ever since you started dating, suna rintarou became the star of your universe. but one night changes it all and reminds you that you're not the center of his.
word count: 3.2k, part one of six ; angst, small smut scene, mdni 18+ anyway
part of: the longfic collab by @katsupeach and the songfic collab by @goreist
thank you to: @anime-nymph and @vanille--kiss for betaing for me <3
songs: streets by doja cat ; break my heart by dua lipa
streets masterpost ; part one ; part two ; part three ; part four ; part five ; part six
You’d never expected to catch the eye of your university’s ace middle blocker.
It had been a last minute decision to even go to that house party, all thanks to the whining of your best friend. There was a guy on the volleyball team she had a huge crush on and, to use her exact words, “I can’t be seen going alone, how lame do you think that would make me look?!”
When you saw Suna Rintarou across the hazy living room of a random person’s apartment, you didn’t think much of him. He was tall, athletic, leaning against the wall with a drink in one hand and his phone in the other. Even when your friend dragged you over toward him, you didn’t acknowledge him with more than a slight head nod. He seemed content to listen to the man speaking, too immersed in scrolling through his social media to pay much attention. Your best friend was enraptured though, too lost in her rose colored glasses to give you the time of day, so you stuck by Suna’s side, awkwardly lingering by him.
Once you grew bored of listening to your friend’s crush’s story, your mind began wandering. You looked around the room; bobbed your head to the music; glanced over your shoulder at the man standing next to you. He was handsome, even in the foggy room and the shitty lighting. His cell phone illuminated his face so you could see his sharp eyes, and the angles of his features. When those same eyes rolled up and landed straight on you, you cleared your throat, pointing to the stacks of pancakes currently on his screen.
“You should eat there.” It was a good cover for your ogling, since you had just eaten there the day prior. “They have good blueberry pancakes.”
“Oh?”
For some reason, his casual question (okay, it was more of a breathy syllable, but that didn’t matter) made you want to keep talking.
“Yeah, the prices aren’t bad for the food you get. You have to deal with a bunch of Instagram celebrities though, so all the camera shutters get annoying.”
“What if I am one of those Instagram celebrities?” He challenged with an amused smile on his face.
“Then I think you’d fit right in,” you cracked back, turning to look at him. “Though I think you’re more famous for something else on campus.”
There was a grin on Suna’s face as he turned and introduced himself, pocketing his phone for the first time all night so he could talk to you. He told you all about himself—how he went to Inarizaki High School, got into university on a scholarship, and was looking to go pro soon. You told him about yourself too—about where you came from, your major, and your plans to be a corporate slave for the rest of your life. He chortled at that, running a hand over his clean shaven jaw before asking,
“So those pancakes. You want some?”
It didn’t start out as a relationship. Just a meeting for Instagram famous food here and there, some hits and some misses. Over your lunch and dinner meetings, you got to know him more: his dreams of the big leagues, his worries about not being good enough, not after the way things ended in high school. It didn’t help that he was nearly failing his biology class, and if he did, he would lose his scholarship and be fucked for the start of junior year.
“You need a tutor, Sunarin,” you told him over ramen a few weeks before sophomore year finals. “Someone who is good at biology, and who is good at dealing with you.”
His lips puckered in joking annoyance at your ribbing, setting down his chopsticks to lean back in his chair. “So are you offering yourself?”
“I already deal with you enough,” you joked, but it was breathless. A bit forced. You loved spending time with Suna. He fit you into his busy schedule as best as he could, but it was still only here and there. Practice and class came first, and you’d never put yourself in the way of his dream if you could help it. “My biology knowledge is just okay.”
“My grade only needs to be ‘just okay’,” he shot back and checked his phone one more time. “Come over to my dorm room Friday night. Practice got canceled and ya can help me then.”
That was always who Suna was—a little pushy, but well meaning, and certainly not meaning anything bad by it. It was why you went, knocking on his door with takeout sushi and a few days’ worth of biology crammed into your head. Those study dates were your favorite, because he leaned over your shoulder, allowing you to see him up close and smell his spicy cologne. You tried not to show how he made your heart flutter wildly or how your cheeks twinged with heat whenever your hands happened to brush against each other.
A few weeks of studying, a long and hard biology final, and Suna Rintarou had passed the class by the skin of his teeth.
“Dinner’s on me,” he texted you right after he got his grade. “Let’s celebrate.”
The drinks were on him too, which is why you got tipsy enough to fall all over him, your hands running up his arms, over the ends of his hair, giggling as you leaned your head on his shoulder in the taxi. He let you too, a hard-to-suppress grin on his pink cheeks as he walked you back to his dorm room.
