Storytelling

 Author, Writer, Dreamer, Reader

[apricia]

Masterlist // For ever by your side // Aemond Targaryen x reader

Prolog - Alyssa Targaryen, Second of her name

Chapter 1 - In need of a dragon 

Chapter 2 - About bastards and whores

Chapter 3 - Words cut deeper than knifes

Chapter 4 - Parent’s concerns

Chapter 5 - New Friends, old Desires

Chapter 6 - The Matters of Driftmark

Chapter 7 - Reunion with old friends

Chapter 8 - A queen‘s punishment, a mother‘s love

Chapter 9 - Old habits

Chapter 10 - Loose tongues, empty promises

Chapter 11 - Announced engagements and heated tempers 

Chapter 12 - Apologies and open hearts

Chapter 13 - Dangerous Amends

[apricia]

For ever by your side / Aemond Targaryen x reader // Part XIII

Chapter 13 - Dangerous Amends

"By the gods, I can't believe I agreed to this madness."

Alyssa gave him a look over her shoulder. "Neither do I, to be honest. I really thought you'd refuse as soon as I tell you what I'm up to."

The way to the dragonpit was easy to find, even though it was already dark outside and they had to sneak out of the keep.

Aemond glared at her angrily. "I should have done that. Can't you think of anything else I can do to apologize?"

"No, not really. Did you think that a bouquet of flowers or a tin of lemon cake would settle the matter? You don't know me well then."Two dragonkeepers patrolled the entrance and Alyssa stopped to check the distance between them and the door. She had to get to Vermithor. Vhagar wasn't in the dragon pit, she was just too big for that. But she rested not far from here.

"I hoped so, yes, but I didn't believe it. I just didn't expect you to expect me to fly to the Stepstones with you."

Alyssa turned to Aemond. He seemed nervous. They both wore black riding clothes and cloaks so they could walk the streets of King's Landing undetected. Alyssa was armed with two short swords and several knives, while a sword slung from Aemond's waist.

"Are you scared?"

His head snapped around to her and he narrowed his eye. "It has nothing to do with fear. It is reckless and stupid what you are planning."

"Then why are you coming with me?"

Aemond raised an eyebrow and his gaze turned reproachful. As if he wanted to blame her for giving him no other choice. Alyssa hadn't forced him into anything. She had told him that she wanted to go to the Stepstones. The decisive battles were going on and she wanted to help. Aemond had given her a wide eyed look and immediately contradicted. Only when he had realized that Alyssa would go one way or the other, he had agreed to accompany her.

"I couldn't have let you go alone," he murmured.

"Why not? Wouldn't be the first time I fly there alone. Apart from that, Vermithor is with me."

Aemond shook his head. "I can't believe you're actually doing this."

Alyssa bit back a grin. "I always thought that at some point you would get drawn into the fights there," she then admitted.

Aemond looked at her in surprise. "How come?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "You had claimed Vhagar, were practicing swordsmanship. I had believed that the fights on the Stepstones would be some kind of proof for you." It wasn't like she was flown on the Steptstones just because of the suspicion that Aemond would be a part of the fights. In fact, a small part of her had always wished that they would meet there. Two children who hadn't owned dragons and had been mocked for the matter. Became two warriors who had managed to claim the two largest living dragons and went to war with them. It had been a small, admittedly very naive, dream of Alyssa.

Aemond's face went blank. "I never felt the need to prove myself, Alyssa. Not even when I claimed Vhagar. At least not in this way."

"Then what way?"

"I only claimed Vhagar for one reason, it was the same reason I trained so hard." Aemond didn't look at her as he spoke, but he seemed lost in thought.

"Will you tell me why?" she asked softly.

His gaze slid back to her, the corners of his mouth turned up. "Maybe when we get back. If we survive this madness."

Alyssa snorted. "Don't be a spoilsport, Aemond. Nothing will happen. Just stay on Vhagar's back and fly after me."

He didn't seem the least bit convinced, but Alyssa wasn't stupid, she knew what she was doing. "We'll meet in the air. I'll just get Vermithor."

She saw Aemond shake his head. "Se ra gaomi syt jorrāelagon," he murmured when Alyssa had already started walking. She almost tripped over her own feet at his words, but just caught herself.

"If you're already acting like this, how will it be in the fight? Maybe we should stay here so you don't hurt yourself."

Alyssa glared at him angrily. It was his fault that she had stumbled, even if his words were probably not meant for her ears. "Just shut up," she hissed at him and disappeared into the dragon pit.

As she went in search of Vermithor, Aemond's words flashed through her mind. The things we do for love.

Did he really say that? Why? Out of habit? Or was he serious? His words had been so quiet that Alyssa could have misheard. That would be the most obvious explanation.

They hadn't seen each other for years and even though they were now engaged, that didn't change anything. Maybe they had loved each other as children, if you could call it that, but surely not anymore. After all, they hardly knew each other. They only knew the person they had once been. Alyssa wouldn't dare say she knew Aemond, he had changed too much for that. Just like herself. Talking about love wasn't an option. Aemond's words must have been said casually, alluding to the engagement.

"Rytsas, ñuha valītsos. Sȳz naejot ūndegon ao," Alyssa greeted Vermithor when she found him. The bronze fury lifted its head and snorted as it spotted its rider. It didn't matter to her that he was a gigantic beast that breathed fire, Vermithor would always be her boy. 

The cool night air of King's Landing slapped her face as she rose into the skies with him. "Māzigon va, valītsos, īlon jorrāelagon naejot jurnegon syt Vhagar". Not that Vhagar would be hard to find. After all, she was gigantic. And beautiful, as Alyssa realized only seconds later. Aemond was high in the sky, above the clouds.

"Finally, I thought you wouldn't come anymore."

"My beloved boy had missed me."

Aemond raised an eyebrow. "I didn't really miss you in that short time, but if you want to reward me for waiting, you're welcome to do so."

Alyssa chuckled. "I was speaking of Vermithor, Ameond."

Aemond smiled. He watched Alyssa sit on the bronze fury and gently stroke his scales. "You look like you were born on the back of a dragon."

Alyssa looked at him in astonishment. "Not born, but maybe conceived. I'd have to ask Daemon about that, he likes this kind of sick shit."

Aemond laughed and shook his head. "I don't think I want to talk to Daemon about something like that."

"Believe me, neither do I, but Dragonstone is very sensitive to hearing. You overhear far too much."

Alyssa eyed Vhagar. The female dragon was very still, gliding silently through the air, right next to Vermithor. Both dragons have known each other for decades, maybe even liked each other. At least it seemed so to Alyssa.

"She's beautiful. I never got to look at her up close."

It had been the middle of the night when Aemond had claimed her, and Alyssa had met him when he had already left Vhagar. She had only ever been able to admire the dragon from afar.

"I could never tell you how proud I was of you for claiming her," she whispered. But up here, miles from town, Aemond could hear their whispers.

"Were you? Proud of me?"

Alyssa nodded. "Very much so. Even when things went wrong afterwards and the timing wasn't right, I was beyond proud of you. I always knew that one day you would have your own dragon. And I'm mostly right. "

Aemond looked away and nodded. Still, Alyssa saw him smile. Too bad he hid that smile from her.

"What exactly are you planning to do? On the Stepstones, I mean?" Aemond grew serious. He became the warrior who wanted to prepare for a fight.

"We will only intervene in the battles on the open sea. The battles on land are too confusing and dangerous. Our ships are easy to distinguish from those of the Triarchy and are therefore easy to sink."

Aemond shook his head again. "I'm not sure whether to admire your bravery or bend you over my knee for your recklessness." 

Heat shot up in Alyssa's cheeks and she cleared her throat.  "May I choose?" 

"No," Aemond growled. "The decision depends on the outcome of this night." 

"In that case, I expect your admiration later." She grinned broadly, knowing full well that she was teasing him. She leaned forward and gave Vermithor the command to fly ahead.  He might be smaller than Vhagar, but faster.  The wind blew in her face, but Alyssa felt free.  Up here on Vermithor's back, about to fly into battle, was exactly where she belonged.

She heard Aemond shouting her name, but his words were swallowed by the wind. Alyssa didn't have to tell Vermithor where they were going.  Her faithful friend seemed to know her destination.  The Steppstones lay squarely between Dorne, Tyrosb, and the Disputed Lands.  The flight with the dragons didn't last long and soon you could hear the sounds of war, smell the ash, the smoke.  It mingled with the salt of the sea.

She motioned for Vermithor to stay aloft and waited for Vhagar and Aemond.  "Are you ready?" 

Aemond's face was grim. He looked at the situation at sea, trying to get an overview. The fleet of Corlys Velaryon was clearly recognizable by the seahorses on the sails. "I agreed to this, but-" 

"You don't need to be afraid. The dragons know what they're doing.” 

Aemond shook his head.  "I don't doubt Vhagar, I doubt your sanity."

"I know what I'm doing, Aemond. Even if we don't do much, we are helping.  Even if we only sink two ships, it makes a big difference.” She understood his concern, might even understand the fear.  She was scared in her first battle, too, but once Vermithor flew her through the enemy lines, all was forgotten. All she had felt was the flames on her skin, the wind in her hair, and the screams of her enemies in her ears.

"You can stay up here.  I won't force you to participate, if you have any doubts you're no help to me anyway." Her grip on the straps tightened and Alyssa leaned forward in the saddle. „Ivestragī īlva jikagon, Vermithor.  Pōnta jorrāelagon īlva“, that's how she got Vermithor to understand that they were needed and he should fly.

Vermithor roared.  He dived and sped toward the enemy ships. "Dracarys!" Alyssa screamed. A blink of an eye later, the dragon breathed fire and the first ship burst into flames.  Screams rang out.  Fearful and pained among the Triarchy, wobbling calls among the Velarian soldiers. She saw Vhagar catch up to her as well and another ship burned.  Alyssa was intoxicated.  She was in a war, side by side with Aemond Targaryen.  She could never have imagined that.

Alyssa steered Vermithor across the sea towards the shore.  The ships of the Triarchy had catapults on deck there with those that bombarded the mainland with flaming rocks.  Alyssa would prevent that.

Vermithor flew close to a ship and destroyed a catapult with his claws. Alyssa survey the situation.  She had never been so close to a ship and its crew. She heard Vermithor's roar before she saw the arrows and spears.  Another ship attacked them. The arrows ricochet off Vermithor's scales. His skin was too thick to be damaged by the attacks.

"Alyssa, fly higher!" Aemond commanded.  He yelled down at her at the top of his lungs.  Vhagar, too, now flew close to the surface of the water.  

"Soon, just one more," she pointed to another catapult.  "No!" she heard Aemond yell, but Vermithor had already flown off.  With his feet, Vermithor yanked the catapult off the deck, ripping a hole in the ship. 

„Sȳz valītsos. Sir eglikta“, she praised the dragon and commanded him to fly higher. Just as she was about to mount, she saw Aemond still behind her.  Vhagar was attacked by arrows and spears.  She roared and breathed fire.  Aemond tried to stay in the saddle as Vhagar dodged the attacks.  However, during one maneuver, a spear came straight at Aemond.  Alyssa screamed his name as she saw him slip out of the saddle and fall into the water.

„Aemond“, she screamed again. „Ilagon, Vermithor“, she commanded the dragon to fly down. Aemond had crashed near the shore.  The water was not that deep here, so there was a great danger of being seen and captures by the enemy.  Vermithor landed on a gigantic rock sticking out of the water.  He roared, stopping the soldiers from Alyssa, who slipped from the saddle. „Mīsagon īlva,“ Protection was exactly what she needed and Vermithor could grant her this.

Alyssa slid into the water, she could see Aemond.  He swam motionless on the surface.  The water was cold und she began immediately to freeze. „Fucking shit!" she growled.  Engaged just a day and she accidentally killed him.  Alyssa swam to Aemond, bits of wood and flotsam in her way.  "Aemond" she called as she reached and pulled him close.  The wet leather pulled them both down, but Alyssa managed to pull Aemond back to Vermithor.  Vhagar circled overhead, setting ships on fire. Alyssa couldn't tell if it was hers or the enemy's.

She heard Aemond growl, or was it a groan?  "Aemond," she said, brushing his wet hair out of his face.  She couldn't see any injuries.  The spear had missed him.  Thank the gods! She cupped his face in her hands.  His skin was ice cold, his eyes were closed.  "Aemond, please open your eyes."

Alyssa was scared.  She was afraid for him.  Perhaps the impact on the water had been too hard, or he had been in the cold water for too long.  Maybe he was hurt after all and she just didn't see the wound.  She began rubbing his face helplessly.

„Kostilus, umbagon lēda nyke“, she begged Aemond to stay with her. A sob escaped Alyssa and she laid her head on Aemond's chest.  She was afraid that he had stopped breathing.  But she clearly heard his strong heartbeat.

„Iksan sȳz, ñuha jorrāelagon“, Aemond moaned.  He called her "my love" again and affirmed that he was fine.

Alyssa sat up quickly. Tears ran down her face and she looked at Aemond in shock.  She cried, damn shit, she cried!  In front of him!  Alyssa staggered back and hid her face from him. Wiped away the tears and tried to calm down.  He was fine, no need to panic. But it didn't help.  Another sob escaped her and she put a hand over her mouth and closed her eyes.

Two arms wrapped around her waist and she was pinned against a hard chest.  "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you.  I'm fine, I promise. Gaomagon daor limagon“, he begged her to stop crying. Aemond had laid his head on her shoulder and buried his face in her neck.  He held her tight and Alyssa felt the warmth of his body despite the cold and wet clothes she was wearing. His lips brushed the skin of her neck and Alyssa swallowed hard. 

His closeness felt good.  Relief spread through her.  He was alive, he was unharmed.  She wrapped her hands around Aemond's arms and held him tight as well.  So they sat there for a while.  Alyssa between Aemond's legs, her back pressed against his chest as he brushed his lips gently over her skin.

"We have to go," Alyssa whispered as she watched the sky slowly turned brighter.  They sat on the stone, sheltered by their dragons, while the battle still raged around them.

Aemond's grip on her tightened.  “That was close, Alyssa.  It didn't take much and we wouldn’t return to King's Landing, at least not the two of us.  Promise me that you will never put yourself in such danger again.”

Tonight was the first time Alyssa thought she was going to die.  Would Aemond have died here on the Steppstones, she would never have forgiven herself.  A part of her would have died with him and it would have been her own fault. 

„Kivio nyke“, Aemond demanded again. Wanted her to make a promise to him. 

Alyssa nodded. „I promise.“ She would never take him with her again. Would never put him in such danger again. 

„Good“, mumbled Aemond against her neck bevor he pressed a soft kiss agains her skin. „Now let’s fly home. That was enough for one night.“

He pulled Alyssa to her feet with him.  Her whole body was shaking now, but she pulled herself together.  Aemond looked at her, put a hand on her cheek and gently stroked her skin.  Then he leaned in and planted a kiss on her forehead.  "If I have to put myself in danger again just to hold you, I'll do it gladly again."

Alyssa looked at him in surprise. "I hope you don't have to do that again." She still felt the fear inside her;  the fear for him. She didn't want to go through that again.

Aemond smiled at her.  "I hope not either.  Next time maybe you'll allow me to hold you without falling off Vhagar before.“

"You're freezing," was the first thing Aemond said to her as they crept into the keep. 

Alyssa nodded.  "As soon as I'm out of the wet clothes, I warm myself up by the fire." The wet leather clung to her skin and itched uncomfortably.  Aemond had to feel the same way.  He too was soaked from head to toe.

As they turned down the hallway to her chambers, Aemond jerked her back and Alyssa hissed.  "Since when do guards stand at my door?  What are they doing there?” Two knights of the Kingsguard were standing there, blocking her access to her room.  She couldn't sneak past them.  Just entering her chambers was out of the question either, because the knights would tell either Daemon or Alicent what had happened.

„They protect the betrothed of their prince“, mumbled Aemond, but he seemed annoyed with the situation. 

„Did you order that?“

Aemond shook his head. "But I might have if I had known what you do at night.  Come this way.” He took her by the hand and pulled her with him.  Alyssa followed him without a word.  Did he know another way into her chambers?  A secret passage maybe?  But when Alyssa realized where Aemond was leading her, she stopped short.

"These are your chambers," she stated dryly. 

 Aemond turned to her, the corners of his mouth turned up.  "I've always admired your ingenuity."

Alyssa rolled her eyes.  "What are we doing here?" she demanded.  

Aemond opened the doors and let them in.  "Exactly what you just said.  Get out of the wet clothes and warm up in front of the fire.  Or do you want to freeze yourself to death?"

Alyssa opened her mouth and closed it again as words from Aemond reached her.  Get out of your clothes.. by all the gods!  She certainly wouldn't undress in front of him! That's exactly what she was about to say to Aemond as he pushed the wet coat off his shoulders.  The tunic and waistcoat followed.  Alyssa stared wide-eyed at his bare back.

Her throat went dry and she blinked in surprise as Aemond turned to face her, eyebrow raised at her.  "You can stare all you want, but you should take off your wet clothes." 

"Are you serious?", she asked, her voice shaking. "I'm definitely not undressing in front of you!  That's not right!" She knew that she sounded like a scared and prudish little virgin, but that was exactly what Alyssa was.  Aemond might have had his experiences with women, but Alyssa hadn't. To be honest, Aemond was the first men she saw shirtless. Apart from Daemon when they trained together. But that does not count.

She felt her face getting hot and looked away.  Alyssa looked everywhere but at Aemond.  Until she heard his laughter.  "Since when do you care about rules? Or what is right and wrong?  Secretly flying to the Steppstones is fine, but being in a room with me to warm you up isn't?”

"That's something completely different," she hissed.  "I can't be alone in a room with you.  Half-naked, if I have to remind you.”

She only raised her head when she saw Aemond's boots in her field of vision.  "I just want you to warm up.  A cold is the last thing we need.  I won't touch you indecently, I won't even look at you if that's what worries you.  I have my honor, Alyssa.  I would never force or pressure you into anything before the wedding. Even after that I will never force myself on you.”

Her cheeks grew even hotter and she clenched her teeth.  She hadn't thought that Aemond would take advantage of the situation.  That would not have occurred to her at all.  Still, she wasn't sure how to handle the situation.  Alyssa wanted to be the strong one in his presence, didn't want to show any weakness, didn't want to make herself vulnerable. 

She swallowed hard.  "You won't look," she demanded in a hoarse voice.  Aemond just looked at her for a moment, then nodded. Alyssa had never been shy. Neither in terms of what she said nor what she did. Even as she got older and her body changed, she wasn't embarrassed. She knew she looked good. She noticed the looks of men admiring her body. But just at that moment, she was embarrassed. Aemond made her embarrassed, made her nervous and insecure. Just like a shy little girl.

She fiddled with the clasps on her riding gear, undid tabs and buttons until the waistcoat fell to the ground. Aemond had turned away from her and walked to a dresser across the room. Alyssa felt her body tremble as the cold took hold of her. The shirt she was wearing underneath was transparent and she could see her erect nipples. The cold water made them hard and sensitive. She slowly pulled her shirt over her head so that she was standing shirtless in Aemond's room. She definitely hadn't expected that.

The pants were harder to pull off her legs than the shirt. They were soaked and stuck to her body. When Alyssa finally got rid of them, she covered her nakedness with her arms as best she could. She was naked and keenly aware that she was not alone. She sensed Aemond's presence. Not his looks, but his closeness.

"Here," he said, handing her a dry shirt. "Put that on and go over to the fire. You've been in those wet clothes long enough."

Alyssa took the garment from him. He still didn't look at her, but she noticed that he too was wearing dry clothes now. New pants and a loose shirt. Alyssa swallowed hard and slipped the shirt on. It smelled like him. Like Aemond. Spicy, woody, and... Alyssa couldn't quite name the smell, but she knew it. It was familiar to her and she felt comfortable, like home. She padded over to the fire on bare feet and sat down on the thick carpet in front of it. Aemond, on the other hand, leaned against the fireplace and stared down into the flames.

She bent her legs and slipped the fabric of the shirt over it as best as she could. It was way too big for her, reaching halfway up her thighs when standing and covering all the areas that needed to be covered.

