angie

[eggphcbe]

💣

* talk about your muse! | Accepting!

send 💣 for a stress headcanon

((oh boy let me tell you right now,, *slaps the top of felix* this rat boy can hold so much fucking stress in him you have no idea–

he is absolutely incredibly stressed at pretty much all times. he’s the golden child. he’s his parents’ favourite, he’s a huxley, he’s the heir of applesoft, he has to be perfect at all times. he can never be allowed to waver. never allowed to make mistakes, never allowed to disappoint father, or be anything less than the very best. felix has to look his best, do his best, be his best at all times. whatever the cost. …and usually as it turns out, that cost is the sake of his own mental health

he has such a huge weight on his shoulders. he has so many expectations on him, and high standards to meet placed by his father, reaching higher and higher into impossible levels as the years go on. but he takes it all in stride. or so it seems. he’s not allowed to complain. he’s not allowed to say he can’t handle it even when he really can’t, and he’s not allowed to show weakness, or flaws, or imperfections, or the fact that he’s breaking, breaking, breaking– because that would be defying father and disappointing him. he cannot disappoint him.

not to mention, all those things about business that’s embedded in him thanks to his dad are stressful. he’s not even allowed to be a kid, not allowed to nap or play as often as a normal kid should, being forced to learn business. and of course he’s convinced that it’s what he wants. but it’s not. but he doesn’t know that, too reliant on his father for what he’s supposed to want and what he’s supposed to be. in fact he basically has no identity of his own other than the perfect son of mr. huxley who is going to inherit applesoft one day??? so yeah, he basically is stressed 24/7 lol))

[eggphcbe]

((oh shit oh fuck what if,,,,,,, felix keeps making ted feel bad about himself– keeps making him upset and makes him cry, because felix himself isn’t allowed to let himself feel things,, 

so he makes ted do all the feeling for him because they have the same face and it’s almost almost almost as if it’s like seeing himself feeling upset– while allowing felix to keep his composure + let out anger (unhealthily) + no risk of getting in trouble for idk something like ‘being so childish and showing vulnerability’))

[eggphcbe]

((ngl it makes me kinda sad most people look at this bratty snobbish kid and think he’s just so unredeemable. sure i have fun with him being the butt of the joke sometimes but i feel like most people pick on him specifically because he’s mean to ted. and maybe i’m just too empathetic or i relate too much to the way i write him but i kinda think of him as,, more than just evil? i think of him as, like. a person? a complicated person because no one’s truly black and white in the real world? 

while it may be the case in the canon game that he could be a jerk to his core since there’s never any evidence of him being remorseful for the things he does, i definitely do write felix as miserable with the way things are, and that he regrets things even though he doesn’t recognize it as such because, y’know, alexithymia. he hasn’t,, figured out that it’s better to be kind.

like. he’s a child exhibiting learned behaviour. he’s a five year old with the capability to grow and change as a person. in no way am i glorifying abuse, in fact i want him to realize it’s wrong. when are the compassionate muses gonna teach this kid that it’s wrong? when are they gonna get him to unlearn what he knows and teach him how to love instead? because. clearly, he’s never gonna learn from his dad. 

and he’ll remain stagnant and trapped unless someone pulls him out of it. sure, there’s a chance he’ll figure it out on his own. but… the reality is that it’s more than likely he won’t, and that’s real life and that’s just,,,,, sad. considering he genuinely is regretful and guilty about the way he is sometimes

and i get that some muses clearly wouldn’t know this, and i can’t change the fact they don’t know unless they bother getting to know felix (which they don’t, and felix is not an open person in the first place so it is hard to get to know him truly). but;;;; i just wonder why no one wants to help him when he’s just as much in an abusive home as ted. he’s in a very different pain than ted, very less obvious and hidden under “being the favourite child who’s “””more loved””” plus all his grandiosity” but that doesn’t mean the pain isn’t there))

[redistooviolent]

So there’s something I’d like to talk about. Felix’s reaction to the Applesoft pin.

