summary. He had lost everything he held dear and he was frightened at the thought of having to lose her too. In Levi's first weeks as a member of the survey corps, he stumbles upon a captain who's morals caught his attention. He never planned to stay, he only planned to leave with his friends after executing their mission, and yet the world seemed to have never favored him from the start.
When The Heart Beats Wattpad + Prologue + Chapter I + Chapter II + Chapter III + Chapter IV + Chapter V + Chapter VI+ Chapter VII
summary ⸺ dearest gentle reader, a new season is upon us as the ton gets ready for a season filled with drama, heartbreak, and passion. after being crowned diamond of the season, duke gojo⸺only looking to marry just to secure his inheritance⸺has his sights set on you, the easiest (and most obvious) option. later, when you catch his saying unsavory things about you on a terrace when he least suspected it, you swear to never marry gojo. as london's fashionable set goes through yet another wedding season, will there be hope for scandalous gossip, hate, and thinly veiled insults, or will we witness blooming love and passion?
genre/warnings ⸺ enemies to lovers, bridgerton au, angst, fluff, eventual smut, jealousy, misogyny, regency era au, gojo being infuriating, reader also being infuriating, both of them are clueless honestly, all they do is bicker 💀
notes from the author: im aashi, and this is my first series on this app :p for anyone who would like to know, this does end with a happy ending. updates will be weekly (unless i announce otherwise). ty for reading!
masterlist
drabble
01 ⸺ the debutante
you begin to get ready for your presentation for your debut this season, and satoru steels himself to find a wife. you don't get the reception you'd wanted from some, and satoru will soon curse himself for letting his tongue loose (6.3k)
02 ⸺ the aftermath
after an eventful first ball after your debut, you continue the season with thinly veiled vexation towards gojo. but fate is not on your side; you and gojo keep encountering each other, matching fire with fire (7.8k)
03 ⸺ the manor
you and gojo have just uncovered your mothers' matchmaking scheme: a plan that sends you both to his extravagant countryside manor in kent, arriving a week earlier than the rest of the ton. the question remains—can you endure gojo's insufferable nature during this secluded stay? (8.3k)
04 ⸺ the game
satoru has some revelations about you. both you and satoru share some quite...happening days at the manor, including an eventful game of pall mall. (4.9k)
you were his last remainder of the happiest blue spring in his life, until your untimely demise. and on the death's door, he finally found you again.
genre/warnings:
angsty wangsty, consolation towards the end
notes:
i said i can't create gojo fics without feeling depressed, so here i present to you, angst. it's inspired from a thread in twitter i read about how gojo was given everything but he couldn't do anything and my heart just incredibly hurts and―this happened. it's unedited because the idea popped into my mind at 1 in the morning
i wrote this while listening to this wonderful song. consider it the theme song for this piece. i highly recommend you to read this and listen to it!
[update]
sequel -> found you
general masterlist
You were so pretty. So really pretty, in fact. And he likes pretty things. Perhaps that was what spurred him to spontaneously ask you out.
You declined him at first―after all, he was a special grade weirdo. And you half-expected him to give up soon enough, only that he didn't. He persisted like a cockroach, smothering you with his very being. Then like a sweet romance novel, you too finally fell for him, melting at his clumsy attempts to woo you.
And by God, you were happy together. To Satoru, it was the brightest, most vibrant page in his life. And with his very being, he would do everything he could to protect you. After all, he was blessed with the best, he had all means to protect you.
He should've known better.
It started with his failed star plasma vessel mission. Riko was dead, and at that time he was just numb. Later, he made excuses. He couldn't have foreseen that a sorcerer killer would join the fray and made a mess of things.
But then his best friend, Suguru, left. Satoru couldn't make excuses any longer. For that, he was wholly responsible. From then, he realized that just being strong wasn't enough. And throughout those dark days, you were with him, consoling him as you brought his head to your chest, letting him sleep in your arms.
"Don't ever leave me, okay?" he whispered at the dead of the night with hoarse voice. It made your heart sting. You nodded and ran your fingers throughout his hair, mumbling a soft "of course."
And you never did. You were always by his side.
Satoru was really grateful for that. To have the last years of your life by his side. Looking back, it was like a beautiful mirage.