There was never a confession, never a big lead-up where you spilled your heart. There was only you and him, pressed against his dorm room door as soon as you stepped inside, your mouths molded together like they belonged there after so long apart. His roommate had gone home after his last final, which meant you had the entire room to yourself, and Suna made sure to use it. He took his time with you, kissing you until you were breathless, pulling your hips flush against his as you ground them together.
“Sunarin,” you begged as his mouth moved down your neck, teeth grazing your skin until goosebumps formed on your arms.
“Just Rin,” he answered before kissing you again to swallow your needy whine.
It was that name you called over and over as he worked you, face lost between your legs as he made a mess of your cunt. His tongue traced your clit like he was writing his own name, marking your pussy for himself before he dipped inside. It was sloppier than you imagined, but you didn’t care, especially not when his fingers split you open and made you whimper. It didn’t take long for you to be rocking into his thrusts, grinding down against his fingers as he sucked and lapped at your swollen clit.
The first orgasm he gave you made your eyes roll back; the second was somehow even better, his cock plunging into you, hips slapping against yours from behind as he fucked you into his mattress. He wasn’t a very vocal lover other than deep grunts and heavy breaths, but he certainly made sure you were. You were glad his roommate was gone because you couldn’t stop moaning, your fingers fisted in his sheets until you were dripping down his hard cock and begging for another release.
“Greedy,” he grunted but gave it to you anyway, fingers rubbing your clit until you were squealing his name and shaking underneath his strong body.
Things changed after that, even though you never talked about it. Your study dates started and ended with kisses; dinner meetings involved holding hands and wrapping your arms around each other. You were the first to slip up, calling him your boyfriend in front of a few friends, but Suna didn’t even bat an eye.
“Yeah,” he said with one of his little grins. “I’m her boyfriend, nice to meet you.”
Boyfriend was just the start—after two years together, you knew there was more in your future. Suna graduated and was scouted into the big leagues; you were by his side, moving into an apartment together close to his team’s gym. You always joked that his diploma was really your degree, helping him so much with studying and homework in his senior year that it was almost like you were getting a second education. But it was all worth it for those moments he came home from winning games, a happy tilt to his lips as he leaned in to kiss you as soon as he walked through the door.
You thought three years might be the key. You were both flourishing in your jobs, you with more responsibility, him with the starting position, even in his rookie year. You went to his games as much as possible, cheering his name as loud as you could from the stands, consoling him after tough losses or hard-fought victories. You were on his arm at the end of the year banquet, meeting his teammates, his old high school buddies, spending the off-season together curled up on the couch, or in bed together, never a moment apart.
Three months into his second season was when things changed.
He started going into workouts earlier and leaving the gym later. His phone password changed, and suddenly he became more secretive with it. He would call you less on away games, though when he did, he was always as attentive as usual. Date nights got canceled, nagging started.
You knew the signs. Something had changed with him, and try as you might to be the perfect girlfriend, you were no match for actual cheerleaders and models.
Because that was who Suna’s arm was around in the photo you saw on Instagram, sitting at a club next to his teammate Washio, the girl practically in his lap. “Celebrating another great win! @srintarou @tatsukisachamp” the caption from the cheerleader said.
Only Rin had told you that he was going to bed early that night, tired from the five-game set he played the entirety of.
Your fingers shook over the keyboard of your phone, staring at your text thread. Your last messages had been ones of love, filled with emojis and stickers before going silent two hours ago. You didn’t want to bug him so you left him alone to get his rest, hopeful that when he came back in two days, you could spend quality time together because you hadn’t been able to lately. There had been a lot on your mind too: your company wasn’t paying you the best, and you had an opportunity to move to a different company in the Hyogo Prefecture. You meant to talk to Suna about it tonight, but he’d insisted on sleep and you figured you could mention it as soon as he got home.
But he lied.
It felt as though the ground had opened up and swallowed you up to your chest, locking your heart in a cold, icy embrace.
Suna Rintarou was a liar.
What else had he lied about? Had he been talking to the cheerleader behind your back every time he hid his phone from view? When he was gone on road stretches and unable to be reached, was it more than just practice fatigue like he said? That ring you found in his top drawer six months ago that sat hidden and untouched since… was it ever going to be used?
Your shaking fingers typed and re-typed a message until tears blurred your vision and dripped onto your phone screen.
Call me.
Seen one minute ago.
11:45. 11:57. 12:13.
Call me, Rin. Please.
12:26. 12:48.
Incoming call: My Superstar Rin <3
“What?” was the first thing out of his mouth as soon as you picked up the phone.
