this is an important PSA for people born with vaginas. and it is important for people born with penises too because they should learn these things too
SEX ISN’T SUPPOSED TO HURT. (more specifically I mean vaginal penetration isn’t supposed to hurt.)
FORGET ALL THE LIES YOU LEARNED IN HEALTH CLASS.
NO, your vagina isn’t too small and NO, the reason you can’t insert tampons/fingers into your vagina without experiencing pain isn’t because you are a virgin.
If you can’t insert fingers and/or tampons into your vagina without it hurting then a penis sure as hell isn’t going to be any different.
If you try to have someone penetrate you with their penis it causes you great pain THEN STOP IMMEDIATELY. CONTINUING WILL ONLY CAUSE MORE PAIN AND MAKE IT WORSE. (And people with penises, don’t force your penis in if your partner is in pain!)
What you have is called “Vaginismus”– painful spasmodic contraction of the vagina in response to physical contact or pressure (especially in sexual intercourse).
Basically meaning your muscles tense up and make penetration impossible and extremely painful. Bet you didn’t learn that in health class, huh? Because health class is fucking useless.
Here’s an image to show you what happens–
See you black lumps? That’s your muscles tensing up and fighting against penetration. And see the lightning bolts? That symbolizes the INTENSE PAIN. This muscle response is involuntary and won’t stop no matter how aroused or relaxed you are.
And NO, this is not something that only happens to people with a history of sexual abuse. 2 in every 1000 people with vaginas have Vaginismus and that does not include the ones that go undocumented. Most people never seek help because they are embarrassed/shamed and/or think that it is normal.
BUT DON’T FRET. Vaginismus is completely “curable.” People who seek treatment have a high success rate although it may take a few weeks or sometimes years. Simply hoping for the problem to fix itself or go away will NOT work. And definitely, DEFINITELY, do NOT force yourself to have intercourse hoping that will fix it. IT WILL MAKE IT WORSE.
So if you are a virgin and think you may have Vaginismus, go seek help BEFORE you have sex so that your first time isn’t a painful experience. And if you’ve attempted sex before and have been unsuccessful then go and get help so that you can finally enjoy vaginal penetration! :)
If I’ve missed any important fact and you want to add to this post, feel free to reblog and add more information about Vaginismus! I’m sick and tired of people not being aware of this condition and people living their lives in pain!
And please reblog this and spread if like wildfire so that people suffering from this condition can know that they are not alone and that they don’t have to live their whole lives in pain.
