✨Despite it all, here we are.✨ Est. 1994. I write and draw stuff sometimes. Weird theater kid, amateur gamer, long time nerd. [she/her] Blog navigation (currently in the works)
Coruscant receives Mon with unusual quiet and heavy rain.
They'd been on their way back to Chandrila. Even with the Empire gone, there was much work still ahead of them.
And yet, no one had questioned her request to come here, or why she'd ordered them to stay behind, going off of nothing but an inkling that she was going to find something here.
She pulls her cloak tighter around her as she makes her way along half dilapidated buildings and through small alleyways. Eventually, the Senate comes into view.
Back to the beginning.
The Senate building, once opulent and bustling with life, lies deserted, the doors slightly ajar, the wind chiming through the half-open windows like a haunting cry.
The imperial flags are gone.
So are the people within.
She draws a deep, shaky breath as she steps through the door. Dust billows over the once spotless floors of the hallways.
It's my people today and yours tomorrow! A voice breaks the eerie silence. Remember this day! Remember Ghorman!
She looks around, but there's no one there.
Very idealistic, that one.
I can't help you, Senator, much as I admire your enthusiasm.
This is how liberty dies...
Chancellor Palpatine wouldn't! How DARE you...
I came to thank you, Mon.
The voices subside as quickly as they appear, mingling, blending together.
Don't worry about me. Once I get you started, I'll have my head down. This time, she hears it loud and clear, but as she glances over her shoulder, again she stares down an empty hallway.
She holds her breath as she strides towards the Senate Chamber, trying to ignore the lump in her throat.
The doors no longer respond to her touch. She lets out a sigh.
I’ve spent my life in this Chamber. I came here as a child. And as I look around me now, I realize that I have almost no memories that pre-date my arrival and few moments of affection that cleave so tightly.
She looks at the dormant room, steels herself, and turns around.
The rain has subsided a bit as she steps outside again, and only now does she notice something she'd never noticed before.
Plants have started to grow around the building, most not even commonly found on Coruscant - Millaflower, Orcanthus, spiky green grass and minuscule blue starflowers. And Candlewick - droves of it, ranking along the façade, taking over the polished metal even though there's barely anything for it to hold onto.
There isn't even much soil for any of these plants to grow - and yet, despite everything, they're there, surviving stubbornly.
How ironic.
Finally, a small speck of sunlight breaks through the clouds, and for a moment, she pulls down the hood of her cloak and takes in the warmth and the scent of the flowers.
"Chancellor."
The hazy silhouette of a man appears next to her.
She knows that silhouette. She knows that voice.
"They're beautiful, aren't they?"
"Why are you..." she whispers. "You're dead."
"And you're probably expected somewhere else", Bail counters. "But you decided to come here."
"I wanted to see what became of it", she replies. "I'm sorry, Bail. For everything."
"I'm glad you came to visit." He reaches for her arm, and she can feel the cold touch through the fabric of her cloak. "How's Leia?"
"With me." She tries to keep her voice steady. "She's... doing good work."
"You should've been there", she adds after a pause.
"Mon, listen to me." The silhouette flickers. "Everything went according to plan. I can rest easy knowing that."
The cold sensation creeps up from her elbow to her shoulder. "Now go. You have an entire galaxy waiting for you."
She nods, and the vision vanishes.
"I could really use your advice, old friend", she whispers to no one.
"Hey." She startles at the voice from behind her. "You got this far. One step at a time, alright?"
With that, he's gone. She forces herself to turn away, exhaling slowly.
No point in staying any longer, she thinks. But our old apartment is just around the corner. Might as well...
The apartment complex looks exactly as she remembers. A bit more run down, perhaps, with the once white paint peeling off the walls in gray strips and the dust covering the floors, but apart from that, it stands unchanged.
Apartment 1313.
This door, miraculously, does still respond to her touch. She opens it and peeks inside. Immediately, unease creeps up on her.
"Is there anyone here?" she whispers.
The room remains silent for a moment. Then, a weak voice responds from somewhere within the apartment.
"Mon? Is that you?"
"Who are you?" she asks, frantically looking around, only now realizing that she has nothing to defend herself with.
She involuntarily takes a step back when a familiar figure emerges in front of her. "Mon. Mon, it's me."
"Perrin?!"
"Welcome back." He pauses, averting his eyes. "Have a seat."
