Untitled

Changing the world.

[antcassese]

Whats business like Ant?

Sun Goes Down - Bruno Martini

PLAY IT AND READ

Wow,

It’s been awhile since I’ve typed anything good up, or even anything at that.

I think this is a good one though.

The last few months have transformed me in many ways. I’ve sat around digesting the many pains from last year and most of this year. But, there comes a time when you can no longer dwell. I cant even say i like to dwell but i like to think of the past so that i never find myself making the same mistakes. 

This year has sucked for me though, and for most of you as well. We’ve experienced pain of every multitude, we have felt heart break from relationships and careers falling through. How crazy? The year COVID-19 came along and literally froze all of our lives.

Make no mistake though, some peoples lives have been nothing shy of beautiful this year. Businesses have sprouted like never before, marriages are happening  in everyone's backyards, and adversity of any kind ceases to exist.

I recently started and launched my business online for face masks. This has by far been one of my most proud moments. I have endured adversity like never before in the last year, but moreso, my whole life. I have been riddled with bullshit and nonsense from a young age. I was okay with being the underdog.

You should be okay with that too on one condition. 

You HAVE TO believe in something that truly only you will ever understand.

For me, it’s about connections and making an impact. I mean that from the heart. 

That's where my business came into play.

Now I do not have a major in economics, I am not savvy with the books, I am not a genius online marketer in any way. I actually have a bad learning disability that has been hard for many many years for me to overcome. (don't feel bad, I don't need the pity). You read that right I have a learning disability. 

I don't remember anything. Nothing at all. You would almost think I’m totally clueless when talking to me but just know the answers are there, it just takes me longer to get to them. But one thing I excel in is obsession. 

Memory recall is clearly not there. Ha. So Ant, how’d you start a business?

You'll never make it! Your not that smart! Youll fail!

I'm doing better then some of my smartest friends and family though. Because you are educated does not mean you are intelligent.

I obsess, I need things to be perfect. While you work on you’re business for a few hours and know it well. I work for days, sleepless nights. I know my business better then anyone. You will never beat me out because I may not be the smartest, but damn I’ll outwork you any day of the week.

Business has been fun, hard, and challenging in many ways. I have gained so much from this, but I’ve lost way to much at the expense of better myself.

Isn’t that fucked? YUP.

I’ll never understand. I always genuinely want people to be better, and take unthinkable risks to further the life they live. I always support people in every way and push to be their biggest cheerleader. That's me. That's why lifelong connections are so important to me. 

Business is interesting. Just make sure you remember who you started with and who had you're back, and actually supported you.

Didn't just say they would support you and then fall of the face of the earther. You see it’s much easier to say an empty statement instead of following through with something meaningful. 

That goes for anything. Be wary of people that don’t follow through. Be highly suspicious. You want doers, go getters on you’re team. 

I mean, I know I do.

This goes for anything in life, not just running a face mask business and waiting for people to buy out the inventory. This goes for everyday interactions, relationships, careers. 

If you want to be taken seriously, if you want to do the unthinkable. 

Just remember, you must be willing to do the unimaginable.

I’ve got your back, even if you don't have mine. That's the person I am.

Business as usual everyone. 

[antcassese]

Whats been going on in my life? Can you handle it?

Everyone knows the rules.... song choice first and foremost!

All My Life - Foo Fighters, damn this song gets me going.

The last 6 months feel almost like a blur. I think a lot of us can relate to this? Im certain I’m not the only one that had a crazy 2020. I’ve literally watch so many of you fall victim to job loss, relationships falling out, and just all around chaos. I’ve witnessed you guys experience this! Just like you’ve watched me, from a distance you’ve watched me.

You’ve watched as my marriage crumbled. You’ve heard about me moving into a damn shed. You watched me walk away from a well paying position. You seen me cry, you’ve seen me talk ill of people in a way not even I condone, unless otherwise provoked.. You’ve been there for me, and didn't even know it. I knew it though. 