He just goes from cold, not willing at all to talk to Kid, to willing to do anything. And Kid’s well, a kid! Imagine how he would react if an adult happened to have a pin?

Nothing good. Im just saying, he wouldn’t have to be bribed with candy or puppies.

My friend, @ofakatornado had a good idea for this.

And this has some dark implications. And that’s all I’m gonna say about that.

My other friend, @impossiblycyberenthusiast brought this to my attention, and provided the screenshots.

[impossiblycyberenthusiast]

The Applesoft Pin Theory

My friend @redistooviolent made a post a while ago about this theory. I’m actually the person who came up with it originally and I asked them to make the post because I wasn’t sure of how to word it correctly. (btw thank you very much rain!!)

I have much more information to give than just what I said on Amino. I’ve been thinking about it a lot recently, along with lines about the Huxleys in general.

First off– The way Felix behaves when you show him the pin is very disturbing. One moment he does not consider the protagonist worth a second of his time, the next he’s obedient and apologetic. @ofakatornado made an excellent point on discord about this being a form of psychological fawning; which is, essentially, people-pleasing as a trauma response. The Prestigious Pin is a trigger for Felix. He may not recognize it as such due to his age, but that’s what it is. It symbolizes that a person is to be trusted, sure, but based on his reactions, it’s clear that either A) Someone has abused that trust. or B) The way he was conditioned to trust a holder of said pin was traumatic for him. 

When I first got the idea for this, the whole pin conditioning strongly spoke to me as grooming. Child grooming is when a predator establishes a connection and familiarity with a child with the intent of abusing that child. The Applesoft business seems shady already; there’s drugs involved and their children are being turned against each other and there’s a clear scapegoat/golden child dynamic. Someone could either be grooming Felix with the pin OR using his conditioning to satiate their own sick desires. But I won’t get too far into that, seeing as the psychological affects of the latter option are either unshown due to not being situations that occur in game or are effects that are there, but are also common in other types of child abuse.

Which brings me into a side point– Felix and Ted are both being abused. There is no question about that. Mr. Huxley is an abuser. So many people think that only the scapegoat is being abused in these types of situations and that’s frankly untrue. The golden child is abused as well. Scapegoats are blamed for everything, but golden children are expected to be everything. They’re expected to be the best. They’re expected to be perfect. We can see some of this mentality in Felix! He thinks so highly of himself. 

Back to my main point. Felix gives the player a pin, which obviously means he trusts them. Does he really? For him, “trust” means “family friend”. And who knows what kind of connotations “family friend” has for Felix? After all, a person like Mr. Huxley is bound to have some sort of awful business partner. Speaking of Mr. Huxley, it’s very likely that he was the one to condition Felix into obeying said pin. A good heir, after all, would be friendly and somewhat obedient towards potential business partners. I can’t tell you what Mr. Huxley did to make Felix like that, but I do know for sure that it’s something that traumatized him. 

Fawning, in particular, is a trauma response activated sort of in a fight, flight, or freeze situation. It’s a fourth option. It appears normally when someone has endured abuse. It comes from a fear of retraumatization. It’s much more common in someone who has complex trauma or C-PTSD. Child abuse often causes C-PTSD. 

I’m not sure whether this is even classified as a theory. It really is just me pointing stuff out that’s in the game for us to see. Anyhow, if anyone has additions or comments, I’d love to hear them. 

Screenshots and Lor’s point below—

[eggphcbe]

Emotions had always been weird for Felix. That was the case with alexithymia anyway; he would just never understand it like other people did. Perhaps he did at some point but now he just didn’t ‘get them’. It wasn’t like he needed to anyway, with the line of work he’d been primed for at such a young age. All he needed to know was the signs, indications of emotions and use them to exploit; never actually needing to understand them or feel them in himself.

A ridiculous thought for most, he knew, but he never really recalled feeling too strongly about anything. It never felt like he felt them as intensely as his brother did, or anyone else, really. He chalked it up to him just not being the type to feel things beyond whatever was vaguely 'good’ or 'bad’.