“Where are you?” Your voice was quiet against the thumping in the background coming from the club you knew he was at.
“I’m on the way back to the hotel, I had to help a friend.”
It made you sick to your stomach how he could lie to you so easily. You saw the pictures for yourself, saw his hands around her waist, and now this? You had to swallow back vomit as you pleaded, “Don’t lie to me, Rin. I saw the picture.”
Suna was quiet for a moment before he sighed. “I went out to a club with Washio and Komori to celebrate our win.”
“And the cheerleaders? Were you going to tell me about them?”
“They’re here, but I don’t see why it’s a big deal—”
“Because you’re lying to me, Rin!” You exploded, voice shaking with your anger. “You said you were going to sleep, you didn’t mention there were other girls there—”
“What, I can’t be around other girls without you—”
“Not when your arm is around their waists!”
He went quiet again, the bass from the club behind him drilling into your already aching skull.
“Rin…” You whispered then paused. This was your biggest fear, the one thing you didn’t want to hear. But you wanted—no, needed to hear the truth from him. “Are you cheating on me?”
“What? No!” You had never heard him sound like affronted, his normally calm voice cracking at the second word. “You’re out of your mind. Just because I hang out with my co-workers doesn’t mean I’m cheating on you.”
“Yeah? And if I asked to see your messages, would you show me? If I asked to see your communication with them, would it be innocent? You changed your password for a reason, didn’t you?”
“You’re paranoid,” Suna insisted, voice pitched up and no longer containing the slightest bit of intoxication that had been present earlier. “It doesn’t mean anything. It’s just friendly.”
“Stop lying to me,” you demanded, throat thick and hot with betrayal. How were you supposed to believe anything that came out of his mouth now? “For the last few months, you’ve been weird, Rin. I won’t let you tell me I’m paranoid when you’re the one who has been lying to me.”
“I haven’t lied to you about anything else,” Suna grunted, heaving a sigh of exasperation. “God, you’re driving me crazy. You can’t trust me now?”
“No.” The word slipped from your lips so easily, before you even thought about it. Right now, it was the truth, as painful as it was to admit. “I can’t.”
“Fuck. Are you serious?”
“I need space, Rin.” Pain, pain, pain. The words felt like glass coming out, scratching at your throat until you couldn’t breathe without a stabbing in your chest. “I just… need to think.”
“Babe, come on.” He sounded exasperated, but there was a desperate twinge to his tone you had never heard before. “It’s a misunderstanding.”
There was a shout somewhere behind him—Washio, you knew from the voice. The teammate yelled that it was time to go, that they were heading back to the hotel now.
“We can talk about it when I get back,” Suna cut in before you could give him another lashing. “I’ll see you at home. I love you.”
Then the line went dead and you were left reeling in your living room, surrounded by memories that once filled you with so much warmth. Now they were cold, dead, laughing at you for believing in Suna Rintarou and thinking that he was yours forever.
You tried to sleep, but your eyes wouldn’t stay shut. Your mind kept replaying that picture, his harsh words, his exasperated sighs. Luckily it was Sunday and you had the day off work; unluckily you still received a text from the recruiter at the new company.
The manager really wants you to come. Have you made a decision yet?
You left it on read, throwing your phone on the table as you slunk into the couch. Suna hadn’t texted you once, probably still sleeping after his long night. It wasn’t like you wanted to talk to him anyway. You weren’t sure if you could handle more lies pouring from his mouth. Time ticked by slowly, until your phone pinged again. Your heart swelled, thinking it might be Suna messaging an apology, but it was the recruiter again.
You could start as early as tomorrow, if you need to. Let me know by tonight.
The phone shook in your hands as you stared at your message thread. This opportunity was amazing for you: a pay raise, more responsibility, more growth in the future. The only problem was that you’d have to move away from the life you built with Suna over the past three years. But was it really a shared life if he didn’t want it anymore?
And was it really your life if you always catered to his whims? You didn’t know when it started, but your entire life had become revolved around him: his schedule, his tutoring, helping him get his degree, taking care of the house while he achieved his dreams, waiting for him to come home while he was out partying with other girls. You didn’t want to hear what he had to say. If you did, you know you’d fall right back into his trap, into his arms, into his muttered annoyances as he held you.
That was why you shakily answered the recruiter: I can start tomorrow.
You regretted hitting send as soon as you did, but it was too late. He responded immediately, texting you the address of your new workplace, setting up a virtual meeting to start contracts. It was a whirlwind day, one you couldn’t remember because of running on auto-pilot. Quitting your old job with no notice; packing up your things; ignoring the happy pictures of you and Suna lining the walls.