He had hidden himself behind the facade of the strongest. The unreachable. Untouchable. It felt nice, still is. Before he had known it, he had drawn this line between himself and other people. Between him and you. He wasn't lonely, but he was at the very same time.
And perhaps he had gotten way too arrogant, and thus the heavens decided to humble him.
He couldn't prevent the Shibuya Incident from happening. Worse, he fell into the enemy's hand and got sealed, and just before he was trapped inside that accursed box, he saw you die. And even after the most excruciating 19 days of his life afterwards, he couldn't do anything about it.
Your face haunted him. The tears you shed for him still lingered at the tips of his fingertips. The blood from your mouth still soaked his vision.
"Satoru..." you croaked. You were afraid. Afraid of dying, but most of all, afraid of leaving him. You had promised him once, on the bunkbed of your dorms back in Jujutsu High, that you wouldn't leave him. Tears wouldn't stop falling from your beautiful eyes.
Satoru burned that image on his mind. He wanted to hate himself with every fiber of his being, but then you said the most damnable thing possible.
"Thank you... for everything..."
And you had a smile on your face. In your last moments, you decided to convey how much he meant to you in this life. How much you cherished him. You prayed with all your heart that it would reach him.
And once again, just like the first day he saw you at the training grounds of Jujutsu High, Satoru found you to be really breathtaking. You were beautiful even as you laid dying. Even as his visions were obscured as he fell into the darkness.
Inside the prison realm where time passed long and uncertain, he made himself numb once again.
You were his most cherished figment of the most precious memory held in his heart―the three years of his youth. He wouldn't have changed anything about it. He was devastated, severely so, but so did the sweetness aftertaste he felt.
Your feelings reached him, and because of that, even if the road ahead was long and hard and painful, he would stay on that road.
If it meant he could meet you again on the other side of this dream... he'd stay and move towards tomorrow, no matter how bleak it was.
When his comrades freed him from the prison realm, he gained knowledge that most people he knew were also dead during his absence. Nanami. Yaga. The students.
Perhaps it was his curse. To be blessed with everything, but not being able to do anything about it.
He had nothing more to lose when he fought against Sukuna. He gave it his all. Everything his life had led him to―he put it all on the line.
And suddenly―suddenly, he was back to the happiest chapter of his youth. Everyone was there. Suguru was there. Nanami, Haibara, even Riko.
And you.
On the other side of that dream, you were once again standing before him, in your old uniform, just like when you’d get ready for a class so many years ago, and with the smile he fell in love with. The smile he would gladly fight the world for.
"Satoru," you called, breathless, but just like before you left him the first time, you frowned and your eyes suddenly glistened with tears. "Why... are you here? How did you―"
But you choked back your tears when he ran to you and pulled you into his arms so tightly. You heard him grunt, and then to your surprise, slightly sob.
Now he is no longer Gojo Satoru, the strongest. He is back to a young sorcerer wanting so badly to live his youth to the fullest, happiest.
"You lied to me," he reprimanded you amidst his weeping. "You left. You freaking left―"
Your vision blurred. "I'm sorry..."
Satoru let you go to have a good look at you. You were no longer bleeding. Your insides were intact. Just a little crying because you couldn't help it.
"I love you, you know that right?" he blurted with the most sullen expression he could muster. He turned back into the child-boy you somehow fell in love with.
"Satoru," you breathed out, anxious. "You shouldn't be here―"
"I should," he cut you with a firm tone. "I have no regrets. I have done what I can, and now―"
"But the others―they need you! They need you, Satoru."
He drooped his head. He had thought it over too, but he had come to a final conclusion. "No. They don't."
Maybe it was finally the time to let go of it. It was time to just... pass it over. No more interventions. No more tipping the balance of the world itself.
Immediately, you understand what he means. Gojo Satoru has served his purpose. There was nothing left that he must and could do.
"You waited long, huh?" you whispered with tears, yet a smile bloomed on your face.
"I did."
"Then... now that you're here," you offered your hand towards him, and then looked at the faces of your friends. They were all beaming at you and him, waiting for this exact moment.
You stared at him fondly, lovingly.
"Would you... walk this road with me once again?"
Satoru snapped his head. He nodded at you with pure certainty, zero hesitation. "Yes."
He took your hand, grasping it tightly in his.
"Even when there's a possibility that you have to walk to the other side of a nightmare again?”
