This one’s for @voidtakeyou who begged nicely for it.
His phone should have been belching flames and burning through his hand. Alistair wiped off his forehead, honestly expecting to find sweat there as he read through her latest string of highly naughty texts. How could she even put these things into words without combusting on the spot?
Digging into his shoulder, he tried to think of a sexy response. Then a witty one. As the seconds ticked by, her winking emoji waiting for something Alistair settled for any response. “You wouldn’t believe how hard I am.” Cheesy, but that was his repertoire, so he ended it with a cheese emoji.
Her response was almost instantaneous, “Prove it.”
“Okay. Not certain how. Perhaps I can find myself a notary…”
The little blue box taunted him. Take a pic? A pic of…oh. Oh!
His thumbs poised above the screen, ready to unleash a great joke at his expense when he whipped his head back to the living room. Why not do as she asked? With his phone crammed in his teeth for safe keeping, Alistair yanked off his belt. It and his jeans crashed to the floor.
The boxers soon followed forming a trail of clothing towards his living room. Good thing he lived on an upper floor apartment or all the people walking past to the chemists would get a lovely view of his ass right now.
Spitting out his phone, he yanked his shirt off over his head, the last piece of the puzzle landing on the floor. Fully naked, Alistair worked quick. With his handy twisty lamp acquired cheap out of a box, he aimed the bottom light towards his leather couch. He tried to balance his phone on the upturned lampshade but it kept falling down into the bulb.
An idea struck him and with two rubber bands he tied his phone up good onto the lampshade itself. There was a minor bending to the shade, but his phone look unharmed. A bit ready for some naughty rope play itself though.
Focus. He fluffed up his pillows, creating an incline for his back. Hurling himself onto the couch. With one leg draped to the floor, he eyed up his trouser-less anaconda — ready for its close-up and then some — when he looked at the phone. The reverse image was showing him a lovely view of the top of his head and the ceiling.
Leaping back to the lamp, he twisted it around. For a beat, he made a rectangle with his fingers, trying to eye up the perfect angle. There! Alistair arranged himself back on the couch when another idea struck him. Fumbling for the coffee table, he yanked up a red rose and placed it in his jaws.
What to do with the hands? Uh…
Put them behind his head! His elbows strained higher, helping him to elongate his body and bring out all those muscley bits she’d rave about. Flexed a few of them too.
It was perfect. Now just to…take this damn picture.
With a smile wrapped around the rose stem, Alistair raised his foot higher off the couch. Just out of view of the camera he fumbled with his reach. His thighs started to shake from the stretch, the smile straining, when he finally bumped his big toe into the screen. A still image of him, Red Dragon and all, froze on his phone.
He moved to sit up, intending to take a few more just in case, when someone knocked on his door. Alistair spun on the couch, well aware he was in the all-together. He expected the solicitors to move on, maybe shove some menus under the gap, but the doorknob began to turn.
Yelping, Alistair moved to jam a pillow over his incriminating crotch area, when the door burst open to reveal the goddess of his affections. She whipped her head around wildly as if hunting for something. When her eyes landed upon him, nude and still clinging to the pillow, she smiled.
Her hands already yanking off her top, she said, “You took too long.”
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