She takes a moment to muster him as she sits down on the couch in the living room, now threadbare, and he eventually sits down next to her.
Physically, he seems unharmed, better than before she'd left, even. Thank the Stars. But still...
This isn't the man I remember.
The man she remembered had been jovial, careless, talking about seeking joy and the comfort of a good meal.
Now, he's a little quieter, a little more somber, cheerless, the lines on his face a little deeper, and she isn't quite sure whether it's the course of the years that has taken its toll or whether his joviality had always been a façade.
"You stayed", she blurts out. "All those years, and you're still here."
"... yes." His voice quivers.
"Are you alright?"
"Don't worry about me." He crosses his arms in front of his chest. "Why are you here, Mon?"
"We're on our way back to Chandrila", she explains. "The Empire may be gone, but our work doesn't end there. Chandrila will be our temporary base, and... I wanted to see what became of Coruscant before going home."
"Home." The bitterness in the word isn't lost on her. She tacitly takes his hand in hers and links her fingers with his.
"Come. Come with me. Let's get out of here."
Perrin doesn't respond; he squeezes her hand a little tighter in acknowledgment as they leave the apartment behind and they keep walking without another word until end up back at the spaceport.
She taps her comm. "Erskin."
"Yes Ma'am."
"I'm back at the spaceport."
"Copy that. I'll ready everything."
"I hope you don't mind us having one more passenger", she continues. "Because I happened upon someone whom I have a lot to discuss with."
"Wha-"
Perrin leans towards her. "Thank you, Erskin."
"Is that who I think it is?" She can hear the barely concealed laugh. "Leia, you'll stay here in front with me. These two do have a lot to discuss."
The door of the small shuttle hisses as it opens, then closes behind them with a quiet finality.
"Well, I suppose that's that." She can feel his gaze on her as they settle into their seats. "I didn't think I'd see Chandrila again."
"Why did you stay?" she argues. "You could've gone anywhere."
"I'm not sure", he replies. "But I'm glad I did."
He pauses. "Tell me what happened, Mon."
"You first."
Perrin looks at her with an expression she can't place.
"Alright. Though you might find my story less... inspiring."
"Go on. Surprise me."
"The truth is, I have no recollection of the first few... weeks, maybe months after you left", he begins, "Well. That's only half true. I was too drunk to think clearly for most of it, but have one very... specific yet vague memory. A moment of clarity after the frenzy, perhaps... anyway, at some point I found myself in a limospeeder, feeling terrible, with a woman next to me. No idea of what happened or how I got there or whether I'd done... something stupid."
"After that, I laid low. Somehow pulled myself together, kept up appearances. There's not much more to tell." Silence settles between them for a brief instant before he continues. "You made it clear you do not trust me. I can't fault you for that, much less after what I just told you. But whatever it is you're planning to do, I'll be there to help if you'll have me."
Again, Mon finds herself considering the man next to her.
Again, she sees someone she barely recognizes.
"Say something." He turns slightly, shoulders slumping, avoiding her gaze.
"I..." A sobering realization creeps up on her as she lets her gaze wander out the ship's small window. "You know what? I don't think it particularly matters anymore."
Perrin's attention immediately snaps back to her.
"But..."
"Perrin, listen." She inhales sharply. "Things have changed since I left. Which means things between us..."
"... aren't going to be the same, either." He grimaces. "Yes, I figured as much."
She lets her head sink against his shoulder, and to her surprise, he lets her.
"Before I left, I kept you at an arm's length because I thought I could protect you that way", she says. "I can't undo that. But the Empire is gone now, no more need to put on an act, and... you offered to help, so I'm taking you up on that offer."
"As you wish." His voice is still terse, the words reticent, but she can feel some of the tension subside as the cabin of the ship falls silent again.
"Do you remember", she finally asks, "your speech at Leida's wedding?"
"The constant cloud of sadness. Yes, yes, I remember all too well, unfortunately."
"... you were right, you know."
"That surely isn't something I ever expected to hear from you, of all people."
"You're hearing it now." She attempts a smile. "I thought a lot about that evening after I left. And about that speech."
"And did you find it? The joy? The music buried beneath the noise?"
The music buried beneath the noise.
She thinks back to thirty years ago, her and Perrin standing under a garland of blue blossoms, rain soaking their starched garments.
Late nights in the Senate.
Her and Perrin falling out, then finding their way back together.