Starters, I lost my dad around Christmas in 2019. This man didn't take anyone's shit, even if they had him by the balls. He was sweet, loved his family, but absolutely took no shit. He was the fucking man, but as life goes. We all live to die. During this time, I was still with my wife. A time that I needed to focus, I needed to keep my family together. I was the man now, and it was time to act. 

I had a hard time being intentional having my wife constantly hold me back. It was hard to mourn when I had a significant other who insisted the attention be on her over my parent I lost. This was the the beginning of the end for my marriage, sadly.

I married into what I believed was someone who had the same morals, same ideologies as me. I was sadly mistaken, and after learning the we were on two different wavelengths, the universe did it’s thing. In a matter of a couple months, after many disturbing dealing’s with my wife, I had to cut my losses. This simply was a bad investment and I had to get the fuck out of dodge.

I'm sure you’ve been there, hell, you may be dealing with this as we speak. Constantly asking yourself, “Is this it?” “Is this person really for me”? 

Or maybe you are 10000% certain about what you have, in that case, I am happy for you.

BUT if you’re asking yourself those questions, there's already a problem. Run while you have a chance.

My dad died, god bless his soul. He was a dad, with shortcomings but still, a dad. Losing him crushed me. My marriage? Shit happens! It obviously wasn’t meant to be, and no it wasn’t a mistake! Never! I don't regret it for one second. It just didn’t quite pan out. It’s okay, I had bigger plans waiting for me....

One door closes, another opens! Always be willing to go where the wind blows you, never know where it could take you.

In the mix of a divorce, came leaving my well paying job. I really enjoyed the work I did, having worked in Manhattan for sometime was a huge accomplishment that not many people can say they’ve done. But frankly, It didn't fill me up anymore. It didn’t cut it for me. 

As much as I love money, as most of you know. Some referring to me as even frugal at times, the money couldn’t buy my sanity. Everyday I fought the demon in my head to quit. I wanted to quit because I wanted to dedicate my life to making an impact, not just making money. This was hard for anyone to understand from the outside looking in, it was hard for even me to understand what the hell I was attempting to accomplish by quitting my job to pursue, what? Making an impact doesn't pay the bills? Know what I mean. But I stopped thinking, and one day I snapped. 

I snapped, I was done thinking about my plans, and instead. It was time to start acting. Simple as that

To me, making an impact is and always will be more important then money. I hear from many of you everyday thanking me and praising me for writing, my vlogs, my one on one conversations. THAT SHIT MOVES ME!

You wouldn’t believe how full I am after hearing I made an impact in a strangers life. 

That's what is important to me. Making a difference, one soul out of time. The money is nice but it doesn't move me the way it moves some. I have to know I helped someone at the end of the day or I feel empty.

This is how I’ve found myself. and these days, I'm not playing games. It’s crunch time, come along or get the fuck out of the way.

These last few months have been devastating for me though.. They have torn me in directions that I didn’t know were even possible. I can’t stress how hard life has hit me.

But guess what?

I am so fucking thankful for it. I literally couldn’t be more happy that my life has played out this way. 

My dad passing hurt so bad, hurt. But his passing finally revealed to me what it’s like to be a man. He showed me, and since December, I’ve been a bull. Everything that was meant to break me, only fueled me.

Every set back only made me buck harder, every single day.

My marriage was important because my parents never got married, and I owed it to myself to get married and live a happy life. Being married doesn't necessarily bring happiness though, reality check! 

No job? Whatever

You see, living amongst chaos is normal to me! I love this shit.

I literally strive off of the chaos. My best friend turned out to betray me, as I suspected he would. Never felt betrayal so great. I couldn’t be more grateful for his choice, as life has a way of revealing itself guys.

find solace in the hell you might be in. we all feel hell somewhere in our life. double down, get a plan together, and be ready to execute.

Don't be a victim, no one likes a sissy. 

Next blog isn’t about whats happen to me this year, it’s alllllll about what is going to be happening!

#ONLYTHEFUTURE

Buckle up. Love yall

[antcassese]

how close is close enough?

