Rambling Place

will probably talk about anything I want here whether it be fandoms or personal experience ll Name: Cypress ll Pronouns: wisp/haunt/he/they

[nahmanidontwantto]

Introduction! (Kinda)

Hello! I'm Cypress, I will most likely be using this account just to ramble about my experiences and fandoms I'm in. My preferred pronouns are wisp/wisp/wisps/wisps/wispself and haunt/haunt/haunts/haunts/hauntself.

Fandoms I'm in (will slowly add them in as I remember):

Project Sekai

Genshin impact

Milgram

Bungou stray dogs

The owl house

Bandori (kinda)

Violet Evergarden (kinda)

There's more but I tend to forget my interests. I also have no specific DNI, feel free to ask me any questions about me!

[nahmanidontwantto]

I never took "you get used to it" in a bad way. I always thought about it in the "yeah you will always hurt, but it is your new normal" So yeah, you get used to it. You get used to the fact that it hurts. You find a new normal. And thats okay. Its okay to get used to it hurting. The hurting doesn't necessarily change, you do. And I like it like that.

[thecherubprince]

NOBODY is excusing or supporting abuse when they talk about how narc abuse isnt real. you are making this up in your head.

90% of the time these people ABSOLUTELY preface first that your abuse wasnt okay and when they start talking about how you shouldnt blame a trauma based disorder for the abuse your abuser did you start freaking out. do you realize how pathetic it is to completely ignore when these people say it isnt okay to demonize a disorder people obviously dont choose to have.

you're blaming the narcissism. you're blaming the abuse on the narcissism. you aren't blaming the person for the abuse, you're blaming the disorder they have for their actions, not blaming the person themself.

[ouppygirlcity]

“Florida banning all 14 year olds from social media rare Florida W???” I think it should be obvious this is an effort to control young people’s access to information that runs contrary to a conservative agenda, as well as online resources and networks that could be vital to abused children.

[ouppygirlcity]

Yeah that 14 year old has a bad take but kids are allowed to be stupid. I think it’s more important in an era of rapidly authoritarian control by fascist state governments over the lives of children, they have an alternate avenue of information and support.

[universallygiantwagonhumanoid-d]

There'll be a post like, "ableism is bad" and all the comments will be "yeah! Ableists are all sociopaths and narcissists!" "Ableists all live in their moms basements and don't contribute anything to society!"

[twoheadedfawnn]

you ever feel like you were born with something rotten inside you and if people get close enough they’re gonna find out

[choysum]

[nahmanidontwantto]

If you are within the majority of a group in one place, you are absolutely capable of oppressing others, even if you are within the minority in another.

At no point does this remove the fact that you are considered a minority in another place, but to use other locations as a reason as to why you cannot oppress others in the place in which you are the majority is illogical.

[clusterrune]

npd scentered/safe blogs

[npd scentered/safe blogs]

active

@ndcultureis

@narcissisticpdcultureis

@enigma-in-reality

@loverofmirage

@npdemu

@npd--bakugou

@selfdxculture (last posted sept.)

@yourlocalnpd (last posted sept.)

@fixingantinpdableism (last posted aug.)

@narcissist-hoarding (our term hoard blog)

@npdfavs

@prideisforeveryonebutcops

@a-sip-of-milo

@narc0path

@nicepersondisorder

@edrecovery-space (we have not posted in a while but are still active)

@fantasy-store

@cpunkwitch

@your-fave-is-crippled

@vineyard-edits

@archival-arrival

@ego-est-ignis

@objectumluv

@butchcoining

@shards-0f-glasss

@narcissism-awareness (last posted may)

@mischiefmanifold

@npders (last posted aug.)

@queersrus

@apparentlysubhuman

@sapphic-horror

@your-npd-meme-plug (last posted july)

@puffl3m0n / @acetrappolaswife

@pyrocultureis

@hauntedselves

@empath-abuse-awareness

@citrine-rabbit

@narcissists-true-crime (last posted nov)

@kodiescove

@foolishnpd

archives

@npdarchive

@npddoll

inactive

@npd-headcanons (as of 2022)

@npd-aspd-house-blog (as of 2017)

@npd-feelings (as of 2017)

@npd-characteroftheday-blog (as of 2016)

@npdcutie (as of 2015)

@mentally-ill-and-nd-culture-is (as of 2022)

if any blogs would like to be added or removed please let us know! same goes for any blogs you may have/know that arent on the list and you think should be added.

does not have to be a blog specifically for npd content but at least safe for those with npd.

i would also prefer to include blogs that are screen reader and dyslexic friendly. ie no non-sans serif fonts or coloured text and/or at least includes plane text. as well as blogs that are pro-(researched) selfdx.