A wine glass appeared in her field of vision and she looked up at Aemond. "That helps to warm up," he said simply and Alyssa took the mug from him. She sipped the drink and found herself calming down.

"I'm sorry about what happened earlier. I should never have asked you to fly with me," she said softly, her eyes on the fire.

 A snort was heard behind her. "You shouldn't have even thought of flying to the Stepstones. I'm glad I went there with you. If the spear had hit you instead..." Aemond didn't finish the sentence.

Alyssa turned and looked at him. His jawline was tight, a dark shadow hung around his mouth and she saw the hardness in his eye.

"I'm fine. There's nothing to worry about," she said softly.

Aemond looked at her and shook his head. "Yes, there is. You don't think enough about yourself."

Alyssa rolled her eyes. "I can take care of myself."

"That's not what I meant. You care too much about others and forget about yourself. Daemon may not care what you do and neither does my sister, but we are engaged, Alyssa . I care if you put yourself in danger."

She wanted to disagree. Wanted to tell him that she had never put herself in danger, but said nothing. Tonight had proved to her that danger had always been there. She'd just been lucky so far.

"You promised. Remember that."

Alyssa looked at Aemond, who now sat down next to her on the carpet. His face was expressionless. "You promised not to fly to the Stepstones again."

Alyssa nodded hesitantly. She had. And she wasn't one to break a promise. 

She brought the mug back to her lips and took a long gulp of wine. The alcohol warmed her from the inside. The cold slowly left her body and the shaking stopped.

"Want some more?" Aemond asked, pointing to her mug.

Alyssa wordlessly held out her glass to him. But instead of simply refilling her glass, Aemond took the cup from her. His fingers wrapped around her hand and Alyssa looked at him in astonishment.

He held her hand in his. Gently stroked the scar that ran across the palm of her hand. A shiver ran down Alyssa's spine at the gentle touch and she wanted to pull her hand away, but Aemond held her tight.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there for you then."

"You couldn't have prevented it." And that was the truth. Aemond couldn't have put up a fight against the man who did this to her either. Like herself, he was only a child back then.

"Maybe not, but I could have tried."

Alyssa laughed sadly. "You would have just lost an eye sooner. That wouldn't have helped anyone."

Aemond looked at her with a warning expression on his face. "Don't joke about it."

"Is there someone sensitive?"

Aemond's mouth tightened and Alyssa knew she had hit the mark. He was unsure about the lack of his eye. Had he been teased about the injury? Had he been mocked?

Alyssa wanted to ask, but she didn't. She didn't want to dig into his wounds.  "It doesn't look that bad," she said softly.

Aemond's eye turned to her. He seemed shy, embarrassed. "Stop it. You don't have to say that."

"What shouldn't I say?"

He sighed and rubbed his face with his hand. The other was still holding Alyssas. "Something to cheer me up. I know what I look like. What other people see in me. What people say about me." 

"Like that you're a handsome prince, with a short temper and way too much arrogance?" She teased him, not wanting him to look as vulnerable as he did the moment before.

Aemond looked at her, his eye narrowed. "No, they don't say that. And you know it."

"It would be the truth though," Alyssa whispered, holding his gaze.

Aemond just grunted and looked away from her. Stared at her clasped hands instead and stroked her scar again. Goosebumps spread over Alyssa's body and she realized again that she was wearing nothing but his shirt. Her nipples rose and throbbed, and a warm feeling spread through her stomach.

Then, as he brought her hand to his mouth and kissed the scar, Alyssa caught her breath. But she was shaking and Aemond noticed.

"Does it hurt?"

She shook her head wordlessly. Her cheeks were probably as red as the wine and her eyes the size of saucers. She had never been as close to anyone as to Aemond in that moment.

He brought her hand to his lips again, but this time his eye was on her. Watching her reaction. Alyssa was breathing heavily. She felt her body tense in anticipation. Even if she didn't know exactly what to expect.

"Aemond-" she said, but it sounded more like a moan. She bit her lower lip and closed her eyes.

"Should I stop?"

Yes!

"No," she whispered.

As if he could feel her inner struggle, he let go of her hand. Alyssa wanted to protest, but then he grabbed her waist and pulled her to him. She sat between his legs, much like on the Stepstones. But this time her face was turned to him. She looked into his eye, into the bright purple. Could she get drunk on someone else? Get intoxicated by his presence? Alyssa felt drugged, like Aemond was her drug. She didn't do anything. Just stared at him.

"What are you thinking about?" Aemond then asked. His voice was low, yet throaty.

"Nothing at all." And yet of everything. She couldn't think straight. Too much was going through her mind. Out of urgency, Alyssa put a hand to Aemond's cheek. Just below the eye patch and stroking the scar that disappeared underneath.

"Do you always wear it?"

Aemond nodded hesitantly.

"Why?"

He looked at her silently. As if the reason was obvious.

"You lost an eye while claiming a dragon. You shouldn't have to hide it. Wear the scar with pride."

She said that to herself every day when she looked at her hands. She hated the scars and yet she was glad to have them. Because those scars meant she lived. That she was alive, that Helaena was alive. If it weren't for those scars, they might both have died then.

Aemond shook her head and Alyssa dropped her hands. "I don't want them to call me a monster."

"Who would call you that?"

"Everyone."

Alyssa sighed heavily. "Aemond you're not a monster. It doesn't matter how bad the scar looks. Looks aren't everything in life. Beauty isn't everything in life. Some are lucky, some aren't. Beauty is beyond our control."

A hard laugh escaped Aemond. "It's easy to tell when you look like a valyrian goddess." His words weren't harsh or filled with envy. But on the contrary. He said it softly, yet full of affection.

"I don't give a shit about beauty."

Aemond laughed at her words and his hand found its way to her waist. He gently stroked her body, which was covered by his shirt. "I will remember that.“

"It's the truth," Alyssa asserted. "There are much more important things in life. Intelligence, honesty, loyalty, courage." While Aemond still had to work on his honesty, he was loyal to his family. He was intelligent and inquisitive and he was brave. Claiming Vhagar had proved that.

"May I?" Alyssa asked quietly, putting her hand on Aemond's cheek again.

He took a deep breath. She could see the uncertainty in his eye. But he nodded. Carefully, she slipped off his eyepatch and exhaled.

"I know it's-"

"Beautiful." Alyssa stared at the sapphire that replaced Aemond's missing eye. It shone in a beautiful blue and the fire in the fireplace made it glow. Aemond looked at her wide-eyed and only then did she realize what she had just said. Alyssa cleared her throat. "I mean the stone, the stone is beautiful."

It really didn't look as bad as she had feared. She could still remember the swelling scar. How it had looked when Aemond had only just lost his eye. The scar was still visible, but it had healed. Much like what happened with Alyssa's palms. It didn't look bad or repulsive. If she was honest, Alyssa had rarely seen anything more attractive.

"Why a sapphire? Wouldn't an amethyst have been a better color match?" she then asked, frowning. She could remember a conversation when they were on their way to Driftmark. About the blue shades of the sea and that of the sky.

"You know why," Aemond said simply.

Then it clicked. Sapphire blue. Her favourite color.

Alyssa swallowed hard and licked her lips. Aemond followed her with his eye and she felt him catch his breath.

"Then I should be glad that you are wearing the sapphire and not me. Otherwise I would have had to carry out my threat and strangle you with it."

Aemond looked at her in surprise, but then started laughing. It was a laugh Alyssa hadn't heard in a long time. Everything inside her tightened. "I must have forgotten that part." His thumb made small circles on her waist and his gaze was fixed on her. There was only warmth in it.

"How could you?" she asked quietly, her voice thick. "That was the most important part of this conversation."

Aemond grinned but shook his head. "It wasn't." He leaned forward and rested his forehead against hers.

Alyssa could feel his breath on her face. As well as her own arousal. By all gods. She was aroused. At the hands of Aemond fucking Targaryen. She wanted more, more from him, more from his closeness and above all from his hands.

She looked at him and stroked his cheek with both hands. "I still love the color."

Aemond's grip tightened and in one fluid motion he pulled her to him and pressed his lips to hers. Alyssa groaned in surprise, but she closed her eyes and savored the kiss. Pressed her lips to his as well and then parted hers. Their tongues met and Alyssa didn't know what to feel or think. She wanted him so much. And she had missed him. 

Aemond's hands ran down her back as Alyssa tucked hers into his hair. They were soft and slipped through her fingers like silk. The kiss became more intense, stormy, until they broke apart and looked at each other, heavily breathing.

„Nyke pendagon nyke own ao iā dōron isse keskydoso ēnka“.

He would have to get her a stone of the same color. Alyssa's eyes widened and she shook her head. He just shouldn't think about giving her a stone of that color. His High Valyrian sent shivers down her spine and Alyssa pressed herself closer to him.

"Don't you dare. Otherwise I'll keep my promise."

Aemond chuckled and buried his face in her neck. Inhaled deeply and took in her scent. His arms wrapped around her tightly and pressed her to him. "You will hardly be able to strangle me with a sapphire ring."

"Then it's a good thing I don't wear rings," she said defiantly.

She felt his lips on her neck. How he kissed her there and then sucked where her pulse was. Alyssa shut her eyes and moaned.

“This one... you're going to wear. And if it's the only thing you're wearing on your body, I'm fine with that." Another kiss, right on her collarbone, which was now exposed in front of him. The shirt had tumbled down a bit, but still covered most of her body. "Just think of it as an engagement present."

Thinking wasn't something Alyssa was up to at the moment. All she felt was Aemond's strong arms around her waist, his warmth and his lips exploring her neck. 

But something else popped into her mind. A snippet of a conversation.

Her heart is blue.

Blue like a jewel. Like a sapphire. Like the eye of the person she was holding in her arms at that moment and didn't want to let go. 

Not green, not black. Blue.

___________________________

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[apricia]

For ever by your side // Aemond Targaryen x Reader // Part XII

Chapter 12 - Apologies and open hearts

She left, Alyssa left the room without him doing anything. A jolt went through his body as he looked after her. He should follow her, now!

But his mother's voice stopped him. She stepped up to him, clutching his upper arm, and Aemond saw something on her face he'd never seen when she looked at him. Disgust. Disappointment.

"Why would you say such a thing before these people?"

Aemond gritted his teeth. "I was merely expressing how proud I am of my family, Mother. Mh, though it seems my nephews aren't quite as proud of theirs." He pulled away from her, but Alicent blocked his path again.

"And what about Alyssa? Was you expressing how proud you were when you called her a bastard? A whore?" Alicent swallowed hard. She didn't even want to put the word in her mouth. "Tell me Lucerys lied, tell me you didn't wish her death, Aemond!" Alicent yelled at him. He hated it when she screamed.

Aemond swallowed hard and looked at his mother wordlessly. The queen slowly shook her head, tears of disappointment welling up in her eyes. "I can not believe it."

"Mother, I-" he grabbed her hand, but Alicent jerked himself away from him. "How could you say that to her, Aemond? To her of all people?"

"Because he's a little piece of shit," Jace yelled, ready to attack Aemond again. But he was held back by Daemon.

"Wait, wait!"

Aemonds narrowed his eyes. His uncle stepped towards him, chin raised, hands clasped, frowning at Aemond.

"You're not worthy of marrying my daughter. I hope you know that, boy."

Aemond gritted his teeth. They would see that!

He left the room without another word. His uncle's words enraged him, but the anger didn't control his body. Instead, he kept seeing the disappointed look on his mother's face. For a brief moment, Aemond thought she was going to hit him. As she often did with Aegon. But the hit hadn't come, even though Aemond deserved it. He even wished his mother would have hit him. The main thing was that the disappointment disappeared from her face.

Alyssa's words hadn't been better. She had called him a coward and she was right about that. He had said far worse things to her for which he had never apologized to her. And now everyone in his family knew what had really happened back then. He was angry with himself, almost disgusted. His otherwise iron control over himself and his actions was gone. Whenever he was reminded of the loss of his eye, of his misbehavior towards Alyssa, his patience snapped. Luke and Jace Velaryon were red rags to him. Her lineage, her demeanor, just the fact that the two boys were breathing, that they were called princes when they were nothing more than bastards, made his blood boil. When he thought of Jace touching Alyssa, how Luke snapped at her, he wanted to put his hands around his nephews' throats and squeeze. He wanted to feel the life drain from them. Out of jealousy, out of hatred.

The evening had started so well. Alyssa in her blue dress had taken his breath away. She hadn't known the dress had been a gift from him, the same shade of blue as the sapphire in his eye. But she'd liked the dress, she'd said so herself. And the fact that she was wearing - even happily wearing - what he had chosen for her pleased him. After years of isolation, absence and silence, he had been able to hold her hand. Several times that evening. They had supported each other, comforted each other. That was exactly what Aemond wanted. He wanted Alyssa, wanted everything from her. Her sorrow, her pain as well as her joy and love. He wanted to be there for her when she needed him. Wanted to dry her tears and he wanted to be the reason for her smile.

His hands clenched into fists as he thought about how the evening had ended. He stopped and punched the nearest wall. Pain shot through his wrist, but Aemond ignored it. He hadn't noticed that he had gone straight to Alyssa's chambers in his trance. He was only a few meters away from her door. Aemond swallowed. He needed to talk to her. Now or he would regret it.

Hesitantly, he went to her door, which surprisingly was not guarded. He raised his hand and knocked once. Twice

"One moment, I'm coming," Alyssa's voice came out muffled.

Was she already asleep? He could hardly imagine that, after all she had left the room only minutes before him. Did she cry? Aemond prayed that wasn't the case. He heard footsteps on the other side and then the door was opened for him. Just a crack wide.

When Alyssa saw him, she narrowed her eyes and pulled the robe she was wearing closer around her body. "What do you want here? Don't you think you've done enough tonight?"

Aemond gritted his teeth, bowed his head. "May I come in?"

"For what?" Alyssa asked, raising an eyebrow. She hadn't opened the door further for him. 

"We need to talk," he said softly.

"Oh, do we have to? What a pity I don't feel like it."

Aemond sighed and shook his head. "I'm not going to apologize to you out here in the hall. We're going to have this conversation privately."

Alyssa looked at him in surprise. "That almost sounds like a threat. If we don't have the conversation just between the two of us, then we won't have it at all. Is that what you want to say?"

Aemond shook his head again. "No, I didn't mean to say that. I just want to talk to you face to face. So would you'll let me come in or not?" He could see that she would like to say no. But after a moment's hesitation, Alyssa opened the door for him. 

"You have five minutes."

This was going to be the most exhausting conversation he'd ever had. He entered her room and looked around. It had hardly changed. Six years ago he had been here often. Had sat on Alyssa's bed and missed her. Sometimes even cried when he had felt the loss of his best friend particularly strongly. But at some point he had forbidden himself to come here. The memories of Alyssa were just too present here.

Alyssa stopped in front of a small table with a wine carafe on it. "You wanted to talk, so talk." She crossed her arms over her chest and looked at him invitingly. Her robe reached to the floor and she clung to the fabric like she was cold. There was a pleasant warmth in the room. The fire in the hearth near the bed crackled, bathing the room in a warm glow, as did the countless candles that were burning.

Aemond's gaze drifted to the fire in the hearth. "I am sorry“, he said softly.

"What for exactly?" She made it difficult for him. On purpose and Aemond deserved nothing less.

He looked up and looked at her. Her chin was set in defiance. Her lips were drawn into a thin line and her eyes blazed with the familiar fire. "What I said to you six years ago. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that."

Alyssa nodded. "No, you shouldn't." She said no more. Just kept looking at him expectantly. Aemond didn't know what to say or do. How to express his feelings. Where is the best place to start? How could he make her understand that he hadn't meant any of this? Would she even listen to him, after all, his apology came six years too late?

Aemond crossed his arms behind his body. "I didn't mean any of that."

Alyssa looked surprised, but then she laughed. It was not a nice laugh, not a laugh of joy. It was hard, bitter even. "Aemond, stop it. We both know you meant it exactly like you said it."

Aemond's jaw clenched. "No, I didn't. They were words spoken in anger."

Alyssa looked away and shook her head. Her arms clasped her torso. "And yet they were true. I'm a bastard and I'm a whore's daughter. Are you going to deny that now? Don't bother. We both know it's true."

She might try to act strong, like she didn't mind the words, but Aemond could see behind her mask. Words like bastard and whore nagged at her, turning her into a vulnerable little girl again. He could hardly bear the sight. He bridged the distance between them. Aemond grabbed her forearm and held her back. "Stop saying that“, he said through clenched teeth.

Alyssa looked down at his hands holding her upper arms. Then she looked up. There was a mixture of shame and sadness in it. "What? Now these words bother you, what an irony."

Did she think he cared about the words for his sake? That he would mind marrying a whore's daughter? How wrong she was. "Stop calling yourself that.“

Confusion was visible on Alyssa's face. Like it made a difference if he said those words to her or she said them to herself. "Don't be stupid. Why should I deny the truth?"

She didn't understand him. His grip tightened. „It’s not about the truth. You are more than that, Alyssa. I said that to hurt you." That was the only reason. He had believed then that she had not wanted to help him. That she had turned away from him. And he wanted to punish her for that. He had said the words he knew would hurt her. But in the moment he saw the hurt in her eyes, he regretted his words immediately.

"And you succeeded." Alyssa didn't look at him as she spoke, but he heard her voice tremble.

Aemond's chest tightened in pain. His grip on her upper arms relaxed and he gently ran his thumbs over her skin. "I know and I'm sorry about that. I never meant to hurt you. What I said was wrong. And for not coming to you straight away, too. I should have asked for your forgiveness right away, but I didn't."

It wasn't easy for him to apologize. It didn't matter with whom, it was even worse when he had really done something wrong, like now. Ever since the incident from back then, Aemond has strived to behave impeccably, not to make mistakes, and to be close to perfection. Not to do or say anything that might prompt an apology. Because he hated it! Hated having to admit a mistake.

Alyssa didn't say anything, but felt a lump form in her throat and a sob wanted to come out of it. "It does not matter anymore." She took a step away from him.

"Yes it does." He pulled her to him again and wrapped his fingers around hers. Trapped their intertwined hands between their bodies. "What I said back then... That I wish you would die the way your mother did... I didn't mean it." Aemond closed his eye and shook his head. "Just the thought of you being dead… Whether it's on the streets of Fleabottom or anywhere else, my heart is clenching and I can't breathe. I can't lose you. Just the thought of losing you drives me insane."

Over the years he had often wondered how Alyssa was doing. Was she okay, had she perhaps fallen ill? Had she been injured riding Vermithor? The insecurity, the ignorance of how she was doing had always tugged at him. But the one time Aegon had teased him that Alyssa might already be dead and he didn't know it had made Aemond incensed. He had slapped his brother in the face when he was thirteen years old and only stopped beating Aegon after Ser Criston had pulled him off his brother. It had only been a joke, a silly remark of the sort he knew from Aegon, but Alyssa's death was nothing to joke about. Aegon had to experience that first hand in that moment.

Aemond opened his eyes. Alyssa stared at him in disbelief. "Why are you saying that? Right now? After all this time?" Alyssa asked, tears running slowly down her cheeks.

"Because it's true," Aemond whispered, unclasping their hands and wiping the tears from her cheek. There was tenderness in his eyes.

"Don't," she whispered, closing her eyes as she felt Aemond's touch on her face.

But he wiped her face softly, dried her tears. "I want you to know how sorry I am for everything. You were my best friend, my only ally and I wronged you. I received my punishment for that."

Alyssa started and made a face. "Oh, did you? I think the punishment is yet to come, after all we're not married yet." She didn't move, allowing him to continue to hold her face in his hands. Aemond enjoyed the touch, enjoyed the warmth of her body.

The corners of his mouth lifted in a smile as he gently stroked her face with his thumb. "Marrying you will not be a punishment, Alyssa. That's all I ever wanted. No, my punishment was that I had to live without you for the past six years. You don't know how hard it has been." He had never been as close to his siblings as he was to her. Her absence had been clearly felt in his family. She had torn a gap in their family ties that no one could fill or mend. Aemond had known a loneliness he hadn't known existed.