"I would," Satoru resolutely replied.
Because it's you, he would. He'd willingly and gladly cross the throes of hell and set out on this lonely yet hopeful journey, just to meet you.
You chuckled at him heartily, and Satoru felt the immense love he held for you as the two of you walked towards tomorrow, without regrets.
It may be his curse, to have everything yet nothing at the same time. But each time he would be faced with this decision, he'd remember that feeling and let go of everything just for this very chance to live a life with you again.
summary. He had lost everything he held dear and he was frightened at the thought of having to lose her too. In Levi’s first weeks as a member of the survey corps, he stumbles upon a captain who’s morals caught his attention. He never planned to stay, he only planned to leave with his friends after executing their mission, and yet the world seemed to have never favored him from the start.
When The Heart Beats Wattpad + Prologue + Chapter I + Chapter II + Chapter III + Chapter IV + Chapter V + Chapter VI+ Chapter VII
Yes it is I, the leader of this organization in the flesh. Mainly for legal reasons that vary worldwide we may not consider this to be a cult whatsoever. Feel free to let out your pent up aggression you have towards Sera, we of the Serakatsuki will happily listen.
This cult organization was founded the day I am writing this, on the 3rd of July, 2021, by me. When I had realized how terrible Sera is from a fan fiction of @saintobio 's / @saintgojo 's I had to be the responsible woman I am and take action. So here I am, possibly leading a group of savages ready to beat this so called Sera to a pulp.
This cult has an ulterior motive, and that is to rid this planet of disheveled little degenerates like Sera. From the very beginning we had a bad feeling about her, and now that she has shown her true colours and allowed envy to take over her life, our hatred towards her only grows stronger day by day.
Our purpose as possibly the only organization of this kind, is to bring everyone we know and love to hate Sera's guts, just as much as we do. We will break the peace Sera has and bring on an indescribable wrath upon her.
Your dreams of Sera's baby becoming half lizard will soon become reality, just manifest it. For those who have dreams of Sera's life to be completely ruined, just manifest. Others whom wish to see Sera's life fall apart right before her eyes before she finally realizes what she's done... manifest it. They say to always trust your instincts, well it seems my instincts are continuasly screaming at me the word "manifestation" like a sweet chant ringing in my ears.
Now, let us take a minute to visualize The worst things that should happen to Sera. Her going bankrupt and her family, which I actually love, dies. Maybe she actually gives birth to a half lizard baby, maybe even half albino monkey if we're lucky. Just imagine.
It's seems this is the end of our meeting and not so evil doing. Throughout our next encounter, we shall deprecate Gojou and his scandals that are yet to be revealed to the world of the rich and we'll most likely continue the slander on Sera for this is the Serakatsuki after all. For now, let us release our current anger on Sera. Once again I repeat, please do allow the resentment you hold against Sera to roam freely.
description: 3 years since the accident and you’ve regained most of your memories back, but there’s still one missing puzzle piece that only your boyfriend’s best friend can complete. the question is, will you let him?
genre: heavy angst, past lovers, amnesia
general masterlist
+ one + two + three + four + five + six + seven + eight + nine + ten + eleven + twelve +
summary. with an arranged marriage set in place, the sacred bond is doomed with a wife who wants to make the relationship work and a husband who’s ready to ruin it all. unknown to him, a tragic fate already lies within the pages of your romance book.
genre. heavy angst, arranged marriage, modern au, 18+
fic warnings. mean!gojo, adultery, profanity, explicit smut, violence, family drama, descriptions of social classes, mentions of pregnancy, undertones of masochism, undertones of manipulation
general masterlist + fanart + playlist
+ one + two + three + four + five + six + seven + eight + nine + ten + eleven + twelve + thirteen + fourteen + fifteen +
omg i lost the ask but i managed to copy it from my phone!
anon asked:
Hi! I was wondering if you could do a Levi x reader where the reader is always nice and caring towards everybody, especially Levi because she sees how hurt he’s been in the past. Her kindness always confuses him so he pushes her away and during one expedition everything went wrong and he finds her dead body and just stares at it while breaking inside. Totally understand if you can’t or don’t want to! Thank you!