[aspd, bpd and hpd bloglists coming soon]

id's in alt text.

[nahmanidontwantto]

To use your diagnosis against people to explain why they do not need an accommodation makes you an unemphatic asshole. To tell others that they don't need accommodation because you do not struggle with or struggle as much as they do makes no sense. Just because you have more stamina to run a race does not mean you get to decide when other people are tired. You do not get to decide when others take a break. You do not get to decide when others need to take a drink of water. You have your own water bottle, you decide when to drink it, and cannot decide when anyone else drinks theirs. That's just it. If others tell you that they are tired, believe them, or else they will collapse.

[narcissistcookbook]

this is so so important to me and mine, and I'm asking you to Do Something so I'll respect your time and keep it brief

in the UK, if 100k sign a a government petition it will be brought to Parliament and debated. y'all know this country is suffering from some 80s-style bigotry right now, and this is one symptom: almost 200k fuckholes have come together to force the government to discuss whether it is 'appropriate' to tell children that queer people exist. this is a big symbolic victory for them. and i am burning with fury.

please, if you're from the UK, sign this counter-petition so they can at least see how much of a minority they are. simply put, the attempt to put these bastards in their place isn't gathering enough steam. there are barely 2000 more signatures now than there were this morning (27th January 2023), and that isn't enough. i refuse to let these people feel even a moment of victory or satisfaction. please help.

[adhd-fandom-and-gay]

It's currently at 86,245. Close, but still super far away. Please reblog and share the link to spread the word!

[nahmanidontwantto]

So tired of it being an us vs them problem when it comes to Neurodivergence. Painting people as "neurotypical" whenever they're being ableist is not a neurotypical thing. This is a purely ableism thing. It is lack of understanding of traits of people differing from you. And I'm sorry, but if you do this, you're also being ableist. Saying something mean about neurotypicals (aka, something that does not go under the current Neurodivergency you're talking about) negatively affects those who have that trait whether or not they are neurotypical. The Internet has created a strawman of neurotypicality when what it really is is purely just ableism. Stop making this strawman of neurotypicality and actually talk about ableism. Anything you dunk on as a way to "own the neurotypicals" can and does negatively affect Neurodivergent people.

[nahmanidontwantto]

So tired of it being an us vs them problem when it comes to Neurodivergence. Painting people as "neurotypical" whenever they're being ableist is not a neurotypical thing. This is a purely ableism thing. It is lack of understanding of traits of people differing from you. And I'm sorry, but if you do this, you're also being ableist. Saying something mean about neurotypicals (aka, something that does not go under the current Neurodivergency you're talking about) negatively affects those who have that trait whether or not they are neurotypical. The Internet has created a strawman of neurotypicality when what it really is is purely just ableism. Stop making this strawman of neurotypicality and actually talk about ableism. Anything you dunk on as a way to "own the neurotypicals" can and does negatively affect Neurodivergent people.

[autistic-af]

In conjunction with my recent reply to an anon about loss of speech episodes:

If you experience loss of speech, you are not non-verbal

If you speak most of the time but lose speech when overwhelmed, you are not non-verbal or semi-verbal

Non-verbal people actually prefer non-speaking, but many use both

Don't tag you loss of speech posts as "non-verbal" or "non-speaking". It's not correct and clogs up the feed for those actually seeking information about non-speaking Autistics

The non-speaking community has been complaining about this for ages. Incorrect tagging blocks people from getting valuable information. This is a community-wide effort

Support and follow high support needs autistics!

[autistic-af]

I am not a non-speaking autistic. I am not gatekeeping. I am literally putting forward the wishes of the non-speaking community.

Imagine going into the autism tag and only seeing stuff about neurotypicals and nothing to help you. Or you're seeking help as an autistic and only get replies from allistics saying "I'm not autistic but here's what I do!"

You'd be furious and annoyed.

The non-speaking community experiences the same thing. They are inundated with loss of speech Autistics who can not understand or are metaphorically talking over them.