Skipping my usual on the music recommendation tonight. but damn is this gonna be good.

Away on vacation currently, I could be doing a number of things. I could be out with friends, out with family, out doing unproductive things that I love but bring me only temporary happiness. 

Of course making memories is the most important part of my life, but unless it is work, I usually find it to be a waste of time... Not sure why I always have to be working but against my own free will, my mind always wants to go go go.

I’m sitting out by the pool tonight with my feet in the water, trees competently surrounding the property of the Airbnb my family and I are staying at for vacation. There's some soft 40′s music in the background, which is my go to genre. Mom is yapping away on the phone in the distance with grandma about what the last day of our travel has included. Who knows where the remainder of our pack is, but I know one thing for sure, happiness overwhelmed me at some point.

Don't fuck off, hear me out. Were all only human here and we all feel things. We all have an ever changing life. Relationships and work has been the constant change for me in the last couple months. But for others, for you, it could be just life in general.

Shit is always on the move, always moving so fast and changing rapidly. 

Anyway, I thought to myself, and how hard I’ve been working on some projects that have yet to spring there maturity, which is obviously discouraging at times. Especially for me, being so hard on myself. But!

It dawned on me, out of left field. Totally out of no where. This crazy insight.

I'm literally on the cusp of some great things. I'm literally walking the tight rope of life from one side to the next and I realized I'm quickly approaching the end of the line.

This was a major breakthrough. This was MAJOR. No joke, all bullshit aside.

With every hit I’ve taken, every disappointment I’ve faced, every jerkoff to put me down. All of it. It hit me, I am literally on the brink of something so great, so so great. I hope you can understand this. Because this is for you, as a kind reminder of how powerful you are how strong willed you are, and can be.

Scoring that big job, scoring a great work/life balance, even a relationship.. Or being utterly defeated because the harder you try, the less you receive with these everyday things. 

Either way, face with defeat or greatness, you too are near greatness. Think of that time you felt unstoppable, or imagine what being unstoppable could feel like. Picture it, whatever brings you joy. 

For me? Making an impact in a profound way so one day when this is all over, I know this all wouldn't be for nothing. 

Tonight, I struck gold. Through simple thinking and being committed to the things I’m passionate about. I hit it big.

The big but within now is preserving this feeling of greatness, or this imagination of greatness. To me, whether its a pigment of my imagination or not, its very much so real.

You too, can feel this. You too, may have already felt this. 

If you’re a mile away from where you want to be, remind yourself how great you can be. If you’re an inch away from greatness, never forget that feeling of being so overwhelmed being so close to the next big thing in you’re life.

Preserve the greatness, that's what makes this all worth it.

Even when playing this game of life, totally fucking sucks.  It be like that sometimes.  

Do you’re thing. Period.

[antcassese]

My cardinal mistake blew up in my face

First things first! Music choice! Sunday Morning - Maroon 5 ((((Must play while reading)))) This week I wrote a piece, a piece that I wrote strictly out of frustration and hurt. I wasn’t thinking clearly and felt that piece didn’t paint an accurate picture of who I am, and “the turn the other cheek” approach to life I live.

We’ve all been there, where maybe our emotions get the best of us. But for me, I am a logical guy, never letting my emotions get the best of me. It’s a quick way to lose a grasp on reality.  It was a cardinal mistake, but as I said, I’m a flawed dude. I’m fucked up, just like the rest of us. In some way, and my cardinal mistake back fired. I set out to make someone feel empty, something I don’t promote and all it did was make me feel empty. We should always find hope in making another persons life better. Despite the indifferences that are so profound, it can be hard to ignore, we have to be better. And we can be better. It makes me question why don’t we spend more time trying to be better people? Did it make me a bad person to say what I said, no matter how accurate? At the end of the day, it’s just that simple. It is okay to feel frustrated but we must always find ourselves in the worst of situations, trying to turn the page on our own behavior. Find yourself in an emotionally charged reaction and get a grip. Or in my case, sticking to my DNA, stick to who I am. And that’s being grateful and understanding, even when it hurts like hell. and trust me, sometimes and somethings hurt like a motherfucker. Even when there may be pain in my life, there’s always reasons to be grateful, and to never lose my cool.  And if you don’t have anything to be grateful for, take action. Take action right now. We have to get away from the typical “misery loves company” bullshit. We have every reason, every opportunity to be better people. Don’t find yourself filling a void at ANYONES expense, ever. We are one of a kind in every way, we must act and behave in a way that’s indicative of that very fact.

