Will's Blog

Hellooooo I'm Will. 21 🖤 he/it/xe frequently posting about cripple punk, bpd and general things I find cool

[cyberciderot]

lett it bleed

[alwaysminiatureking]

Today I Will Graham'd too close to the sun, had a panic attack, and told my boyfriend he's not real. Send help

[alwaysminiatureking]

Nobody talks about what it's like to be so full of hate when all you wish for is to love. I hate being trans. I hate my mind. I hate coveting people's lives. I hate that dancing makes me unbelievably happy but I'm disabled and I just can't anymore. I hate saying I'm alone/lonely when I have the most wonderful husband the world could ask for. I hate having no friends but I hate having them because they hurt me. I hate being alone. I hate hating. I want to love. Let me love. Please.

[alwaysminiatureking]

So sick of people giving condolences and thinking I'm an inspiration just cuz I have a wheelchair. It's not that big of a deal. Chill, ffs

[alwaysminiatureking]

Today I hung out with my mom for the first time in nearly ten years. It wasn't fun. I didn't realise how sheltered from abled, straight and neurotypical people I was. I explained I got diagnosed with PTSD and she said "who doesn't these days?". I'm sorry?? What?? She kept walking ahead of me even tho I'm disabled and have a cane. I explained I need a wheelchair for longer trips and I got a weird look of disgust??? She asked "what would you say if someone told you they have split personality and schizophrenia?" I said ".....cool" and she started laughing like I was being sarcastic??? Then goes on about this person and says they start fights on purpose and the next second they're fine. I explained "people with bpd usually start fights when they're craving the attention that they feel they're not getting" and she said "exactly!! She's so attention seeking!!"..........that's not what I meant. Now her new boyfriend is tryna get her to call me every day and hang out with me once a week.. I appreciate you want your girlfriend to talk to her kid but as disrespectfully as possible.. I don't wanna talk to the woman to keeps faking being raped (I'm not victim blaming, she's been to prison for it and admitted she lied) and faked breast cancer. Idk what to do tbh 😭

[cyberciderot]

slowly dragging myself out of the pit there is hope :3

[alwaysminiatureking]

Tw for disabled rant time

Does anyone else just feel completely useless? I sit in my bed and occasionally walk to the bathroom with my partner/carers supervision. I have no friends. I don't have the money or physical/mental ability to go outside. I don't cook. I don't clean. I hide, unshowered, in my disgusting bed. Why can't I experience the world like I so badly wanted to in childhood?? I feel powerless tbh

[alwaysminiatureking]

Drew Jolteon holding a snom because snom is my favourite Pokémon and Jolteon is my partner's :3 also there's hardly any fan art of either :c

[alwaysminiatureking]

Rant warning for anyone in a fragile headspace rn!!

So, I'm disabled - physically and mentally. I worked really hard to get appropriate aids for free because I don't have the money and was actually able to get them which I'm very grateful for. I have a stool for the kitchen, a toilet frame and shower stool. I live in a shared house (homeless charity, I don't choose my roommates) and a new guy moved in recently. Every roommate I've had has been HORRIBLE, think of the worse roommate possible - they're worse than that. But they've never touched my aids which I'm very thankful for. Today I learned through my support worker that my new roommate was cleaning the shared bathroom - cool. Or so I thought. After many hours I finally have the energy to go to the bathroom. I walk in and to my absolute horror.. my aids have been moved. Not just moved.. the shower stool is blocking the sink and is covered with toothbrushes, toothpaste, shower gel, everything. And my toilet frame is moved across the room and replaced with a bin. I feel really really sad and disrespected. They weren't in the way!! They were put near where they need to go but not in abled people's way. Now I can't use either of my bathroom aids without hurting myself which goes entirely against their purpose!! And as for my kitchen stool, I put it way out of people's way and it has been moved. Used. Not by me. I feel so disrespected right now and I don't know how to approach it because I feel like he's just gonna kick off??? What do I do?? And for the abled people reading, please don't move/use others aids without asking. I really hope he hasn't touched or damaged my wheelchair, that was so expensive :c

[alwaysminiatureking]

Let's create a thread of disabled monster high headcanons because it's wonderful for disabled people to be able to see themselves in characters <3

I'll start!! I headcanon Draculaura as having bpd and ehlers danlos syndrom <3

[alwaysminiatureking]

Someone needs to give me a surefire way to motivate myself to shower 😭 no matter what I find ways to get out of it. I have a water phobia, shower trauma and fibromyalgia so I find it very difficult to shower. I've got a shower stool, I have my boyfriend in the room to distract me, I've tried nice smells, I have a set day that I do so, I still can't get myself to do it. I never feel clean enough, it feels like a punishment and I have no idea why. I hate myself for it. So if you guys could help that'd be great!! You can save your judgement cuz I am already so ashamed to admit it. Please just find it in your heart to help me

[cyberciderot]

brand ***new*** cybercide song out at midnight 'early grave' featuring my brother @fvckgrim number one smash hit cyber heaven mixtape coming february :))))))

[alwaysminiatureking]

I really recommend checking it out if you want new music!!

[cyberciderot]

me n my brother @fvckgrim working hella hard on this music stuff 4 your brand new ipod, would mean so much 2 us if u gave us a few minutes 2 check out our silly little songs<3 (⁠✿⁠^⁠‿⁠^⁠)(⁠✿⁠^⁠‿⁠^⁠)

thank u for reading x

[cyberciderot]

[alwaysminiatureking]

Trans men!! I need help!! I've been wanting to try t supplements for cis men cuz I'm pre-t and dysphoric but I've googled and it (big surprise) doesn't recommend it. Has anyone here tried it or know anything about it? I'm very curious to learn other people's experience!!

[alwaysminiatureking]

Dear transition gods, PLEASE let me wake up tomorrow and look like Will Graham 😭

[alwaysminiatureking]

Autistic people show me your current comfort item!! Infodump if you wish!!! :)

This is Clownie!! He has a key on his back which you can turn and his head moves and he plays a soothing song!! I love him. He helps so much when I'm sad or panicking