Holding Leida in her arms for the first time, a tiny, helpless bundle.
Watching that helpless bundle grow up and eventually forsaking her family, her career, her perfect, cushy life for something bigger than any of them.
To Yavin, sitting by a fire, chatting and forgetting about the war around them for a moment, getting a bit too excited for their own good.
To a hand, a cup of tea, a warm coat offered when it was needed.
To the day her efforts - their efforts - finally paid off and the Empire fell.
To a moment of quiet serenity standing amongst a bunch of flowers that obstinately refused to die.
"Maybe."
Perrin cocks his head, waiting for her to continue.
"And maybe we'll find it again, somewhere."
"Then maybe", he suggests, "We could start looking right here, right now."
"You make it sound so awfully easy."
"Well", Perrin retorts simply, mouth quirking up, "Perhaps it is."
Perhaps, she thinks. Start here, and... keep walking.
Once more, her gaze wanders outside. They must have made the majority of the trip already - Chandrila has come into view, a faint green and blue speck among a tapestry of stars, but there nonetheless.
Keep walking. We've done it before, haven't we? One step at a time. One step at a time. The way under our feet was paved by thousands of these seemingly inconsequential steps, after all.
"Looks like we're almost back", Perrin interrupts her spiraling thoughts. She manages a faint nod as she turns to him.
Will you walk this next part of the way with me?
She reaches out to cup Perrin's cheek with her hand. He tenses for a moment before releasing a trapped breath and pulling her into his arms.
She leans in until their foreheads come to rest against each other. Then Perrin closes the tiny gap between them.
The kiss is gentle, soft, for once not exchanged out of obligation or in the heat of the moment, but to say I'm here. I love you.
He's the first to pull back slightly, breaking the kiss without letting go of her entirely. She keeps her eyes closed for a moment, and when she opens them again, he's still inches from her, and she can see the tears brimming in his eyes despite the low light in the cabin.
"Don't cry." She reaches up to wipe them away. "I promise..."
Perrin shakes his head. His hands grip her shoulders, a little too forceful, still refusing to let go.
"I don't want to hear your promises, Mon." He loosens his grip. "I'm sorry. You coming back so suddenly..."
"I know." Her fingers briefly fiddle with the thin golden band with the twin gemstones, the only link to her old life for many, many years and through every high and low that those years had brought.
Perrin cups her hand with his.
"You still haven't told me what happened."
"Too much to fit it into the few minutes until we land."
Thankfully, he doesn't push the subject any further. He leans back and folds his hands in his lap. "Later, then."
The shuttle finally touches Chandrilan soil. Mon taps her comm again. "Erskin, Leia - thank you. Take the rest of the day off, why don't you."
"Understood", Erskin replies.
Perrin offers her his arm. She hesitates for a moment before taking it, only for his hand to slip away and wander along her back soon after, a tiny spark to a livewire. She doesn't know if she can allow herself to savor it just yet.
One step at a time, alright?
They find themselves in the kitchen of the estate, and for the first time in a long time, Mon finds herself fumbling for words. Finally, her eyes land on the kettle by the stove and she makes a simple offer.
"Tea?"
Perrin acknowledges it with a smirk. "Gladly."
-----------------
Well, this was supposed to go up for May 4th but clearly I didn't get it done on time. Hope you still enjoy some fresh MonPerrin content.
The walls of the small, dark cell seem to cave in on Obi-Wan.
I never planned on killing you. But I will make you share my pain.
He leans back against the cold stone.
I understand, he thinks, closing his eyes. Water drips down the wall, steady as a clock.
Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick.
He focuses and reaches into the Force.
Satine. Satine. Satine.
A small, feeble flicker.
No. Don't give me hope.
Maul is there, too, smug, victorious, and yet... unsatisfied?
Then, a sudden disturbance, a light shut off. He blinks, attempting to steady himself.
Another few silent moments pass. Then steps approach from outside the cell block.
"Master Kenobi."
A woman in Mandalorian armor appears in front of the cell.
"Who are you?" he asks hoarsely.
The woman removes her helmet. "Let's get out of here, Master Jedi."
"Bo-Katan?"
"Yes, yes. Don't feel flattered - I'm not here for you. But I also wasn't going to leave you here to rot."
"You...", he stammers, "Your sister... that's why you came, isn't it? She..."
"... she's alive", Bo replies tersely.
"What about Maul?"