Hi dearie! Thank you for requesting! And yes I’m alive I am so sorry for my almost 1 year hiatus:)
Requested Oneshot
Word Count: 4260
Genre: Angst
Synopsis: Wherein Levi thinks about the possibilities of a Lifetime.
Was there a lifetime waiting for us…
In a world where I was yours?
Levi eyed the young female who silently sat beside him. The night breeze gently blowing away her delicate [c] hair as her shinning [c] eyes reflected the moon above them.
The ride was bumpy yet everyone were too tired to even care.
Some were asleep as they were too exhausted from the fight against Kenny’s squad, and some, along with Levi find it hard to even blink as everything had just been too surreal.
A massive ‘lump of skin’ as the stern captain called it, was crawling itself ahead to the wall.
And as nights were usually chilly, tonight was an exception, for the Titan’s steam had served as a giant convector.
Levi can still feel the faint aches in his ankle, and the bumpy ride home, along with his other multiple scratches and wounds weren’t helping.
And yet though the male captain was hurting both inside out, he can still feel the overwhelming sense of peace radiating within him as he felt her presence alive and well on his beside.
Like a fire left amidst winter, fighting the cold cruel gusts of snow and wind.
Closing his steal colored eyes, Levi couldn’t help but reminisce some memories that had always lingered at the back of his mind.
Memories that had never left no matter how hard he tried to submerge it within the confines of his chaotic work.
He never understood why those memories never faded, why he would always find himself remembering in the middle of his sleepless nights. Feeling the slightest bit of nostalgia as he did.
He never understood, yet he never complained.
I was scared to lose you then,
But secrets turn into regrets,
Buried feelings grow,
Oh, you were a good dream.
The skies were low and dark that day. The thick clouds, grey as the stones he pulled from the quarry, gave the monochromatic world outside a claustrophobic feel.
By this time of day, the birds should have been singing and the horizon tinged with reds and pinks, oranges sometimes. But the weather was accountable as if to reflect the feelings of a certain soldier who have just lost his dearest friends in battle.
Under the shade of a giant tree stood Levi, among two huge stones, each engraved with the names: Isabel and Farlan.
He could smell the aroma of the freshly cut grass beneath his feet. Staring idly at his makeshift grave, he couldn’t help but let out a trembling sigh.
Don’t Regret.
Levi heard footsteps nearing him making his senses at high alert, yet he chose not to turn to the sound. He was just too tired to fight.
Even now he was fighting, fighting not to crumble down in front of his friends’ grave, as his legs were so close to giving in to gravity.
The footsteps continued, Levi hearing everytime it would step on the grass, until it halted, just a meter away from him.
“Levi… right?” it whispered, he could hear her voice trembling.
Other than a small noise of acknowledgement, Levi never said anything else.
“I’m sorry I followed you… it’s just… ” her voice continued trembling, eventually trailing off not being able to finish what she had wanted to say.
Clearing her throat, she attempted to start again, “It might rain and, I figured out you would make these for them, I just wanted to pay my respects.”
Levi remained silent as if the female was never really there. He could hear some small shuffling but he chose to ignore it.
(Y/N) started inching forward to the huge stones, kneeling infront of Isabel’s she couldn’t help but place a hand on her lips.
Tears started flowing as her small kneeled form started trembling along. Levi observed.
She gently placed a small pack of candy along with a hand picked rose, moving to Farlan’s, she placed another rose similar to the one at Isabel’s.
Levi noticed the small pack of candies and his eyes widened at the familiar wrapper.
“Isabel! Can’t you throw these in the right place?” Levi pointed out noticing a small pile of candy wrappers littering the table as he cleaned.
“Oh! Sorry Levi-bro! These are just so delicious I can’t stop eating them!”
So this is who it came from.
“I’m sorry, me and Isabel just started being friends and…” (Y/N) stood up as she continued, Levi could hear her small sniffs as she trembled:
“She always told me stories about you, never failing to express her admiration. And so after what happened, I knew I should go and meet you.”
Silence.
“Say Levi… Hope we could be great friends in the future!” turning her way to meet Levi’s gaze, she held out her hand smiling as tears continued to flow out of her shining [c] eyes.
_-_-_
“(Y/N)! Stop! The others are alerting them already!” Hange shouted as the Survey Corps’ soldiers ran in rampage and chaos.