So that was partially why he found himself saying offhandedly, “Teddy, I think I’m coming down with something.”

Ted looked concerned, moving closer, “You are?”

“Or I’m allergic to something. It’s the most peculiar thing.” Felix said, brow furrowed.

“What makes you think that?” Ted asked.

“Well,” He began, calmly describing it all like he would to a doctor, “I seem to get these strange palpitations, and a sort of uneasy feeling in my stomach. My face sometimes feels unpleasantly hot, and oddly I don’t quite know if it’s all a good or bad thing. It’s not obviously one or the other. I’m willing to bet it must be bad.” Feelings were weird. Some part of him felt like he wanted to feel it again, but why would he? None of those things were useful.

Ted frowned, “When did this start?”

“This morning, when I was talking to Cindy.” He recalled back to earlier that day, “She must have been wearing too much perfume. How excited she seemed about her new outfit must have distracted me.”

Ted stood for a moment, slowly smiling as he realized Felix was blushing at the mere mention of her. And suddenly all those 'symptoms’ made sense. “Felix, I think you have a crush on her!”

Felix gave his brother a look, “…That’s ridiculous. No. I must be sick. Or dying.”

“That’s what being in love feels like!” Ted grinned.

“Oh,” Felix frowned, “I hate it.”

Ted smiled, “If you’re so sure, what do you think you feel about her?”

Felix rolled his eyes. Good grief– Teddy knows he can’t describe feelings in words. “I don’t know. She’s interesting to talk to. I appreciate her forwardness.”

“And?”

“…And?” He raised a brow.

“Do you think she’s pretty?” Ted asked.

“She’s conventionally attractive, yes. What does that have to do with anything?”

“You’re right, you’re right. Well– Do you care about her?” And that made Felix think for a moment.

Most people, it didn’t really matter if there was anything that happened to them. Strangers weren’t any concern of his. And if there was nothing to be done, there was no use mulling over it. Of course his twin didn’t like being upset, and because Teddy was family Felix learned he should avoid making him upset.

But what about Cindy? Would he not care about seeing her upset? She was a friend, but it wasn’t like he wanted to see her hurt even if he didn’t quite feel things about her, from what he could tell. It was something he knew to be true for other friends.

But that strange feeling in his chest, tightening at something happening to her specifically, indicated 'something bad’ at that thought.

So perhaps she mattered a little more than others.

“…I suppose I do care.” His face was hot again. Weird. He didn’t think much of it.

[canonkindergartentrivia]

Felix lets spiders live.

Not out of concern or empathy for the life of another living being, but as a warning

[eggphcbe]

💭?

For every 💭 I receive, I will post a head canon about my muse! | Accepting!

((it’s super hard for felix to imagine what he’d want to do if being heir to applesoft wasn’t predetermined for him. he doesn’t really have skills or talents that aren’t related to business, that he knows of, or very much hobbies and things that he enjoys and does for fun. other than kinda being sadistic to his peers and that’s in-line with his cutthroat business attitude anyway

but what would he be without the company? what desires are actually his own and not his father’s? he doesn’t know. it’s kinda sad lmao, but he doesn’t really think so. mostly because he just doesn’t know better))

[eggphcbe]

📖 it's felix who keeps looping days instead of kid. (bonus: Ted can tell/notice some dejavu but ya know. is too insecure to say anything)

Send 📖+ an AU scenario to get a glance at what my muse would be like in that universe | Accepting!

He didn’t think much of it at first. He thought it was a bad case of deja vu, until it happened several times over– The same things happening at the same times, the same people saying the same things, over, and over, to the point he knew for certain that none of this could be a coincidence. Understandably, he was confused. Understandably, he was scared. And he panicked for a while. 

Until he didn’t. The day kept repeating. The same day, over and over again. And everyone became predictable. Gradually Felix understood how this worked. At the end of the day, he would wake up and start all over, everyone else just as they were in the past timeline, while Felix remembered. And he could do as he pleased.

