Alien Boy

!! CW !! DRUG ADDICTION, ANOREXIA / ARFID, AND SELF HARM AND MORE and some bad descriptions of vomiting in the near past!! CW !! I'm 24 and a self certified RamblerTM and the best worst example u'll come across all day. Welcome to my nonsensical blog. It's a drain straight from my brain into the world. Stay and enjoy what all that shit did to me.. U don't want to end up like this. RIP Steve Albini.

[anxiousleech]

RIP Steve Albini

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ok. that instant pasta sauce paste thing is shit.

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oh god. buzzing in my kitchen. putting on shoes and then i'm gonna hint for ghe wasp again. why can't it judt fly away to its home and go to sleep.

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maybe that wasp came from the buildings hallway..... that'd explain whe it was so exhausted already.. bc there def isn't anything to eat there and nowhere to hide either.. i guess in my flower pot the wasp could eat some old leafes or smthng.. just fr pls don't let it come inside again. bc it'd 100% get stuck w/ its feet in my rugs.

[anxiousleech]

ok yeah no. wasp escaped. glass empty. fuck. window still open. hope she flew away or is hiding in the dirt.. and didn't come inside again :(((( scared of being stung in my sleep...

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somehow a flightless wasp made it into my no window middle of my flat bathroom. only saw it coincidentally when i opened the door to go get some lip balm............ when i came back w/ a glass and paper the wasp had already crawled BENEATH one of my shower matts omfg.. if i hadn't seen it the first time.. would have washed my face this night and prob stepped on it. like i did w/ the last wasp that was in my flat........... got her outside but it fr seems like it can't fly anymore, seems pretty exhausted too....... maybe overheated or smthng, has to have been in here for h already.... bc i want to snack on my windowsill i put the glas over her again, outside tho in one of my dead flower pots.. will open it 2morrow morning maybe the light will make her fly away. kinda want to feed her but i also dwt the wasp to remember finding anything edible here or she'll bring her friends next time................ fr thank god i saw her when i did....

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when it comes to the topic of "ppl filming themselves / filming the .. at a concert r annoying" there is ALWAYS some1 saying "yeah i agree, a few clips and pictures should be enough". i hate those ppl and dissagree. no1 needs those photos. why not wait for official media photos to get published or a live album or even an official live video album. and yes setting up a camera somewhere or bootlegging r smthng very very different. and if the concert is too inofficial or too small to get journalists.being there maybe that is a sign to either be the journalist urself anf behave accordingly. or to maybeeeee preserve the magic and not document it in shitty videos and especially shitty video w/ ur own face in it.

[anxiousleech]

i hate so how so many of the pseudo leftist young ppl fall for chinas propaganda. a country fr doing colonialism. taking resources as environmentally bad as they can in africa and building absolutely horrible quality infrastructure around the world, indebting poor nations in the process. killing their ppl bc those buildings, bridges, roads will crumble even w/o disaster. who of the popular new left talks abt that? no1.

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why is frozen pizza the only high quality preprepared food u can get. why don't they make luxury pasta sauces or smthng.

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gonna get one of this miniature vaccums i have lived in crumbly filth for too long.

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i've never seen good looking colored contact lenses. i HATE when actors in movies wear them, looks awful 100% of the time. i also do NOT think that they look good on korean/japanese idols at all.... they just look like lrinted plastic bc that is what they r. and when they r bigger than the natural iris it's even worse...

[anxiousleech]

i really really really need to clean the inside of my window frames again. i hate doing that. it's white fucking plastic. didn't even kno they made plastc window frames till i moved here. it's really shitty plastic too. been thinking i should get new gummy sealing too.... can prob buy it at the hardware store ny the m or smthng. maybe then they'll get dirty inside the frame slower than now... hope i have enough q tips.

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oh god wtf do they fucking sing in this audio book. sounds horrible. in general audiobook naration ofc is often times incredibly questionably as if every next word is a surprise to the narrator... but that pseudo singing.. nah. why.

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back in the recent past u could order books online and collect and pay for them in the store. tho i always ordered them in the store itself..... bc i was too dumb to understand the internet b4 2020. fun times. i still remember when i tried to get my hands on the first drrr!!! light novel and they ordered the japanese version lol. didn't buy it. the store ppl were really confused. their own fault tho.

[anxiousleech]

still considering getting pumpkin seed butter tho it is fucking expensive, more epxensive than cashew butter. which is kinda weird isn't it. bc pumpkin seeds r way less expensive than cashews. but it looks soooo good. deep green w/ dark violet reddish oil seperating.... also prob better for the environment than other nut butters right? maybe i could do it myself w/ my mixer but idk if it'd be strong enough........ it's 12€ for 500g. maybe it'd be worth it. bc i'd prob need a few years to use it up anyways. also i've been thinking, why don't they blend up sunflower seeds? bc of the seed oil conspiracy going on? really would have hope that it'd stay w/ the dumb right wing ppl and wouldn't infect the orthorexics but u kno........ u all remember when i predicted it'd be the next big thing back in early 2022? ofc was already very popular by then but not like it's now. but yeah that pumpkin seed butter.......... i want it. i'm gonna buy it. maybe i'll make it to be like a goal for me. one week of sane grocery behaviour and i'll get it or smthng. been thinking also i should stick to my principles and go cash only...

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need to fold so much clothing......

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excited for my awful instant sauce thingy pasta. those sauce powders fr r awful so i got a pasty concentrate instead this time, was on sale yes. brand name yes. imo.. when it comes to unhealthy food brand name is best 99% of the time.