The sounds of stressed horses neighing, bodies cracking as Titan’s munched down the soldiers one by one and the frantic yells of the frightened weren’t helping.
Commander Keith Shadis’s plan on having their HQ beyond the walls was backfiring hard. Titans begun appearing everywhere making it too late for everyone to react.
The other bases scattered around the forest were yet to be alerted about this, making (Y/N) stood to be the one to move.
“Many soldiers are still there! Don’t you care for them!”
Levi was still there.
“But its too…!!” Hange’s pleases were yet to be heard as (Y/N) made her horse gallop into the forest. Large steps were heard from the east, alerting the female of incoming titans from her left.
Just a little closer…
Finally arrived at her destination her eyes frantically darted everywhere in search of titans roaming around, yet unlike their side of the base, it was almost peaceful here.
And the titan’s coming from the east, she heard them, why was it so peaceful…?
“EVERYONE!! THE BASE HAD BEEN BREACHED! COMMAND TO RETREAT HAS BEEN DECLARED!” (Y/N) shouted making the squad leaders order their squads around.
Amidst all the havoc, (Y/N) searched for the male who had been her primary goal in fleeing to this scene.
He was no where in sight. The male still tended to be somewhat stubborn with following orders from his captain and so wasn’t he much in the social side, making the young female worry for his safety in times of these.
If things were to happen and he ended up in need of saving, nobody would even dare helping him.
That’s why if even if it costs her safety, even if the whole world were against him, even if no one would help him, she would and she’ll never think twice.
“Where’s Ackerman? Sir?!” (Y/N) asked Levi’s current squad leader only to be faced by trembling captain.
“H-he said he’d just be–”
“And you let him?! I’ll make sure this is reported once we’re back!” (Y/N) shouted clearly irritated at his incompetence.
This was why Levi wouldn’t follow orders.
And that’s when it dawned her, the Titans coming from the east was yet to even be spotted.
Making her horse gallop once more, she headed straight to the east.
Her hands dugged deeper into her horse’s reigns, she was unsure of what she was doing.
It may even cause her life, and yet she couldn’t find herself turning back and retreating along with the others.
Slicing the nape of the last titan seen, Levi hopped on to one of the giant trees filling the forest.
He plopped himself down as he sighed softly.
His gas was almost gone and his blades were all worn out as well. Someone might had already alerted everyone to retreat and it would be impossible for him to catch up to them without a horse.
'Guess I’ll be dying here… at least it felt good… having to protect humanity at least once.’
Slowly, Levi let his grip on his blades loosen.
As the blades fell, he closed his eyes, the scent of dried blood lingering in his nose.
Letting out a small, almost invisible smile, he let himself fall 50 feet from ground.
“LEVI!”
It all went so fast.
A second there he felt the slightest bit of fear rushing through his body as the air resisted his fall.
And then there he was, dangling mid air, as a familiar face managed to have grabbed his arm, now holding onto it as if her life depends on it.
'Stupid… I should be the one holding on to you like that.’
“ARE YOU CRAZY?! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?!”
Levi stared, unable to comprehend the woman’s actions.
Why was she here?
Why was she so angry?
And was she… crying?
“Remember when you said you won’t ever do something that will lead you to regretting it afterwards?!” her breathing was ragged as tears fell one by one on her angry scrunched face, it was a sight Levi couldn’t ever get over with.
“Just now–! Just now if I were even a minute too late!!” (Y/N) hoisted Levi up, and as soon as she did, her finger landed square on his chest pushing his back against the tree as she continued:
“You might’ve regretted it! It might’ve been something you’ll regret for a lifetime Levi!”
“Why the hell are you so angry?” was his only reply. It was hushed and almost unfathomable, he knew she was right.
And up until now Levi knew that if he did die that day, he would’ve regretted it for a lifetime.
_-_-_
“The hell’s that?”
It was yet another chilly night, and Levi chose to take a short stroll around the Survey Corps’ HQ.
The latter couldn’t sleep and so here he was now, walking around, his feet leaving small tracks on the damp ground.
He couldn’t help but feel lighter than usual. Taking a walk with no gear strapped around his body was something he found really relaxing, aside from cleaning of course.
His tracks halted upon seeing a familiar figure hunched near a bush not to far from him.
Squinting his eyes he walked closer to the female, curious of what would’ve caught her attention.