It was a tool. He knew what would happen before anyone else did. Teddy might have looked at him weird a few times, but Felix paid no mind to the likes of him. It wasn’t as if he was important. He wouldn’t remember next time around anyway. He could use this to his benefit if he played his cards right. And that was exactly what he would do.

Until he couldn’t. It was never going to end, would it? What was the point of this if this was the only day he would live? What things could be possibly take advantage of or gain when there was nothing to use this knowledge on once everything reset back to the beginning of the day?

It was driving him crazy. He didn’t want this anymore. He wasn’t someone who liked change, but now he desperately wished for variety for once. He wished the day would end. How many times had he spoken to everyone? How many times had he backstabbed everyone, how many times had he gained everyone’s favour? Too many to count. Too many.

He didn’t want to go to school anymore. He didn’t want to do anything anymore. His life was pressure, pressure, constant pressure. Pressure from father, for school, for the company, and now the pressure of this power he didn’t ask to have. He had time at his fingertips but it didn’t even matter. And he couldn’t stop the loops from happening. And he wasn’t suited for this. 

It wouldn’t matter if he just completely broke and did everything he knew he wasn’t allowed to do one day, would it? No one would remember once he reset anyway.

[cainsnocreaturefeature]

PENNY: Hey… Felix? Did you fall asleep?

FELIX: Mm.

PENNY: Hey… Felix. Felix, don’t tell me you’re actually falling asleep in the grass? You said you hated sleeping on the ground.

FELIX: Not asleep, little Lop. Resting my eyes.

PENNY: Uh huuuh. Sure you are.

FELIX: Whether you believe me or not, my eyes are closed.

PENNY: … It’s nice to be out here without Mommy fussing. She worries too much. It’s a really good night.

FELIX: …

PENNY: … Hey, Felix?

FELIX: Mm?

PENNY: Mommy gave you upgrades recently, right? Just like me?

FELIX: … Yes?

PENNY: And you haven’t used any of them yet… right?

FELIX: I don’t like where this is going.

[applesoft-showtime]

ROCKSTAR!TED: Well, hey there little guys! Aren’t you two cute? I could just squish your little goopy cheeks!

ROCKSTAR!TED: You two look like you could use some company- can I join you?

[ Towards the experiment twins - @kindergala-babye ]

[applesoft-showtime]

ROCKSTAR!TED: ...

ROCKSTAR!TED: You really aren’t gonna give up, are you? ... fine... I guess...

ROCKSTAR!TED: We’re gonna have to be friends! Now you’re stuck with me, kiddo!

ROCKSTAR!TED: I’d really like to hang with you for a while! Is that okay?

[ @displacedbias | X ]

[iteratoryaoi-deactivated2025032]

BillyFelixBillyFelixBillyFelix

Hi felix hi Billy

Help I

[pawzofchaos]

practice kindergarten arts :P I missed these silly kids

[angellovesai]

[nuggetsofriendship-deactivated2]

A bad comic as explaination for why I ship these two. Its just. They go to some nugget factory and Nugget is having The Time Of His Life n Felix thinks it's cute,, ALSO Nugget stims and you cannot change my mind

[eggphcbe]

🎵

Send “🎵“ and I’ll reply with a song that’s related to my muse and I’ll explain why | Accepting!

((breaks knuckles honestly just listening to this song is enough explanation for why it relates to felix so much. the fact that the entirety of it is all about a cold, detached businessman with hints of lowkey hiding– trying to convince himself this is what he wants– is pretty self explanatory. but i’ll explain some of the key lyrics just because i can

“But loyal isn’t business, passion is imprudent. You’re not allowed to make demands,” the fact that it’s totally possible to backstab others in the business world just to get ahead is something felix has absolutely no qualms about. it’s pretty obvious, considering he’d kill his own brother just to be the sole heir of applesoft. ‘passion is imprudent’ meaning it’s something impulsive and careless, because felix for the most part relies more on careful planning and considering every loose end to avoid messier outcomes. he doesn’t rely on passion, or emotion and feeling to do the things he does. and being the son of his dad, being under mr. huxley, he isn’t allowed to really do anything to go against him. not that he wants to at this point but  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

“And you’re much too young to know better” he’s, like, 5,,,,,, and his dad probably uses that as an excuse to listen to him because ofc he’s older and wiser and he’s their father, so felix has to listen to him. and he does.