"Will be dealt with. We have him under control. Now move." The cell door opens with a click. "Oh, you may need this."
She chucks his lightsaber at him, and he summons the weapon into his hand. "Thank you, Bo."
She makes a dismissive gesture. "Later. A certain duchess is waiting for us."
He tacitly follows her to the upper levels. They find Satine still in the same spot. A wave of relief washes over him.
"Satine."
"Obi!"
"Are you alright?"
"Don't worry about me", Satine replies, clumsily getting to her feet. Then she turns to her sister. "Bo-Katan. Vor entye."
Bo nods curtly. "Let's not stick around here longer than necessary."
The outside is eerily silent, the lingering silence before a storm.
Bo inhales sharply. "You two go ahead. We'll deal with Maul."
"Vod'ika." Satine sighs.
Bo shakes her head, lips pressed together so tightly they're little more than a thin line. Then she puts on her helmet. "Go. Maul will get what he deserves, I promise."
She takes off. Obi-Wan and Satine share a long look.
"Perhaps we should listen to your sister."
Satine's shoulders sag. "Let's."
They slowly, arduously, make their way to the spaceport, Satine cleaving to his left arm while the lightsaber rests in his right hand, ready to be wielded.
Miraculously, they reach their destination without a hitch.A small silver starfighter sits at the port, waiting for them.
"Well", Satine asks quietly, "Where do we go?"
"Let's get back to Coruscant for now", he replies softly, taking her hand. "We'll... take it from there."
Satine acknowledges the suggestion with a faint nod.
"Let's speak with the Senators. At the very least, they should be informed of the developments in Mandalore. And... Maybe we can..."
The sentence remains unfinished. It doesn't need to be finished. He knows exactly what she means to say, and he knows it'll likely be no use.
They make the trip without either of them speaking a word.
Coruscant knows how to receive its guests.
Obi-Wan leaves the Senators to fuss over Satine for a moment. A guest room is hastily prepared by some harried attaché while they chatter lightly among them.
When the attaché comes back, bowing deeply and muttering something about I hope we prepared everything to your liking, Lady Kryze, Satine glances past the Senators right at him and smiles.
"Thank you for your hospitality, and your time, Senators. But I'd wish to speak with Master Kenobi in private, if you don't mind."
The Senators mutter their approval, and the attaché nods, gesturing for them to follow him. Not long after, they find themselves alone in the guest room.
"Vod’ika." Satine taps her comm. "Me'vaar ti gar?"
"Jate'kara", Bo replies, immediately switching to Basic as she adds, "I'm assuming Master Obi-Wan is with you."
"Yes."
"Good. Then know that Maul did in fact get what he deserved, both of you. Ret'urcye mhi."
The line goes dead. Satine sinks onto a plush ottoman.
Jate'kara, he thinks. Good stars. I'm not too sure if I'd call it that, despite everything.
"Obi."
"Yes?!"
"Can you stay? Humor me for a bit?"
"I..." he fumbles for the right words, "I'll probably just spoil the rest of this day."
"My dear Obi-Wan." She gives him a bright smile, surprisingly bright given the circumstances. "Why would you possibly spoil anything."
"Satine, look." He lets out a sigh. "I'm not particularly good at... this kind of conversation. I'll just end up saying something stupid and..."
"Something stupid? You, the famous negotiator?" she teases. Then her expression softens.
"Just sit with me for a bit, will you?"
He hesitantly sits down next to her. Her head sinks against his shoulder, and for a long while, they simply sit in silence.
"I love you", he eventually blurts out. "There. I suppose that counts."
Satine laughs and gently pulls him closer.
"I love you too." She pauses before adding, "And that is never a stupid thing to say."
Obi-Wan lets the room fall silent again.
"I only wish", he finally says, "We'd found each other under... better circumstances."
Satine holds his gaze.
"I remember a time in which the Jedi were peacekeepers. They were capable fighters, certainly, but..."
"I know", he interrupts softly. "I know."
"Do you think", she continues, voice brittle, "We'll ever go back to that?"
The words sting more than he cares to admit.
"That... I don't know." He reaches up and runs his fingers through her hair, light enough that she can pretend not to notice, but she lets out a sigh of content and leans further into him. "I'd hope so."
“I hope so, too, dear.” Satine fully curls up against him. Obi-Wan presses his lips to her forehead.
“I promise…”
Satine gingerly shakes her head. “I think it’s best you don’t promise me anything.”