So, yes. You lose speech. You are not non-verbal or non-speaking if you speak most of the time.

Listen to high support needs autistics.

I'll tag @birdofmay who was the first to bring this issue to my attention and knows how much people argue and refuse to listen. Thank you.

[sweetpeauserboxes]

[nahmanidontwantto]

Plays the hand that feeds by the crane wives in the background

[loveisabuse-deactivated20230724]

does anyone know if it's possible for a personality disorder to develop into another one?

ive been wondering this for a bit because over a year ago i became completely numb to everything and things that would usually cause my avpd symptoms haven't really as much anymore because of the numbness.

the anxious feelings and the worthless feelings i would get have turned into a numb feeling. it's like i know im supposed to be feeling anxious by this so i still tend to have the same reactions even though i feel numb. i no longer have the desire like i used to before for friends.

i longed for them so bad but now i just don't really care about having them anymore. it's hard to explain because i have that feeling like i should be wanting them and that i still do want them even though i feel nothing and no drive to have them.

i usually just prefer to be alone most of the time and it's weird because like?? that's not me?? usually i would be dying to be with someone and not be alone and craving to be with someone so bad even if i was always alone

i have no motivation to do anything because everything feels exactly the same and nothing gives me any sort of good feeling like it used to before.

my trauma response is literally having a trauma response. i know this has to be a trauma response too because ive been having nightmares almost every night ever since it started and my nightmares are all trauma/ptsd related.

and before , i would be so tired that i couldn't function some days and i would have to sleep for so long. but now , im not tired like i used to be , even though i do get that feeling sometimes that im carrying a heavy weight and things feel hard to do.

i feel really scared that this is just going to be my life now , and the feelings that i had before are gone forever and im going to be this way for the rest of my life.

someone posted in an avpd subreddit "is anyone scared of turning schizoid?" AND I FEEL ANNOYED BECAUSE I WAS SO SCARED OF BECOMING NUMB BEFORE TOO. becoming numb was my biggest fear and now it's happened and it hasn't gotten better

everyone always says being numb is the worst kind of response and everyone is always so scared of it and im just really upset and annoyed that ive been having to live it.

i feel like .... it doesn't feel right to say i have schizoid because i thought personality disorders are something that you're supposed to have experienced your entire life and this is a response that ive only had for a little over a year now. actually maybe a year and a half now that i think about it. and ive had avpd symptoms for my entire life

also , i have no idea if things will go back to how they were before because if they suddenly do i would probably not align with schizoid anymore .

i know it's not depression either because.... it just doesn't feel like depression

it also feels like im constantly in a severe state of dissociation

[nahmanidontwantto]

Personally, this is how I feel as a schizoid. And no, you don't have to have it your entire life, you just have it before you're an adult (or symptoms since personality disorders often get diagnosed in adulthood). I know a few other people as well that feel that they were once avoidant before "turning" schizoid. When it's trauma related it tends to be because of neglect or because people showed them their love was "not enough". If an avoidant was treated like this because of their personality disorder I wouldn't be surprised if they started having schizoid behaviors to cope with it.

[nahmanidontwantto]

literally just sending you this ask to say i love your pronouns! i've never seen them before and they're very cool <3

Awwww thank you so much!!! Very sweet <3

[cistematicchaos]

Friendly reminder that “progressive” white people using “woke” as an insult is, quite literally, racist and y’all really need to stop doing it. I don’t care if you’re mocking conservatives or whatever, stop it. 

[nahmanidontwantto]

How is it racist? (Please don’t take this the wrong way, I want to learn if you’re comfortable sharing!)

[cistematicchaos]

It’s racist because “woke” is a term that was created by Black people for Black people and has no fucking business in other people’s mouths. It’s bastardized AAE (African American English) and the least that white people can do now they’ve stolen and twisted it is to leave it the hell alone. There’s no reason for them to even be using woke. They don’t even know what it means, for the most part, much less have a historical connection to it. 

White people are constantly stealing AAE, misusing it with the claim that it’s “trendy” or “slang” and then eventually getting to the point where they’re just mocking AAE all-together. That’s exactly what happened with the term woke and it’s not the progressive take white people think it is to mock language they twisted and appropriated in the first place. It’s just disrespectful.

I have no problem sharing in the least, I hope that answers your question.