“Never say what you really feel. Why make a choice when it’s safer just to make a deal?” keep all his emotions suppressed. all of his desires, what makes him happy, the things he’d rather do instead of this– it’s foolish to go with his own choices. father knows better. felix was made for business, to be the heir of his dad’s company so that is what he must do. he can’t let frivolous choices sway him, the option of going against his father, because making deals are all he knows and what he does best. right?

“Stay away from what causes a stir or offends. Keep your heart silent, don’t dispute” he would never argue against his father. even if he disagrees, which he probably rarely does at this point, he would stay silent about it and never dispute his father’s logic

“And if it turns violent, make sure you know who to shoot” felix isn’t afraid to betray anyone he needs to betray. hurt anyone he needs to hurt, before they can have a chance to hurt or betray him first. if things go horribly wrong, felix is the type of person to pin the blame on someone else. usually his brother is the scapegoat. though, in alt cain’t not able he Definitely didn’t have a plan for theodore lmao. but ‘make sure you know who to shoot’ is pretty reminiscent of knowing what to do, who to handicap, in a way, to ensure that felix is the one who has power and that he can stay untouchable

“And eventually every relationship ends […] Ignore all your feelings and murder your friends” felix flat out doesn’t trust anyone except pretty much his dad. even then, he knows their relationship will end in some way. he doesn’t believe in having friends– who would genuinely want to be friends with the heir of applesoft? they just want his money, his power over others, the benefits that come with being on good terms with him. friendship isn’t real. one day they’ll betray him. it’s a dog eat dog world, is it not? so he must not allow himself to succumb to such tempting lies. felix needs to protect himself. he needs to ignore everything he feels, and betray his ‘friends,’ and his brother especially since he’s one of the heirs and it’s entirely possible he could do something to get the company to himself so felix must get rid of him first, before any of them can betray him and hurt him. he can’t get attached. he needs to remember once the other person gets everything they need from the interconnection it will be over, and they’ll be gone. he won’t let himself be used. dispose of them before they ever try to discard him first; it’ll hurt less that way

“And I don’t get your confusion, don’t get your persistence especially when there’s no one who is supporting you” i think,,,,, this is a very felix @ ted line. i do headcanon that a main aspect of ted is his constant perseverance to win felix and their dad’s approval, even though it hasn’t worked so far. the thing is ted still tries anyway. that is perseverance. and felix does not understand it one bit. if it were felix, he would have given up with something so completely pointless, when literally no one supports his brother in his fruitless endeavors– but ted tries anyway. felix doesn’t understand why he’s so persistent, how he can be so adamant on trying to make something of himself– and the fact that his brother keeps going despite all that? it scares him. felix knows how strong his brother can be because of that, and how much better than felix he could be if ted realized just how many qualities he has that felix doesn’t that he could use to his advantage. how much more he would excel compared to felix if father were to see that strength in him. good thing ted hasn’t realized. good thing felix keeps putting him down in the hopes he never realizes.

“Exploit everybody who helped you. Put all of your faith in swine. Kiss some ass, it’ll pass, and you’ll be fine” felix of course is completely fine with exploiting the people around him, even if they helped him. whether he hurts a friend or enemy, if there is the opportunity to get ahead, he’ll take it. he does kind of kiss ass and suck up to adults to further himself as well, and gets especially sycophantic around his dad because he’s the favourite twin and can do no wrong, always doing the best he can for his father. and he has to keep it that way))