This will be good for me, you tried to tell yourself as you sorted your things into your bags, ignoring the stream of messages coming from your phone as you did. You could only see the preview, heart clamoring too pitifully to gather the courage to check the entire thing.
My Superstar Rin <3: I’m sorry, I should have said…
My Superstar Rin <3: I’m on the bus back now so I’ll…
My Superstar Rin <3: I know you’re mad but let me…
My Superstar Rin <3: I didn’t mean it when I told you…
You knew he was panicking. Knew he had fucked up, seeing as how he had never groveled so badly. You didn’t check the messages at all, leaving them unread as you finalized the things you needed. The melancholy you felt last night was blazing hot now, anger making your hands shake as you ignored the vibrating of your phone. If he needed comfort, he could go ask one of those cheerleaders, who you were sure would gladly jump at the chance. He didn’t deserve you.
Space. That’s what you needed; that’s what you wanted. You needed time away from him, time to sort out your feelings and see if you could forgive him. Being in the apartment was so suffocating that it felt like knives plunged into your body every time you caught his eye in a picture. They watched you, hovered over you, followed you as you hurried around to pack your things.
When you stepped out of your apartment, you thought you might feel relieved or like you could breathe again, but you couldn’t. You could only blink back your tears, your phone vibrating in your pocket as Suna tried to call you again and again without answer.
Is it okay that I reblog this? (I can mainly do Haikyuu hcs, so sorry if that's not what you're looking for atm)
• Suga would always wake you up with a cup of coffee/tea made just as you like to have it. Whenever you're stressed, he'll make you take jasmine or chamomile tea, and he'll massage your shoulders to get the tension away from your sore body. He doesn't expect anything from it, and when you decide to doze off in your chair, he's more than happy to carry you to bed, only to cover you up with a blanket and put you to sleep.
• Daichi has always been a dog person, especially after he joined the Police Academy for his training. He has always preferred dogs.....until he went to a cat cafe with you on a date. He sees you playing with a tabby cat, all fluffy and cosy, and the next day he comes home with a cute little kitten adopted for you guys. Despite the obvious excitement, you're a little scared cuz you both have a pet already. But when you walk in on your cat Millie and your Rottweiler dog Arby (he's an old dog but he's great) cuddling in the sun one fine day, you think maybe it's nice to have more company around your two-bedroom apartment.
• Terushima is 100% a K-Pop stan. You're telling me, the guy with the bleached hair and pierced ear isn't into K-Pop? Or doesn't take inspiration from their fashion for his fits? Granted, his obsession probably started with him finding most idols attractive or stylish....but now he has almost all of their choreographies learnt. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise, cuz trust me, he probably dances to Twice's songs whenever he can. (It's adorable, you tell him that whenever you catch him dancing in the bedroom all on his own while Twice's TT is blasting on TV)
“You’d be surprised”, said Xaldien, who just lost four followers and received a lovely “men can’t be raped” anon shortly after reblogging this the first time.
Out of 19000+ followers I have, only one of you actually reblogged about this issue, yet a lot of you have reblogged and liked a picture by playboy about catcalling and that how men should never do it.
Additionally, I have received abuse in my ask box (which I will be answering when I can) and threats. In particular death threats and rape threats.
I can see the real problem here already. Male domestic violence and rape is just invisible in our society because we don’t want to talk about this because it just damages the status quo of this fucking website.
I won’t immediately assume anyone here is a bad person for not reblogging because sometimes things like this can take a lot out of you, especially if it’s something you’ve gone through. But you guys aren’t alone and I hope this lets you know that you are seen
That being said. If I get trash in my inbox for this I will not pull my punches.
Reblog if it’s okay for your followers to leave you an ask telling you what the one thing is they remember you for as a writer. Is it a scene or a detail or a specific line? Is it something like style or characterization? Is it that one weird kink they never thought they’d be into, but oh my god wow self-discovery time?
nerd atsumu that is so whipped for his pretty gf....always helping her understand her syllabus...coding in java and python so when she runs the code it makes a huge <3 on the output console....always cracking corny chemistry jokes cuz she always laughs at them...treats her to ice cream whenever she aces an exam....always holding your hand whenever you're scared to wait for an interview....kissing your forehead and wishing you good luck on the first day of a new semester.....just nerdy boyfie atsumu :(((
the intercom blares out loud the next stop of the station, slowly coming to a stop as it finally opens its gates and streams of people bustle in and out of the carriage.
sakusa is surrounded by people everywhere. he’s thankful for the mask that shields him from everyone - careful to not compromise his health during volleyball season. you’re resting on his shoulder, sleeping throughout the entire train ride - too tired to sit up by yourself.
he doesn’t mind it though. when it comes to you, he never minds. your touch is grounding, always a bittersweet reminder that he exists and he has you. his hand carry multiple plastic bags, filled with different foods and clothes.
he had promised you a day out and as much as it hurt him, he kept his promise to you. always have, always will. maybe that’s what makes him weak.
you make him weak.
the train ride ends in the next fifteen minutes when it finally makes a stop at a station near his home, and kiyoomi gently shakes you awake.
