this isnt a bpd culture is thing but im curious. does anyone else w bpd have an fp that has npd? because my fp is a pwNPD and i am his equal person. and i want to find SOMETHING out there that will help me make sure that neither of us end up turning the relationship into an extremely unhealthy one bc i love him more than life itself and there is almost a spiritual connection between us that we both recognize and i am just curious if theres anyone at all that can relate.
does your FP have narcissistic personality disorder?
yes!
no.
unsure / they're questioning.
i do not have an FP.
i do not have BPD / other / see results.
feel free to reply if you have advice for this anon or if you can relate.
I have BPD. My FP is my husband, who has NPD. Our relationship has been difficult, ridiculously so sometimes, but it has been well worth it.
My advice? Communicate constantly, but do so with each other's feelings in mind. If something they're doing isn't working for you, let them know before it gets bad and without blaming them for it. Frame it as something that Just Isn't Working and would be better for both of you if an adjustment is made. You need to make it clear that it's good for you both in the long run. And, again, I must emphasize: please, do this before the feelings get bad or a spiral occurs. Be proactive, but not pushy. It's a difficult balance and you will need to accept communication of the same sort back, but it will help you build a solid relationship (of any type) going forward.
The key is that neither of you can take requests personally. Don't think of the other asking you to adjust something as criticism, not liking you, or being upset--think of it as asking a favor, or working together towards a better future, together, whatever that looks like.
It is also essential to be able to say "hey, my PD is acting up and I really need some affection/attention/whatever right now, are you available to give it?" Being open and honest about your symptoms--and them doing the same--really does do wonders. However, you both may also need to learn not to get upset when the answer is "no"--and I know that's hard. I still don't handle it terribly well. That leads into my next bit of advice, which is making sure you have other people that you care about that you can reach out to when the other is busy or cannot help you. Full reliance on one person will never work, I'm afraid--and trust me, I've tried!
Navigating relationships with one personality disorder in the mix is hard. Two is harder, but by no means impossible. You just have to approach it calmly, maturely, and with the knowledge that your symptoms can scream anything they'd like about you and your FP, but you won't let them get the better of you. You have to work on your confidence, and I know you can do it.
Feel free to reach out to me if you have any questions. :] I hope that that was at all helpful.




















