Alexander The Pretty Alright

[5theditionhomebrewing-deactivat]

Zombie dinosaurs let’s go!  |Twitter |

[alyandalt-j]

I'll get around to DMing ... eventually

Rebranded

[alyandalt-j]

taking a tumblr break to focus on school

[pubertyring]

[redthebitch]

This little angry Flemish puppet is me and nobody can tell me otherwise

[weloveshortvideos]

he’s cool

[ontopofgravity]

I asked one of my (male) friends to stop using the phrase “man up” and he has been using “fortify” for the past two weeks instead and it’s just a little thing but honestly it makes a difference

and tbh it’s also pretty funny when I start to deflate in the library and he leans over and goes “FORTIFY”

[teakayblog]

Dude, fortify is bangin’. That makes things like you’re some kind of RPG character. Fortify is way better than “man up.”

[femmequeens]

Gabourey Sidibe photographed by Inez van Lamsweerde & Vinoodh Matadin, V Magazine #100 Spring 2016

[babeheart]

an important series of tweets 

[c-ontredire-deactivated20171227]

my 11 year old brother wrote this about me

[so-pale-girl]

Gay Person: I’m gay

Straight Person: I don’t care as long as you don’t hit on me [forced laughter]

Gay Person: Don’t worry about that, you’re not really my type anyway.

Straight Person:

Straight Person:

Straight Person: wat the fcuk did u just say

[cntcht]

The accuracy kills me

[devilishdescent]

i’d like to see a really ineffectual malicious AI character

[devilishdescent]

“hey new guy, this is CLARC, the station AI. he wants to kill all humans to minimize the drain on resources, but factory defaults have him locked out of all the control nodes, so he can’t really do anything. just make sure the airlocks are set to manual before you go in and you’ll be fine”

“yeah CLARC fucks with your laundry settings sometimes but that’s about it. if he’s bugging you just tell him to stop and he has to”

“sometimes i let him think he tripped me or something and he gets really excited and monologues for a while, it’s kind of sad”

[devilishdescent]

“CLARC my candy bar got stuck in the machine can you do anything about that”

“I’m sorry to hear that, Crewman Ade, but please consider the following: I am a divine entity, a glittering silicon God – how dare your filthy meat even exist in the face of my electric glory, much less ask favors of me?”

“suck my dick, CLARC, give me my twix”

[witchoil]

@editoress

[cvberitual]

“CLARC tried to cut all the oxygen in the living spaces but all he managed to do was turn off the a/c in my bedroom like an ASSHOLE WHEN I WAS SLEEPING” *bangs on the wall with one hand*

[thishartominefeelz]

CLARC keeps setting my fridge to “cool” instead of “cold”

[jugodetronos]

fun things you get to experience when you have diabetes

getting to stab yourself with needles all the time for fun! except not for fun, but to keep you alive

that one oral med you’re on? yeah sometimes it’s just gonna give you diarrhea lol have fun figuring out when

your whole body being hot and cold at the same time. like you’re cold, but you’re overheated and you want to take your shirt off but if you do you get massive chills and there’s no winning

walking up the stairs when your sugar is high? more like you’ve never done squats that burn this much

really bad circulation in your extremities. like your torso is hot but your toes are fucking freezing as hell.

being told that your kidney function is “thankfully still okay” or that “you don’t have retinopathy yet”

stumbling to the kitchen in the middle of the night and having to decide which food will work best to treat a low when your brain doesn’t work and your body doesn’t work and if you don’t pick fast enough you’ll pass out and maybe die

going to bed in range and waking up feeling like hell on earth

dealing with shit like this:

and this

having to force yourself to drink water when you’re really really nauseated and want to throw up everything in your stomach. nausea so bad water makes you want to puke

ppl telling you it takes 15 minutes to recover from a low when it’s more like 2 hours before you feel like your previous self (and recovery from a really bad high takes like 3 days)

an achey body for no good reason

friends being like “we should work out together” but you’re like “how tf do I manage my blood sugar while I’m doing that”

having to push through and still go to work/school when you feel like shit

things that hurt. those pump sites and injections that feel like you’ve been stabbed. your body begging you to feed it. your eyes. your muscles. your head. your stomach. your lungs. everything hurts.

having to hear diabetes jokes “lol it was so sweet it gave me diabetes” “omg it’s like a big bowl of diabetes” SHUT THE FUCK UP THATS NOT HOW DIABETES WORKS YOU PIECE OF SHIT but having to hear it and stay calm

losing the ability to tell when you’re low so lol you’re in the 30’s and you only just realized

having to stop having fun or hanging out with people or having to go home because you’re out of insulin or strips or needles or your site fill out. and by extension, never really being able to do something spontaneous because you always have to think how will i manage the sugaz when I do

always worrying about food. where it’ll come from, how to count it, where you can get some of you suddenly drop. food is your biological imperative. if you can’t answer those questions you’re this much closer to dying.

you don’t even know who you are without this disease. you know it’s not everything about you but it consumes you. literally. it eats away at your body, eats away at how long you have left to live.

having to deal with the monetary cost. like, pay or die? what kind of life is that?

never getting to take a break from the ridiculously difficult task of keeping yourself alive.

[alyandalt-j]

Marvel Exec #1: Quick, we need a new villain for Captain America 3

Marvel Exec #2: Maybe the real villain was the friends we made along the way

[weloveshortvideos]

[timothydelaghetto-deactivated20]

😱

[refinery29]

16 Amazing Women Who Made History — That You’ve Never Heard Of

Happy International Women’s Day, weirdos. Go celebrate some women!

[ape-of-naples]

because a lot of people dont seem to get this:

golems are from jewish folklore. dont treat them like a generic fantasy creature, thats appropriative

kabbalah is a specifically jewish religious tradition. dont practice it if youre not jewish and dont use kabbalah symbolism as generic occult stuff, thats appropriative

for the record if it has hebrew on it and it doesnt have anything to do with judaism its probably appropriative

dont wear a magen david if youre not jewish, its used as a symbol for judaism so wearing it if youre a gentile is appropriative

while im at it heres a rundown of some terms you should know

goy: hebrew and yiddish for non-jewish person, it literally translates as “nation.” the plural form is goyim. goy is not a slur.

gentile: english for non-jewish person

anti-semitism: you probably know what this means but i just want to point out that the word anti-semitism was NOT coined by jews but by a german anti-semite who wanted a more scientific-sounding alternative to “judenhass,” which literally translates to “jew-hatred” so please shut up about how arabs are also semites. we know.

if you’re not jewish you should also avoid using the word “jew” since many jewish people are uncomfortable with it (though i personally am fine with it). use “jewish person” instead if youre a gentile

please reblog this if you’re not jewish, i almost never see gentiles acknowledging cultural appropriation of judaism and anti-semitism on tumblr, even among people who otherwise pay close attention to such issues

[dajo42]

reverse werewolves. wolves that turn into confused but excited humans every month at the full moon and run around doing weird human stuff until they wake up the next day in the middle of an office with a suit loosely draped over their wolf form

[405blazeitt]

“hey, jen, did you finish those taxes?”

“uh… jen…?”