Andréas

• she. 20 • writer • 18+ MDNI • ON HIATUS • MASTERLIST •

[andreas-river]

6th day of Kinktober 2024

❝The place was bustling with activity on this Saturday night, and fortunately the booth you were in was in one of the corners, giving you at least some privacy. But Soap did not seem to care that you were in public, with his captain sitting right in front of him. You could feel their eyes on you, even if they couldn't see anything, but that didn't make you feel any better.❞

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An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[andreas-river]

5th day of Kinktober 2024

❝“You’re such a bad girl, bonnie.” You could hear Soap chuckle right against your ear, his warm breath making you shiver, a breathed moan leaving your swollen lips from being kissed and tortured without mercy. You weren’t sure how much time had passed, but it sure felt like hours. Your arms and legs were shaking from being on your hands and knees for a long time, your hair messy and your nerves on fire.❞

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An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[andreas-river]

4th day of Kinktober 2024

❝“Seems fun.” You giggled, making sure that your knee was still pressing against him. The pressure was insistent enough to make him exhale heavily. He was trying to control himself, but you didn’t wanted that: you wanted to free the beast inside him. “So, are we going to do this or not?”❞

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An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[andreas-river]

3rd day of Kinktober 2024

❝You had just come home from work, pressuring you to shower before taking you to the bedroom. He had arranged everything, and it was obvious that he was planning something for a long time. König knew you too well. How you buttoned your hoodie to the neck, your pants always large and never revealing.❞

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An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[andreas-river]

2nd day of Kinktober 2024

❝You grinned as you carefully observed his expression, the pleasure written all over his face as you pleasured him. [...] It was like having all the power over him, a man like him reduced at your mercy.❞

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An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[andreas-river]

1st day of Kinktober 2024

❝But this was the first time he felt more, his senses amplified, with a weird sense of longing in his chest. Because the first time with the one you really loved was going to be unforgettable, and he knew he would treasure this night every moment of his existence.❞

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An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[andreas-river]

you’re back i missed you im so excited to read your kinktober fics

Oh my god thank you so much! 😭 You don't know how much it means for me, thank you for your support <3

[andreas-river]

If anyone's interested, the preview for the Kinktober is out on my Ao3! Here will be posted previews of the chapters once October starts!

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[andreas-river]

BRO TIS NOT EVEN MIDWAY THROUGH SEP 🤧😭

LOL I know, and that's exactly why! :")

That's why I can't wait for October to start!

[andreas-river]

September has barely started, the cold weather is finally arriving and I already planned the Kinktober 2024, obviously Call of Duty themed.

I think I am going crazy.

[andreas-river]

THE PRICE OF AGONY

TW: angst, hurt/no comfort, written with f!reader in mind. And I definitely trauma dumped on this. I wrote this a long time ago inspired by the song "The Price Of Agony" by Fit For A King.

PAIRING: Nikto x F!Reader

A/N: requests are open!

Since you grew up, you knew perfectly that you should always be careful. Careful with yourself, with decisions, with friends and lovers. Those stern words pronounced by your mother repeated themselves like a broken record, reminding you of all those mistakes, guilt tripping inside your stomach and twisting your insides painfully — your heart burning still in shame.

So weak, so stupid, revealing your secret about loving someone who never dared to spare a word with you. The cup of tea Dmitry gave you was already cold between your hands, losing yourself in the reflection of the liquid. 'Never forget to drink something when you feel down', a small attempt of babysitting you after that day, still feeling everyone's eyes on you the moment you stepped inside the cafeteria, now empty and with only the ticking sound of the clock in the background, the low lights helping you blend within the darkness.

It felt good being hidden in it, far away from the spotlight — but you never imagined it would happen. She looked so trustworthy, always inviting you with others comrades at lunch and asking you so many questions — maybe that was the reason, you lowered all of your defenses in front of her, telling her that you liked someone of your squad, telling her his name with a hushed tone with your heart thumping wildly in your chest. You recalled your own words, because you still didn't know what drove you so much to him, enveloped in an enigmatic aura, with so many pieces around that made it difficult putting them together and figuring out the whole picture of the puzzle.

But why did it hurt so much?

Not even crying helped, since it only made your heart hurt even more, a weight pressing down on it and making breathing a difficult task, quiet sobs turn into loud gasps, the full cup of tea already forgotten in the table, burying your head between your knees, the same position you found yourself so many times when you were younger — and even if you were now a full grown adult, nothing changed at all.

You sink into yourself even more, closing your eyes and failing to notice the looming shadow behind the door.