Stop fucking with peoples lives, stop fucking with you’re own. Love y’all

[antcassese]

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[antcassese]

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[antcassese]

Life isn't hard. You just make it harder.

Music is our life. It is for me at least. Going forward, I want to attach the song that made me write that day. Motivation doesn't always strike the same time as inspiration, luckily we have music to get our ass in gear.

Today happens to be a Soundcloud favorite that I've listened to quite a bit recently...

Ecstasy - Prospa

Ohhhhhh, where do I even begin? Obviously, I love talking about life and all that it has to offer. I'm not quite sure why that is. Maybe I'm just a dreamer, a visionary of sorts?

Now picture this before you go on, while were still on the topic of the values of life.

My wife just left me recently (we agreed a mutual parting was imperative). I let her take anything she wanted out of our apartment. I feel even though things didn't quite workout, I could never abandoned a person. That's not right, and not something I believe in. 

Anyways, she left me a TV and our bed. Yes, that's all I currently own. 

As I write this, I sit in my 15$ beach chair I purchased a few weeks back to sit on something other then my bed. I'm nestled away in a corner of what would be my Livingroom/Kitchen. My beach chair sits on an old area rug, a rug that I’d sooner burn then use for any purpose whatsoever.. but here we are. Oh cant forget the nightstand I have to set my computer on once and awhile. 

That's it in a nutshell.  

With that picture in you’re head now, lets move on to the more pressing matters of this post.

Life is tough. It’ll knock you down, kick you around, spit on you, chew you up and spit you’re ass right back out. I know from experience how dirty life can treat you sometimes. It is downright wrong. Good people have bad things done to them. We go through hell in back with relationships, careers, further education, and literally anything you can imagine.

There is a time in place for everything I’ve learned.

Today, I experienced, as I hope most people have experienced at some point in their life, a coming to God moment. Corny? So what. 

(I'm silently chuckling)

I realized just how hard I make life sometimes. I don't make it hard for other people, at least I try not to, but I make it harder for myself. 

What I mean is, growing up sucked at times. We grew up poor, disadvantaged and frankly, didn't meet whatever the standard was. Life truly sucked. But, it was actually hard. Some days were impossible. Those were our circumstances. 

Was there going to be dinner? Was I gonna miss another field trip because the three dollar fee was to much? Did mom have 75 cents to make it halfway to work on the NJ Transit to only walk the rest of the way? 

Times were impossible.

Nowadays, its just the same. I just lost my wife, I’m on the cusp of leaving my current occupation, and ill be living in a shed in a months times. 

My days are filled with my dog and chasing this crazy overwhelming urge to get my message out there. 

All things considered, life is terrific. I have every reason to be grateful honestly. I made a hard choice to leave an impossible relationship, to open new doors. I'm literally about to leave a well paying position, to chase a dream. And I’ll be leaving my downtown high-rise apartment to live in a shed in a month to again, chase a dream.

I have a pot to piss in though. Things are crummy to say the least, but god damn am I in a good position. 

The point is, as I find my way and navigate through life, it doesn't feel like enough. 

Am I making the right choices? Am I being rash? Naïve? I have every reason to be a victim here, to be sad and depressed and empty, and some days I certainly feel like that. But holy fucking shit, I have a life. I have something to believe in.

So YOU have it all or nothing? Does emptiness creep up on you in the wee hours of the night? No money for the bills? Cant enjoy the finer things in life? Mom just died? Dad just died?

