delusionist

[anxious-trashcan]

i’ve been thinking nothing but “Bad things happen in Philadelphia”. that is the exact reason we are here.

[remanence-of-love]

[catholichell]

Visit Original Link

the best 12 seconds of the show lost in the transition from the workshop to broadway (from one last ride, precursor to one last time)

[shmegmilton]

Every time I think about how Aaron Burr met Mary Shelley & Lafayette met Edgar Allan Poe, I lose my mind.

I know they all lived in the same time period, but I somehow feel like they exist in completely different universes from each other or something.

[anxietyproblem]

[athoughtfox]

so does anyone else ever think about the level of post-war wizarding celebrity the Weasley-Potters would have had? like

this is an entire family of war heroes that also contains the chosen one, two heads of Ministry departments, the Minister for Magic herself, a professional Quidditch player and later editor at the Prophet, an extremely successful wizard entrepreneur, an international curse-breaker, an ex-Triwizard champion, and an eminent dragonologist and they definitely all hold an Order of Merlin of one class or another

you can’t tell me they weren’t featured in wizarding papers and magazines every damn week they try to avoid it but it’s no use 

trying to go to Quidditch matches or anywhere really as a family is a tricky business because of the paparazzi

eating Chocolate Frogs is a weird experience for all their kids because their family are on so many cards like ‘oh look i got Uncle Charlie again’ ‘here’s Aunt Ginny, I’m still missing Mum though’ 

Bill keeps being given Witch Weekly’s most charming smile award he’s won it like 9 times even with all his scars. one time Ron won it instead and he teased Bill about it for ages

a good portion of the people who rock up to George’s shop come not just for joke items but also to shake his hand (and later Ron’s) and pay tribute to the portrait of Fred that hangs in there 

there’s a Hermione interview in the Prophet at least twice a week. if anything vaguely significant happens ever in wizarding politics everyone wants a comment from Hermione, even if it has nothing to do with her

George loves making up wild rumours about his family members and ‘leaking’ them to the press, like when he told them Percy and Fleur were having a passionate affair (this one backfired a bit because it was shortly before Percy’s actual divorce. the public excitement and interest was nothing compared to what happened later when it got out that Percy was seeing Oliver Wood, and then there was another professional Quidditch player in the family and it just got worse)  

Harry finds it weirdly comforting that the wizarding world is now obsessed not just with him, but his extended family too - they all get it now

all the kids get hounded towards the end of the year because everyone at Hogwarts want to be invited to the Burrow (very heavily warded and impenetrable to the press) for the summer to witness the annual Weasley-Potter family Quidditch match, which is legendary  

if there’s no new gossip the magazines just put in stuff like ‘recipes from the Burrow! Molly Weasley’s favourite dishes! how to feed a family of heroes!’’ or ‘losing track? here’s the Ultimate Guide to the Weasley-Potter family!’

it’s ridiculous 

[theforcekeepers]

DO NOT DO THIS.

This makes me so angry.

If you work in a movie theater and you do this I have no respect for you.

My younger brother is Type 1 Diabetic.

When we go to a movie theater, we always get him diet soda. If he were to get regular when we asked for diet, we would not give him the insulin he would need for it. If that happens, his blood sugar level could go so high he could go into a coma, go blind, or even die.

If somebody gave him regular soda instead of diet without telling us, that person could be responsible for a nine-year-old being killed or blinded.

Just thinking about that makes me so angry. I get scared every time we take him to a movie in case the people working there saw this picture and decide to do the same thing.

Please signal boost this so people know.

[wreckedupbarnes]

This also applies to baristas

[kimchicutie-deactivated20180618]

Fun story about the baristas doing this kind of shit. 

I am very sensitive to lactose, not Lactose intolerant but because of stomach ulcers that are still healing. A couple years ago I went to Starbucks right after my classes with some friends and asked for a green tea latte with soy milk. The barista, for some reason out of malice and/or hate for her life so she took it out on me, gave me whole milk in my latte.