Indeed, Alyssa knew exactly how hard it has been. Knew it all too well. She knew the loneliness. She'd felt the same without him by her side. But she wouldn't tell him that. Instead, she tried to break free of his grip. Aemond didn't want to let go of her, but he was afraid to push her into anything. To take away the space she might need.

Alyssa took a step back, leaving Aemond's proximity. She wrapped her arms around her body again as if she needed support. He couldn't see her face, but he was afraid of what he would see there. "Please don't hate me. I can take a lot of things, but I couldn't take it if you hated me." His voice broke at the end of the sentence. He was more vulnerable than ever.

Surprised, Alyssa raised her eyes and looked at Aemond. She wanted to hate him, wanted to tell him  that she felt nothing for him but hatred. She wanted to hurt him like he had hurt her all these years ago. But she couldn't. She would never be able to hate Aemond. She could never feel that way for him.

"I don't hate you, Aemond." Their eyes met and she saw different things in his eye. Disbelief, relief, hope, but also skepticism. "I couldn't even if I wanted to. By hating you I would only hurt myself." Her words were true and revealed her soul.

Aemond reached out and pulled her to him. Their bodies touched, Alyssa's chest pressed against his. He could probably feel her heartbeat, but Alyssa thought she could feel his. Or was it her own heart that was beating so fast? Aemond leaned forward and Alyssa caught her breath. He didn't want to kiss her now, did he? But he just leaned his forehead against hers.

"Iksan vaoreznuni. Nyke kivio bona kesan dōrī ōdrikagon ao arlī"

He was sorry and he never wanted to hurt her again? Alyssa didn't know if she could believe his words. Even if parts of her wanted to. More than anything else.

"You hurt me. A lot," she whispered.

She saw the pain on his face. „Kostilus, shijetra nyke“.

He pleaded, that she would forgive him. But did he deserve her forgiveness?

"Aemond, your words-"

His hands were on her back, slowly wandering lower and coming to rest on her hips. "I would undo all of this in an instant if I could, but I can't. Your forgiveness is all I want, all I need. Please, Alyssa."

Her heart ached. Seeing him like that broke all her walls down. Aemond broke down every wall she had built around herself and her wounded heart over the years. With just a few words he managed to pave a way into her innermost being again.

„Kostilus, ñuha jorrāelagon, ivestragī nyke prove ziry“.

Alyssa didn't know what surprised her more. That Aemond called her 'my love' or that he wanted to prove his remorse to her.

"Let me show you how sorry I am“, he continued.

"How?" She wanted to know.

"Tell me what you want in return, say it and it's yours."

Alyssa shook her head. "It doesn't work that way, Aemond, and you know it."

He nodded haltingly, swallowed. "Then tell me what I can do to make it up to you."

Alyssa considered his words. She didn't know what to do or say, what was an appropriate punishment for what he had done to her. Nor did she know what he could do to make amends. She didn't need anything from him. "I don't hate you, Aemond. But I don't trust you anymore. We're strangers after all these years, and now we’re engaged.“ She laughed hard. „Gods, this is insane.“

Aemond took a step away from her, but his hands were still on her hips. "I will regain your trust. Even if it's the last thing I do." She looked at him, he held her gaze. A determined look crossed his face and the purple in his eye brightened. Alyssa swallowed.

"Such big words. Words without action mean nothing.“

His jaws tightened. He could understand her, could understand that words alone didn't change anything, that they alone couldn't make amends. But Alyssa underestimated Aemond's willingness to win her over. "Then tell me what to do, Alyssa. Tell me now and I'll do it."

Alyssa opened her mouth, then closed it again. "There is indeed something you can do."

___________________________

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[apricia]

For ever by your side / Aemond Targaryen x reader // Part XI

Chapter 11 - Announced engagements and heated tempers

Evening came far too quickly, and with it dinner, after the king had so urgently requested. All his family members gathered at one table. Alyssa had considered placing bets on how many severed limbs would follow. After all, that wasn't unusual for her family, considering the late Ser Vaemond.

Alyssa had held her breath when she saw the dress she was supposed to wear tonight. She didn't know if it was a gift from the Queen or Princess Rhaenyra, but it didn't matter. It was beautiful and Alyssa wanted to wear it immediately. Helaena's mysterious words had come back to her when she saw the dress: her heart is blue.

She thought sadly of her engagement. Her heart would probably never turn green, at least not if she believed Helaena's words. So her uncle wouldn't be right if he believed that she and Aemond would have a happy marriage.

To be honest, Alyssa hadn't gotten used to the idea of marrying Aemond this week. She still hadn't realized what had happened this afternoon. What that meant to her.

She would move back to King's Landing, live here in the red keep again. Together with her husband. A hysterical laugh escaped her at the thought. She would definitely need wine tonight, lots of it.

Alyssa nervously ran her hands over the blue fabric of the dress. The color reminded her of sapphires. The corsage was tight to her body and the neckline was lower than she was used to. The sleeves were made of a sheer, wide fabric that gathered again tightly at the wrists. The dress billowed around her hips and ran into a full skirt that swayed with every step. The dress was not made of the heavy fabrics customary at court. It was light and silky and Alyssa could move easily in it. The skirt offered enough room to attach her holster to her thigh, where a dagger was hidden. If there was any debauchery tonight, at least she wouldn't be unarmed.

She entered the dining room with Baela and Rhaena. Everyone was already assembled except for the king. She saw Rhaenyra and Daemon nod at them and Alyssa followed her sisters to them. Luke and Jace stood together and whispered.

Alyssa lifted her head and looked over at her cousins. Aegon and Aemond stood together, the older one already holding a mug of wine. His words were still floating around in Alyssa's mind and she looked away. Blush spread to her cheeks. She didn't want to think about Aemond in the company of some faceless whore. Certainly not today, not the day she'd been engaged to him. Actually never. 

Alyssa wanted to say hello to Helaena, but she was standing too close to her brothers and Alyssa hadn't drunk enough courage for the conversation. 

She smiled at Luke and Jace and put a hand on the latter's arm. She felt like she was being watched, and when Alyssa looked up, she saw Aemond staring at her. Not her, actually, but the hand that rested on Jace's arm. Alyssa wanted to pull her hand away, but stubborn as she was, she kept it there. He had no right to claim any ownership. 

Two chairs were set up on each of the shorter sides of the table. On the longer side, five stood on one side, that's where the king would sit, facing them were four more chairs. Alyssa wanted to sit in one of the chairs, directly across from Princess Rhaenyra, who was already seated.

„No my dear“, said the queen. „You will sit between Helaena and Aemond this evening. It was a wish of her and honestly it would fill my heart with joy if I would see you two girls together. And given the new circumstances, your place may be at your fiancé's side.“  Queen Alicent smiled brightly at Alyssa und pointed to a seat at one side of the large table. It was the green side, obviously. 

„Of course, my queen“, Alyssa murmured. She felt tension take hold of her. She could not denied Alicent any wishes, even if that would meant to sit next to Aemond for a hole evening. Her fingernails dug into her palms. Right where the scars were still visible. They were a bit faded, but nothing more. 

She slowly walked to the other side of the table. Alyssa felt like this was her way to the gallows when it was just a harmless dinner.

Aegon and Aemond looked at her and Alyssa swallowed. She saw the smirk on Aegon's face while Aemond just looked at her. She couldn't tell for sure what he was thinking. But he eyed her dress with interest.

When the king was carried into the room, everyone went to their places. Aemond pulled Alyssa's chair back and looked at her expectantly. She sat down without looking at him and allowed him to push her to the table before taking a seat next to her. Since when was he such a gentleman?

The tension in her didn't ease. Especially since she felt Aemond's eyes on her. She looked stubbornly straight and met the worried eyes of her sister Rhaena. She smiled encouragingly at Alyssa and the sight of her sister helped Alyssa breathe.

"I didn't expect you to wear that dress," Aemond whispered next to her.

Alyssa forced a look at him. "Why shouldn't I wear it? It's gorgeous." She was tired of always wearing black and red.

Aemond's mouth twitched. "Because I had it made. I didn't think you would accept a gift from me so willingly."

Alyssa gave him a startled look and looked down at herself. "That's from you?"

He nodded. "And it suits you perfectly. You look beautiful."

Alyssa blushed and immediately looked away. She bit the inside of her cheek. "Thank you," she managed to say. "For the dress." She wouldn't say thank you for the compliment, she would just pretend he hadn't said it.

"Always a pleasure," Aemond said and Alyssa heard the amusement in his voice.

He shouldn't be charming. Let alone be nice to her. Why couldn't he be the ass he was six years ago when he'd been throwing all those mean things at her? That would somehow make it easier for her because she wouldn't run the risk of losing her heart to him. Not again. The Aemond before the incident and the Aemond sitting next to her now were far more dangerous to her heart.

The table grew quiet and everyone looked at the king expectantly. He looked exhausted. Even more exhausted than before. The day must have been very tiring for him. Alyssa was concerned.

"How good it is.. to see you all tonight..together." The king looked around. His gaze rested on Alyssa and Aemond a bit longer. He seemed pleased to see them side by side. Alyssa smiled tentatively at her uncle and he nodded at her.

"Prayer before we begin?" asked the queen

"Yes."

Alyssa wasn't used to praying before a meal. They never did that on Dragonstone. There were no false idols and stars hanging from the ceiling either. She wanted to laugh out loud when she thought of Otto Hightower wanting to marry her to Aemond in the light of the seven. That she didn't laugh! Before that, she would rain blood and fire on the sept!

Alyssa clasped her hands but didn't close her eyes like the Queen's family members did. A sideways glance told her that Aemond had closed his eyes. Did he now believe more in the Seven than in the gods of Velyria? 

"May the mother smile down in this gathering with love. May the smith mend the bonds that have been broken for far too long. And to Vaemond Velaryon, may the gods give him rest."

Alyssa raised an eyebrow in astonishment, she looked at Daemon's amused face and rolled her eyes. One did not laugh at the dead. Daemon just didn't know decency!

The prayer was over and Alyssa wasn't sure what the point of it was when half of those present didn't even believe in the seven.

"This is an occasion for celebration, it seems," the king continued. He sounded strained, as if those few words were consuming all of his strength. "My grandsons, Jace and Luke, will marry their cousins, Baela and Rhaena, further strengthening the bond between our houses."

Alyssa smiled at her sisters, who seemed happy with the engagement. The Velaryon boys also seemed content. Alyssa was sure that these marriages would be harmonious, filled with love and respect.

"Also contributing to this is the engagement between my son, Aemond, and my niece, Alyssa. Childhood friends are becoming spouses."

Alyssa felt countless eyes on her. Daemon seemed anything but satisfied, Rhaenyra looked concerned, as did her sisters. Luke and Jace looked annoyed. Aegon seemed amused. Alicent and Helaena smiled at her. Helaena even put her hand on the table and held it out to Alyssa. She grabbed her friend's hand and squeezed it.

She didn't dare look at Aemond. Just couldn't manage to meet his gaze even though she knew he was looking at her.

"A toast to the young princes and their betrothed", the king ended his speech.

"Hear, hear," agreed Daemon. "I still can't believe that one of my daughters is going to marry this cunt," he murmured the last sentence into his mug, but Alyssa and probably everyone else - apart from King Viserys - understood his words.

Alyssa spat the wine she had already drunk back into her mug and looked at Daemon wide-eyed. She did look over at Aemond when she sensed his anger. Like fire on her skin. She prayed to every god she could think of that he wouldn't do anything stupid. That he was more in control than Daemon.

Alyssa put a hand on his arm.

Aemond whirled at her in surprise. He looked at her silently and Alyssa shook her head pleadingly. He nodded as a sign that he would ignore his uncle's words. For now at least.

Aemond might have been in control, his brother was less so. He leaned towards Jace and even though his voice was muffled, Alyssa could hear every word.

"Well done, Jace. You'll finally get to lie with a woman."

Alyssa closed her eyes and shook her head. "He didn't just say that," she whispered.

"Yes he did," Aemond mumbled next to her and he too shook his head at his brother.

"Let us toast as well Prince Lucerys, the future Lord of the Tides," the king continued, apparently oblivious to the teasing at the table.

Alyssa grabbed her mug and raised it to toast her stepbrother. She didn't think it was right for Luke to become driftmark's heir, but ultimately he couldn't do anything about the circumstances of his conception. He couldn't be blamed for that.

Alyssa noticed the loving eye contact between Luke and Rhaena.

"You'll be great," her sister said to him, and Alyssa felt a pang in her heart. Was she jealous of the affection Rhaena and Luke shared? Nonsense!

She looked at Aemond, who was just raising his mug to his lips. He seemed anything but pleased. He glared at Luke over the rim of his glass. Even after all this time, he still seemed to harbor a grudge against the boy who had taken his eye.

Alyssa had already withdrawn her hand, which she regretted at that moment. She wanted to calm him down, maybe even give him comfort, but she kept her hands to herself. She wasn't ready for that yet.

"You do know how the act is done, I assume? At least in principle? Where to put your cock and all that," Aegon was asking Jace.

"Let it be, cousin," Baela murmured at the same moment Alyssa said, "Aegon, stop that."

Her cousin spun around to face her. "I'm not worried about you, dear cousin. My brother knows how to do it."

Alyssa gaped at him, unable to reply. He was referring to their conversation from yesterday. Alyssa pressed her fingernails into her palms. "Aegon," Aemond hissed in warning next to her, but Aegon ignored him. "I'm concerned about little Jace here. He doesn't look like he knows how to please a woman."

"By the gods," Alyssa murmured and closed her eyes. She clenched her jaws and was about to pour the contents of her mug over Aegon's head.

To her own surprise, it was now Aemond who put a hand over Alyssa's. She looked at him startled. "Just don't listen to him." That was easier than said. Especially for him. He probably wasn't imagining doing it with a whore either. But Alyssa was downright plagued by these images.

Jace didn't seem amused by Aegon's words either. "You can play the jester if you wish, but hold you tongue before my betrothed."

Aegon grunted in agreement, but the grin hadn't left his face.

The king banged his cane on the ground, drawing all eyes on him. He struggled to his feet and Alyssa already thought he was going to collapse. Like a puppet whose strings had been cut.

"It both gladdens my heart and fills my with sorrow to see these faces around the table. The faces most dear to me in all the world yet grown so distant from each other in the years that past."

Alyssa looked at the king's words to Aemond, who turned to her at the same moment. They looked at each other without saying a word. There was a distance between them that was difficult to bridge.

The king fumbled with the clasp of his golden mask until he managed to remove it. Alyssa caught her breath at the sight of him. Her uncle was missing his right eye, the skin was translucent and she could see the exposed flesh.

"My own face is no longer a handsome one, if indeed it ever was. But tonight I wish you to see me as I am. Not just a king, but your father, your brother, your husband and your grandsire and uncle. Who may not, it seems, walk for much longer among you."

Alyssa felt tears welling up in her eyes and she put a hand over her heart. She couldn't bear to see Viserys like this. It hurt her heart and she dreaded the day when he would breathe his last.

She felt Aemond move beside her even before she felt a touch on her thigh. He had one hand resting there, gently stroking her leg. As a sign that he was there for her.

Alyssa didn't know what to make of his gesture, but she couldn't bring herself to push him away. His touch was good and it felt right.

"Let us no longer hold ill feelings on our hearts. The crown cannot stand strong if the House of the Dragon remains divided. But set aside your grievances. If not for the sake of the crown, than for the sake of this old man who loves you all so dearly."

Her uncle's words moved Alyssa, reaching something in her heart. She didn't think about it as she placed a hand over Aemond's that was resting on her thigh. She didn't even look over at him. However, felt the warmth of his skin beneath her fingers and heard him take a deep breath.

Alyssa closed her eyes and allowed herself to enjoy Aemond's touch for a moment. To enjoy his presence as if nothing had ever happened between them.

Princess Rhaenyra rose and reached for her mug. "I wish to raise my cup to Her Grace, the Queen. I love my father, but I must admit that no one has stood more loyally by his side than his good wife. She has tended to him with unfailing devotion, love and honor . And for that she has my gratitude and my apology."

Alyssa stared from princess to queen. She had to agree with Rhaenyra's words. The royal couple's marriage was not one of love, at least not in the way Daemon and Rhaenyra's was. Alicent hadn't chosen the king but had done what was asked of her. But she had performed that duty with dignity and honor. Alyssa bit the inside of her cheek. Could she do that too?

"Your graciousness moves me deeply, Princess. We're both mothers and we love our children," Alicent glanced at Aemond and Alyssa and smiled at them. Alyssa returned the queen's smile. "We have more in common than we sometimes allow. I raise my cup to you and to your house. You will make a fine queen."

Alyssa raised her mug to her lips and drank. After the Queen's speech, the mood in the room was tense, almost depressing.

Alyssa looked at her sister Baela, who was fiddling with her hairdo. Two clamps had come loose and some strands fell wildly in her face. She cursed softly.

"Let me help you," Alyssa said quietly. She clasped Aemond's hand and placed it on the table before standing. She felt his questioning look on her. She gave him a shy smile before walking over to Baela.

"Thank you," Baela whispered as Alyssa helped her reattach the strands to the back of her head. She loved her sisters curly hair.

Then Aegon got up and came over to them. He picked up the wine decanter that was on the table between Jace and Baela. As he looked at Alyssa, he grinned.

"I regret the disappointment you are soon to suffer," he said to Baela and poured himself more wine. "But if you ever wish to know what it is to be well satisfied, all you have to do is aks."

Alyssa rolled her eyes. "Like you know how to please a woman. Your whores moan on command and Helaena doesn't look too happy."

Agon looked at her in equal parts angry and amused. "I would make you the same offer, but I don't want to get in my brother's way."

"How very generous of you, Aegon."

He leaned in and kissed Alyssa on the cheek. "For you always."

Jace slammed both fists on the table and jumped out of his seat. Aemond also slammed his wine mug down on the table when he saw his brother kiss Alyssa on the cheek. But it got lost in Jace's demeanor.

Alyssa had straightened Baela's hair and was now staring at Jace in horror. Aegon grinned at her and raised his hands defensively as if he were innocence personified. He sat back down in his seat.

"Jace," Baela admonished and Alyssa also looked at her stepbrother and shook her head. "He's not worth it, Jace." She put a hand on his arm before walking back to her seat. It was only then that she realized how tense Aemond was. How angry he was at Jace. Her fiancé also stood up as Alyssa approached him. She looked at him questioningly, but Aemond ignored her.

Everyone present looked back and forth between Jace and Aemond in irritation. Alyssa didn't quite know what to do. She tugged at Aemond's sleeve, trying to force him to sit back down.

He looked down at her, but stayed where he was.

Jace playfully punched Aegon on the shoulder before raising his mug. He grinned at Aegon and then at Aemond. "To prince Aegon and Prince Aemond. We have not seen each other in years, but I have fond memories of our shared youth. And as men, I hope we may yet be friends and allies. To you and your family's good health, dear uncles."

The cups were raised and Alyssa breathed a sigh of relief when Aegon said "To you as well" and left it at that.

Only Aemond continued to stand, scowling at his nephew.

"Aemond," Alyssa whispered softly, tugging on his sleeve again. "Sit down, please. No drama tonight, I beg you."

He looked down at her. Suddenly there was something like warmth in his eyes and he nodded. He sat down again but grabbed Alyssa's hand and held her tight. Was that the price of not going after Jace? If so, Alyssa was happy to pay it.

Then Helaena got up beside her. "I would like to toast to Baela and Rhaena. They will be married soon. It isn't so bad. Mostly he just ignores you except sometimes when he's drunk."

Alyssa looked at her cousin in astonishment but couldn't help but laugh. "Well that's a great prospect for married life, who doesn't look forward to it," she murmured.

She felt Aemond squeeze her hand and looked at her. "Ours will not be like that." She hadn't expected such words, but she didn't know what to say in reply either.

"And a toast to my dear cousin, Alyssa. You're finally becoming part of the family and my sister."

Alyssa looked at Helaena and a lump formed in her throat. She stood up, letting go of Aemond's hand and hugging her friend. "Thank you," she whispered in Helaena's ear.

