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@annabeths-kitten
“My mission, should I choose to accept it, is to find peace with exactly who and what I am. To take pride in my thoughts, my appearance, my talents, my flaws and to stop this incessant worrying that I can’t be loved as I am.”
— Anaïs Nin
Alice was mad, mad like the Hatter. Except the Hatter doesn’t exist. Like rabbit’s ticking watch Or the white roses she painted red Even the bottle that turned her small And the cake she ate that made her tall Alice created Wonderland from her own horror story The Hatter beat her every night The ticking echoed throughout her life Her pale white skin she painted red And the bottle that seduced her craving head. Wonderland was a delusion to those diagnosed sane Alice was mad There is no Wonderland.
Sam Allen (via thatsamkid00)
#storyofmylife
Low Self-Esteem and Jealousy
You seem to be great at giving advice, so I was wondering if you could help me out. I suffer from depression and anxiety, which negatively impacts my relationship with my boyfriend. I have extremely low self esteem and get extremely jealous of other girls. Do you have any advice on how to stop being jealous and to just enjoy my relationship?
Jealousy is a natural companion of low self-esteem, which is a natural companion of anxiety and depression. All of these conditions will play a large role in any relationship. Mindfulness and meditation can help bring you some peace as you learn to better appreciate yourself.
Low self-esteem is like constant jealousy. When you think you are unworthy, you become jealous of everybody who appears worthier in comparison. When you notice yourself comparing yourself to others or to a more perfect imaginary image of yourself remember that you are hurting yourself by making that comparison. Remember that because you are often anxious and depressed that your judgement about yourself is likely to be negative. You can’t trust that judgement. You have to remember that you are no better or worse than anybody else.
When we compare ourselves to others, it is arrogant to think we are better than others and ignorant to think we are worse. Humility is right in the middle, where we understand that we are as valuable as anybody else. It can be easier to be humble from a place of low self-esteem, but it hurts more.
Working with your anxiety and depression will help you with your self-esteem and your jealousy. Working with your jealousy can help you with your self-esteem, anxiety and depression. When notice yourself feeling jealous, take a breath and remind yourself that you are no better or worse than anybody else. Remind yourself that you are making a comparison, and that making that comparison, judging, is causing you pain. Feel compassion for your pain. Remember that you don’t want to feel pain and you don’t deserve to feel pain. Try not to spread the pain by acting out of jealousy.
Learning to awaken compassion in the face of a hot emotion is difficult. Practice when you are feeling calm. Imagine people who make you jealous and see what thoughts and feelings come up. See what you are thinking about yourself. See if you are judging or comparing. Let the thoughts go and see what becomes of the jealousy.
Here are some posts I wrote about self-esteem and comparing yourself to others. I hope you find them helpful.
Self-Comparison
Self-Esteem
No-Self Esteem
Turning Depression into Humility
I hope you are able to practice compassion for yourself and that your boyfriend treats you with kindness and respect as you deserve to be treated. I hope your depression, anxiety and jealousy pass quickly whenever they arise.
I need this
Alice was mad, mad like the Hatter. Except the Hatter doesn’t exist. Like rabbit’s ticking watch Or the white roses she painted red Even the bottle that turned her small And the cake she ate that made her tall Alice created Wonderland from her own horror story The Hatter beat her every night The ticking echoed throughout her life Her pale white skin she painted red And the bottle that seduced her craving head. Wonderland was a delusion to those diagnosed sane Alice was mad There is no Wonderland.
Sam Allen (via thatsamkid00)
'Letting go of the fixed self isn't something we can just wish to happen. It’s something we predispose ourselves to with every gesture, every word, every deed, every thought. We’re either going in the direction of letting go and strengthening that ability or going in the direction of holding on...
Although I am learning to have no expectations on neither myself or others.. I can't help but to wonder if it's sad that the only thing I have learned to have no expectations on, is getting pleased at night.... or maybe I've learned to expect nothing so I don't feel disappointment or rejection. I don't know.
People experience a lot of stress from imagining that they don’t matter. If you didn’t matter, you would not stress over whether you matter or not. You matter because you suffer. Before you suffered, you didn’t even concern yourself with whether you mattered or not. You knew you mattered. When you...
"We can also give to animals. Saving insects from drowning or gently picking worms up from the road is an example of giving fearlessness, or protection. Even allowing a mouse to rummage through our waste paper basket without getting irritated can be a form of giving. Animals want to be happy just as much as we do, and they need or help even more than other humans. Most humans have some power to help themselves, but animals are so deeply enveloped in ignorance that they have no freedom whatsoever to improve their situation. "
"Eight Steps to Happiness" - Geshe Kelsang Gyatso (via purpleaggregates)
Why do I find this offensive?
my son was crying hysterically yesterday adter becoming fixated on the idea of leaving me when he gets older..... he is only 5
When I "wake up" everything feels as if it were a bad dream... Then I look down and realize it wasn't. What is left? The ache in my arms from fresh new wounds, an acceptance to my relapse rather than the feeling of failure to not do it anymore, shame towards those who care but still moving on and living the next day for I have more important things to do than focus on the past.
What I’m getting at is this:
Whatever you put first in your life that’s what you ultimately become. If you think your work is number one because that’s what supports you, you’re looking at this thing the wrong way. What supports you is the Self. Work is only one of the channels of the Self. If...
It all makes sense now. Gay marriage and marijuana are being legalized at the same time. Leviticus 20:13 says if a man lays with another man, he should be stoned. We were just misinterpreting it.
I can’t get over the gif
normal person: sings lyrics
me: sings lyrics
sings backup vocals
sings guitar riffs
air-drums entire song
headbangs
“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them-that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” -Lao Tzu
(via kaeliejayy)
Today is my birthday, it is a day like any other, why should I be compelled to feel glad on this particular day. What is there to celebrate about? the moment I was forced moist out of my mother's womb? I was happier before, when the world was a hot red warmth and there was only the sound of my mothers' heartbeat and the muffled reverberations of her comforting voice. Better than this - this cold, dreary land of grief and misery
-poison