5 minutes after my first sip of latte, my stomach cramped BAD. Not the “Oh! time to poop!” kind of cramp but it felt like someone had stabbed me with a knife and twisted it. Now I’ve had this happen before so I knew the cause of it. I went up to the barista clutching my gut screaming at her that she put dairy in my latte rather than soy LIKE I REQUESTED. She denied it and called me a “pretentious white girl for wanting soy”and so my friends got the manager. I had to explain that I had stomach ulcers that were still healing and if I were to go to the hospital for this incident, they would be responsible for it.

Manager flipped his shit and the barista was terrified out of her mind. Pretty sure both thought i was gonna sue. Manager actually fired her on the spot because of the negligence. My friends managed to get me home in one piece while I stayed home for 3 days in absolute agony and missed my midterm.

So remember kiddies, if someone is asking for Diet or “Skinny” or “soy” or anything that is not regular, give them what they requested because it may not be them being healthy, but a dietary need that can possibly be life or death

[housebuiltbyghosts-deactivated2]

also if they ARE trying to be healthy you should give it to them to!! Its not your decision to police or question others food choices!!! 

also im lactose intolerant AND ive had stomach infections/ulcers so i feel this. 

[cartoonkatelyn]

I have Celiac Disease, so I’m very gluten intolerant. When I go out to eat at restaurants a lot of people just assume that I asked for my food gluten free because of the gluten free diet fad (which is usually a bullshit diet btw). 

Last month I went out to dinner with a friend at an italian restaurant that had a small gluten free menu. I had been there once before and had their gluten free pasta and it was great! I think one of the managers had been there and was super helpful when taking my order to make sure that everything was gluten free for me. When I ordered the gluten free pasta again this time though, the waitress who took my order all but rolled her eyes at me. I didn’t think much of it at the time, because the restaurant was so accommodating before, I just assumed it would be the same this time.

But sure enough, they brought out my pasta, I ate it, and about an hour later I had extreme stomach pains and was throwing up (in a movie theater no less).

Barfing and agonizing pain aside, eating gluten when you have celiac causes a lot of internal damage that’s hard to notice. The biggest thing is that it damages your intestines, preventing your body from absorbing nutrients properly, which can take months to heal.

So PLEASE, if you work at a restaurant or anything with food and someone asks for something a certain way, please listen to them and don’t just disregard someone’s order. It’s not funny and it can have serious consequences.

[somethingnottooclever]

I will reblog this with every single story about someone getting sick because of an asshole giving them the opposite of what they ordered until it sinks in for everyone.

[sailornightfury]

Recently on the news a 16 year old boy with a dairy allergy had gone to eat at IHOP with his family. The specifically asked if they could make dairy free pancakes and they said yes. Not too long after he had a reaction and was rushed to the hospital. This kid died because the was dairy in his pancakes that they asked for no dairy. His epi pen that his mother had wasn’t enough to help him. I know working in fast food or any job that’s serves food and beverage sucks but not as much as causing someone to get sick over negligence.

[obstinate-nocturna]

My youngest cousin – who is now five, he just started kindergarten – has Celiac’s disease. You would not BELEIVE the amount of times I’ve heard my aunt say she’s ordered something gluten free, only to watch the waiter or waitress’s eyes go huge when she gives it to my cousin – my cousin with the medical id band on his tiny five year old wrist proclaiming I HAVE CELIACS and have to take it back. Shit like this could kill my cousin. Knock it the fuck off.

[iopele]

I cannot tolerate caffeine–it makes me have chest pain and a racing pulse, and also gives me horrible body pain, so I always ask for decaf if I order coffee when I’m out, and doublecheck with the waiter/ress when they bring it. but instead of saying “is this decaf like I asked for?” I always say “oh, did I remember to order decaf?” I shouldn’t have to act like I’m the forgetful one (because I know damn well I asked for decaf) but it seems to work better than implying that they screwed up when I take the blame on myself like that. and if there’s any hesitation when they answer, I tell them, “if there’s any doubt, please get another one, or just give me water–if this is regular, it’ll mess up my heart” and lots of times when I say that, they look alarmed and go change it or get another one. 

but I shouldn’t HAVE to share my personal medical history with strangers just to get my order right! no one should! how is it their business? it makes me really uncomfortable to have to do that. JUST GIVE PEOPLE WHAT THEY ORDER!

