name's eden and adress is 221B baker street

she/her | i have way too many hcs and way too many fandoms

[allthemarrowoflife]

yeah, i'm a she/her but like. not in a cis way. i'm a she/her in a crowley in eden way. and in the flood. and in the crucifixion. a she/her in a loki in lady form and in snake form way. a she/her in a charlie nuwanda dalton wearing lipstick way. a she/her in a long-haired viktor wrapped in a blue blanket way. a she/her in a muse from a hozier song way. a she/her in a battleship way. i'm a she/her in a "entity of vague and indistinct gender who happens to feel their cuntiest in feminine form" way. yk?

[lookingfornighttime]

all human emotions can be found either in the mamma mia soundtrack or the hozier album

[allthemarrowoflife]

if i had a nickel for every time i became too emotionally attached to a gay angel in a beige trenchcoat who's in love with his moody best friend, helps said best friend stop the apocalypse in the name of humanity, becomes a kind parental figure to the (supposed or actual) child of lucifer and makes stupid but brave life decisions, i'd have two nickels. which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice, right?

[allthemarrowoflife]

classic good omens x ofmd. it's the age of piracy. crowley's in blackbeard's crew ("he's cool and scary") and aziraphale is in the gentleman pirate's ("he's kind and keeps books!"). they decide to play matchmakers for their miserable friends, except it backfires astronomically. the captains pull a Teen Beach Movie and crush on them instead. ed makes heart eyes at aziraphale. stede blushes when crowley talks. panic ensues. lucius is laughing im the background cause my man Knows Everything.

[allthemarrowoflife]

listen listen listen i know that most people who are not endgame jily are endgame jegulus because my boy james potter became obsessed with the same two people at 12 years old and never changed his mind

but what if he. didn't. like sure, if lily or reg told him to bark he'd go "woof" cause he's gone for people who are mean to him.

but he's james fucking potter. i refuse to believe he never dated anyone else.

SO HERE'S MY PROPOSITION

lily starts hanging out with this slytherin girl, pandora lovegood, they're girlfriends, and along comes pandora's queerplatonic partner, xeno, a ravenclaw.

and james looks at this person, all long white blond hair and big blue eyes who's always saying some weird shit about creatures no one's ever heard about before, who wears flowy skirts even when people make fun of them and too many necklaces and big earrings and whose patronus is apparently a fucking moth and goes "i've only had xeno for a day but if anything happened to them i would kill everyone in this room and then myself"

no one even knows their surname, only pandora, because mcgonnagal never calls them anything other than "xenophilius" just like she only ever calls sirius "sirius", so james figures there must be something going on there and that only makes him more invested cause my man never met a fucked up person he didn't want to fix.

he starts hanging out with xeno even when pandora is not around and waves at them across the halls and listens dutifully while they rent about nargles or something, mind wandering about how the sunlight hits their hair just right and makes it shine in gold or how the blue of their eyes matches the early spring skies (he's sappy like that, leave him alone)

the other marauders are slowly freaking out about this cause james is bringing this person over to the common room and helping then look for their shoes and SINCE WHEN IS JAMES POTTER EVER INTERESTED IN ANYONE OUTSIDE OF THEIR INNER CIRCLE.

meanwhile, james is freaking out himself. he really likes xeno and would like to ask them out but he's in a queerplatonic relationship with pandora? so maybe that means he's not interest in romantic relationships? and does james even care if it's romantic or not at this point if that means xeno will hold his hand and blush when he smiles at them from the qudditch pitch?

but because he is james fucking potter, he does what he always does. jumps in with no plan whatsoever and hopes for the best.

"hey, xeno, listen. i would really like to take you to hogsmead this weekend. it doesn't have to be a date, i don't even know if you're comfortable with doing The Dating so i won't imply this is us doing The Dating, but maybe we could just talk and maybe..."

and then xeno asks to kiss him (jamespotter.exe has stopped working) and promptly says that just because they don't do The Dating with pandora, it doesn't mean they can't do The Dating with someone else.

lily and pandora are watching from behind a pillar and giggling triumphantly. this was their plan all along.

[allthemarrowoflife]

okay listen LISTEN. we all know the theory that crowley was raphael before he Fell, right? what if. WHAT IF. gabriel didn't go to the bookshop looking for aziraphale after losing all his memories.

he was looking for raphael, cause he knew even subconsciously that crowley would be there. the whole "everything will be alright if you are near one particular person" speech is him talking about his brother (if you're down with the idea that all the archangels were created together), who has been fallen for millenia but is the only thing he can vaguely recall.

LOOK ME IN THE EYES AND TELL ME THIS SHIT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE.