“had a nice sleep?” he asks, ruffling your hair as you take half of the stuff he’s carrying and make your way out of the platform.
your phone rings and you smile sleepily as you answer it, “hey, bo. where did you park again?”
walking outside in the orange sky, kiyoomi watches your engagement ring glow with you as you greet your fiance with a pep in your step. bokuto is eager and excited, swooping you into his strong arms as he pulls you in for a deep kiss. both of you emanate love and it makes him sick with wanting. wanting and hoping and praying for another chance to be with you.
you turn around with a soft smile, asking him, “do you want us to drop you, kiyoomi?”
you whisper it softly and he wishes his heart wasn’t so weak; he wishes he wasn’t so weak to refuse more time with you - even if it’s shared with the love of your life.
he shakes his head and refuses, citing that he has some last minute errands to run before crashing back home. he’s thankful his mask hides the frown on his face, how he ever so slowly drops his facade of ‘being okay’ as he watches you leave in the black porsche parked a few feet away.
through bleary eyes, he books a cab for back home as his buckling knees lead him to a seat nearby. sitting on the cold hard steel, he shakily wipes his eyes and it comes clean - time and time again.
he cannot even afford the luxury to cry and mourn a love lost too soon, how pathetic.
as he sits and waits alone, he wonders if the jewelry shop would accept it if he returned the promise ring he bought you for your late birthday, hoping that he could’ve asked you to be his back then, only to be bested by his much better, much brighter teammate.
not that he blames you, he never could blame you.
he just wishes…..
he wishes he had you - that’s all there is to it, really.
I just wanna be in between two men who absolutely adore and worship me. Who want nothing more but my pleasure. They’re both madly in love with me. But who I can also watch and be involved with them being with each other.
the intercom blares out loud the next stop of the station, slowly coming to a stop as it finally opens its gates and streams of people bustle in and out of the carriage.
sakusa is surrounded by people everywhere. he’s thankful for the mask that shields him from everyone - careful to not compromise his health during volleyball season. you’re resting on his shoulder, sleeping throughout the entire train ride - too tired to sit up by yourself.
he doesn’t mind it though. when it comes to you, he never minds. your touch is grounding, always a bittersweet reminder that he exists and he has you. his hand carry multiple plastic bags, filled with different foods and clothes.
he had promised you a day out and as much as it hurt him, he kept his promise to you. always have, always will. maybe that’s what makes him weak.
you make him weak.
the train ride ends in the next fifteen minutes when it finally makes a stop at a station near his home, and kiyoomi gently shakes you awake.
“had a nice sleep?” he asks, ruffling your hair as you take half of the stuff he’s carrying and make your way out of the platform.
your phone rings and you smile sleepily as you answer it, “hey, bo. where did you park again?”
walking outside in the orange sky, kiyoomi watches your engagement ring glow with you as you greet your fiance with a pep in your step. bokuto is eager and excited, swooping you into his strong arms as he pulls you in for a deep kiss. both of you emanate love and it makes him sick with wanting. wanting and hoping and praying for another chance to be with you.
you turn around with a soft smile, asking him, “do you want us to drop you, kiyoomi?”
you whisper it softly and he wishes his heart wasn’t so weak; he wishes he wasn’t so weak to refuse more time with you - even if it’s shared with the love of your life.
he shakes his head and refuses, citing that he has some last minute errands to run before crashing back home. he’s thankful his mask hides the frown on his face, how he ever so slowly drops his facade of ‘being okay’ as he watches you leave in the black porsche parked a few feet away.
through bleary eyes, he books a cab for back home as his buckling knees lead him to a seat nearby. sitting on the cold hard steel, he shakily wipes his eyes and it comes clean - time and time again.
he cannot even afford the luxury to cry and mourn a love lost too soon, how pathetic.
as he sits and waits alone, he wonders if the jewelry shop would accept it if he returned the promise ring he bought you for your late birthday, hoping that he could’ve asked you to be his back then, only to be bested by his much better, much brighter teammate.
not that he blames you, he never could blame you.
he just wishes…..
he wishes he had you - that’s all there is to it, really.
