I'm Not Tyler

I'M NOT TYLER | I no longer make content for this community, nor do I participate in this community. This is for reblogs only.

[rebels-scum]

Can ya’ll believe @setheverman and @markiplier are in the same show wow great collab

[ridgewayearl]

IT MAKES ME WONDER WHAT SHOW IT IS

[rebels-scum]

@ridgewayearl it’s called Emara! Here’s a link to the first episode on youtube: https://youtu.be/3ytnzJjEyAM

[rebels-scum]

Can ya’ll believe @setheverman and @markiplier are in the same show wow great collab

[feministism]

[cwote]

[apocalypto-12]

Thank you, i wish you the best man, hope that the years to come will be filled of awesome and beautiful things cus you deserve it! Thanks for the PMA and may you get delivered lots of free cool shit

Thank you for spreading the love and positive attitude!! Keep it up! ♡

[apocalypto-12]

This has been sitting my inbox for awhile now. I refrained from answering it for a lot of reasons. There's a few hundred asks sitting in my box along similar lines. For those of you who remember, or have kept up, I stopped being active on this blog about a year ago for a multitude of reasons. I had to block a lot of people for my own health. I cleaned out this blog so that it only has my original posts--really silly and poorly made memes and shit posting, along with some positivity edits, which are the reason I made this blog in the first place so that I didn't have to junk up my main. I stated I was leaving the fandom. I said I wouldn't run the blog anymore. A few months after cleaning it out I decided I wanted to run it as a general positivity blog, then I scraped that idea, but started it again recently, because somethings have been bothering me. It's been nearly two years and yeah, I'm still a little pissed. I'm not over it. I'm going through a depressive episode again, recently, and it's made me upset about everything, everyone, the circumstances that got me here. So I wanna talk. I started watching Markiplier when I was about sixteen, I was a sophomore in highschool, and fnaf had just come out. My friends and I would have sleepovers and we'd crowd in the bed and watch Mark play octodad and laugh. It was great, because I enjoyed Mark's content! This was a new platform to me, really, because up to this point if only watched a few youtubers vlog, and never religiously, and never gamers. Immediately I looked to see if there was a fandom. I made the executive decision pretty quickly not to jump in and participate for a number of what must be obvious reasons, instead electing to watch Mark and enjoy content to myself from his selected platform. Fast forward to 2016. I'm 18, I've had my first awful, terrible breakdown that fucked up my life irreparably. I'm trying desperately not to kill myself, trying desperately every night to recover and stop whatever is going on in my brain. The summer of 2016, I graduate highschool. I get ready for work everyday and I watch Mark play videogames. I laugh for what feels like the first time in forever. I start making shitty little positivity edits with Mark's face on them, all pastel colors and cringey pop song quotes, because it's something to do and it makes me feel better. I don't want to post them to my main blog, so I create this account in the late summer of 2016. I'm recovering. Due to the url (for the love of God please someone get Tyler to take this from me) this blog got popular quickly for someone who makes shit posts and not particularly funny memes. It's great! People come talk to me about their problems, about fandom problems, and we console each other until 2 am some nights. People send me their content and ask me to reblog it, and I do. I state my opinions about things (which are still on my blog with the original tags. That's not what this post is about.) And people took it out of context. Hate mail really is one thing. It's not pleasant, especially when you're trying to learn to be kind. Death threats are another. Not only that, but asking followers to send you death threats, watching the people you thought were friends turn and take a side of a war you didn't realize you had a place in, a war you didn't realize had to exist, is no fun. Watching friends say "This is too much for me to handle" when you're the one getting death threats and they're sitting on the sidelines is worse. This wasn't a recovery for me anymore. It was a stressor. The ironic thing is, no one ever came to talk to me. Ironic still, never did I "call anyone out" or mention anyone by name--but that's not what this post is about. I've watched these same people tell 12 year olds to kill themselves over shipping opinions, when they themselves were 21. This post isn't about them, either. The worse part of this was losing a coping mechanism. I'd get home and try to fight off bad episodes and watch Mark, but I'd only get annoyed and upset. I can't watch Ethan. I can't read Tyler's tweets anymore. I can't watch Jack. I had to unfollow everyone, because even seeing their content was making me ill--when before, it was making me better. I can't enjoy this fandom every again because of the way it operates. This post is about me, a year later, not being able to believe how some people can log on everyday into a community whose creators are so intrinsically about positivity, and turn around and create a war with people who are essentially children and teens over trivial things that don't matter, ever. How you can spread negativity until it festers and infects your space. Until you make your content creators sick. This is a post about positivity. I'm not asking anymore. I'm begging you to be kind to others. To go out of you way with your kindness. To log on everyday and send positive mail to ten strangers, ESPECIALLY those that send the hate because they need kindness the most. I'm asking you to turn the other cheek. I'm asking you to stand up for those being bullied NOT by attacking the bully, but by supporting the victim. By not leaving friends. By being kind to everyone, because it makes a difference. I've got new coping mechanisms now, not as good, but okay. If I'd been in a weaker spot a year ago--and thank God at the time I had a system in place and a community that loved me, and I was happy for a moment--I would've killed myself. People would've been responsible for it, which I'm not sure all of you send death threats understand. Be kind. Don't be afraid to apologize. Remember people make mistakes and change. I'm begging this community to fix itself and change. Challenge yourself and others--send ten nice messages!! Tell your friends you love them!! Tag people you follow in nice memes, don't be shy!! Just be kind!!

[sunflorally]

allow yourself to be loved. by friends, by family, by significant others, by everything, by yourself. you deserve to be cherished and appreciated by people that want you in their lives. don’t let the fear of what could happen stop you from embracing the love being offered to you.

[cwote]

You are wanted. You are loved. You are needed.

Inspired by the wonderful @sheisrecovering

[loveyourselfsuggestion]

Show the kindness to others that you wish they would show you

[daminwayne]

drink water!!!! dance in your room!!!!!! eat a lot of veggies!!!!!! dance as you do chores!!!!!! eat some fruit!!!!!!!! let yourself feel sad!!!!! have that $5 hot drink sometimes!!!!! try to smile even when you’re alone and doing some work!!!! listen to music that makes you happy when you’re feeling down!!!!!! we’ve all gone through crap and life might have more in store for us but we got this!!!!! 

[loveyourselfsuggestion]

The times that you feel you need kindness and love more than anything is the time to show them to other: sometimes the seeds you plant don’t always come back at harvest, but it’s better to have tried than let yourself starve.

[apocalypto-12]

Spreading some real positivity! I really hope you have a wonderful day my friend. Sending a virtual hug, to show that I love and support you :)

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡ Sending the love right back!

[feelthefearanddoitanyway-x-deac]

do you know what? you’re pretty awesome. think about everything you do everyday. you don’t even know, do you? you breathe, you exist, you think… that’s quite a lot without everything else. and you probably think so much. so cut yourself some slack once in a while. if you have an off day or an off week, you’re still existing to live another day. you’re still carrying on.

[anancientheart]

Be sad but get up. You don’t have to shower. You can put on the same clothes you wore yesterday. Nobody will care. The sky is blue, wildflowers are blooming by the side of the road. Strangers have stories to tell. Go for a walk, go for a drive, go to a greenhouse, a bookstore, a movie theater. You can stay in bed but nothing is going to happen there. Sometimes you’ve really just got to get the fuck up.

[loveyousuggestions]

you always manage to make me smile, even when i don’t think i can

[apocalypto-12]

Can someone call Tyler and get him to take this url for Pete's sake I'm tired of ya'll sending me your drama Like I Asked

[apocalypto-12]