed your tone, gramps,” Jess sniped, but she sat down anyway. “I don’t give a shit about heroes,” she added, “I’d kick Captain Assflag off a seat that he didn’t need. The only thing I give a shit about right now is getting home and drinking ‘til I fall asleep.” Despite herself, she felt a little bad; perhaps the guy was a veteran, a homeless veteran. Then again, the dude could afford cigars. “You really smoke that crap?” she asked, “you know hipsters have switched to vaping now if you wanna keep up with the kids.”

[aliasinvestigates-blog]

daisy-quaking-johnson:

“Yep, that’s exactly what happened. Got into a fight with a flight of stairs. You can never win those. I’d rather nap afterwards than just drink through the pain anyways.” She shot back sarcastically, though without any really bite to it. She was too tired for that. She really did need that nap. The last time she had really gotten much sleep was when she had been knocked out drunk and Bobbi had taken her to her house. Daisy noticed the woman spreading out, but it wasn’t anything she wasn’t used to. She just scooted over a bit more to give her more room. Daisy was a small person and didn’t really take up that much room in the first place.

Jess closed her eyes and considered the woman’s words. Maybe she could nap away the headache, or maybe she’d wake up and have another bottle of jack anyway, so why wait? The woman gave her the room Jess had rudely conquered and looked undisturbed by the events. Clearly, she’d woken up on the right side of the train cart. “Drink helps,” Jess muttered, after a while. The silence was getting to her. She was fidgety. “You want some?” She waved her hip-flask in the general direction of the woman, not looking at her.

[aliasinvestigates-blog]

big mood

big mood

[aliasinvestigates-blog]

old-man-logan-x:

“go fuck yourself” Logan puffed on his cigar as he eyed the stranger. He was bloody and bruised and just got kicked out of bar and really didn’t have time for anyone's shit.  “I’ve had long fucking night and I’m gonna sleep it off.” as he said this his new black eye finally started to heal some and his vision cleared up a bit.”You got two good legs use em and walk away.”

“And you got two good legs on two good seats with my name on them, grandpa,” Jess said, and huffed when she saw the cigar between his fingers. Nobody smoked cigars these days unless they were trying to look like a hack pimp with no taste. “You’re not the only one who’s had a long night, so move your feet or I’ll rip ‘em off for you so that you can stay lying on this train forever.”

[aliasinvestigates-blog]

ofblackwidows:

Driving through the city wasn’t exactly the brightest of ideas and today, Natasha was due to be in Harlem in about an hour or so. She opted to take the train,already annoyed by the crowds and Jesus Christ, the delays. MTA needs to get their act together. She leaned against the closed doors of her train car, observing the man that was taking up the majority of the seat, rolling her eyes at his defiance. “Hey, okay…you heard her. Move.” She wasn’t going to take anyone’s shit today, not when she was too tired to function.

The last thing Jess expected was support from a fellow commuter. The subway rule has always been say something dickish or say nothing at all but, Christ, everywhere Jess turned these days she saw strangers uniting to fight a common cause. Thank fuck this ‘cause’ was just a douche on a train. “Listen to redhead over there,” Jess said, only glancing back for a millisecond at the other woman. Then she squinted, turning slowly to look again. This redhead was familiar – way too familiar to be zooming around underground with certain ‘heroes’ that sometimes forget to shower for five days. “Buddy I’d definitely consider moving,” she said, still looking at Natasha Freakin’ Romanova, “I pack a mean punch but redhead here could probably cut your balls off with her eyelashes. You’re her, right? One of them?”