And there, shaking behind the bush was a dog. Levi could smell the awful scent the mammal was giving off making him cover his nose with his hand and asking a question which made the hunched figure bounce in surprise.
“Its a… well…” (Y/N) was panicked in giving off an answer. She frantically thought of an answer that would save her from punishments but when her eyes met his, she knew it would’ve been a futile attempt to lie.
Thus hanging her head in dejection as she pleaded softly, “Please don’t tell anyone, I’ve been feeding it for days and it didn’t cause any trouble.”
Levi tutted as he continued to walk away from her. She was going to cry again, he could tell and he want anything but that.
The male had found out recently that the female was faint hearted and would cry even for the slightest of things.
Her crying was something Levi couldn’t handle. His usually stoic and aloof figure would instantly shatter as he grew frantic in search of a way to stop her from crying.
“Just do something about the damned smell. Fucking smells like shit.”
The night after that, Levi stumbled upon the young female seated at the corner of an empty stable, brushing the dog clean.
_-_-_
“Levi!” a soft voice called from behind the wooden door of the latter’s office.
Buried within the loads of paperworks towering the young captain’s desk, the only thing he could do was to mumble a “come in” as he could not stand up to get the door for who ever was on the other side.
“Working again Captain?!” (Y/N) exclaimed upon barging into Levi’s office.
Levi just hummed in reply, not even sparing a glance at the female who was now working herself through his small kitchen.
Not long had passed and the office was now filled with the pleasant smell of black tea, brewing.
Levi had a small smile plastered on his face as he continued to work overtime.
Every night, (Y/N) would always barge into his office as he worked overnight only to do small little things like making him tea and small snacks.
It became part of their usual. Levi never finding it irritating, only because she would leave as if she never was there in the first place, everything clean and organized, as they both shared the same sense of cleaning.
After a few more shuffling and the continuous whistle of the heated pot, a small teacup was now placed infront of him with a small clank.
Levi mumbled as small “Thanks” as he took a sip, the liquid instantly making him awake and livelier. Her tea always had suited his taste.
“Levi, I’ll bring these with me.” finally looking up from his work, Levi watched as (Y/N) carried a basket with her. It was his laundry.
“You don’t have to, I can take care of that.” he plainly said their eyes meeting in the process.
“No worries, being a captain is a lot of work, just do your job without dying for me that’s all I ask for.” and there she was again, leaving with his weeks worth of laundry with her.
“Wait.” It was the first time Levi stopped her before she could leave through the door, making her turn to him in a jumpy manner.
“Thanks…”
Silence filled the air as they stared at each other.
“Levi… ”
“The hell are you crying for?”
“…Levi…”
“The fuck! Stop crying, you’re staining my floor.”
“I’m not crying! You’re crying!”
“You’re crazy… ”
_-_-_
December 25th of year 847.
It was yet another busy day for the Survey Corps. Winter was already coming and the whole legion was yet to be prepared for the upcoming cold season.
Levi stood in front of his office barrack, cold wind grazing his form ever so often.
Amidst his body’s own battle against the scorching cold wind, he continued to stand tall, stuffing his hands within the confines of his long warm work suite. He was waiting for something.
It was his birthday and the latter knew that anytime soon his young captain would be greeting him. Popping up out of nowhere like how she always did.
Why was he waiting? He couldn’t help but furrow his brows as he was confused with himself.
Making one last look at his surroundings Levi decided to let it go and continue on with his usual endeavors.
He turned around, his boots making soft clanks on the wooden floor, and as Levi was nearing the door to his office, he noticed a red box on the doorway.
Sneaky as always.
A smile formed on his lips as he crouched down to reach the present.
To my Dearest Levi
Happy Birthday!
With much love,
(Y/N) (L/N)
Levi caressed her printed name on the card. He’d always loved how neat her handwriting was. His smile was bigger and more visible now. She had never failed to make him the happiest on his birthday since the day she arrived in his life.
Opening the door a warm hug, concealing all the cold feeling of being outside for even a short period of time had enveloped him. His smile was bigger.
“Levi!”
_-_-_-_-_
Tangled with another’s eyes,
Never mind, you were never mine,
Glimpse of me and you,
Oh, you were a good dream.
“Levi?” her soft voice rang silently, lifting Levi up as he drowned within his sea of thoughts.