He nods and exhales slowly. “Perhaps.”
Their eyes meet briefly before she buries her head in his shoulder. It takes a while for him to realize she’s crying, quietly, the tears slowly staining his shirt, making him feel even more woefully out of his depth.
“Satine, darling.”
She doesn’t reply. He deems it best not to move, not to speak. Eventually her breathing becomes deeper, more even. The tears subside.
Obi-Wan smiles faintly.
It’s alright. Sleep now. I’ll be here when you wake up.
Coruscant receives Mon with unusual quiet and heavy rain.
They'd been on their way back to Chandrila. Even with the Empire gone, there was much work still ahead of them.
And yet, no one had questioned her request to come here, or why she'd ordered them to stay behind, going off of nothing but an inkling that she was going to find something here.
She pulls her cloak tighter around her as she makes her way along half dilapidated buildings and through small alleyways. Eventually, the Senate comes into view.
Back to the beginning.
The Senate building, once opulent and bustling with life, lies deserted, the doors slightly ajar, the wind chiming through the half-open windows like a haunting cry.
The imperial flags are gone.
So are the people within.
She draws a deep, shaky breath as she steps through the door. Dust billows over the once spotless floors of the hallways.
It's my people today and yours tomorrow! A voice breaks the eerie silence. Remember this day! Remember Ghorman!
She looks around, but there's no one there.
Very idealistic, that one.
I can't help you, Senator, much as I admire your enthusiasm.
This is how liberty dies...
Chancellor Palpatine wouldn't! How DARE you...
I came to thank you, Mon.
The voices subside as quickly as they appear, mingling, blending together.
Don't worry about me. Once I get you started, I'll have my head down. This time, she hears it loud and clear, but as she glances over her shoulder, again she stares down an empty hallway.
She holds her breath as she strides towards the Senate Chamber, trying to ignore the lump in her throat.
The doors no longer respond to her touch. She lets out a sigh.
I’ve spent my life in this Chamber. I came here as a child. And as I look around me now, I realize that I have almost no memories that pre-date my arrival and few moments of affection that cleave so tightly.
She looks at the dormant room, steels herself, and turns around.
The rain has subsided a bit as she steps outside again, and only now does she notice something she'd never noticed before.
Plants have started to grow around the building, most not even commonly found on Coruscant - Millaflower, Orcanthus, spiky green grass and minuscule blue starflowers. And Candlewick - droves of it, ranking along the façade, taking over the polished metal even though there's barely anything for it to hold onto.
There isn't even much soil for any of these plants to grow - and yet, despite everything, they're there, surviving stubbornly.
How ironic.
Finally, a small speck of sunlight breaks through the clouds, and for a moment, she pulls down the hood of her cloak and takes in the warmth and the scent of the flowers.
"Chancellor."
The hazy silhouette of a man appears next to her.
She knows that silhouette. She knows that voice.
"They're beautiful, aren't they?"
"Why are you..." she whispers. "You're dead."
"And you're probably expected somewhere else", Bail counters. "But you decided to come here."
"I wanted to see what became of it", she replies. "I'm sorry, Bail. For everything."
"I'm glad you came to visit." He reaches for her arm, and she can feel the cold touch through the fabric of her cloak. "How's Leia?"
"With me." She tries to keep her voice steady. "She's... doing good work."
"You should've been there", she adds after a pause.
"Mon, listen to me." The silhouette flickers. "Everything went according to plan. I can rest easy knowing that."
The cold sensation creeps up from her elbow to her shoulder. "Now go. You have an entire galaxy waiting for you."
She nods, and the vision vanishes.
"I could really use your advice, old friend", she whispers to no one.
"Hey." She startles at the voice from behind her. "You got this far. One step at a time, alright?"
With that, he's gone. She forces herself to turn away, exhaling slowly.
No point in staying any longer, she thinks. But our old apartment is just around the corner. Might as well...
The apartment complex looks exactly as she remembers. A bit more run down, perhaps, with the once white paint peeling off the walls in gray strips and the dust covering the floors, but apart from that, it stands unchanged.
Apartment 1313.
This door, miraculously, does still respond to her touch. She opens it and peeks inside. Immediately, unease creeps up on her.
"Is there anyone here?" she whispers.
The room remains silent for a moment. Then, a weak voice responds from somewhere within the apartment.