Do yourself this favor, and this will be my only ask, YOU don't need to be hard on yourself. 

Navigating life and getting older has been tricky. Ill always have unreasonable expectations for myself but if you find yourself reading this in you're darkest hour or you're best beach day.

Hold on.

Hold on to making life better and easier, even in the worst times. Hold on to embracing you’re unreasonable expectations and let you're guard down. 

Just live. 

If you just live a little, you’ll see things start happening for you, and not to YOU.

Take it easy. 

[antcassese]

That time you made a hard choice, that was for the better, but didn't feel like it at the time.

Life is always so full of choices.… Isnt it? Isn't that whats so great about the world we live in? Where we can make choices for ourselves? 

Like seriously, what a wonderful thing that is. That freedom, no matter the circumstance, the ball is ALWAYS in our court. We call the shots, we suffer the consequences, we reap the benefits. You have to digest just how powerful that really is.

Its like a game of chess if you really think about it. But again, the choices you make will determine the entire game. Just imagine you’re life being chess, this choice will give X outcome, that choice will give X outcome. 

That's what life is all about, having the power to decide. Each and every little tiny aspect of you're life. 

You're clothes are dirty, you gonna clean em’? or maybe wait for the washer to come grab them for you're lazy ass?

My job sucks. Well shit, you staying or going? 

You feel totally empty about every aspect of you're sad pathetic life? Do you plan on continuing to live empty or do you plan on making some hard choices, the hardest of you're entire fucking life, to feel so full again?

Life a breeze but everyday you have to fight some inner demon that doesn't need to be there? You gonna live like that demon doesn't exist, or you gonna confront that shit and put it to bed?

As I get older, I realize just how powerful it is to have the ability to chose. With that comes some beautiful outcomes, but also some awful outcomes.. 

I find happiness in the farthest part of the world right where no one ever has. Understanding the difficult choices in life are difficult for a reason. How beautiful is that? Finding joy in a time of angst and uncertainty, so many questions, so little answers.

There is solace in finding that happiness in the up most bitter times.

So you’ve made a difficult choice that absolutely broke you as a person at the time. The hardest choice you’ve ever been faced with.It kept you awake at night, made you sick and feel disgusting, even ruined you're quality of life..A choice so difficult that this no longer felt like a game of chess, but felt like “Holy fuck, this is it. This is real, this is my life. Whats it gonna be?

What was the question you asked yourself after making that impossible choice in you're life?

I bet it was “Was that the right choice?”

If you're gut says yes, but you're intentions tell a different story. I swear you better trust your gut. That's why it feels so hard because it most certainly is the right choice, but sometimes doesn't feel like it.

You see, life is all a choice. But never make the cardinal mistake of doubting you're choices. They are yours, they are in you're DNA, forever. 

Make them count, and stick to you're guns.

[antcassese]

We owe ourselves

No one owes you a fucking thing. You know why? The same reason you think you owe other people something.

You don't owe money, you don't owe respect. You certainly don't have it owed to you. I remember as a kid hearing the old adage, “you think you got it coming”. Now, I'm not entirely sure whos voice I remember that coming from, but it always struck a nerve with me. Even more so getting older and things no longer had that same innocence to them as when I was a child. 

Which lead me to a lot of confusion, and questions about the world. Why are people mean, why are they confused, why are they poor. Just why. 

Coming from the millennial generation, there's seems to be this narrative that our generation thinks something is OWED to them. In part, I think there lies some truth to that but not entirely.

I think we have higher standers for life, a responsibility in changing the world, in ways no one could imagine. How deep is that? An entire generation feels responsible...for...changing the world. Say it in you're head, digest it, and feel it.

Worst part>? It gives the impression we are entitled, and therefore project our entitlements onto others. 

The truth>? We know we don't owe anyone, I certainly don't owe anyone, a god damn thing. I'm also under the same pretense of not being owed a single thing. 

Try carrying the burden of changing the world on you're shoulders everyday. 