Cold steal eyes met her warm [c] orbs, each almost shining at the sight of the other.
Levi felt something within him, he couldn’t quite fathom, yet it was a pleasant one. For the first time he felt safe within the confines of her warm gaze.
“We’ve gone so far from where we were before… don’t you think?” (Y/N) couldn’t quite determine whether she was talking about humanity or something else, but she felt the need to let it out otherwise.
The horses’ continuous hooves meeting with the ground beneath filled the silence surrounding their wagon.
(Y/N) had already anticipated Levi’s usual lack of replies and had already expected him to just make a noise of acknowledgment and such.
The reason why the latter had the slightest look of shock visible in her gentle visage as he said:
“We did… so you better hang in there til’ the end and its all over, (Y/N).”
I’d spend a lifetime waiting in vain,
Just to go back to the way we were before.
Days had passed since one of their young cadets named Historia had finally been crowned queen. The people of the walls couldn’t help but express diverse reactions about the sudden change of rulers.
Yet it didn’t stop the Survey Corps from fulfilling another important task, one that was the root of several of their latest expeditions. Finally, they were to know about the truth, the truth hidden within the basement of Grisha Jaeger.
Unlike any other expeditions, today was the first time they were acknowledged and celebrated by their own people, and this made the soldiers leave with pride and solidity in every step they make.
And yet here they were, ambushed and trapped by several of titans controlled by the beast. Behind them was the armored titan, climbing the walls for the purpose of either capturing Eren or slaughtering their horses to avoid them from fleeing.
Neither were they able to know the location of Bertholdt who can transform into the colossal titan at any moment much to their unfortune. They were caged at a dead end.
Everything was crumbling in front of their eyes, Erwin started to wonder whether he could even get to see the basement as he sought for a plan to turn things around for the survey corps.
(Y/N) stood beside Levi and the other squad captains, she could feel herself shaking and yet she fought the urge to crumble in front of her own squad, in front of Levi.
Just then, the smaller sized titans, all three to four meters tall, had started to run forward, each having diversely odd ways of running. (Y/N) could feel Levi’s figure stiffened at the sight.
“They’re moving! Multiple three to four meters approaching!” Hange was quick to announce the movements of their foe.
Erwin’s brows had furrowed deeper as he continued to think of ways to avoid the beast from having everything in his filthy hands.
The loud crunching of crushed cement, signaling that the Armored was already close in reaching the top where everyone stood, caused several gasps and cries from the soldiers around Erwin.
“Commander! The Armored Titan is close! And we still don’t know where Bertholdt is!” Armin shouted, Erwin blinking as he did.
“Yes, I know.” was his only reply.
(Y/N) could feel Levi’s restlessness radiating through his body, reaching out, she soothed the male’s arm, causing his frown to cease a little.
Erwin’s small intake of air, gesturing the start of his commands had Levi speaking before Erwin could even start.
It was his own way to at least ease the stress and burden he knew Erwin was going through right now.
“Are you finally ready to say something? I could’ve had breakfast during the wait.”
(Y/N)’s eyes went wide as she was able to catch up with Levi’s humor, yet she couldn’t bring herself to laugh, her own fear of the current situation wouldn’t let her.
Instead, she bumped her shoulder against Levi’s, cliche as it was, the small gesture had the corner of Levi’s lips slightly twitching upward.
No one dared to look at the other.
“Dirk Squad and (Y/N) Squad, eliminate all of the smaller Titans before they get to the horses.”
Hearing her orders, (Y/N) started arranging and testing her gear as she gestured her squad to do the same.
Levi’s eyes continued to observe her in his peripheral.
This was it, if they both were able to finish their orders alive, everything will be back to normal, they’d even be able to go through beyond, this was a quest of truth after all.
“Levi Squad and Hange Squad, you’ll be battling with the Armored Titan. Engage the Thunder Spears according to plan, Protect Eren at all cost.” Erwin’s booming voice commanded, the rest of the squads discussing their own orders.
A sudden gust of cool wind, blew the scouts’ coats, making them dance through the air, the symbol of the wings of freedom waiting to be freed.
“This day! This Battle!”
“Humanity’s safety is at sake!”
“Once again! My Soldiers! Dedicate your Hearts!”