[minnigem]

I’ve reblogged this maaaany times before but there’s a few new stories on here so i’m doing it again.

cut this shit out

[willowfae82]

don’t be that kind of asshole.

[anxietyproblem]

[theartofangirling]

I’ve been waiting a year to post this

[tae-rhr]

i love this couple so much //

[memedocumentation]

The memes of 2017

(N.B. The months below offer only a loose means to put the memes in rough chronological order. Some memes may have started earlier, but Meme Documentation just aims to give a rough outline as to when the memes became popular.)

January

Hollywood sign meme

Bernie Sanders giant tweet meme

brother, may I have some oats

Salt Bae meme

Bye Bye Man meme

i lik the bred meme

Meitu meme

cash me outside how bow dah

punching Nazis meme

yaint meme

February

Roll Safe meme

confetti meme

blinking white guy meme

cope meme

Oscars meme

wot in tarnation meme

whomst meme

expanding brain meme

whoppy machine broke

pix2pix meme

“Shooting Stars” meme

March

this is the future that liberals want

student athlete meme

how Italians X meme

Meryl Streep yelling meme

playing from another room meme

come see the ocean meme

mess with X-o you get Y-o

April

horse friend meme

cuck comic meme

Spotify playlist meme

I’m weird meme

bone hurting juice meme

John C. Miller meme

thrussy meme

online millennial meme

he protec but he also attac meme

May

ordinary people creative people meme

avocado toast meme

mocking SpongeBob meme

sleeping Shaq meme

shidding and farding meme

cracking open a cold one with the boys

Sixpenceee Heals meme

covfefe meme

Russian cat meme

June

do you take constructive criticism?

oh, worm? meme

gay Babadook meme

one thicc bih meme

the floor is lava meme

“Fireflies” meme

all women are queens meme

this post can be reblogged by anyone

buenos dias Mandy meme

not you meme

Woody Collective

classic gaming emotion meme

how to talk to short people meme

boneless meme

do not interact meme

pee your pants meme

July

Aaron Paul screaming meme

nothing but respect for MY president

Tumblr, we need to talk

dancing hot dog meme

me talking about X meme

sometimes things that are expensive are worse

powder that makes you say “yes”

Glee defense meme

swear jar meme

hewwo meme

frog in Tom Holland’s mouth meme

right in front of my salad meme

hey there demons meme

widdle toesies meme

August

are you slappin meme

understandable, have a nice day

piss jello meme

haha just kidding but that sounds like something someone on here would say doesn’t it

