Recovery

Jules, recovering twenty-something in progress. INFP. In recovery from anorexia nervosa; originally diagnosed at age 14, and depression. I'm trying to move on and find peace. Currently getting my Master's Degree. I also post about my two cats, t

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Life is so very sweet and full of surprises.

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Detroit Free Press, Michigan, January 11, 1960

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Hello hi! Your blog appeared on my "recommended blogs" listing and the pretty purple color caught my attention. So anyway, just wanted to say that you seem like a nice person, I hope school goes well for you and I wish the best for you in all your professional, educational, personal endeavors! Ok thanks bye!

Thank you!  Wishing you all the best as well!!

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Dude that is so inspiring. I'm so happy that you're doing well; you absolutely deserve it. Hold onto it. Don't let it go. This happiness is yours.

Thank you!

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Obviously, I’m not on here much anymore but I just wanted to stop by and say something that I have come to know.

My life right now is my eating disorder’s worst case scenario.  My weight is well above my medically established goal weight.  But the wild thing is that literally every other thing in my life is absolutely best case scenario.  I have a partner who I adore and who adores me.  I finished graduate school.  I have the career that I have dreamed about since I was 14.  I am feel excited and grateful to go to work every day.  I have wonderful cats and wonderful friends.  I talk to my family frequently on the phone.  This is the dream, which must coexist with my eating disorder’s nightmare, and I have to say that it feels amazing.

Wishing you love and peace.

XO Jules

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When do you graduate? :)

May of 2019 (knock on wood, haha).  I am super excited about the work I’ll be doing this year!

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something said to me that I will never forget

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Wow, your hair is amazing!!!!

Thank you so much!  I got a groupon and treated myself to my first haircut in a year and a half and I also got balayage for the first time ever!  I’m thrilled but it’s never gonna look this good after I style it lol.

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The rug just got pulled out from under me. I feel so hurt and blindsided but I feel confident that I will be able to get through this without using symptoms.

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I’m so proud of you for working to recover. You’re a very strong, wonderful person and I think it’s so brave. Have a lovely day 💖

Thank you for the lovely message!  I hope you’re having a great day!

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thank you so much for the response re: psych NPs! And to @tryingtolive-livingtotry for more input! I think I may more seriously consider this route, especially because I'm more interested in med management than therapy anyways. I think i'm mostly looking to fulfill the role of a psychiatrist without going to med school lol

That’s awesome!  Glad to hear it :)

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Sorry if this is too much of a personal question but I was wondering if you have POTS and what has worked for you to manage it? xx

Hi there!  So, my diagnosis is a bit different from POTS but some of the same things apply.  I have tachycardia that is present in all contexts and short PR interval (LGL syndrome was the most recent dx) but I also have low bp and my symptoms do increase with postural changes.  I take a beta blocker daily, which has been amazing for getting my tachycardia under control and coincidentally helps with anxiety.  Unfortunately, it also lowers blood pressure, so we need to balance the dose carefully.  I have been instructed to drink a lot of water and to consume much more salt than the average person.  That helps boost the volume of blood in the body, which supports blood pressure.  I have been told to avoid events that involve being outside in the heat, which I sometimes ignore because I gotta live my life, ya know?  I just make sure that I will have somewhere to sit down and I hydrate.  I don’t work out outside when it’s hot.  Eating smaller meals more frequently helps me avoid postprandial hypotension.  Self-awareness has been important for me.  I can typically feel when my heart rate is too high and my bp is dropping.  This typically allows me to sit down before I pass out completely.  That being said, I still end up passing out somewhere public once a year.  I tell my close friends that if I’m going down, they should help lower me to the ground rather than trying to hold me upright.  I tell them that I do not need anyone to call for medical help when I pass out unless I hit my head on the way down or don’t become conscious quickly.  I also avoid caffeine, which is not as terrible as it sounds.  My doctors suggested doing this type of training where you stand up for increasingly long periods of time every day but we ended up not doing that since I was already standing all day for work.  Knowing triggers like extended periods of standing, going rapidly from sitting to standing, caffeine, dehydration, hangovers, heat, etc. can be super helpful.  Your doctor may be able to help you identify your triggers.

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So full of gratitude that I could cry

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