He didn't move, forgetting to breathe. He felt the same too, long nights spent to cry his pain out, failing miserably as the first ray of the sun lightened his room. He, too, chose the darkness as his safest place — no one would judge, no one would see him, only his voices inside his head making the place too damn loud. He was silent, always alone, but he didn't fail to notice you, or the mess you found yourself in the other day. Everyone was talking about you, making him wish that he could shut them all up for good.

He left his room only when necessary, and tonight was an exception. He shouldn't be there listening to your cries, but he couldn't stop himself when he heard Dmitry mumbling something about making some more tea for you, since you skipped meals lately and worrying about your health. Lying to himself was impossible, facing the truth inside him, but he didn't dare to step inside. It would hurt you even more if in that moment you saw the cause of your pain right in front of your very eyes.

He once believed that love was something that one day would be part of him, but that was in the past, a past once more colorful, his days now filled in gray and sorrow. They were screaming inside his head, one of them telling him to go away and never look back, but another one to close the distance between him and your shaking form.

He didn't listen to them at all, feeling stuck in his steps for the first time. He could've done more, but he remained still with his back on the wall, with closed fists hanging at his sides, knowing too well that he did not deserve you, all of that love you had — you couldn't waste it for him anymore.

Managing to take a step further away and resolved to go back to his room, his boots stopped again when a familiar figure was standing still and watching him, the undecipherable look on Dmitry's face stopping him in his tracks.

---

You massaged your neck for the umpteenth time that morning, muscles too stiff from the uncomfortable position you fell asleep nights ago on that chair of the cafeteria, waking up only one hour later, the fragrance of the tea barely present in the air. You manage to drink it in a few sips, the cold liquid leaving a bittersweet taste on your tongue — you definitely forget to put sugar in it, putting the cup away and taking some more minutes to stretch your stiff bones.

The days passed too slowly for your liking, distractedly listening to Rodion as he talked about which tablet purchasing since his old one abandoned him to met his tragic fate, and he couldn't stop complain for a single moment — he was almost at the end of a TV serie, and he wanted to see it so bad but he couldn't anymore. You felt grateful since he didn't bring that subject at all, saving you from the shame you still felt on your skin.

That topic still burned inside you like a flame, the only thing stuck on your mind, and not even listening to Rodion's banter helped to take your mind off. If you were called on a mission, you would definitely be in big trouble, and you were pretty sure that with that unfocused mind of yours you would end up killed sooner than later — a voice in your head whispering that it wouldn't be that bad, at least you wouldn't face that shame anymore.

You shook your head — no, you shouldn't have those thoughts even if you were joking, they were a deep hole you had already closed years ago—

"You are not listening to me, aren't you?"

A new wave of shame washed over you, going back to reality and where Rodion actually stopped his complaints. He sighs, adjusting himself to fully face you, his face strangely serious as he stares at your blank expression. He barely showed his sensitive side to anyone, protected by his exuberant behavior and a smirk always plastered on his face. No one could ever imagine him to be like that.

"Why don't you talk to him?" His tone is obvious, like stating obvious facts, making you roll your eyes annoyed.

Your angry stare doesn't make him falter at all, raising his brows and crossing his arms on his chest, trying to enforce his suggestion. Maybe he was right, but how in the world you could even talk to him, his mere presence in the same room made you desire that invisibility was a real thing, and not only from some movies you saw during your childhood.

"And what should I say to him?" the lump in your throat made your words out like a whine, swallowing before continuing. "He already knows everything, because everyone knows."

"Ask him something — anything it's better than nothing." You can easily say that he was really thinking hard, his eyes lost in front of him as he was thinking of a way to help.

And it makes you actually smile, after all of those days passed alone in your room, reminding you that you weren't alone. But when you realize that it doesn't make you feel any better, somehow it was your own selfishness that made you get up, telling him that you were going to think about it, at least — one of the worst lies you've ever said in your entire life, you leave your smile behind. Maybe it's better this way, while everything will remain the same as ever — like strangers.

[marigoldpollen]

Sentimental. Groves and fields. Since he’s Russian, birch trees and cornflowers.

[andreas-river]

Kissseysht you on xheek muahmwahh

Uuuhm thanks, I suppose (￣ω￣;) ♥

[andreas-river]

LIKE WINTER

TW: none, just a small blurb that came out randomly. Not proofread. English is not my first language.

A/N: requests are open!

He was like winter.