Does that explain the desire to be accepted, does it explain the lack of certainty in work, the confusion of relationships. We want the world to go our way so badly that we end up totally idle in life. How fucked up is that? Were trying to find our way, only to get more and more lost.

Could you imagine going everyday driving except it feels like the E-break is on? 

Running towards a door that only gets further? 

The really cool part to all of this, when we find our way. When we find the light. We go to school, make an impact, volunteer, inspire others. Change the world. 

We don't have anything coming, as a generation, but more importantly, I don't have anything coming. The world will not and has not ever come to me. I got to, we got to go out and get the world and put it in our fucking hands! 

I owe that to myself, and I feel I owe that to you. To change you're world.

My dues are paid. Enjoy

[antcassese]

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[antcassese]

Being doubtful isn't so bad

Lately, I've been having a lot of doubts. Okay, let me back up. The past few years, all I’ve been doing is doubting myself. 

Now the hardest part for me is internally, I am an a certain guy. I am certain of my thoughts and emotions, I have clear images of what my days should be filled with, and certainly don't doubt any of it. BUT, yes, the big but within.

I'm someone who is strong willed, motivated, and almost unstoppable when it comes to everyday life. I still manage to doubt things. Why is this? Probably because I'm a fucking human. Just like you!

The past year or two has amplified on a number of levels in the lack of confidence and doubting myself sector. Due in part to the pressures of everyday living, maintaining a career, a relationship (that has just recently failed) and never being satisfied with where my life is.

I drive myself crazy, not able to sleep at night, newly diagnosed anxiety that has created health problems, yes health problems from anxiety. I have no doubts about my inability to relax because I have always maintained these unrealistic, out of this world, unreasonable expectations for myself.

I wonder if doubting myself is a bad thing? Well shit, of course its bad! But is it really?

Unable to ever live in the moment, at least in recent years, doubting myself has showed me some underlying wins. 

1. It means I fucking care about my life and all that it is!

2. I lost touch with myself, and its time to take back over

3. It could always be worse, I’m still self aware of this hiccup 

So many takeaways. Take this away for me. If you have you're doubts about you're life and ANY aspect of it and it makes you sick physically sometimes, you're not in such a bad place. There is a silver lining. All you have to do is work against the grain and pick apart what this problem may be and instead of letting it take over you mentally, YOU take over the problem.

Its you're life after all. 

[antcassese]

AlwaysBhustling

“I love people, and the hustle.” -Gary Vee

I started this Tumbler and had to wonder, what do I want out of it? Is it money? Is it fame? Is it a career? Is it understanding & growth? Is it to leave a legacy?

Truth be told, it’s a little bit of everything, but the legacy part, that is the bread and butter, that is the only reason I do what I do, because I will deteriorate one day, and if I leave anything behind, it’ll be my legacy.

It is imperative to be passionate about the things we do in life. Or they will fucking tank.

Im a 22 year old, occasionally lost in translation but always focused on my “larger then life” mindset. And that is crucial in this game.

I struggle everyday, wondering what I need out of life. What makes me come alive? Is it the fact that I can’t sleep at night because I’m overwhelmed with possibilities?

Growing up poor, I aspired to be rich, but fuck, who doesn’t? But being rich doesn’t necessarily mean having money.

I did fucking god awful in school and made poor choices at a young age, that have prevented me from going directions in my life that I was set on.

I re-evaluated my goals and came up with a plan, two plans, eighty plans. I have a fucking mass plan implemented as fail safes every god damn direction possible, so I will never fail as long as I stick to my believes and work my fucking ass off.

Do you know why I’m programmed like this? Because failure just isn’t a choice in this hustle.

The goal is to reach my fans, let them know what I think, what goes through my mind. And leave an everlasting impression.

Keep in mind, 10% motivation - 90% heart. The world is yours.

How’s that for an introduction? Thank me later.

“Don’t wait for an opportunity, make the opportunity, always be hustling.” - Anthony Cassese

[antcassese]

Even Gary Vee can't keep up.

Anthony Cassese