[allthemarrowoflife]

AND AND AND. aziraphale trying to find out a way to help gabriel, who just says "i'm looking for my brother". so he tries to summon the archangel raphael, even though he knows the guy has been missing since the Revolution, only for crowley to disappear from the street in a cloud of lighting and reappear inside his summoning circle in the shop.

[allthemarrowoflife]

okay listen LISTEN. we all know the theory that crowley was raphael before he Fell, right? what if. WHAT IF. gabriel didn't go to the bookshop looking for aziraphale after losing all his memories.

he was looking for raphael, cause he knew even subconsciously that crowley would be there. the whole "everything will be alright if you are near one particular person" speech is him talking about his brother (if you're down with the idea that all the archangels were created together), who has been fallen for millenia but is the only thing he can vaguely recall.

LOOK ME IN THE EYES AND TELL ME THIS SHIT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE.

[allthemarrowoflife]

we all know lightwood siblings come in sets of three (and one of them ends up dead) so i'm just gonna sit here and wait for magnus and alec to materialise a third child out of thin air in the last tec book

[allthemarrowoflife]

if you cannot understand how much good omens is a queer love story maybe that's because their queer love story is not for you to understand. it's ineffable.

[allthemarrowoflife]

don't get me wrong, i love the multiple variations of human names we give aziraphale when he needs to blend in but i also. would love if he just picked something very common and painfully british. like james or edward, the gay kings of england.

[allthemarrowoflife]

the curves of my shell

rewrite history

ideal venter

in the darkest of ages

muse thighs

under florentine brushes

blessed waist

from aphrodite's sculptures

guiding hips

to viking odysseys

embellished arms

beneath roman pride

how could I ever hate

a body that carries millenia

- original, 2023

[allthemarrowoflife]

high infidelity is 100% alastair to charles in paris after his days with thomas i can't unhear it

[allthemarrowoflife]

alternatively, better than revenge is thomas about charles at the academy when he finds out this grown ass man is talking to alastair, who is stupidly falling head over heels

[allthemarrowoflife]

high infidelity is 100% alastair to charles in paris after his days with thomas i can't unhear it

[allthemarrowoflife]

historicallymercurial >>>>>> allthemarrowoflife

[allthemarrowoflife]

sirius learned to cook with euphemia. remus learned to bake with hope. so in 1994 when harry moved in with them into remus' remote old cottage in wales (that's what happened, stfu) the three of them made it a point to heal harry's relationship with homemade meals.

for starters, he was never alone.

in the morning, while sirius took care of the overgrown garden outside, harry and remus would gather around hope's old cookbook and choose the dessert for the day. even if remus tried to tell harry he could choose any recipe he liked, he insisted on minding the man's sensory issues and always picked something he knew wasn't too different a flavour or texture. dessert chosen, they started baking. as in, covered the room and themselves with flour and then managed to actually put something in the oven.

this was sirius's favourite time of the day, because he spent so long missing the sound of laughter and now everyday he got to hear it, loud and clear, from the people he loved the most as he sat under the kitchen window plucking weeds from the earth.

then lunch time came. remus would sit at the kitchen table, legs up on a chair and a book on his lap that he didn't actually have any intention of reading, and watch as sirius cooked and harry obediently fetched him ingredients and utensils.

amongst the chaos of sirius yelling and harry sprinting and laughing, remus would joke about how much they looked like surgeons standing over their critical patient, Mr Stew.

at dinner, it was a much calmer affair. harry, who's making a point to read through remus's whole stack of muggle books from his childhood, is probably already keeping his eyes open by force of will alone, so his godfathers sit him on the counter and just ask him to read the recipe aloud for them.

later they'll sit around in the living room and put a record on, but they all know it's just an excuse to spend a little more time together because, deep down, none of them believe this whole domestic family dream is going to last very long.

[allthemarrowoflife]

steve's taken so many hits to the head and the eyes that at this point my boy definitely needs full time glasses. he tries so hard to not look like a dad or a librarian but it is physically impossible. at least he still looks hot.

[allthemarrowoflife]

one of the few things that bother me about the good omens fandom is how crowley is almost always portrayed as someone who doesn't like books or reading????? i mean, i get that he has an AestheticTM to uphold and the whole point is him being aziraphale's polar opposite

but that little shit literally Fell from Heaven and Grace because he questioned too much. he was the one who Tempted humanity to eat the Forbidden Fruit from the Tree of Knowledge so they would be able to think for themselves

yeah he tells that firefighter he doesn't look like he owns a bookshop. cause he's a goth twink who only knows the colours black and red. BUT BOOKS ARE THE ULTIMATE SYMBOLS OF THE KNOWLEDGE, FREE THINKING AND QUESTIONING HE'S SO DEVOTED TO. HOW CAN YOU TELL ME THAT MF DOESN'T READ???

anyways this is me preaching the Secret Bookworm Crowley Agenda