They broke apart and Alyssa met Alicent's gaze. She had a hand on her heart and was smiling at the two girls. Tears glistened in her eyes.

Alyssa smiled at the queen and sat back down, but didn't let go of Helaena's hand. Maybe being Aemond's wife wouldn't be so bad. At least that way she would be able to spend time with Helaena again and with Alicent.

"Let us have some music", the king demanded and immediately the musicians began to play.

Her cousin had managed to lighten the mood in the room, even though it probably wasn't Helaena's intention. Nevertheless, her friendly and kind-hearted manner manages to make everything better.

The music was upbeat and exuberant, and Alyssa felt her tension slowly release. Perhaps the evening would not turn out to be as disastrous as she had feared. Everyone present still had their limbs and no one was seriously offended. She prayed it would stay that way.

Jace got up and came around the table. He asked Helaena to dance, who looked surprised but accepted the offer. Alyssa found her stepbrother's gesture very kind, as she doubted Aegon would ask his wife to dance, and her cousin deserved some frolic and joy. Jace was just a gentelman through and through.

"Why are you grinning like that?" Aemond then asked softly. Alyssa hadn't noticed him scooting closer to her.

"I love to see Helaena happy."

"Hmm," Aemond agreed and she saw him eyeing your sister and his nephew suspiciously.

"And I'm glad he didn't ask me to dance."

Aemond whirled on her, one eyebrow raised. "How come?"

"Dancing is not one of my strengths."

"But fighting on the Stepstones does? Can you tell me what you were thinking?"

Alyssa looked at him confused. "What do you mean by that?"

"Do I have to tell you how dangerous this is?"

Alyssa chuckled. "Be careful Aemond, otherwise one could assume that you are worried about me."

"Because maybe I am. You're way too inconsiderate sometimes."

Alyssa's eyes narrowed at his words. "Don't pretend you know me. You know absolutely nothing about me."

Aemond looked at her, shaking his head. "It may be years since we met, but you're still the same, Alyssa. I know you, probably better than anyone in this room."

She clutched the fabric of the dress and clenched her teeth. He shouldn't say that. He wasn't allowed to say that.

Aemond sighed when he saw her tense posture. "It's time we moved on. I may not know all facets of you anymore, but I should get to know her as your fiancé."

Alyssa raised an eyebrow. "Oh, should you? Here's the first lesson: I hate being patronized. How I spend my free time, whether fighting on the Stepstones or dancing naked in the gardens, is none of your business."

Aemond looked at her, blinking in confusion. But then the corners of his mouth turned up. "Dancing naked in the gardens? Is that some kind of fetish?"

Alyssa's cheeks flushed and she bit her lower lip. "That was just an example. I don't dance naked through any gardens."

"That would have surprised me too. Or is that the reason why you don't want to dance now? Is the dress in your way?"

Her face got even hotter if possible and she swallowed hard. "You know very well that I didn't mean it like that."

Aemond looked amused and Alyssa couldn't remember the last time she saw him like that. Certainly not since her arrival. "So if I asked you to dance, would you--?"

"Say no? I just told you that dancing is not one of my strengths. I will hardly do it voluntarily. Especially not with you."

Aemond leaned forward further, his fingers trailing over the rim of his mug. "And why not with me? I'm your fiancé, by the time we get married we'll have to dance together."

Alyssa's expression hardened. "I'm planning on getting a strain or a sprained ankle by then that will prevent any dancing, so don't worry."

Aemond chuckled. "I missed your fire."

"Do not say that."

"Why not?"

"Just don't do it. We may be engaged, but things are certainly not going well between us, Aemond. And I'm not going to pretend otherwise." She just couldn't. Not when she thought of all the pain and tears she'd had because of him. It would be a betrayal  to herself to just forgive him or act like nothing happened.

The smile faded from Aemond's face and he nodded haltingly. "Understand."

"Good." She wanted to get along with him, for her own sake and for a halfway happy future, but she wouldn't make it easy for him. Not if he didn't do anything to earn it.

Aemond's grip on the mug tightened and a hard pull was around his mouth.

"Dance with us, Aly," came Helaena's voice and she waved her cousin over.

Alyssa forced a smile. "No, I'd rather not do that."

"Come on, Alyssa. You can't always shy away from any dance," Jace teased.

How she hated him in that moment. She sighed heavily. "Would you believe me if I said I had a sprained foot?" she asked her stepbrother.

"No, I wouldn't, so come here."

"Hmm, that's a pity. Then I guess I have no other choice." She rose, ran her fingers down her dress, and joined Jace and Helaena. They both offered her a hand, which Alyssa took. She hated dancing. Even if it resembled a sword fight in some way, she didn't like the strange sequence of steps. She lacked the steel in her hands.

For a brief moment, Alyssa enjoyed the company of her entire family, she even enjoyed dancing with Jace and Helaena, even though she was clumsy and had even stepped on Jace's foot twice. She always acted like it was on purpose. Most of the time she felt Aemond's eyes on her, but she couldn't tell what kind of looks they were. Jealousy? Grudge? Fury?

But then the king was taken back to his chambers. He didn't look well, exhausted and weak. 

The happy mood was cut short when Aemond jumped up, slammed his fist on the table and raised his mug. Alyssa looked at him startled. His violent reaction was unexpected.

„Final tribute," Aemond began and Alyssa suspected that this speech would not end well. The music stopped and Alyssa, Jace and Helaena finished their dance. All eyes in the room were on Aemond, who was staring down at Luke.

"To the health of my nephews: Jace," Aemond looked at Jace, his gaze gliding briefly to Alyssa who was standing close to her stepbrother. A frown spread across Aemond's face, but that was nothing to the cold anger as he averted his gaze and looked at Luke. "Luke and Joffrey."

Alyssa didn't know what Aemond was up to or why he was doing what he was doing, but automatically she moved closer to him. Aemond's sudden anger had to have a reason and she knew why when she saw the pig lying on the table in front of him. She looked over at Luke, then back at Aemond. She remembered all too well the situation six years ago when Aemond had been teased by his brother and nephews.

"Each of them handsome, wise.." Aemond cocked his head as if trying to think about his words. 

Don't say it, please don't say it, thought Alyssa's mind. But their wishes were not answered.

"Strong," Aemond finished. Alyssa closed her eyes and shook her head. So much for no drama tonight.

"Aemond," the queen said warningly, but her son ignored her.

"Come, let us drain our cups to these three strong boys."

Aegon chuckled and immediately raised his mug. While Alyssa approached Aemond and gave him a warning look. "What's that about?" she hissed at him.

Jace was immediately behind Alyssa, she could feel the anger emanating from him. "I dare you say that again." Alyssa put a hand on Jace's chest and put her hand back.

Aemond squinted at the gesture. "Why? 'Twas only a compliment. Do you not think yourself strong?" Aemond asked provocatively and Alyssa stared at him in horror. Why did he have to say that? Why today? Why in front of all these people?

Aemond stepped towards Jace and Alyssa immediately blocked his path, but she heard the angry growl of Jace behind her, who now rushed towards Aemond. Aemond pulled Alyssa aside and Jace's fist immediately hit his face.

Alyssa cried out in horror. "Jace! Stop this instant!"

Luke got up as well, going to help an older brother, but he was grabbed by Aegon, who slammed his face into the table with full force.

Aemond hardly seemed to feel his nephew's punch, he laughed and stepped towards Jace and shoved him to the ground with a single hand.

Alyssa turned to Ageon and pulled him away from Luke. "Find someone in your regards, Ageon." She stood between Aegon and Luke, knowing that the younger didn't stand a chance against Aegon. Not that Jace could hold his own against Aemond, but the two men were still far enough apart.

That was when the guards stepped in. But the boys were already in a rage, Jace scrambled to his feet and made to charge at Aemond again, but Alyssa stood in his way.

"Stop it, everyone! It's enough now! Six years have passed and nothing has changed, that's incredible!" With a sad expression on her face, she shook her head and looked at each of the four boys. "Pull yourself together, dammit." 

Luke wiped his face with his hand and looked at her blankly. "He called us-"

"I heard what he said, Luke,“ Alyssa interrupted him immediately.  „We all have. Get over it." 

Luke's eyes widened in surprise. "Get over it? I can't believe you're still defending him."

"I had just defended you! Or do I need to remind you of pulling Aegon away from you?"

Luke glared at her and shook his head. "But-"

„No buts, Luke."

Aegon laughed beside her. "Are you attached to Alyssa's skirts now, little one?"

She spun on Aegon and glared at her cousin angrily. "I said enough, Aegon. Just shut up. And you two," she looked at Jace and Aemond. "Sit back down and behave like the princes you are." They all acted like spoiled little brats, not like princes, and certainly not like grown men. It was just ridiculous!

Jace lifted his chin and stared at Aemond. "Not until Aemond has taken back his words."

Aemond chuckled. "And why should I do that, nephew?"

"Aemond," Alyssa said warningly. "Enough is enough."

They stared at each other, then he looked away but nodded.

"No," Jace said through clenched teeth. "He can't say that without consequences."

"Jace, let it be." It wasn't like he could challenge Aemond to single combat to restore his honor. Aemond had told the truth and nothing would change that. It wasn't wise of him, let alone appropriate, that's be true.

"You're on his side, after all this time, you're still taking his side." Alyssa looked at Luke who glared at her angrily. "No matter what he does or says, you stand by him. I don't understand it. Even after what he said to you back then. And now you will marry him.“ 

"Luke," Alyssa said in a warning tone.

But Luke had already talked himself into a rage, he was filled with anger, incomprehension and probably also shame. "He drove you away with his words and yet you're defending him."

The queen intervened and looked from one to the other. "What does he mean? What words were said?" Her gaze found Alyssa's, then the queen looked at her son. She wanted an explanation.

Alyssa looked away from the queen and looked at Luke instead. Her hands clenched into fists. „Nothing, Luke didn't want to say anything.."

He glared at her, she could see that he was considering his next words or actions. But his anger won. "Aemond called Alyssa a bastard and a whore on the day he lost his eye."

Silence. Suddenly there was an oppressive silence in the room.

"He.. what?" The horror was visible on Alicent's face and she stared from Alyssa to her son. Disbelief, disappointment, incomprehension. All of this was visible on the Queen's face.

Luke laughed bitterly. "Then he wished her dead."

Alyssa's face went pale. She felt all eyes in the room on her. None of the adults had known what had happened back then on Driftmark. What mean words Aemond had said to her. Now they knew.

"It's good not to be the disappointing son for once." Aegon looked at his brother, a sad grin spread across his face.

Alicent could only stare at her son, she was stunned. That was not how she had raised Aemond. She had never believed that he had thrown those things at Alyssa. She believed that things had been said or done in the childish skirmish that had divided them. But she hadn't expected this. These were not words for harmless banter.

"And now this little piece of shit is going to marry her, I can't believe it," Daemon muttered angrily.

A dangerous silence fell over the room and Alyssa didn't know what to do. Run, run, run. A voice in her head seemed to urge her to just storm out of the room. Just like she had done back then. Running away and not facing up to what happened. But she was no longer a little girl who just ran away. She was a grown woman now. So she arched her back and lifted her chin.

"What's done is done. And he was right. My mother was a whore,  so I'm a bastard. Let's put it aside." She pressed her fingernails into the palms of her hands. Left crescent-shaped imprints there. She looked up and met Alicent's eyes. The queen looked at her sadly, Alyssa could even see tears in the older woman's eyes. Alyssa gave her a smile. "It's okay. It's been a long time."

An angry cry erupted. "Then it's okay that he wished you dead?"

Alyssa sighed heavily. "No, Luke, it's not. But unlike you, I don't make a scene. You want to be the next Lord of the Tides, then act like it.“

Jace stepped forward. "You agreed to marry him, Alyssa. It's not okay for him to talk to you like that." 

"We all have our responsibilities, Jace. Let it go."

"No, I won't," Jace closed the distance between them and placed a hand on her forearm.

Before Alyssa could react,  she was pulled away from Jace. She met with a hard chest and looked up at Aemond in astonishment. He had one arm wrapped around her waist as if to protect her from Jace.

"Touch her again and next time I'll make sure you don't get up again, Lord Strong.“

Jace and Aemond glared at each other angrily. Alyssa broke free of Aemond's grip and took a step away from him. "Aemond will learn to fulfill his duties as well. And I call it irony that he will now marry a bastard and a whore's daughter. Perhaps this is his punishment for the things he said." Alyssa looked at Aemond, who met her gaze. He looked like she had slapped him in the face. 

Then she looked at Aegon, who grabbed his mug and downed the contents. Baela and Rhaena stood on the other side of the room, clinging to each other. Daemon now stood between Jace and Aemond, stopping them from attacking each other again. Princess Rhaenyra stood behind her husband, hand cupped protectively over the curve of her stomach.

"I'm afraid this dinner is over. With your permission, Your Majesty, I would retire now." She would not forget who she was. How to behave in the presence of the Queen. Aemond and Jace might have forgotten that, as did Aegon and Luke. But not her.

Alicent looked at her wide-eyed, coming around the table toward her. "Alyssa-" There was concern in her eyes, compassion. But Alyssa didn't want any of it. "I'm fine. It's been a long day and I'd like to go to bed, if you'll allow me."

Alicent looked like she wanted to contradict her. As if wanting to straighten out the situation and set things right about what her son had done or said, the queen forced a smile and nodded. "Of course, child. Rest and sleep well. We'll talk tomorrow."

Alyssa nodded, but she knew she wouldn't want to discuss the subject with the Queen tomorrow either. She had always suspected that Aemond hadn't told his mother any details. That Alicent didn't know what really happened back then. And who should have told her? Aegon and Helaena hadn't been there. Only Aemond could have told her the truth, but didn't.

"Good night, my queen," Alyssa said stiffly, turning away. She found herself eye to eye with Aemond looking at her.

He towered over her, but she saw concern in his eyes. Saw the regret.

Say something, she wanted to yell at him. Finally apologize!

But Aemond did nothing.

"Who's the coward here?" she asked him sadly, walking past him.

"Alyssa", she heard his voice, but she didn't turn around.

___________________________

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[apricia]

For ever by your side / Aemond Targaryen x reader // Part X

Chapter 10 - Loose tongues, empty promises 

The next day was the Driftmark Succession Hearing. Aemond promised himself an entertaining spectacle, which would result in Lord Vaemond Velaryon becoming the new Lord of the Tides and little Lord Strong finally being seen for what he was: a bastard.

This exit would be exactly to his liking.

Little Luke would probably burst into tears in the great hall at being robbed of his inheritance, hanging by his mother's skirts and swearing at how terribly unfair the world was. Aemond grinned. That bastard deserved nothing less. Not after taking his eye.

The hall was already full. He stood in front, next to his siblings. His mother was speaking to his grandfather, who would lead the petition and also make the decision. The decision was made long ago. Otto Hightower would give Vaemond Velaryon Driftmark. A new ally for the Greens.

"I hope this matter will be resolved quickly. I'm already exhausted," Aegon complained next to him and yawned.

Aemond gave his brother a reproachful look. He probably should give Aegon credit for even being out of bed at this early hour. Let alone bathed, dressed and halfway sober.

As so often, Aegon's and Aemond's desires were not the same. Aemond was sure that Aegon would also enjoy a good show. It would be a welcome change at court.

Aemond's gaze swept over the onlookers present. Positioned in front of the throne on the right was Vaemond Velaryon. Behind him stood Princess Rhaenys Targaryen and her granddaughter Baela Velaryon. Yet they stood apart from Lord Vaemond, as if they were not on his side.

On the left, the team had gathered around his half-sister. The black haired Strong boys stood behind the adults with their cousin Rhaena and whispered. They all looked nervous. Especially little Luke. He looked like a fawn among wolves. Or like a goat among dragons.

Rhaenyra was rubbing the bulge of her stomach, his uncle standing behind her. Daemon looked bored, but kept looking at the door.

As if he were still waiting for someone. And Aemond knew who, too, because the person he craved the most wasn't there yet. Alyssa was nowhere to be seen and Aemond found himself getting restless. He'd been happy to see her again, even though he'd only seen her last night. He wanted to ask her how she liked the book. Absolutely certain that she had already started reading yesterday. And he wanted to ask her what his fool of a brother had said to her just before she left the room. 

Otto Hightower stepped forward and cleared his throat. At that moment, Alyssa darted through the door. Aemond was drawn to the sight of her, like he would know instantly when she was in the room and couldn't help but follow her eyes.

Today she wore a simple red dress with black embroidery on the sleeves and neckline. She wore her hair in a simple braid. You wouldn't have guessed from her clothes that she was a princess, but she was still the most beautiful woman in the room. By far. Aemond stared at her. She stood next to her father, who exchanged a few words with her. Daemon Targaryen seemed less than pleased with his daughter's lateness.

Alyssa just shrugged and stood next to her sister Rhaena. Then she looked up and immediately found Aemond's eye. They looked at each other. Unabashed.

Alyssa raised an eyebrow as if to silently ask him what he wanted from her.

Aemond's mouth twitched. Everything, he would have liked to have answered her. He wanted everything from her. Anything she could give him.

Alyssa gave him a challenging look one last time before looking away and looking at the king's hand instead.

"Though its the great hope of this court that Lord Corlys Velaryon survive his wounds, we gather here with the grim task of dealing with the succession of driftmark. As hand i speak with the king's voice in this and all other matters." With these words Otto Hightower sat down on the Iron Throne.

Aemond looked at his grandfather silently. Aemond looked at his grandfather silently. The King's Hand was enjoying all this far too much. He spoke on his father's behalf that Aemond did not laugh. Otto Hightower had always spoken only on his own behalf, for his own benefit and that of his family. Just like he would do now. 

As if the throne were his own, his grandfather makes himself comfortable there. "The crown will now hear the petitions. Ser Vaemond of House Velaryon." 

Ser Vaemond stepped forward, dressed in the colors of his house. He bowed his head humbly to Alicent. "My queen," then he turned to Otto. "My lord hand. The history of our noble houss extend beyond the seven kingdoms to the days of old valyria. For as long as house targaryen has ruled the skies, house velaryon has ruled the seas. With the doom fell on valyria our houses became "The last of their kind. Our forebearers came to this new land, knowing that were they to fail, it would mean the end to their bloodlines and their name. I have spend my entire life on driftmark defending my brother's seat. I am Lord Corlys's." Closest kin, his own blood. The true, unimpeachable blood of House Velaryon runs through my veins."

"As it does in my sons, the offspring of the Laenor Velaryon," Princess Rhaenyra interrupted.

Aemond looked at his older half sister. She couldn't really try to keep up this lie after all these years. Did she think everyone present was blind, like his father? He might only have one eye left, but it was obvious that the princess's sons looked neither Targaryen nor Velaryon. They look like Ser Harwin Strong. If the knight were still alive and present, everyone could see the resemblance and the proof that his sister was unfaithful would be visible to all. But present or not, Luke and Jace were bastards, sons of the House of Strong. And with that, they had no right to either Driftmark or the Iron Throne.

"If you cared so much about your house's blood, Ser Vaemond, you would not be so bold as to supplant its rightful heir. No, you only speak for yourself and for your own ambition."

"You will have chance to make your own petition, Princess Rhaenyra. Do Ser Vaemond the courtesy of allowing his to be heard."

With a wide grin, Ser Vaemond spun around to face the princess. "I hold House Targaryen in high esteem, Princess. I fought side by side with your new husband, as well as your late husband, my nephew Ser Laenor. We defended the Stepstones together. Both our houses still fight side by side to this day. My brother was injured in the fighting on the Stepstones, but first the bond between our houses was reforged at the hands of Princess Alyssa, who joins forces with Vermithor to aid House Velaryon in battle.“

At those words, Aemond snapped his head at Alyssa. You fought on the Stepstones? Had she gone mad? Did she want to be killed?

Alyssa looked blankly at Ser Vaemond, then at her father, who shook his head. He didn't seem to know how his daughter was spending her time. That she was putting herself in danger. But Daemon didn't seem to mind this new insight. A grin appeared on his face and he gripped the hilt of his sword tighter.

