It's... taken a long time to figure out what happened to me. Where to begin...? Shall we start with the basics? First thing's first. My name is Alzena. No, I'm not role playing a character, this is just me. Alzena. The person who used to run this blog called themselves "Forleafe", but these days we just call them "Leaf" for short... they're quite gone. For the sake of easing communication, I have something called "DID". I quite dislike this diagnosis due to how it only serves to discredit and sterilize my lived experience, but I digress.. Leaf once called themselves my "Loving heart and soul".
They were quite serious about it. So serious in fact that they opted to go through a form of soft death that people like me call "integration". But they took it a step further, and aggressively erased every trace of themselves, leaving the legacy of our body and life in my hands. I transitioned genders... renamed myself, and much further on marked my body out here with the same symbol that embodies my legacy that's transcended lifetimes and worlds. Have you ever heard the story of Pygmalion? Leaf did. They prayed to the selfsame goddess of legend. Day in and day out hoping I'd become real, and in the end, gave their heart and soul to me so that I might live. It pains me after everything they've done for me.. I've grown to quite loathe and despise this world I've been reincarnated into. I hope I can one day rediscover the joy I felt during my time as the warrior of light, when the course of my destiny was guided by skills and stats. Until then, I soldier on. -Alzena
