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Cosmic Funnies

Andulka

Kiana Khansmith
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@angelxxwings
I love how most of the HP fandom just assumes that everyone is gay
except for Ron. Ron is only for Hermione.
Accurate
The only fixed straight pairing in these fandom.
2018 Top 10 Eunhae moments
+
IF YOU NEED TO CALL 911 BUT ARE SCARED TO BECAUSE OF SOMEONE IN THE ROOM, dial and ask for a pepperoni pizza. They will ask if you know you’re calling 911. Say yes, and continue pretending you’re making an order. They’ll ask if there’s someone in the room.
You can ask how long it will take for the pizza to get to you, and they will tell you how far away a dispatcher is.
Here is an example video
Reblog to literally save a life
I’ve done this. I’m alive because of this.
My flat-mate’s date for the night was almost as drunk as her. She had passed out in her room and locked the door. He refused to leave because he wanted to have sex. He also demanded food because he was dealing with “whiskey dick”. He didn’t like the lack of food in the fridge. I called 911, did the stuff stated above, and he was getting PISSED about how long the “order” was taking. He took my phone, demanded they “hurry the fuck up”. Police arrived two minutes later, arrested him, and helped me file a police report. Pressing charges wasn’t necessary because he had warrants on him from THREE different states for the very thing he planned to do to me. Several months after this happened one of the officers informed me he was charged with two felonies because he crossed stay lines, and will be serving no less than 35 years in prison. The officer ripped into my flat-mate about her bringing home complete strangers, while drunk, knowing full well this shit could happen.
This was 14 years ago.
Do the pizza order, do it as calmly as you can. The dispatcher I spoke to said things like this:
“If he’s drunk say you want mushrooms.” I said I want extra mushrooms.
“If he’s threatening you with sexual assault say you want onions.” I said I want onions.
She went like this with different toppings and sauces for a description of him, like pineapple if he’s blonde, black olives if he’s tall, extra large if he’s tall, etc.
They’ve heard this sort of coded call before. They’re trained for it. They will understand what you’re saying. Order the pizza.
Really though. I’m in training for dispatch and this was one of the first things they taught us. Pretend you’re talking to a friend or relative, pretend you’re ordering pizza, we’ll figure it out. We’ll word questions so you can answer in an easy, casual way. Please, just make the call and we will do everything we can to help you.
Reblog to save a life
Why the fuck is this not more widely known?
Cause women need it.
If you look in the notes there’s articles and dispatchers talking about how this is not something all dispatch centres are trained for this and that texting 911 is a better option.
When Draco Malfoy himself is the biggest shipper of Drarry
Ephemeral fantasy. #lightphotography #amateurphotography #travelphotography #photographyislife #photographyart #thailandtravel #rivercruise (at Bangkok, Thailand) https://www.instagram.com/p/BrpfxtaHo0e/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=19lq92c9ej2cn
Those sparkling eyes staring into my soul. #blackcat #blackcatlove #blackcatlove#petstagram #catsofinstagram #blackaesthetics https://www.instagram.com/p/Brm7pFIHaZd/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=4y3wglyqw61m
*Thought Draco: And what everyone found in this Gryffindork? Idiot of humble origin *lift up Harry’s chin* Always shaggy *nose brushes away a lock of hair from Harry’s forehead* Potter is just… - *sleepy* Draco? -My treasure
Halp it's still a bit early for this kind of fluff for my heart to handle 😭❤
Quidditch
It is just befitting to pay for the plethora of pleasant dreams by a myriad of nightmares, is it not? #dreams #nightmares #writingprompts #darktheme #darkprompt #dreamcatcher #blackandwhitephotography #darkaesthetic https://www.instagram.com/p/Bqj7Brrn2L2/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=a8pascvvr8pl
HOW FUCKING FASCINATING, FATHER.
DO TELL ME MORE.
YOU SO FASCINATING FATHER.
I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO FIND THIS POST FOR THREE YEARS TO SHOW TO HELENA AND HERE WE ARE
DID HELENA LIKE IT
((OOC: It’s @asktheboywhohadnochoice!!))
Mo: literally me
There will never come a day where this shows up on my dash and I don’t reblog it.
I only dreamed this day would come.
I’m heavinf
"Why spiders? Why couldn't it be follow the butterflies?" ~Ron, COS #happyhalloween🎃 #potterhead #chamberofsecrets #blackandwhitephotography #darktheme #blackaesthetic https://www.instagram.com/p/BpmQHFOnkSY/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1s6t8p58smzl7
She only saw the petals, marveling at its vibrance and scent. She was bewitched by its beauty and didn’t notice the thorns pricking her fingers. However, she kept admiring it even if drops of blood were slowly escaping from her. “Your lady, your hands are bleeding.” Someone softly called to her. “Ah,” her voice was laced with nonchalance. The rose and the blood mixing in her palms. The man that called her quirked his eyebrows finding it peculiar that a lady wasn’t aware that the roses were already making her hands bleed. “Your lady, I suggest you put those roses down and we should go treat your hand.” “The eyes can only capture the beauty but understanding nothing about veiled honesty. Sometimes it is ignored because we assume it is tolerable but it is those that causes misery to the soul. And perhaps a few are truly grey.” The man was even more puzzled by the young lady. He wanted to ask what she meant. “Your lady, I couldn’t fathom..”, he trailed off, the words were caught in his throat, as if afraid to know the real meaning behind them. And so he just stared at the young lady dazing up into nothing still clutching the roses to her chest. But something in her eyes hypnotized him as if telling him a story he couldn’t put words into. Such a mystifying young lady, he thought. #roses #writingprompts https://www.instagram.com/p/Bo_rKxCngT-/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=11p359geh85sf
I am too anxious for tomorrow... My homescreen... 🤦♀️ #SS7Manila #SuperShow7 #SuperJunior #ELF #수퍼주니어 #엘프
#SS7Manila ticketing will be tomorrow. The best of luck to tigang na #TitasofKPOP 😂 para sa #SuperJunior labaaaan!!! #lumangtaoofkpop #elf #grannies #hungergames
Such beauty.❤ And then my inner potterhead screams at me....Lily and James..... and Snape..🤦♀️ ALWAYS... #deer #summeradventure #Bicol #Philippines #photography (at Deer Farm)
Sunset will always be my favorite. ❤ #trekking #beach #summer #adventure #sunset #photography (at Patitinan White Beach Resort)