Just the thought of Alyssa being part of the bloody and brutal battles on the Stepstones made Aemond cramp. She could have been dead already. Without him knowing about it. She could have been killed in battle and he wouldn't have been there to protect her. For years he had trained to one day have her by his side, to defend her against her enemies, but here stood Alyssa, fighting from the back of her dragon while he trained in the palace's training yard. He clenched his hands into fists.

Alyssa had been willing to take risks since she was a child. She had been fierce, determined, and ready to fight. Had always defended him and fought his battles. But those times were over. He wouldn't let her put herself in danger any longer. At least not when he wasn't with her to protect her from others and her own recklessness.

"As much as I appreciate the bond between our houses, but what do you know of velaryon blood, princess?" Ser Veamond continued. A knowing smile on his lips.

"I could cut my veins and show it to you, and you still wouldn't recognize it."

The corners of Aemond's mouth twitched in amusement at the knight's words. Finally someone was telling the truth. Even if it was stupid to make such allusions in front of the assembled court. He looked at Alyssa, who was glaring at Ser Vaemond as if she wanted to slit him open herself to spill the precious Velaryon blood. His fiery princess.

"This is about the future and survival of my house, not yours." Vaemond eyed the dark-haired princes. Dislike was in his eyes. The same dislike that Aemond viewed his nephews with. Vaemond was the second son of driftmark and loyal to his house, but now his inheritance would be stolen from him by a little boy who wasn't even a true Velaryon. Luke stole Vaemond's birthright while stealing Aemond's eye. So he could understand the resentment the knight felt for the bastard.

"My Queen, my Lord Hand, this is a matter of blood, not ambition. I place the continuation of the survival of my house and my line above all. I humbly put myself before you as my brothers successor. The Lord of driftmark, the lord of the tides."

Aemond never thought he could identify with the words of Ser Vaemond so well. He too was the second son who had no inheritance to expect but did everything for his house and his family. But unlike Vaemond Velaryon, Aemond would get what he deserved.

"Thank you, Ser Vaemond," Otto Hightower dismissed the knight.

Aemond looked expectantly at his sister. How would she undermine Ser Vaemond's demands? The lord had hinted at what everyone in this room already knew. Would his sister lie again and claim that her three sons were Ser Laenor's descendants?

"Princess Rhaenyra, you may now speak for your son, Lucerys Velaryon," said the king's hand. 

Rhaenyra stepped forward. She seemed annoyed and tired of it. "If I am to grace this farce with some answer, I will start by reminding the court that nearly 20 years ago, in this very-"

She fell silent as the heavy doors to the hall were opened. Aemond's eyes also wandered to his father, who was accompanied by two king's guards. "King Viserys of House Targaryen, the first of his name, king of the Andals, and the Rhoynar, and the first men. Lord of the Seven Kingdoms, and Protector of the Realm."

Aemond grimaced at the sight of his father. He was no longer a king, no protector as the title claimed. His father was now sick and old and frail. He barely made it out of bed, let alone to the meetings of the small council. Aemond didn't remember the last time he spoke to his father.

Using his cane, King Viserys made his way out to the throne, succeeding Otto Hightower, who looked anything but enthusiastic. When the king was present, he alone decided who would inherit the title of Lord of the Tides. And Viserys Targaryen would always speak for his daughter and her illegitimate sons. Aemond clenched his fists. Aemond looked at Alyssa, who was staring at the king, startled. Disbelief and concern were on her face and she had a hand over her mouth. She looked at Viserys and shook her head. She probably hadn't known about his ill condition. Aemond's heart ached at the sight of her. He knew she liked Viserys. He took her in and made her what she is today. Thanks to him she was a princess.

He wished he could go to her and pull her into his arms. That he could give her comfort, but he wasn't allowed to. She probably wouldn't accept it anyway. He had wanted to apologize to her yesterday, finally wanted to clear things up between them. When he was so close to her in the library, he'd finally wanted to put it right. But then Jace showed up and spoiled everything.

Aemond barely paid attention to his father's words as he listened to what Princess Rhaenys had to say and as they discussed the engagement between Rhaenyra's sons and Lady Laena's daughters. He wasn't particularly interested in his cousins, although he would be interested to know if Alyssa had befriended them over the years. Had the two girls become her new confidants? Had Alyssa filled the space at her side with her sisters?

As Aemond expected, Princess Rhaenys spoke in Luke's favor and King Viserys supported Luke's claim to driftmark and named him the next Lord of the Tides.

But what he didn't expect was that Ser Vaemond would step forward. "You break law and centuries of tradition to instull your daughter as heir. Yet you dare to tell me how deserves to inherit the name Velaryon. No, I will now allow it."

Aemond raised an eyebrow in surprise. Perhaps this gathering would be entertaining after all.

"Allow it?" the king asked confused. "Don't forget yourself, Vaemond."

Vaemond spun angrily at Rhaenyra and her children. "That is no true Velaryon." Aemond enjoyed how Luke flinched at the Lord's words and stepped closer to his mother. Like a little child. "And certainly no nephew of mine."

There they were, the words Aemond had hoped for. The truth, plain for all to hear.

"Go to your chambers," the princess instructed her son, then turned to Ser Vaemond. "You have said enough.“

"Lucerys is ma trueborn grandson and you no more than the second son of driftmark."

Aemond took his father's words personally. He too was no more than a second son. He might be a king's son, but this king didn't give a damn about him.

"You... may run your house as you see fit, but you will not decide the future of mine.  You allow your brother to whore around and father illegitimate children who you then legitimize and raise to the status of a princess“, Vaemond harsh words hit Aemond. He stared at the knight with disgust in his eyes. He didn't care if he insulted Rhaenyra or her sons, but if he said another word about Alyssa, Aemond would cut out his tongue and feed him to Vhagar.

But Ser Vaemond had spoken out in a rage. "You allow your daughter to behave unnaturally and break the marriage bond. My house survive the Dom and a thousand tribulations besides. And the gods be damned I will not see it ended on the account of this… „

„Say it“, Daemon provoked him and Aemond saw Alyssa step closer to her father and shake her head warningly.

Aemond had always admired his uncle when he heard about his success in battle and his audacity. He hated him for what he had done to Alyssa, but Aemond saw a real Targaryen in Daemon, he wouldn't deny that.

They had just insulted his daughter, himself and his wife. Had it been otherwise, had these things been said to Aemond and his family, Ser Vaemond would have been reduced to ashes.

For a brief moment there was absolute silence in the room and Aemond already believed that it was over and Ser Vaemond accepted his failure. But the man was dumber than Aemond had thought.

"Her children are bastards," Ser Vaemond shouted across the hall. Some members of the court flinched, others gasped and widened their eyes. "And she is a whore." 

Aemond looked at Alyssa, she had flinched at the last word and he saw her swallow. She had both arms wrapped around her and looked strangely lost. A stab went through his heart. Even after all these years, that word still bothered her. A word he had thrown at her. She opened her eyes and immediately found Aemond's gaze. He thought he could see tears in it, but he couldn't say for sure, she was too far away from him for that. Alyssa met his gaze, but there wasn't the familiar fire in her eyes. She averted her eyes far too quickly in embarrassment. She had the same look on her face as she had six years ago when he had called her names. Aemond felt like the little boy again who had hurt his best friend and pushed her away forever. Alyssa might be in the same room as him, but she was miles away.

His thoughts were interrupted when his father struggled to his feet and drew the dagger on his belt. "I will have your tongue for that."

But that didn't happen anymore. Screams rang out as Daemon Targaryen cut off Ser Vaemond's head.

Startled, Aemond backed away, grabbing his own sword and pulling his sister behind him in the same movement. Helaena had her hands over her ears and looked disturbed.

When he lifted his head and looked at Alyssa to make sure she was alright, he saw that she just shook her head. She didn't seem startled, disgusted or surprised. As if she had already expected such behavior from her father.

"He can keep his tongue."

The assembled knights in the hall drew their swords and charged at Daemon, his grandfather demanded that he be disarmed, but his uncle just wiped the blood off his sword and sheathed it as if nothing had happened.

Aemond stared at his uncle. He almost applauded. For his harsh words and the pain Vaemond had inflicted on Alyssa, he wanted to kill the cunt himself. Daemon had believed him, and Aemond couldn't tell he was mourning the man. Maybe Daemon had finally learned to stand up for his family.

Murmurs grew louder as the king groaned in pain. Aemond wasn't paying attention to his father, however, but continued to look at Alyssa. He saw the concern on her face. She used to worry about him, but not anymore. Wanted her to be there for him. Just like in the past.

The king refused any painkillers, but allowed the guards to take him out. "I will be expecting my brother, wife, son and niece in my private chambers. There are matters that need to be discussed."

Surprised, Aemond raised an eyebrow and exchanged a confused look with Aegon. His brother shrugged oblivious.

"Who are you talking about, my husband?" Alicent demanded, equally confused.

"From Princess Alyssa and Prince Aemond. You will come to my chambers in a moment, no arguments."

Aemond felt his body tense. He had not been in his father's chambers for a long time, and now he was summoned there. He looked at Alyssa who was already staring at him. Confusion was visible in her eyes, but when she saw that Aemond was also looking at her, she lifted her chin defiantly and left the room.

A grin spread across his face. No matter what his father wanted, he would have the opportunity to be close to her and that was all that mattered.

"What do you think he wants from us?" Alyssa asked Daemon as they walked towards the king's chambers.

"I have no idea. I don't like the presence of the queen and her idiot son."

Aemond was no idiot, but Alyssa didn't contradict the prince. She didn't want to defend Aemond, not in front of Daemon.

"I never thought he was in such bad shape. It was horrifying to see him like that." Alyssa fiddled with her sleeve. King Viserys had always been a little sickly, but not like this. Not like today, when he looked more dead than alive.

"It surprised me too. The Queen has kept us in the dark about his condition." Daemon looked angry, and Alyssa knew his anger was aimed at the queen, but she frowned.

"Have you inquired about his health? Have you written to your brother over the past few years? Have you inquired about him, as you have inquired about me all these years ago?“

She doubted that. So she didn't think it was fair that Daemon was now blaming Alicent. The queen was not to blame for the king's condition. On the contrary, she devotedly took care of him, you could clearly see that today. But Daemon hadn't been a caring brother. He hadn't given a fuck about Viserys for the last few years.

Daemon glared at her. "You know very well that we were otherwise occupied."

"Writing a letter to your brother takes five minutes. You could have taken the time if you really cared, so don't blame the queen for your ignorance now. Blame yourself, you and yours lack of concern."

Alyssa glared at the prince before the doors to the king's bedchamber were opened for them. 

She deeply regretted that she had hardly written to her uncle. A few letters had been exchanged between them, but only on occasions such as name days or special celebrations. Alyssa blamed herself for not being there for her uncle. 

"Prince Daemon of House Targaryen, Prince Consort to Crown Princess Rhaenyra Targaryen and Ruler of Dragonstone, and his daughter Princess Alyssa Targaryen," a servant announced them.

Alyssa immediately saw the miniature replica of Valyria her uncle had been working on for years. Thick layers of dust lay on the small houses. How long had he not been able to work on them?

Her uncle lay in his bed, two maesters around him, handing him tea. There was still no sign of the Queen and her son. Alyssa took her time and approached the king's bedside.

"My king," she greeted Viserys and curtsied.

The king groaned in pain, but raised a hand when a maester offered him a cup of tea. "I need a clear head."

"Alyssa, my dear niece," the king ground out and reached out his hand to her. Alyssa grabbed it. His hand felt cold. And paper-thin, like his fingers would snap from too much pressure, like they'd melt between her fingers like sand.

"You look well, a true Targaryan princess. A beautiful young woman."

Alyssa smiled. "Thank you, my king."

"You used to call me uncle."

"You are still my uncle, Your Majesty. I will call you what you please."

Viserys laughed, but his laughter gave way to a cough and then a groan. "Then call me uncle."

"As you wish."

The doors opened and Alicent and Aemond entered the room. Behind them walked Otto Hightower, the King's Hand, who was not invited to this conversation.

"Otto, it seems to me I didn't hear your name in the king's enumeration before," said Daemon, staring at the lord darkly.

"Prince Daemon, how good to see you again."

"I'd rather never see you again. Or better yet, at your own funeral."

"Daemon," Alyssa hissed, glaring at the prince admonishingly.

"Otto may stay", groaned the king and grabbed his forehead.

"My dear, please finally take something for the pain"; Alicent begged her husband, stepping over to the bed beside him.

Aemond stood in the middle of the room, waiting. His eyes were on Alyssa, but she refused to look at him.

"Maesters, give His Majesty some Milk of the Poppy," demanded the Queen.

"No, not until I've set things right," Viserys disagreed.

"What is the matter you wanted to discuss, my king?" Otto asked interested and looked from Daemon to the king.

Alyssa got up and stood next to Daemon. On the other side of the bed were Alicent and Otto. Aemond hadn't joined them. He stood at the foot of the bed. But his gaze kept gliding to Alyssa.

She, too, was curious to know why Viserys had called this meeting.

"It's been a long time since this family lived together peacefully. I miss that time."

Alyssa frowned. Had there ever been such a time? She had been happy here once, yes. But the whole family together.. no, there had always been tensions and conflicts. Always starting from the princess and the queen, egged on by Otto and Daemon.

"I have not forgotten the day we recorded Alyssa. I remember it clearly. I always knew that one day she would be part of the family."

Alyssa tensed at the words. As if she wasn't already a part of his family, after all she was his niece and connected to the king by blood.

Alyssa is breathing heavily, she had a bad feeling. Her gaze darted to Aemond, who was watching his father with wary eyes.

King Viserys coughed and immediately Alicent was at his side. "I wish for a marriage between Alyssa and Aemond."

Alyssa held her breath. Her blood rushed through her veins and she felt like she couldn't breathe. What just happened here?

She looked over at Aemond, who looked just as amazed as she did. But he quickly got his facial expression under control and looked at her. There was a silent question in his eyes. Alyssa didn't know the answer to that.

"No way," Daemon said while Alicent clapped her hands happily. "That's an excellent idea, my love."

"No, Alicent. Under no circumstances will any of my daughters marry any of your sons. Did you hear me?“ Daemon took a step towards the bed, his hand on the hilt of his sword. "She fled from you and your kin years ago, remember? I doubt she would want to return now."

Why did Daemon talk about her as if she wasn't there? And why didn't Alyssa say anything about it herself? She felt a lump in her throat that prevented her from speaking. She couldn't find words for what was going on inside her.

Alicent glared at her brother-in-law. "No, I haven't forgotten that. It was the first time you even realized she was your daughter. It was the day you took her from me."

Alyssa closed her eyes and wished herself far away. She felt like she was a little kid again, scared and insignificant. Someone was making decisions over her head that she couldn't do anything about.

Viserys groaned and immediately the banter between the queen and the prince ceased. "Stop fighting. I will not force anyone into a marriage. I want my son and niece to consent to this marriage of their own free will.“

Daemon laughed. "Why would Alyssa agree to that, brother? What's in it for her?"

Visery's eyes wandered to Alyssa, who stood frozen. "She loved him once, Daemon.“ At the king's words, Alyssa's head jerked towards Aemond. He stared at her. Embarrassed, Alyssa averted her gaze and looked at the floor. “They had such a strong bond. A bond that should never be broken. No matter what happened, they must work this out. For the good of our family."

Alyssa felt the tears in her eyes, felt a weight settle on her heart.

"Leave," said the king, and everyone looked at him in confusion. "I want to talk to my niece alone."

Alyssa swallowed and bit her lower lip. Would he ask her to marry Aemond even if she didn't want to?

Alicent smiled at Alyssa, put a hand on Aemond's shoulder and walked into the next room with him and her father. Daemon stared from his daughter to his brother, shaking his head but walking away.

"You have nothing to say, child?"

Alyssa swallowed, trying to find her voice again. "What should I say to that?"

"Is that what you want? I remember you asked me to do it once."

She remembered it. It was her ninth name day and Viserys had asked her what she wished for. "Aemond," she had answered her uncle. "I want Aemond."

"And what else?"

"Nothing. Just him."

A lot had changed since then. She was no longer a little girl with naive desires. Those were the words of an innocent child who was now grown.

"You have nothing to say, child?"

Alyssa swallowed, trying to find her voice again. "What should I say to that?"

"Is that what you want? I remember you asked me to do it once."

She remembered it. It was her ninth name day and Viserys had asked her what she wished for. "Aemond," she had answered her uncle. "I want Aemond."

"And what else?"

"Nothing. Just him."

A lot had changed since then. She was no longer a little girl with naive desires. Those were the words of an innocent child who was now grown.

"But I don't love him," Alyssa whispered through tears in her voice. It tasted like an ugly lie on her tongue. "And he certainly doesn't love me."

"You are wrong, child. You loved each other before you knew what love was. You will learn to love each other again."

"Then the decision is made? Without me having a say?"

Viserys gasped and coughed heavily. Alyssa handed him his tea and waited for the king to calm down. "I said I won't force you into this marriage. But do this favor to this old man who wants his son and niece to be happy."

"Is that my king's wish?" Alyssa asked in a low voice.

"No, it is your uncle's wish, who loves you dearly.“

Alyssa looked at Viserys, he looked so frail that she was afraid he was going to die at any moment. He asked her something for the first time ever in Alyssa's life. The king took her in when she was a baby. Gave her food and drink, a roof over her head and clean clothes. He had given her a family. That was so much more than Alyssa could ever give him back.

"Do you really think we'll be happy together? After everything that's happened?"

Viserys patted her hand. "Yes."

Alyssa bit her lower lip. "Then I will comply with your request, uncle."

"Thank you, Alyssa. At least that way I know one of my children will have a happy marriage."

Alyssa wasn't so sure, but she didn't contradict the king. Instead, she got up and took a few steps away from the bed.

Just what had she done? She agreed to marry Aemond? That was the last thing she had hoped for from her trip to King's Landing.

As Alyssa got up, the others rejoined them. Alyssa felt their questioning looks on her and looked away.

"The princess has agreed. She will be the wife of my son Prince Aemond.“

„Excellent“, said Otto. Triumph crossed his face. „The marriage should be within this week in the Light of the Seven."

"No," Alyssa cut him off sharply.

"No?" Otto asked with a raised eyebrow. "I thought you made your decision, Princess."

Alyssa swallowed hard. "I did. But we are Targaryens. We are the blood of old Valyria. I will not marry under the Light of the Seven, but according to ancient Valyrian tradition. I will marry Aemond this way or not at all, My Lord Hand. The choice is yours."

Otto looked at Aemond. He in turn only looked at Alyssa and nodded. "Whatever my bride desires."

It was the first time she looked at him since they were certain they were getting married. His feelings could not be seen, he skillfully hid them behind a mask. When they looked at each other, however, she saw him frown. He couldn't understand why she had agreed to this. But he didn't seem snubbed or disgusted by the engagement.

Alyssa glared at him and stepped towards him. They were so close to each other that the others couldn't hear her words. "Don't think that this is done out of affection. I'm doing it because my king requires it of me. And what your bride desires is something totally else."

Aemond narrowed his eyes but leaned in and planted a kiss on her cheek, as was expected of him. "You could have declined the offer. What did my father say to you?"

"That's none of your business. I've complied with my uncle's wishes, that's all you need to know."

Aemond looked at her silently, but nodded. He had one hand on her waist, the other behind his back. "Then it looks like our oath will come true after all. Syt mirre ondoso aōha paktot."

Alyssa froze at those words. For ever by your side. She could clearly feel Aemond's hand on her waist. Like if he was setting her skin on fire. She shook her head. "Just stop grinning, Aemond. Syt mirre ondosa aōha paktot... those words mean nothing to me anymore."

His eyes narrowed and the pressure of his fingers on her waist increased. "ȳdra daor ivestragon bona." 

"Why shouldn't I say that? It's the truth."

"Issi pōnta drēje?" He wanted to know if she was really telling the truth.

Alyssa lifted her chin. "Hen rhinka issi," she confirmed. They were true. Somehow at least. She hadn't forgotten her oath, but it had lost its meaning. Not just for her, but for both of them. He had left her as she had left him.