Everyone was in need of those words, and so once again, dedicating their hearts for humanity, the soldiers flew free in quest of truth.
Reaching on the ground, (Y/N) had instantly started to engage with their mindless foes, her squad diligently following behind her.
They needed to settle everything before the beast decides on making his next move.
“Finish killing the smaller ones already!”
That voice…
(Y/N) landed on one of the roofs as she watched the onyx haired captain order everyone around.
“Get done before the beast titan decides to move!”
She could feel her heart skip a beat as his cold steal eyes met with hers.
“And no casualties! Don’t you dare die!”
“Yes sir!” everyone shouted as they run all in different directions.
(Y/N) watched as her entire squad struggled to deal with the small titans, they were close to killing every last one of the Titans on the West side, yet half of the kills were done by her blades.
Clearly, the Survey Corps wasn’t as strong as they were before.
Her blades were all worn out, she needed to refill yet she also couldn’t leave her squad behind.
“Leave them to me, go and replace those worthless blades.”
“Levi!” landing on her side, Levi watched as one of her cadets tumbled as he landed on the roof, nearly having himself as titan food.
“Hurry, we don’t know how much time we have 'til that ape does something shitty.” Levi gestured to the Beast Titan’s direction using one of his blades.
“Those are worn out as well.” (Y/N) pointed out, noticing the blade he used to emphasize the beast, taking note that the latter only has 1 pair of spare blades.
“You simply can’t help but stuck your nose on to others business can’t you?” withdrawing the blades to his sides, Levi rested both of his hands on his hips.
“Can’t you say it any nicer? Like, 'You really care about people don’t you?’ or something?” mimicking Levi’s actions, (Y/N) also had her hands on her waist as she faced him.
“It means the same thing doesn’t it? Now go.”
Smiling to herself, (Y/N) then flew above the walls. Levi watching as she did.
He didn’t know what was happening, one moment he was ordering the cadets around, (Y/N) who had just came back from getting blades was beside him.
She was just there, smiling like how she always used to. The next thing he knows he was running, he was chasing. As rocks of different shape flew around him, he didn’t care. He was breathlessly begging from who was there up above that she was safe.
“Why had I let you go… Damn it..!”
He was panicking, his brain was in chaos, he was frustrated, he was angry, irritated…. But among those emotions one stood out. He was scared.
Scared that he’d loose her before having to tell her his feelings.
Scared that as he neared the alley in which he saw her fell, he’d see her lifeless body.
Scared that he’d have to go through this again.
Scared that it was HER this time.
“Did you know…?” He wonders.
He fell on his knees, he couldn’t go any closer.
Levi heard a loud deafening scream, his thoughts were silent, too silent. The scream was his.
'Did you know that you weren’t going to make it?
He looked up, as tears went down his widened eyes, cursing the ones from above. He couldn’t breathe.
Did you know you were going to have given everything you had because you weren’t going to be with me afterward?’
Was it the wrong time, what if we tried…?
Giving in a little more?
To the warmth we had before.
She was his first friend.
His first comrade.
His first opponent.
And no matter how hard he pushed her away because of her confusingly kind actions, he couldn’t help but be fond of her because of it.
She was different.
His relationship with her was different and they both know it.
It was different from his and Erwin’s.
His and Hange’s.
His and his comrades…
It was a deeper and fuller relationship, it might’ve been love but they both knew it wasn’t the right lifetime.
But he couldn’t help but think, what if they did give it a try?
What if they did gave into the warmth?
Would she still be by my side?
Would she still be here?
He couldn’t help but think, he couldn’t help but regret.
As he stared at her lifeless body infront of him.
She was his first love.
And the most torturous of his millions of heartbreaks.
Is there a lifetime waiting for us?
All this time, I have been yours.
Liquor might help you escape, but it would never get you out from the truth.
The whole house was dark due to how all of the curtains were closed. There’s no way moonlight could illuminate the space he was in right now. And it was his intention to do so, to just engulf himself in total darkness.
Occasionally, his phone would light up, blinding him numerous times until he decided to flip the screen towards the surface. The room reeked with alcohol and sweat, like you could find a dead body somewhere in the room.
Bottles scattered all around the floor, some even still have the contains inside, making the liquid dripped down the wooden floor. He didn’t care at all, what he needed was the alcohol to repel the pain away,