"Mon? Is that you?"
"Who are you?" she asks, frantically looking around, only now realizing that she has nothing to defend herself with.
She involuntarily takes a step back when a familiar figure emerges in front of her. "Mon. Mon, it's me."
"Perrin?!"
"Welcome back." He pauses, averting his eyes. "Have a seat."
She takes a moment to muster him as she sits down on the couch in the living room, now threadbare, and he eventually sits down next to her.
Physically, he seems unharmed, better than before she'd left, even. Thank the Stars. But still...
This isn't the man I remember.
The man she remembered had been jovial, careless, talking about seeking joy and the comfort of a good meal.
Now, he's a little quieter, a little more somber, cheerless, the lines on his face a little deeper, and she isn't quite sure whether it's the course of the years that has taken its toll or whether his joviality had always been a façade.
"You stayed", she blurts out. "All those years, and you're still here."
"... yes." His voice quivers.
"Are you alright?"
"Don't worry about me." He crosses his arms in front of his chest. "Why are you here, Mon?"
"We're on our way back to Chandrila", she explains. "The Empire may be gone, but our work doesn't end there. Chandrila will be our temporary base, and... I wanted to see what became of Coruscant before going home."
"Home." The bitterness in the word isn't lost on her. She tacitly takes his hand in hers and links her fingers with his.
"Come. Come with me. Let's get out of here."
Perrin doesn't respond; he squeezes her hand a little tighter in acknowledgment as they leave the apartment behind and they keep walking without another word until end up back at the spaceport.
She taps her comm. "Erskin."
"Yes Ma'am."
"I'm back at the spaceport."
"Copy that. I'll ready everything."
"I hope you don't mind us having one more passenger", she continues. "Because I happened upon someone whom I have a lot to discuss with."
"Wha-"
Perrin leans towards her. "Thank you, Erskin."
"Is that who I think it is?" She can hear the barely concealed laugh. "Leia, you'll stay here in front with me. These two do have a lot to discuss."
The door of the small shuttle hisses as it opens, then closes behind them with a quiet finality.
"Well, I suppose that's that." She can feel his gaze on her as they settle into their seats. "I didn't think I'd see Chandrila again."
"Why did you stay?" she argues. "You could've gone anywhere."
"I'm not sure", he replies. "But I'm glad I did."
He pauses. "Tell me what happened, Mon."
"You first."
Perrin looks at her with an expression she can't place.
"Alright. Though you might find my story less... inspiring."
"Go on. Surprise me."
"The truth is, I have no recollection of the first few... weeks, maybe months after you left", he begins, "Well. That's only half true. I was too drunk to think clearly for most of it, but have one very... specific yet vague memory. A moment of clarity after the frenzy, perhaps... anyway, at some point I found myself in a limospeeder, feeling terrible, with a woman next to me. No idea of what happened or how I got there or whether I'd done... something stupid."
"After that, I laid low. Somehow pulled myself together, kept up appearances. There's not much more to tell." Silence settles between them for a brief instant before he continues. "You made it clear you do not trust me. I can't fault you for that, much less after what I just told you. But whatever it is you're planning to do, I'll be there to help if you'll have me."
Again, Mon finds herself considering the man next to her.
Again, she sees someone she barely recognizes.
"Say something." He turns slightly, shoulders slumping, avoiding her gaze.
"I..." A sobering realization creeps up on her as she lets her gaze wander out the ship's small window. "You know what? I don't think it particularly matters anymore."
Perrin's attention immediately snaps back to her.
"But..."
"Perrin, listen." She inhales sharply. "Things have changed since I left. Which means things between us..."
"... aren't going to be the same, either." He grimaces. "Yes, I figured as much."
She lets her head sink against his shoulder, and to her surprise, he lets her.
"Before I left, I kept you at an arm's length because I thought I could protect you that way", she says. "I can't undo that. But the Empire is gone now, no more need to put on an act, and... you offered to help, so I'm taking you up on that offer."
"As you wish." His voice is still terse, the words reticent, but she can feel some of the tension subside as the cabin of the ship falls silent again.
"Do you remember", she finally asks, "your speech at Leida's wedding?"
"The constant cloud of sadness. Yes, yes, I remember all too well, unfortunately."
"... you were right, you know."
"That surely isn't something I ever expected to hear from you, of all people."
"You're hearing it now." She attempts a smile. "I thought a lot about that evening after I left. And about that speech."