"Nyke ȳdra daor pāsagon ao“, he wispered. His lips were right over her ear and she felt the warmth of his breath.

"I don't care if you believe me or not. Jiōragon hen hen issa ñuhoso", he should go out of her way, she was done with him. She put her hands on his chest and pushed him away. But Aemond didn't move. He was still standing right in front of her looking down at her.

"Dīnagon!" Alyssa demanded. He should move. Alyssa let out a frustrated sigh. "If I have to spend the rest of my life with you, at least until the wedding I have the freedom to avoid you. So move!"

Aemond clenched his jaw and stepped aside. "Īlon should ȳdragon nūmāzma bona."

She had always loved it when he spoke to her in high Valyrian, but right now Alyssa wanted to punch him in the face with every word.

"Yes, we should talk. But not now. I've had enough of you for now."

She stormed out of the room. She didn't care that she hadn't been formally dismissed or that she hadn't said goodbye to her king and queen. She even heard Alicent calling her name, but Alyssa ignored it. Alyssa needed time to herself to think about her new engagement.

But she didn't get very far when she heard footsteps behind her.

"Alyssa, stop!“ Daemon grabbed her upper arm and forced her to stop. He looked her in the face, but Alyssa looked away. „If you don't want this marriage, just say a word and I'll end it all."

How exactly did he want to prevent this marriage? By taking her back to Dragonstone and imprisoning her there? By ignoring his brother and his wishes? Or by killing Aemond?

Neither was an option that Alyssa wanted. She stopped, clenched her hands into fists and took a deep breath. "I'll tell you what I told you many years ago: I know what loyalty means, what responsibility means. My king has asked me for something and I will comply with his wishes."

Daemon narrowed his eyes and put a hand on her shoulder. "It has nothing to do with loyalty and responsibility."

Alyssa shook off his hand. A laugh escaped her. "Yes it did. I will not run from my duties like you did."

"You don't know what it's like to be stuck in a loveless marriage. Do you really want to go through this for the wishes of a dying man? My brother wouldn't want you to be miserable like I was with Rhae."

Alyssa hadn't known Daemon's first wife and knew absolutely nothing about her. Still, she didn't think Lady Rhae was at fault. Her father took what he wanted. And just because he didn't wanted Rhae, his wife had suffered. She also didn't want to be trapped in a loveless or unhappy marriage, actually she hadn't wanted to get married anymore. But she couldn't refuse Visery's request. She owed him everything. It was the least she could do for him. She glared at Daemon. "I don't think your brother wanted you to fuck his daughter either, and yet you do it. Let this marriage be my concern, understood?"

Daemon laughed hard at her words and shook his head. "Alyssa, you don't know what you're getting yourself into."

"Maybe, but it's my decision."

It was a decision that would either break her heart forever or fix it.

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[apricia]

For ever by your side / Aemond Targaryen x reader // Part IX

A/N: I'm sorry, something doesn't seem to be working properly with tagging. I put your names in - I'm happy about anyone who wants to be on the taglist, by the way - but Tumblr doesn't always seem to set the links. So if you're not being tagged, I'm sorry, that's not on purpose! It's either me, or tumblr hates me...or both. 

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Chapter 9 - Old habits

After Helaena got her kids ready and wanted to play with them, Alyssa had spent some time with her. She had asked several times who or what Helaena had meant by blue, but her cousin could not remember her cryptic words. Still, Alyssa couldn't get them out of her head. She had changed and then decided to explore the keep. With the new decoration, the many idols of the seven and the stars, she hardly recognized her former home. As a descendant of Valyria, she did not believe in the Seven, but in the old Valyrian gods. As did all who bore the Targaryen name.

Dressed in a simple cream colored dress and her hair loose, now plaited and flowing in waves down her back, Alyssa paced the corridors of the palace. Whether she wanted it or not, her feet carried her towards the library as if by themselves.

As she reached the library's heavy doors, two maesters came out to meet her. They recognized the princess and nodded politely. Alyssa smiled at them before entering the library, closing the doors behind her.

The familiar smell of the books reached her and Alyssa closed her eyes, leaning against the door and letting her head fall against the heavy wood. Memories made their way into her mind, but Alyssa pushed them away.

She had come to love the library on Dragonstone, but this had been her true sanctuary. This was her kingdom. Hers and Aemond's.

Alysa pushed off the door and walked down the myriad rows of shelves. She reached out and ran her hand over the spines of the books. Felt the familiar leather beneath her fingertips. How she had missed this place.

In the last six years there must have been a few books that Alyssa hadn't read about. She would borrow some and read them in her room. Right in front of the fireplace with a mug of wine. That sounded like the perfect evening activity. 

Alyssa pulled a book she didn't recognize from the shelf and read the title. Dust came at her and she blew it away.

"You're just wasting your time with this," a voice said and Alyssa cried out in shock. She spun around to the voice and saw Aemond sitting at one of the tables, his legs crossed and a book in his lap. He looked over at her in amusement.

"So startling all of a sudden?"

Alyssa cleared her throat, put the book back and looked at him with her arms crossed over her chest. "I didn't expect you to be hanging around in the shadows like a pervert."

Aemond raised an eyebrow at her words, the corner of his mouth twitching. "If you want to learn about perverts or if you're looking to talk to one, I'm afraid you're dealing with the wrong brother."

He knew about his brother's preferences, thought Alyssa. Aemond knew exactly what his brother was doing at night and where he was going. She showed no emotion at his statement but turned back to the shelf.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Aemond put down his book and stand up. He walked right over to her. But Alyssa pretended not to see him.

She scanned the titles of the books as if searching for something specific.

"Do you need help with your search? Or with choosing the right reading material?"

"Do I look like I need your help?"

"You look lost, yes."

Alyssa rolled her eyes and turned to him. "I'm quite capable of finding a book on my own, Aemond. Thanks for your offer, but I don't need your help."

He looked at her silently, then leaned forward. Alyssa held her breath. What was he up to?

Aemond was standing directly in front of her while Alyssa stood with her back to the shelf. He towered over her, one hand resting on the shelf at head height, his face just inches from her. 

She had also gotten so close to him in their fight. He had even touched her face then, cupped her throat and a small part of Alyssa wished he would do the same now.

She could feel his breath on her face. She stared at him wide-eyed, feeling her heart beating way too fast in her chest. The way the hair on the back of her neck stood up and her cheeks grew hot. Aemond, on the other hand, seemed anything but nervous. As if he were calm itself. He didn't take his eye off her. Eyed her expectantly as if testing her.

"What you are doing-?"

As he leaned in even further, Alyssa thought he was going to kiss her. And she didn't know whether to let that happen or whether to smack him in the face. Her mind went crazy.

But Aemond just reached into the shelf next to her and pulled out a book. "Here, you might like this. It's about Princess Visenya and her successes in battle."

Alyssa stared at him. Then to the book he held out to her. She saw the grin on his face and felt like slapping herself. He played with her. And she allowed that.

Alyssa swallowed hard, feeling herself blush. And she felt a strange warmth in her stomach at the amused sight of Aemond.

At that moment she hated him from the bottom of her heart.

"Are you all right, Alyssa? You look a bit feverish. Shall I send for a Maester?"

Alyssa slowly shook her head and snatched the book from his hand. "I'm doing great, don't worry about a bastard like me. I'm sure princes have better things to do," she hissed at him and left.

His hand shot out and clutched her forearm. A hard train was now around his mouth. "Don't leave."

"Why not? I thought the presence of a whore would disturb the noble prince."

Aemond stared down at her. "You are not a whore."

"But my mother was, as you pointed out to me yourself, in case you don't remember."

The grip on her upper arm tightened and she saw Aemond's nostrils flare. He was angry, although he had no reason for it. She was the one allowed to be angry.

"I remember," he admitted quietly. "But-"

"But what?" she asked in an urgent voice. Was today the day when Aemond Targaryen would apologize to her? After six long years?

His jaw tightened and Aemond closed his eyes for a moment. "I thought we could put this behind us," he whispered.

"Leave it behind? How is that going to work, Aemond? Tell me." 

How could she forget his words and what had happened when it still haunted her dreams?

Aemond looked at her stonily. "Alyssa, I-"

"Here you are," Jace's voice sounded, and Alyssa snapped out of Aemond's grasp.

Jace looked at the two of them with a raised eyebrow. "Is everything all right here?"

"What should be wrong, nephew? My cousin and I just chat. We share the same interests, if you remember. But books and knowledge were never your specialty, were they? You used to tease other kids."

"Leave him alone, Aemond," Alyssa hissed at him.

She clutched the book to her chest to calm her pounding heart. Her eyes were still on Aemond, who met her gaze.

"You used to defend me with that imperious voice. It's strange that you're using it against me now."

Alyssa took a step back in surprise at his words. Aemond sounded... yeah what? Sad?

"Then give me no reason to"; she whispered.

Jace cleared his throat and they both spun around to face him. He looked at her impatiently. "Dinner is already over, but you want me to come get you in case you want to eat something else." He spoke to Alyssa, that was for sure.

Alyssa wasn't hungry. She just wanted to go back to her room and take a look at the book Aemond had given her. He had impeccable taste in books and Alyssa was curious if she would actually like the book like he had said.

"We'll be right there," Aemond said, however, holding out his arm to Alyssa.

As a lady, it was impolite to refuse the arm of a lord - or in this case, a prince. Aemond knew that, Alyssa knew that. She sighed and put her hand on his arm.

"Actually, I'm not hungry," she complained.

"You need to eat. You're way too skinny," Aemond said though, looking down at her.

Alyssa did the same. She wasn't too skinny. She was spot on. She had curves in all the right places and the rest of her body was toned. He was the first man to tell her she was too skinny.

Alyssa wrinkled her nose. "Are you going to compliment me any more?" she ground out through clenched teeth.

"Maybe."

She grunted.

"Maybe I'll compliment you more if we continue our fight. Wouldn't you like to wipe the grin off my face?" He grinned mischievously at her.

Alyssa wanted nothing more than that, but the sight of his face and his words made Alyssa think of other things she would like to do. She swallowed hard and turned her head away.

"Don't challenge me."

"Hm," was all Aemond said to that. But that one note sounded like his favorite pastime was challenging Alyssa.

The three of them entered the dining room. Jace glared at Aemond's arm holding Alyssa. However, only Aegon and Luke were still present in the room. Everyone else was probably already in bed. Luke scowled at his oldest uncle, his hand clutching the knife.

Aegon, on the other hand, was just filling up his wine glass. When he saw his brother, nephew and cousin enter the room, he lowered the cup.

He stared at Alyssa. Then a hard laugh escaped him.

"Of course she appears here as a true beauty. Like a goddess of old valyria. Her mother was a whore and I doubt Uncle Daemon would have fucked an ugly whore."

The room went dangerously quiet. Alyssa stared at Aegon, seeing the drunkenness in his eyes. He had already looked far too deep into the wine.

Beside her, Jace took a step toward Aegon, but she held him back. She pulled away from Aemond and tried to calm Jace down. She didn't need Jace's help to hold her own against Aegon. A grin appeared on her face, then she laughed softly.

"I'm sure you know this all too well, Aegon. Is there a whore in King’s Landing that you haven't fucked yet?"

Aegon's eyes widened, she  heard Luke and Jace chuckling. Without meaning to, she looked to Aemond, who frowned at her. But she saw the corner of his mouth twitch in amusement.

Aegon stared at her, then a wide grin crept onto his face.He stood up, wine dripping from his mug onto the floor, and he slowly sauntered over to Alyssa.

Cup in hand, he gestured at her. "Are you offering yourself, cousin?"

At the words she felt Aemond tense next to her. He didn't seem to like his brother's words, which Alyssa found surprising.

Alyssa cocked her head as if considering the offer. "I used to share everything with Helaena, but no, I don't want to touch anything that has made its way through every bed in King's Landing. And beyond.“

Aegon took another step towards her. Only centimeters separated them and Alyssa could feel her cousin's breath on her face. He tasted of wine. So also feel the tension emanating from Luke, Jace, and Aemond. Luke had stood up and hurried to his brother's side. Jace looked at Alyssa nervously. Probably unsure whether he should intervene or whether he should let her clarify the situation.

Aemond clenched his jaws and glared at his brother. Each of them was about to intervene, but Alyssa couldn't tell whose side they would be on. Of course Luke and Jace would try to defend her, but she could not say what Aemond would do. Would he side with his Brother? Alyssa think so. 

"You know, Alyssa, I'm not the only one in this room who's had experience with whores. And the pleasure they give you.“ Aegon leaned forward, his mouth directly over her ear. Alyssa didn't know if the others could hear his words, but she knew his words were meant only for her. „Ask my little brother how good the whores in the street of silk really are. He'll tell you."

Alyssas heart stops. As if Aegon new which buttom he had to bush, he mock her even more. "You won't be his first, dear cousin. But if you ask nicely, he'll be happy to be yours. But I'm also happy to make myself available."

Cold spread through Alyssa. She didn't know why. Aegon's words awakened something in her that she had been trying to forget for years.

Her thoughts brought her back to a time when Alyssa had been a different person. Where she had lived happily in King's Landing. Right before the attack on her and Helaena. Just a few weeks before.

Aemond hadn't turned up for their meeting at the library, so Alyssa decided to look for him. She found him in his chambers, but he hadn't answered her knock.

He was sitting on his balcony, his head on his knees, staring out at the city.

"What happened?" Alyssa wanted to know. She could see that something had happened, which annoyed him.

He looked up at her, his cheeks flushed and he quickly looked away.

Alyssa raised an eyebrow in surprise. "Give me a name and I'll beat them up myself."

The corners of Aemond's mouth twitched and he looked back at her. "Shouldn't it be the other way around? I beat up those who have wronged you."

Alyssa shrugged. "You would do that for me if I asked you to. Wouldn't you?"

Aemond just nodded. Of cource he would.

"But since I'm not the one sitting in her room sulking, I'll probably give the spanking today."

Aemond made a face. "I'm not sulking."

Alyssa just raised an eyebrow and Aemond sighed.

"It's because of Aegon..."

"Because of who else."

She didn't know why Aegon had to constantly tease his younger brother. As if it were his favorite pastime in the whole world. She liked Aegon, also understood the pressure he was under. Alicent and Otto saw him as the rightful heir to the throne, even though King Viserys chose his firstborn daughter as heir and Aegon  has no interest in being king.

"What did he do this time?"

"I... he," Aemond couldn't seem to find the right words and blush spread across his cheeks again. Was he embarrassed by this conversation?

"Now spit it out, or do I have to run to Aegon and squeeze it out of him?"

Aemond glared at her. "No, you don't have to." He took a deep breath, as if preparing himself for the upcoming conversation.

"I saw him kissing a maid."

Alyssa raised her eyebrows in disbelief. "And?" Aegon was three years older than her and Alyssa had often caught him making eyes at ladies-in-waiting and maids and even touching them. She didn't understand Aemond's problem.

"When I interrupted him, he asked me if I didn't want it too."

Alyssa just looked at him confused. "What do you mean ?"

"He asked if I didn't want to kiss the girl too."

Alyssa's eyes widened and she looked at Aemond in horror. Did he said yes? Had he kissed that servant?

Aemond looked at her, but looked away again. "I didn't want to and he teased me that I probably didn't even know how to kiss someone."

"And do you know?"

Aemond looked at her again and Alyssa cleared her throat. She felt her cheeks turn red. "Do you know how to kiss?"

Alyssa hadn't expected such a conversation when she decided to go find Aemond.

Her cousin shook his head in embarrassment. "That made it worse because Aegon was right. I don't know how to do it. How to kiss someone."

Alyssa's hands got sweaty. She couldn't tell Aemond how to kiss someone properly because she had never been kissed herself. Still, she could help him.

"Then practice it," she suggested, sitting down next to him.

An angry look crossed Aemond's face. "How exactly do you imagine that? Should I run to the nearest girl and ask her if I can kiss her? Definitely not."

Alyssa snorted. Just thinking about Aemond walking through the halls of the palace kissing all the servants made her angry. Her hands clenched into fists.

"You're not supposed to practice with anyone, Aemond. Practice on me."

His eyes widened in surprise and he stared at Alyssa.

"What?"

"I said practice on me. Kiss me."

Aemond's eyes traveled from Alyssa's eyes to her mouth and back again. Then he shook his head. "I can not."

"And why not?"

Didn't he find her pretty enough? Alyssa's heart clenched at the thought.

"You're a princess, Alyssa. I can't just kiss you. It's not proper."

"And you're a prince, Aemond. I'd say we're quitt.“

His gaze went to her mouth again and he licked his lips. Just the sight of it made Alyssa's throat dry. She didn't know what she was getting into, but if Aemond wanted to practice kissing, then she should be the one he was practicing with.

Aemond leaned forward and Alyssa caught her breath. Then she felt his mouth on hers.

It was... weird. She didn't know what a kiss should feel like, but she felt like she was doing something wrong.

Aemond pulled away from her far too quickly and stared at her.

"And?" he asked quietly.

Alyssa could only stare at him in return and shrugged. "I do not know."

A disappointed look crossed Aemond's face and Alyssa immediately regretted her choice of words. She hadn't meant to hurt him, but she didn't know what else to do either.

She put her hand on his cheek. Gently ran her finger over his skin. Then she leaned forward, closed her eyes and pressed her lips to his. For the blink of an eye, the world around them seemed to stand still, for Aemond didn't move. Then he kissed back. Maybe that was what had just gone wrong. Because Alyssa had just stood still and let the kiss wash over her. Too nervous to even respond. But now it was different.

Aemond's lips on hers felt right. It felt good kissing him, like she was meant for it.

As they parted, Alyssa cleared her throat and ran a hand through her hair. "I think you know how to do it now."

Aemond just stared at her, nodded haltingly. His gaze went back to her lips.

It had been her first kiss. Little did Alyssa know until this moment that she wanted that her first kiss belonged to Aemond. But after that she was sure that every of her first should all belong to him. Just like his should be hers.

How naive she had been then. Alyssa wanted to laugh at herself for being that stupid. Aemond fucked whores in the street of silk? What if? Why did she care?

She just stared blankly at Aegon, tried to keep her posture and then just turn around and leave the room. But she couldn't help, turn around one last time and look at Aemond. He watched her wordlessly. His eye was scowling as he looked from Aegon to her and back again. As if he knew that his brother had just told her something that she hadn't wanted to know and that concerned himself.

She had been his first kiss, just as he had been hers.Then why did her heart ache so much now just knowing they wouldn't have any other firsts together? She had known that. She'd known it the moment she'd decided to leave him.

The fact that she was facing him again after all these years probably just confused her feelings. It had to be.

She felt absolutely nothing for Aemond Targaryen anymore. She didn't care about him. End of discussion. Alyssa now only had to make sure that her body and especially her heart saw that as well.

___________________________

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[apricia]

For ever by your side / Aemond Targaryen x reader // Part VIII

Chapter 8 - A queen's punishment, a mother's love

"You didn't have to defend us, Alyssa. We're men, we can do it ourselves," Luke said grimly.

Alyssa looked amused to him. "I have seen that."

"I'm serious."

Alyssa doubted that Luke and Jace stood a chance against Aemond together. She had watched the fight between him and Ser Criston. Her comment about his lack of footwork had been a lie. He was a fantastic fighter.

"Luke, I have no doubt that you would stand your ground against Aemond." Just not in a duel. Since Aemond would always beat Luke. "I didn't intervene because I doubted you or thought you were a child. I did it because I wanted to."

"Because you wanted to provoke Aemond," Jace added, laughing.

"And do you think I succeeded?" she asked innocently.

The two brothers laughed. "Definitely."

"Good," Alyssa said contentedly, but her smile faded at the thought of her former best friend.

"Do you think you could defeat him?" Luke asked, but Alyssa was lost in her thoughts.

She hadn't expected Aemond to become a man. She was aware that six years had passed since she had last seen him. But not that the little boy would grow into such a man. In such a handsome man. And where did he get those muscles from? At first, Alyssa could have only stare at him in disbelief. Couldn't believe the man with the impressive cheekbones, broad shoulders and strong build was Aemond. As a child he had been cute. Especially when he was embarrassed and his cheeks had turned pink. Alyssa had loved that face on him. 