Especially his eyes. They reminded you of the cold sky when you look out the window, when despite it’s clear and the sun's rays hit your face, you feel no warmth. The sky is clear blue, a few clouds are covering that immense mantle but it's a cold color, a chill that goes up your spine and makes you shiver.

And you can’t stop thinking about them, while covered by multiple blankets and freezing your ass off. Yet, your body refuses to heat up, the wind outside howling and making your teeth chatter uncontrollably. You try again to focus on your jaw, to clench your jaw but without success.

You still remember how when you were a kid you loved Siberia, how you always wanted to see the snow covered forests up close, or admiring the tall mountains while sipping some hot-chocolate. Now, you were in one of those mountains, inside a cold and merciless safehouse with your teammate, who was far colder than the cold season. You hear his footsteps around the room, listening to his movements as he prepares for the night. Then, he sighs heavily, and something heavy hits the floor. The steps grow closer, and now a shadow is in front of you.

Lifting your gaze, Nikto is standing tall next your sleeping bag. Despite removing his vest, he’s covered in multiple layers of clothing, and it doesn’t make him any smaller.

“Move.” He demanded, his tone of voice slightly clearer, noticing the absence of his ballistic mask. At its place, there was a simple black balaclava that uncovered only his eyes.

You pouted, but you were sure that your expression was far weirder because your teeth wouldn’t stop chattering. “Could you ask more nicely?”

“Please... move.”

You looked at him, and he stared back at you, easily holding your gaze.

“First, tell me why.”

He sighed again, this time rolling his eyes. You tried your best to engrave the memory of Nikto rolling his eyes at you, since he was usually emotionless. Most of the times, at least.

“Mine is broken. If we share yours, we won’t die tonight.”

You sat upright, smiling devilishly. “So I was right today when I noticed that there was something wrong with your bag.”

This time, he didn’t said anything in response, he just stared at you, menacingly.

So, for his sake—or for both his and yours, you moved, making space for him as he inserted himself in your sleeping bag, and he obviously occupied most of the space. Laying next to each other, you were both pressed against each other, your arms awkwardly crossed over your stomach as you both remained in silence, the only sound audible was the storm raging outside.

For minutes, you both remained still, your mind screaming at you to turn around so you would be laying on your side, with your back towards him. And it wasn’t even a bad idea, but instead, your body ignored your instructions completely, turning on your other side, facing him. The moment you moved, he was watching you from the corner of his eye, and you remained surprised when he did the same thing.

Suddenly, your teeth weren’t chattering anymore, and being face to face with him, squeezed in your own sleeping bag, wasn’t something you asked for. But you wished for it, that was certain.

“Better?”

You nodded, not trusting your voice in that moment. Looking at his eyes again, the corners had wrinkles, as if he was smiling under his balaclava.

“You’re quiet. I like that.”

You scoffed, smiling but unsure about what he meant with those words. You weren’t exactly known for “being quiet”, usually you were the exact opposite, and with the extremely expressive face you had, it was impossible to hide your thoughts or opinions. At your reaction, he flicked his fingers on your forehead, mumbling an “ow!” and shooting an angry glare at him.

But from that moment, you both didn’t said anything else, resting in silence until you both fell asleep, forgetting just for a few hours of the oncoming day, the mission you had been assigned, and the cold winter raging outside. In a crappy safehouse in the middle of a forest, you found a corner of warmth. The following morning, you didn’t asked yourself how you ended up pressed against his chest, or how you had felt his muscular arm in the middle of the night pulling you close, the warmth of his body instantly seeping through your bones. And that, made your winter a bit more warm.

[andreas-river]

YIPPIEE POOKIE'S BACK!! TAKE AS MUCH TIME AS YOU NEED <33

Oh thank you so much! 🥹

I am so fucking nervous and I don't even know if it's going to work, but I can only hope for the best 🤞🏻

[andreas-river]

Oh hey. I saw on one of your stories that none of your tags are working and not showing up and I'm having the same problem. I don't know if you found a resolution or not? I reached out to Tumblr support and sent screen shots of the issue(s) I'm having. Did you happen to find a resolution? I can reach out to you if they offer some sort of work through. Your writing is really nice by the way <3

I actually have no idea, but Tumblr is really having a lot of problems. This message, for example, only appeared in my inbox TODAY.

That's why for the moment, my main platform is Ao3.

And thank you so much!

[andreas-river]

Nah whoever said that feedback is just pure lying praying for your downfall honestly I see your username in ao3 or tumblr and I know it's going to be a good read or reread because I do occasionally read everything you post the day theyre posted :33 teeheee

Oh my god thank you so much,! I'm glad you still enjoy my writing! <3