"And did you find it? The joy? The music buried beneath the noise?"
The music buried beneath the noise.
She thinks back to thirty years ago, her and Perrin standing under a garland of blue blossoms, rain soaking their starched garments.
Late nights in the Senate.
Her and Perrin falling out, then finding their way back together.
Holding Leida in her arms for the first time, a tiny, helpless bundle.
Watching that helpless bundle grow up and eventually forsaking her family, her career, her perfect, cushy life for something bigger than any of them.
To Yavin, sitting by a fire, chatting and forgetting about the war around them for a moment, getting a bit too excited for their own good.
To a hand, a cup of tea, a warm coat offered when it was needed.
To the day her efforts - their efforts - finally paid off and the Empire fell.
To a moment of quiet serenity standing amongst a bunch of flowers that obstinately refused to die.
"Maybe."
Perrin cocks his head, waiting for her to continue.
"And maybe we'll find it again, somewhere."
"Then maybe", he suggests, "We could start looking right here, right now."
"You make it sound so awfully easy."
"Well", Perrin retorts simply, mouth quirking up, "Perhaps it is."
Perhaps, she thinks. Start here, and... keep walking.
Once more, her gaze wanders outside. They must have made the majority of the trip already - Chandrila has come into view, a faint green and blue speck among a tapestry of stars, but there nonetheless.
Keep walking. We've done it before, haven't we? One step at a time. One step at a time. The way under our feet was paved by thousands of these seemingly inconsequential steps, after all.
"Looks like we're almost back", Perrin interrupts her spiraling thoughts. She manages a faint nod as she turns to him.
Will you walk this next part of the way with me?
She reaches out to cup Perrin's cheek with her hand. He tenses for a moment before releasing a trapped breath and pulling her into his arms.
She leans in until their foreheads come to rest against each other. Then Perrin closes the tiny gap between them.
The kiss is gentle, soft, for once not exchanged out of obligation or in the heat of the moment, but to say I'm here. I love you.
He's the first to pull back slightly, breaking the kiss without letting go of her entirely. She keeps her eyes closed for a moment, and when she opens them again, he's still inches from her, and she can see the tears brimming in his eyes despite the low light in the cabin.
"Don't cry." She reaches up to wipe them away. "I promise..."
Perrin shakes his head. His hands grip her shoulders, a little too forceful, still refusing to let go.
"I don't want to hear your promises, Mon." He loosens his grip. "I'm sorry. You coming back so suddenly..."
"I know." Her fingers briefly fiddle with the thin golden band with the twin gemstones, the only link to her old life for many, many years and through every high and low that those years had brought.
Perrin cups her hand with his.
"You still haven't told me what happened."
"Too much to fit it into the few minutes until we land."
Thankfully, he doesn't push the subject any further. He leans back and folds his hands in his lap. "Later, then."
The shuttle finally touches Chandrilan soil. Mon taps her comm again. "Erskin, Leia - thank you. Take the rest of the day off, why don't you."
"Understood", Erskin replies.
Perrin offers her his arm. She hesitates for a moment before taking it, only for his hand to slip away and wander along her back soon after, a tiny spark to a livewire. She doesn't know if she can allow herself to savor it just yet.
One step at a time, alright?
They find themselves in the kitchen of the estate, and for the first time in a long time, Mon finds herself fumbling for words. Finally, her eyes land on the kettle by the stove and she makes a simple offer.
"Tea?"
Perrin acknowledges it with a smirk. "Gladly."
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Well, this was supposed to go up for May 4th but clearly I didn't get it done on time. Hope you still enjoy some fresh MonPerrin content.
Happy Star Wars Day everyone! May the Force be with you always!
Here’s a little something I worked on for this date, done using watercolors on an A4 Canson sketchbook and inspired not only by Yoda, but by one of my all-time favorite Star Wars quotes… Sprinkling the stars was my favorite part of it 😊
I know I promised it'd be Anidala this year but I had this idea in the shower at 1 am some weeks ago. (scroll down for a sweet message)
Have a VelCinta.
Last year's Star Wars Day Post featuring Kanera was a hit, and it was my first art to reach the 1000 mark, so I will forever be grateful to everyone who supported me. There were lovely tags and some death threats LOL, but I'll take them all. I love you all so much 💖
Eventually, I will run out of SW ships to do this with.
jacobvanloon
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