But Aemond had lost everything childlike. Instead of describing him as cute, she had to admit that Aemond was beyond attractive. He probably made all women's hearts beat faster. At least hers had done it. She hadn't thought he would grow like that either. As children, they had been almost the same height. Now he towered over her. Alyssa came just up to his chin. She had to look up at him. And him just looking at her made her knees go weak. And the least thing she wanted to admit was that she found the eye patch incredibly attractive. She made him look dangerous, mysterious even.

"Alyssa?" Luke asked, nudging her with his elbow.

"What?" She looked at him in surprise, hadn't noticed that he had spoken to her. She felt her face grow hot. She had thought improperly of Aemond. By the gods, what was wrong with her?

"I asked if you think you can win against him? In a sword fight?"

Stunned, she looked from Jace to Luke. Then she laughed. "Are you crazy? You guys saw the same fight as me, didn't you? He would definitely beat me," although she hated to admit it.

"But you said-"

"Everything I said, I just said to annoy Aemond, Luke. Daemon taught me how to fight, yes, and I'll swear I'd win against a lot of men when it came down to it. But not against Aemond." He was taller than her, stronger than her, and Alyssa had seen the way he moved in battle. How he wielded the sword. It had been like a dance. Beautiful for the eyes.

Daemon had always trained Alyssa to play out her strengths. Her speed and agility. Always attack first to surprise the enemy. Never go into an open duel, because she would probably lose. 

Aemond was taught otherwise. In the battles fought by the prince, she would always lose. Admittedly, she wouldn't make it easy for him and she would land some hits, but in the end she would lose. Alyssa didn't overestimate her abilities, that would be foolish and reckless. And she was neither.

However, unlike Aemond, she was able to strike without being seen. Attack without giving her victim any time to defend. As a woman, small and petite, she had no other choice.

"Too bad, I'd like to see you throw him down," Luke said dryly.

Alyssa grinned. "Believe me, me too. Maybe we can bribe Daemon to wipe the grin off Aemond's face. He could defeat him."

"In fact, knowing the prince, he would do that,“ said Jace, laughing. "But not here, not like this."

"Not even if we disguise it as a training match?" Alyssa would enjoy watching Daemon defeat Aemond. With Aemond on the ground, hopefully she wouldn't think of admiring his cheekbones or his broad shoulders. Most delightful shoulders. Alyssa shook her head. Now she was starting those childish crushes again. That couldn't be true! What was wrong with her? Were her emotions running wild as she approached her monthly period? It had to be. She was emotionally unstable, hadn't drunk enough today and hadn't seen a man who wasn't Jace, Luke, or Daemon in too long. She wasn't used to the presence of strange men, that was the only reason why her body was now reacting so strongly.

"Shall we escort you to your room?" Jace asked.

But Alyssa shook her head and held up the black box. "I still have something to do."

"What is it this time?" Luke wanted to know tentatively. "You always leave without a word."

Alyssa looked at him and nodded. "And nothing will change that. But this time I'll make an exception and tell you where I'm going: I'll pay my respects to Princess Helaena."

"Why?"

"Because she's my cousin and I missed her a lot."

Luke raised an eyebrow in disbelief. "You'll see her tomorrow."

He didn't understand. Had never accepted or respected the close bond Alyssa had formed with Helaena and especially with Aemond. In his eyes, all of Queen Alicent's children were mean and devious. Helaena was the exact opposite of that.

"Last week was her name day," Alyssa explained her actions. Alyssa always associated a lot with Helaena's name day. That day her life had changed. She had gone from a common whore's daughter to a princess of the realm. She would never forget that. She had been legitimized by her uncle and taken in by the queen as if she were her own daughter. Alyssa felt her throat tighten at the thought of Alicent. They hadn't seen each other for so long. Would Alicent hold a grudge against Alyssa now? Because she left and didn't get in touch? After the marriage offer, no more ravens had come from King's Landing. At least none that included messages for Alyssa. Alyssa prayed that Alicent wasn't angry or hurt. She wouldn't be able to bear that.

Alyssa was afraid of meeting the queen and at the same time she wanted to run into Alicent's arms. She was divided. It would remain to be seen how Alicent would react to her.

She separated from the Velaryon boys and rushed to Helaena's chambers. They were directly across from Prince Aegon's and Alyssa assumed that Helaena's children had also been housed nearby. She was still in her riding gear and wouldn't bother to change now. Helaena wouldn't care what Alyssa was wearing. And she probably wouldn't meet anyone else. The queen was probably greeting Princess Rhaenyra at that moment or was with the king. And from what Alyssa knew about Aegon, the prince was probably still in bed, sleeping off his intoxication from the previous night. Aegon and wine were now best friends and inseparable.He probably wouldn't even notice if Alyssa just stormed his room and jumped on the bed.

When she had last met him in the streets of Fleabottom, she had been startled. Not only was Aegon loitering around - she would have expected his presence on the street of silk - but he was there unprotected, unescorted, and unveiled. Drunk and werlor. To be honest, seeing Aegon like this almost brought Alyssa to tears. He had looked like a broken man. As if he didn't care if he was robbed or even killed. It had been stupid to help him, but Alyssa couldn't help it. When two men molested him, she made short work of them and escorted Aegon to the keep gates. Or better yet, hauled him there. He was heavier than he looked and it had taken all of Alyssa's strength to get him there. She hoped it was just a one-time trip, but she knew better. Mysaria had told her that Aegon was often in Fleabottom. Not only because of his special preferences, but also because he looked at things that Alyssa didn't even want to name. Shameful things that should be forbidden. 

Alyssa had reached the corridor where the princess' chambers were and already stopped mid-movement. 

„Get up“, screamed the queen and Alyssa flinched at the harsh tone.

The door to the prince's chambers stood open and no knight or maid stood before it.

"Mother? What is it? “ Aegon asked in a sleepy voice.

"What is it? What is it? What is it?" The Queen's voice grew louder and angrier. "That's all you can say for yourself?"

„Did something happened?“, asked Aegon. 

Alyssa didn't know what it was about, but she clearly heard Alicent's anger. Would she soon feel this anger too? She wanted to turn around and leave, but she couldn't. Frozen when she heard the Queen's voice after so many years. Though she sounded annoyed, Alyssa soaked up Alicent's voice like a sponge.

Alyssa didn't understand what Aegon was saying, it sounded like he was mumbling into a pillow. 

"Dyana," said the Queen.

Who was Dyana? Alyssa could hear no reply from Aegon.

"The serving girl."

Still no answer from the prince.

"Oh, for gods sake. The girl, Aegon. The one you sent fleeing from your company."

Alyssa's eyes widened in shock. The queen wasn't implying that Aegon--- No, that couldn't be.

"It was just harmless fun," Aegon murmured, not a bit guilty or ashamed. "She didn't need to go and get upset about it."

Fun? Alyssa knew that Aegon's definition of fun had included teasing his younger brother whenever he felt like it. What had he done to that poor girl?

"Think of the shame on your wife, on me." Alicent's voice broke. It sounded like a mixture of anger, frustration and disappointment. "How can you keep carrying on like this, especially on a day like today?" The Queen's voice had grown louder again, anger now dominating.

"Why? What is it today?", Aegon wanted to know and Alyssa also wondered what was so special about today. Did the queen mean Rhaenyra's arrival at court?

There was a clapping sound and Alyssa flinched at the sound. Alicent hit her son. Or at least that's what it had sounded like. 

Alyssa didn't know what to make of that. But on the other hand, she didn't know what bad thing Aegon had done either. It had to be bad or Alicent would never have reacted like this. Alyssa was absolutely sure of that.

Silence fell before Alyssa heard the Queen's whispered words. "You are no son of mine."

At the words, Alyssa covered her mouth with a hand. They were harsh words, bad words. A mother could hardly say anything worse to her child. Just what had Aegon done to make Alicent react like that?

Footsteps sounded and Alyssa's heart beat faster. Was the queen just leaving her son's room?

"I did not ask for this," Aegon then said. "I've done everything you've asked me to, and I try so ... I try so hard, but it will never be enough for you or father."

Alyssa closed her eyes. She should have turned around when she had the chance. This conversation was not meant for her ears.

But then the door to Helaena's room opened and the princess stepped into the hallway and walked towards the open door to Aegon's room. She hadn't noticed Alyssa, must have been lost in thought.

"Have you seen Dyana?" asked the princess. "She's supposed to dress the children."

Alyssa swallowed hard. That answered the question of who Dyana was. She was a maid and nanny to Aegon's offspring. And she was molested by Aegon. Or worse. Whatever the prince called 'fun'.

Footsteps sounded again and Alyssa gripped the box in her hands tighter. She would act as if she had never heard this conversation. It was none of her business what Aegon did to any maids and how his mother punished or held him accountable for it. That was none of her business.

Alyssa closed her eyes and bit her bottom lip until she tasted blood. She wanted to turn back, but it was too late for that.

"Alyssa," came the whisper of the queen. Alicent was standing in the hallway, one hand went to her mouth and her eyes widened. She was looking at her niece as if she were a ghost.

Alyssa pulled herself together, trying to block out what she had just heard. "My queen," said Alyssa, curtseying. It had been a long time since she had seen Alicent, but the queen hadn't changed. Alyssa wanted to say something, but Alicent was already there and pulled her into her arms. The Queen's familiar scent enveloped Alyssa, as did her warmth.

Alyssa was shocked. She hadn't expected such a greeting, not after all these years and not right after what she just heard. But Alicent hugged her like the queen was a drowning woman and Alyssa was the lifeboat.

She slowly put her arms around the queen and hugged her back.

"Finally you're home," the Queen whispered in her ear and Alyssa felt her eyes fill with tears. She closed her lids to keep them from streaming down her cheeks. Instead, she pressed her face against the queen's shoulder. Strengthened the hug.  She had missed Alicent. So much so that the sight of the queen almost broke her heart.

Laughing, Alicent broke away from her and put both hands on Alyssas face. Looked at her with love. "When did you arrive?"

"Just now. A lot has changed here, I could hardly find my way around."

"Yes, a lot has happened here.“ The queen nodded and smiled, but a deep crease appeared on her forehead. She cleared her throat. „Have you already met-?“ Alicent didn't have to finish the question, Alyssa knew what the queen wanted to ask her anyway.

"Yes, I met him in the yard." She saw the Queen's questioning look. "The prince is fine, we didn't kill each other in case you were afraid of that.“

Alicent raised an eyebrow. "I'm glad to hear that, but no, I didn't expect you to want to kill each other." There was an incomprehension in her eyes, as if the queen didn't understand how Alyssa even brought up this subject. Why should she have felt the urge to kill Aemond? Or he she? Alicent had rather suspected that her son wanted to do very different things with Alyssa.

Alicent wiped her cheek, wiping away a tear. "Now I have to welcome Princess Rhaenyra and Prince Daemon. We'll talk later, alright? I want to know what you've been up to in the past few years."

Alyssa nodded and smiled at the queen. "Of course."

When the queen left, Alyssa turned to her cousin who just came out of  Aegons chambers. "Hel," she said with a smile on her face.

Helaena looked at her, also smiling. "Aly."

The women fell into each other's arms. "It's been a long time," Helaena then said in a sad voice.

"Way too long," Alyssa confirmed, hugging her friend even tighter. "I brought you something. For your names day, even if it was last week.“

Heleana broke away from her. "Would you like to come with me? I have to get the children ready and I want to hear how you've been."

Alyssa nodded, looked at Aegon's room door again with a worried expression, but then followed the princess through a door on her right. Two small children were sitting on the floor, both still in their nightgowns. They were the spitting image of their parents. Silverwhite hair, light skin und violet eyes. 

Something in Alyssa tightened at the sight of the children. She was seventeen but still didn't feel ready to be a mother. But Helaena had already given birth to two. She didn't even want to imagine the pain. "I'm sorry I wasn't here for the birth. I should have been there for you during this time."

Helaena looked at her in surprise.  "The maesters were here, and mother."

But she wasn’t , and that annoyed Alyssa. She had failed Helaena. She had punished her friend for what Aemond had done. "I am sorry."

„Don’t be. I got your gifts and I was very happy about them.“

Alyssa had written to Helaena from time to time and sent her packages. She didn't break off contact with her friend entirely. She knew that Helaena had no one close to her in the keep. She had sent exotic insects from Bravos and Pentos, or book about that topic. Helaena had mostly been the reason for her trips there. She had wanted to support her cousin at least from a distance.

"Here," Alyssa said now and handed the black box to the princess.

Helaena opened it and looked at the scorpion moving inside. "Scorpions are loners. In extreme cases, they even eat each other. At night, on their foray, they devour everything they come across. If they don't find anything, they simply starve."

There they were again, facts only Helaena knew about these animals. A smile appeared on Alyssa's face. She had missed her friend.

Helaena raised her head, but her gaze was blank. Alyssa knew what was coming.

"Black and green, a dance with dragons, but her heart is blue."

Helaena's prophecies were the only thing Alyssa hadn't missed. They scared her and even now a cold shiver ran down her spine. She narrowed her eyes in confusion.

"Blue? To be honest, I expected a different color. Why blue?"

Helaena talked about Alyssa's heart. As if Alyssa is going to give it away any time soon. All of the house crests that featured the blue color flashed through Alyssa's mind. Arryn, maybe? Or rather Tully? Who was Helaena talking about?

"Her heart is blue," Helaena repeated her words.

"Blue? Really? Not a different color.. I don't know either, maybe green?" 

Green, of course, was just one example. Alyssa hadn't meant to insult anyone specific. Or at least she tried to tell herself so.

___________________________

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[apricia]

For ever by your side / Aemond Targaryen x reader // Part VII

Chapter 7 - Reunion with old friends

The wind whipped Alyssa's face as she flew towards King's Landing on Vermithor's back. Beside her flew Jace und Luke. Rhaena sat behind her on Vermithor. He was the only dragon that could easily carry two people and didn't mind if Alyssa invited a guest to fly. But Alyssa knew that her half-sister would rather have her own dragon than always have to fly with her.

Alyssa looked down at Luke skeptically. Arrax was still so small, just big enough for Luke to ride, and that didn't look too professional if you asked Alyssa. They flew in good conditions. The wind might be cold but not strong and the sun was shining. The perfect conditions for a flight on a dragon.

"Are we going straight to the dragon pit?" Jace asked her over the howling wind. Alyssa nodded to him. 

At the dragon pit, they would meet up with Daemon and Rhaenyra, who had their youngest children with them. They would then be taken to the red keep in a carriage.

But Alyssa would separate from the group first. She still had something to do.

Vermithor let out a roar and the younger dragons around him whined away from him in fear. Alyssa searched for the reason for Vermithor's reaction and spotted Vhagar on the shore of Blackwater Bay. She lay quietly on the beach and looked like she was sleeping.

Alyssa stared at the dragon. Vhagar was beautiful, tall and powerful. She was glad that Vhagar was down and not flying through the air with her rider. She didn't want to see Aemond again from the back of her dragon. She wanted to look presentable, well dressed and she wants to stun him. Just out of spite. 

The dragon pit looked exactly as Alyssa remembered it. Nothing had changed. She even ran into some of the dragon keepers. Those who recognized her smiled at her kindly. Alyssa climbed off Vermithor's back, leaving him in the capable hands of the dragonkeepers.

"Where are you going? The carriage is over there," Jace said, pointing to the vehicle.

Alyssa nodded. "I see that. I'll meet you later in the red keep."

"Alyssa, you can't just leave."

Alyssa raised an eyebrow. "Of course I can. Take a good look, Jace." She waved to her stepbrother before joining Rhaena, who had climbed down from Vermithor after her.

"Make sure these two don't get into trouble while I'm gone," she whispered to Rhaena. Rhaena had managed to charm the two Velaryon brothers, and Luke and Jace often listened to her opinions.

"Do I want to know where you're going, sister?"

"Probably not."

Rhaena sighed and grabbed Alyssa's forearm. "Please be careful. I always get worried sick when you just disappear like that."

Alyssa smiled at Rhaena. "I'm the older sister, Rhaena. I'm the one who should be worried about you, not the other way around. And your concern is unfounded. I know the streets of King's Landing and know which areas to avoid. I'll be back faster than you think. Also, I'm armed, so I won’t get in trouble.“

Rhaena seemed unconvinced, but nodded. "In that case, I'm glad father taught you how to fight."

Alyssa couldn't contradict her. Only thanks to Daemon's training did she feel ready for her illicit adventures. "Please hurry," Rhaena said before Alyssa set off.

Her destination was Fleabottom. It might seem strange that a Targaryen princess would visit a brothel in broad daylight, but Alyssa wasn't there for the whores.

She wasn't interested in this business. Even if she knew exactly what the women were doing here and how they earned their money. When Alyssa came here at night, she tried to ignore the naked bodies and the moans, although that was easier said than done. Sometimes she would have a cup of wine with one of the girls who wasn't busy. Regardless of what the girls were up to at night, they were all friendly and nice, and some of them were even extremely intelligent.

Alyssa had her cloak pulled low over her face to hide her silvery white hair. She didn't want anyone to recognize her. That would only raise unnecessary questions.

She knocked three times on a heavy wooden door and waited for it to be opened. A scowling man opened the door and gave her a silent look before letting her in. He already knew Alyssa and he knew that his mistress was waiting for her.

The man led Alyssa up a flight of stairs, and then onto a balcony. A beautiful dark haired woman sat on an inviting sofa with a mug of wine in hand. She looked up when she saw Alyssa.

"Princess, how nice to see you."

"Mysaria, or should I call you White Worm." Alyssa grinned at the woman. Mysaria returned Alyssa's grin. It had been years since Alyssa had met the woman who had once had an affair with Daemon and had been a friend of her late mother. Mysaria found out that Alyssa had gone to Dragonstone and sent her a message. She wanted to meet her and Alyssa, just thirteen years old, had been curious. She wanted to know more about her mother, wanted to know who the woman who gave birth to her was. Alyssa had sneaked out on Vermithor and flown to King's Landing. The journey was not easy, but she had managed to get to the named meeting point undetected and without any problems.

Since then, Alyssa has been visiting Mysaria more frequently, completing tasks for the White Worm that no one else could complete. Or wanted. Alyssa was a messenger of the White Worm. At least if it suited her. She brought messages to Pentos or Bravos when she was headed there anyway. In all other matters, Alyssa did not interfere. She did not read the letters Mysaria received or sent. She did not open the packages and was not interested in their contents.

Mysaria had offered her a position as a spy, but Alyssa had turned it down. She was a Targaryen, not a spy. She did not share family information with anyone. "Are you in the capital about the business with Lord Corlys?" Mysaria asked and Alyssa nodded. "There will be a hearing. Lord Vaemond has requested an audience with the king. As will Princess Rhaenyra audition for her son." It was not classified information that she shared with Mysaria. Soon everyone would know that Lord Corlys had been injured in battle and his successor would have to be settled. That was no secret. 

"I'm excited to see how this hearing goes."

Alyssa shrugged. She wasn't really interested in the outcome of this discussion. She would grant Luke the title of Lord of the Tides. Somehow at least. She understood Lord Vaemond's objection. After all, he was Lord Corly's younger brother and the only living male Velaryon. Because no matter what Rhaenyra or King Viserys might say, everyone knew that Luke, Jace and Joffrey were not Ser Laenor's children. Everyone knew that, only nobody was stupid enough to say it out loud.

"Did you get it?" Alyssa asked now. She didn't want to spend any more time in Fleabottom than necessary. Knowing that she was already expected and that Daemon would probably be furious that she left without a word.

Mysaria nodded and gestured to the man who had escorted Alyssa inside to get it."May I ask why you want a scorpion? Are you planning to poison someone?"

"If I were to do that, I would hardly leave any traces that can be traced back to me. No, the scorpion is a gift," said Alyssa, laughing.

Mysaria raised an eyebrow. "A gift? A most unusual gift if you ask me."

"As a matter of fact."