so… chunks, huh? meme

fancy font meme

you are already dead meme

country girls make do meme

Crash Bandicoot “whoa” meme

I don’t know X and at this point I’m too afraid to ask

Dobby pussy indulgence meme

I am a X looking for Y meme

man checking out another woman meme

Rick and Morty copypasta

none but in yellow meme

deactivate your almonds meme

all my shirts are disappearing meme

fellas, is it gay meme

X can’t come to the phone right now

September

thanks for coming to my TED talk

wake me up meme

force-feeding cat pills meme

jock–nerd/prep–goth meme

millimeters of bone meme

unnecessary footnotes meme

“Big Enough” meme

that’s pussy babe meme

slutty slutty years meme

Hotel Mario meme

inhaling seagull meme

domesticated clown meme

Elf on the Shelf meme

maid café meme

monkey haircut meme

October

eat the child meme

it’s true but he shouldn’t say it

homeboy is going to like get it meme

warn Markiplier meme

grain entrapment meme

I diagnose your with X meme

oh you haven’t heard? meme

then perish meme

November

forbidden snacks meme

types of headaches meme

horny on main meme

why are you booing me? I’m right

gay–bi–lesbian/distinguished–functional–disaster meme

triple gay meme

my bike got stolen recently meme

petting dog meme

Safari tabs meme

pretty/bitchin’ meme

women be shopping meme

karma got its kiss for me meme

the girl reading this meme

McDonald’s chat meme

December

Slothful Jeremiah meme

“Put Your Head on My Shoulder” meme

not valid NSA agent meme

elf practice meme

“I Will Survive” meme

requesting bitcoin meme

I eat bees meme

I put arsenic in the wine. And the pasta.

Americans be eating cheesed burger

Earth-chan meme

start off your new year right meme

there in the 5th row stands meme

before 2017 ends meme

Cartoon Network schedule meme

tsuchinoko real meme

shirtless Kylo Ren meme

this is a gays only event meme

the sound this image makes meme

Peasley rant meme

why would you say something so controversial yet so brave?

small but knowing clown meme

aphobe block list

[reddiemercury]

Oh my actual god.

[phasered]

i am a grown ass woman, an academic, a published researcher, a criminologist, i even pay taxes and have a lease on a comfortable but reasonably priced sedan, but the second i see the number “69″ in any context its like i’m being possessed by the spirit of every 13 year old boy worldwide simultaneously. the lizard brain frantically slams the shutdown button on my reasonable mental processes with manic glee and the word ‘nice’ is out of my mouth quicker than a wildfire during a drought 

[feministism]

[drankinwatahmelin]

4. If the car pulls up to you run in the opposite direction.

5. Walk with your keys in your hands and keep a key between each finger

6. If they put you in the trunk kick out the headlights

7. If you get lost find a woman with a child. Never ask a man for help (this one was drilled)

[bando--grand-scamyon]

That scream fire piece of advice is literally life saving

8. Watch your shadows and reflections, especially if someone is walking behind you. A split second notice is better than none and will help you.

[gaylittlepieceofsh1t]

Yes this last one really saves lives y'all I do it all the time

[uncleromeo]

girls have to learn to view the world like international intelligence agents just to be safe walking down the street. smh.

[twilightt-fantasy]

guys pls pls pls reblog and girls pls pls pls be safe out there. terrifying and so sad that we have to worry about this on a daily basis

[guiltyidealist]

(I’m an enby, but, frankly, this is helpful for anyone.)

[cryptidinks]

- always tell someone where youre at and an approx time when youll be back

[witcheshaven]

Add text replacement words in your phone if possible. Something short and memorable that you can send quickly to people in moments of emergencies.

E.g.

[whatchagonnadoabooouuutttit]

I f ing hate that we need to reblog this, people suck, but this will save lives.

DO NOT SCROLL PAST

[anonymousmothman]

Being female fucking sucks but yes this shit is important for everyone

[lets-throw-bacchanal]

All the cute nicknames Victor Frankenstein called his son throughout the book:

catastrophe 

miserable monster

demoniacal corpse to which I have so miserably given life

an ugly mummy

a thing such as even Dante could not have conceived,

the filthy daemon to whom I have given life

no human

the wretch whom I had created

sight tremendous and abhorred

unearthly ugly being

too horrible for human eyes

miserable head

vile insect

abhorred monster

wretched devil

you, whose joint wickedness might desolate the world

too horrible for human eyes to behold

the filthy mass that moved and talked

wretch whom I dreaded

villain

monster of my creation

fiend

figure most hideous and abhorred

+ bonus - all the cute ways captain Robert Walton described Victor’s son on 1 page:

a form which I cannot find words to describe

never did I behold a vision so horrible as his face, of such loathsome, yet appalling hideousness

tremendous being

scary and unearthly in his ugliness

Tag yourself I’m “the filthy mass that moved and talked” 

[general-george-washington]

Can't believe James Madison reproduced asexually and gave birth to the constitution today

[andromedaa-tonks]

he’s SO babie