It was an unusual gift for an unusual girl. Woman, meanwhile. 

The man rejoined them and handed the white worm a small black box. "Why didn't you fly to Pentos and get one yourself?" Mysaria asked.

Alyssa shrugged. "I need a very specific kind and I knew you could source it. It was easier for me that way."

Besides, she had been too busy with matters on the Stepstones the past few days. 

Mysaria nodded in understanding and handed the box to Alyssa. Small holes were made in the lid to allow the animal to breathe inside. Alyssa didn't bother to check the contents. She could rely on Mysaria. So she dug the agreed-upon money out of her coat pocket and handed it to the older woman.

"I have to go now, but I'm sure we'll see each other again soon." Should she get bored at court, Alyssa would come back tonight.

"One more thing you should know, the prince recognized you on your last visit."

Alyssa held her breath. "Did he? I thought he was so drunk he didn't even know his own name."

Mysaria laughed softly. "I haven't checked, but it's possible. He did mention your name several times, Alyssa."

The princess nodded. Aegon would not pose a problem for them. He was a drunk and no one would believe him when he said he met Alyssa in Fleabottom.

"Why did you help him then?" the white worm asked curiously.

Alyssa didn't look at Mysaria but sighed. "He may be a drunken fool, but he's still my cousin. I will not allow anyone to harm my family."

"You could have been hurt," Mysaria insisted.

"He too. Only unlike Aegon I was able to defend myself. He was barely responsive when I found him."

"Yet he knew it was you."

"He'll think he imagined this encounter. Don't worry."

Mysaria smiled. "I never do that. Worries are for fools." The White Worm knew all things King's Landing, but especially Fleabottom. When a prince set foot on her turf, Mysaria knew it. And she knew how to use that information. 

"Then go, little bird. I'm sure that you are already expected in the palace." Alyssa said goodbye to Mysaria and left the brothel. With quick steps and unrecognized, she made her way into the red keep.

Aemond was at the training ground, sword in hand while Ser Criston wielded the morning star. It was his third fight this morning. First he had defeated Ser Erryk, then his twin brother, on whom he had vented his anger at Aegon. Aemond did not blame Ser Arryk for Aegon's missteps, but the knight was the prince's personal protector, and yet Aegon always managed to sneak out of the keep and indulge his deviant tendencies. As a Knight of the Kingsguard, Ser Arryk should be able to prevent that. 

Now he faced Ser Cristion, who was not as easy to defeat as the Twin Knights. He was more practiced, more brutal, and he knew Aemond's fighting style. As if he could predict his steps.

Onlookers stood around them as they did every day. Minor lords and ladies of the court whose names Aemond didn't even bother to remember. They were lucky to be allowed to stay at court, they couldn't expect any more favours, including the respect of a prince. Aemond didn't care about the crowd. When he held the sword in his hand, he blocked out everything around him. He could see everything around him when he wanted to, but his only focus was on his opponent and the steel in his hands. Although he had only one eye, he saw more than most people, heard more than most. He had trained to make up for his loss, to compensate for the limitation in his vision. It hadn't been easy, but now he moved and fought as if he still had both eyes.

As he threw a punch at Ser Criston, he heard the rushing through the crowd, heard the low whispers and shouts of encouragement. But his training company blocked the attack, instead the morning star sped through the air. Aemond heard the whirr of the weapon as it flew through the air and he dodged at the last moment. He certainly didn't want to be hit by that weapon.

Although his concentration was on Ser Criston, Aemond caught two dark haired heads joining the gaping crowd. Dark hair, like Ser Harwin Strong's hair. Proof of their illegitimate descent.

Aemond didn't look at his nephews, instead his focus slipped back to the fight. Just as the morning star met its shield. The wood shattered into many pieces and the splinters flew through the air.

He felt the impact of the weapon throughout his body. It didn't hurt, he had experienced worse, but anger was now running through his veins. He'd been distracted by the two bastards. That mustn't happen to him again. Aemond threw the shield away, useless now anyway. Armed only with his sword, he charged at Ser Criston. Crouched under the knight's slash and got into battle stance to plan his next attack. Sword raised and ready to stab.

He felt his nephews' eyes on him. Ser Cristion wiped his shirt sleeve across his face, where sweat was already dripping down. The student had overtaken the master. Aemond wasn't even out of breath.

When the knight charged again, Aemond dodged him. Twice. Three times, a fourth time. On the next swing, Aemond blocked the Morningstar, positioning himself behind Ser Criston and bringing the blade to his throat. Another victory.

Ser Criston seemed annoyed at his defeat, but he nodded to Aemond nonetheless.

"Well done, my Prince," he praised him. "You'll be winning tourneys in no time."

Aemond narrowed his eye. Did Criston seriously believe he was training so hard to win any tourneys? He wasn't a fool who cared about something so insignificant!

"I don't give a shit about tourneys," he ground out, blade still raised. Except it wasn't for Ser Criston. His sword and revenge were for others. His gaze slid to the two Velaryon bastards. “Nephews,” he greeted them. Have you come to train?"

Aemond prayed they would say yes. He would enjoy humiliating them as they had so often done to him. He would shove both of them in the dirt, over and over again, until he lost interest in their humiliation. If that ever happened.

Jace looked straight at him. He had grown. Not as tall as himself, but not the little boy he was six years ago. Luke, on the other hand, still looked like a frightened child. He stood behind his older brother and took another step back. They both looked nervous.

Aemond lowered his sword and took a step toward his nephews. "You can attack me at the same time if you like, that's what you're best at anyway. Once a coward, always a coward, it seems to me."

Luke and Jace exchanged an uncertain look and the older one shook his head. Aemond grinned. The bastards wouldn't dare challenge him, they wouldn't stand a chance against him anyway. Not anymore, even if they tried it together.

"They may be cowards, but you still act like a defiant child," came a voice from the crowd.

Aemond spun around. And there she was. Years had passed, years in which she had grown. The girl had become a woman. Her silvery white hair was longer than he remembered. She had braided it into an elaborate tail that hung over her shoulder and still reached almost to her waist. She wasn't dressed like a lady, no, she was dressed like a dragon rider. Black leather pants, black boots, an equally black vest with silver embroidery on the collar and hem. A three-headed dragon was embroidered on the front. Her clothes were wrapped tightly around her body and Aemond could see that her body has changed, she had become a woman.

She had one hand on her hips, the other holding a black box. Two daggers hung from her thigh and hip. She looked different, but there was a familiar fire in her eyes. Aemond recognized Alyssa immediately. He would have recognized her anywhere.

At the sight of her his heart beat faster. He hadn't expected to meet her here. She was standing in the middle of the crowd and was slowly walking towards them.

"Princess Alyssa," Ser Criston greeted her, bowing his head.

"Ser Criston, it seems to me, you are still trying to teach the prince swordsmanship. Not very successfully may I say.“

Crison looked from Alyssa to Aemond, the corner of his mouth twitching. "The prince is an excellent student and has become as good as his master."

Alyssa raised an eyebrow. "Then it's probably your fault that his footwork is lacking. Is that what you're saying?"

Aemond raised an eyebrow. He knew Alyssa's fire, her taunts, her provocations. She had always spoken to Aegon or the bastards that way whenever one of them had teased him. But Aemond didn't know that tone when she addressed him. She had never spoken to him like this before. He didn't know if he liked that. But he would play her game.

"Won't you show me how to do it right then, cousin?" Aemond asked her.

Alyssa looked at him. Her gaze rested on him a tad too long as decency would allow. She eyed him, taking in the changes of his body. He wondered what she saw. What she thought of him. What was going on in her pretty head, because he certainly couldn't deny her beauty. As a girl she had been sweet, now a goddess stood before him.

She closed her eyes for a brief moment, then a smile appeared on her face that took Aemond's breath away. Alyssa shook her head. "No I do not want to." She stepped even closer to him so that they were only a few centimeters apart. Aemond took in the whispers around them. And at the same time her scent enveloped him. She smelled like dragon, like leather and some sweet pastries. Was she still that fond of lemon pie?

She leaned forward. "It wouldn't be fitting to send the king's son down and shove him in the dirt, wouldn’t it?"

Her provocation did something to Aemond that he couldn't name. He wanted to laugh out loud, but kept his emotions under control. "You're still fighting the fights of others," he said simply, but he felt the corner of his mouth twitch.

Alyssa looked at him and shrugged. "Maybe instead of bullying your nephews, find someone your size for your next fight."

Aemond's eye narrowed and he looked from Alyssa to Luke and Jace. He hated that she defended them both. Why was she on the side of those bastards? "Are you offering yourself?" He looked at the dagger at her hip. Could she handle it? Or were the weapons just a deterrent ornament? Aemond was dying to find out.

Alyssa smiled. "Maybe next time, if you dare."

Aemond looked back from the knife at her hip to Alyssa's face. Her violet eyes shone. A fire burned within that threatened to consume him. She was enjoying this. Enjoyed their spanking. Aemond did, too. He could have teased her for hours.

Then his gaze wandered to her lips. They were fuller than before, inviting. He swallowed when he had to remind himself that they weren't alone. The members of the Court stood around them and watched. Enjoying the show they put on for them.

Then Aemond couldn't help but chuckle. Alyssa's eyes widened slightly at the sound and she took a step back as if she has burned herself on him. Something had changed in her face, but Aemond couldn't quite put his finger on what it was.

Not until she bit her lip and took a deep breath. Her chest heaved faster and she licked her lips. He now knew what it was. Desire. And she didn't want to feel this desire, he could say, because now a frown appeared on her forehead and she clenched her jaw.

No matter how much time had passed, he still had an impact on her, had an effect on her. They were drawn to each other, burning in the same ceaseless fire.

A grin curled Aemond's lips. He was still in the game. In the game about Alyssa's heart. Maybe her heart would refuse at first, but her body was already on his side, that was for sure.

"And how I will dare. It would even be an honor for me."

"The honor will be on my side, my prince," she whispered the last words and smirked. "It will be my pleasure to wipe that grin off your face."

He heard Luke laugh behind them and that only angered Aemond more. He closed the distance between him and Alyssa and grabbed her chin, pushing it up so she had to face him.

She didn't even look surprised, let alone impressed. Instead she laughed.

He felt her breath on his face. Their lips were only a few centimeters apart. He would only have to bend down and he would be able to conquer her mouth with his. He would love to do that. He wanted to know how she tasted, how she felt and what sounds she made when she enjoyed his touch. He wanted her!

"If you dare touch me again, I'll slit your throat," she said in a sweet voice.

Aemond raised an eyebrow in surprise. "I think you're misinterpreting the situation, Princess. You don't have the upper hand here."

"Oh really? Then you want to die childless?"

At first he didn't understand what she meant, but then she moved a little and he felt the blade on his thigh. Not right on his thigh, he liked to say.

He was impressed without wanting to be. But he wouldn't let her win. "I thought you were going to slit my throat. That's not my throat, in case you don't know, Princess."

Alyssa looked at him in surprise, but he saw the slight blush on her cheeks. The innocence in her eyes that she was trying to hide.

"And just in case you don't know, I don't care if I cut your balls off or slit your throat. Put your hands on me one more time and you'll regret it."

She was pure fire. And he loved it. Her interactions were different than six years ago, that much was certain. But somehow the same. They had grown up, the childlike behavior between them had disappeared. What was left was passion and fire. Maybe a little bit of hostility too.

Aemond grinned at her, wanting to disarm her, pull her close and kiss her. But he wasn't allowed to. Not yet.

At that moment, the entrance gates opened and Alyssa tore herself away from him. Tucked the blade back into the belt at her waist, but didn't take her eyes off Aemond. He too continued to stare at her. Out of the corner of his eye he caught Lord Vaemond Velaryon entering with his entourage. Soon the game would begin and he was ready to make the first move to claim his queen.

___________________________

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[apricia]

For ever by your side / Aemond Targaryen x reader // Part VI

Chapter 6 - The Matters of Driftmark

Six years have passed. Six years that Alyssa called Dragonstone home. Or what came closest to home.

She loved her sisters and enjoyed spending time with them. But much better with Vermithor. He was her ally, her companion, her one true friend.

Lovingly she stroked the bronze fury's neck. Vermithor let out a rumble. He liked it when she gave him her attention. When she caressed and praised him. As if he were a man basking in her affection.

"Where have you been?"

Alyssa would have been startled at the sudden voice, but she already knew she was expected. "I didn't know I had to keep you informed of my comings and goings."

Daemon narrowed his eyes at her, her mouth tightening. "You disappear far too often without saying where you're going."

"I seem to have inherited this quality from my father. As well as my urge to be rebellious."

"It's not funny, Alyssa. If you don't say where you're going, nobody can-"

"Can nobody what? Protect me? Don't be ridiculous, nobody can anyway."

They stared at each other without saying a word.

"I didn't teach you how to fight so that you would secretly take part in the battles on the Stepstones with Vermithor and put yourself in danger there. Or that you would secretly fly to Pentos or King's Landing."

Alyssa raised an eyebrow. "You seem to know a lot about my nightly activities. So why are you asking? Or are you interested in details?" 

Daemon glared at her and shook his head. She could have sworn that Daemon was only waiting for her for this one reason. As if he had nothing better to do in the middle of the night.

"If you didn't want me to use my skills, why teach me at all?"

Alyssa wasn't like her sisters Baela and Rhaena. Sitting around was not her thing. She could distract herself with books, studying and good conversations. But she would never consider dancing or embroidery as an occupation. She would rather throw herself off the next tower.

"You may be a dragon rider now, but you were not trained to fight on a dragon."

"I don't have to. Vermithor knows what he's doing. He's a dragon created in war. That's his element. I hardly contribute. And if you don't defend the Stepstones and neither does the king , then-"

"Then what? Then you take over this task?"

"Yes."

Daemon started laughing. "You are seventeen years old, Alyssa. You are a woman, not a warrior. The affairs of the Stepstones are none of your business."

"Would you rather I'm sitting here by the warm fire, knitting a blanket and thinking about my future husband."

"Gods forbid, no. That sounds like torture."

"Then what's your problem? That I'm free to do that but you aren't?"

Alyssa had hit the mark with her question. Daemon's face betrayed him. He missed the fights on the Stepstones, missed Pentos - although Alyssa wasn't there as often as he had suggested. He loved the freedom of being able to do what he pleased. But Daemon now had other commitments. He was a father, a husband and the Queen's future prince consort. Rhaenyra needed him on Dragonstone.

"Why are you the only one of my daughters who gives me trouble?"

"Let's call it justice for your ignoring me for the first eleven years of my life. Or call it karma, the will of the gods, whatever please you."

"Viserys was right, you really are too much like me."

Alyssa raised an eyebrow in surprise. When should the king have said that?

"What? Did you think my dear brother wouldn't tell me about you when you were still living in King's Landing. He kept me informed about you."

"And yet you didn't bother to ask about me yourself. You really are an exemplary father."

Instead of taking her statement to heart or being angry with her, Daemon just laughed. "How's it going on the Stepstones?"

Alyssa laughed softly. She had known he wanted details. Daemon was a warrior who preferred blood to words.

"Things could be better. They need the Crown's support to bring the war there to an end soon."

"And you didn't use your influence at court and asked for help?"

"What influence?"

"You were Alicent's ward, she currently sits on the throne and I'm sure she would be delighted to be of service to you."

"You overestimate my impact. It is not my place to request a favor from the crown or to impose conditions. Lord Corlys, as Lord of the Tides, must do that. I help where I can, but only on the open sea do I dare intervene. I hold back in the fights on the beach. From above I can't tell friend from foe and I don't want to reduce our own people to ashes."

She told Daemon about the ship she had sunk with Vermithor. Alyssa was not used to fighting from a dragon's back and she avoided any risk. She flies the second largest dragon alive, but a single well-placed arrow could kill her. She told him that she was being cautious, holding back and hardly doing anything. The mere presence of a dragon was enough to spur on their own soldiers and make opponents tremble with fear. Daemon agreed, not knowing that Alyssa wasn't telling him the whole truth. When Daemon's questions only referred to Lord Corly's, Alyssa knew something was wrong.

"Will you tell me what's going on or do I have to guess?"

Lord Corlys was her sisters' grandfather and although Alyssa was not related to him, she liked the man. He was a good leader, kind to Baela and Rhaena and supportive of them. He had promised her not to tell Daemon and Rhaenyra that she was fighting on the Stepstones. And he kept that promise. Even if she hadn't seen him in the last battles because they had fought on different fronts. From Vermithor's back, she could barely make out individual faces on the ground.

They entered the hall of Dragonstone, where the princess and Rhaena were already gathered. Rhaenyra stood with her sons and her voice sounded worried.

Alyssa raised an eyebrow and looked from Daemon to the princess. She curtsied to Rhaenyra.

"Alyssa, there you are." The princess looked at Daemon, who nodded at her. Rhaenyra didn't seem to know how Alyssa passed her free time. That was a secret between her and Daemon.

Rhaena smiled at her sister, but Alyssa could see her concern too.

"Did something happen?"

Rhaenyra nodded, holding a piece of parchment in her hands. "That came from Baela last evening. Lord Corlys was injured on the Stepstones and his life is in danger."

Alyssa opened her mouth, closed it again and looked at Daemon. Why hadn't he said anything to her? They had talked about the fighting on the Stepstones and he hadn't said a word about Corlys being hurt. She glared at Daemon, who ignored her.

"Is there anything we can do?" Alyssa asked, turning back to the princess.

Rhaenyra looked tense, but nodded. "Lord Corly's brother, Lord Vaemond, has called a tribunal to discuss Driftmark's legacy."

Alyssa made a surprised sound. "What is there to clarify? Luke is the next Lord of the Tides should Lord Corlys die." Which she didn't hope. Corlys was a man, a warrior. He had experience and fighting spirit. Luke was a young boy, not yet a man, and barely able to wield a sword. How was he supposed to command the fights on the Stepstones?

Alyssa looked at her stepbrother. She and Luke weren't very close. He still saw her as Aemond's best friend and she saw him as the one who had taken Aemond's eye. They understood each other, could even laugh with each other, but nothing more.

"That's how it is, but the crown has agreed to the hearing." Rhaenyra and Daemon exchanged a look that Alyssa noticed immediately.

They didn't speak of the crown, but of the Hightowers. Even the years on Dragonstone had not changed the rivalry between the princess and the queen. Despite her stay here, Alyssa held no grudges against Alicent, not even Otto. She would never forget how she treated her. With love and understanding.

"Then you will travel to King's Landing to witness the matter and speak for your son?" Alyssa asked the princess.

"We will all go," replied the princess.

Alyssa held her breath. Who did she mean by 'all'? Alyssa's gaze slid to Daemon, who nodded in agreement. „Me too?“

Rhaenyra nodded. "Yes, you too. You are a princess of the House of Targaryen."

"So it is. But this is a matter of the Velaryons. I have nothing to do with it."

Everyone in this room had to realize that she had no reason to go to King's Landing. At least not in this matter. She couldn't speak for Luke, her opinion wouldn't be heard anyway. She might be a princess, but her voice was of no value. There was discussion of Driftmark, of the line of succession that Alyssa was not, and never would be, a part of.

"You may be right about that, Alyssa. But your presence will help strengthen Luke's claim." Her and her dragon's presence.

Alyssa wasn't stupid, she knew only too well that Rhaenyra and Daemon hoped to get the queen's favor if Alyssa stood by their side. Or to undermine Vaemond's claim and thereby the plans of the hand of the king and the Queen. Alyssa wanted none of that. She should stay out of it.

"Furthermore, this came from the capital this morning." Daemon held up another scroll of parchment.

Alyssa looked at him expectantly. "And what does it say in there?"

"You and I are expected at court." Daemon didn't seem too pleased with the piece of paper. She didn't know if the message came from Alicent, from Otto or even from Viserys, but Alyssa could see that Daemon would prefer not to accept the invitation. And he only did it because Rhaenyra had to go to King's Landing anyway.

"What for?"

Daemon shrugged. "I can't say that. They didn't think it necessary to state the reasons." And it was clear from his voice what he thought of it.

Alyssa clenched her fists and took a deep breath. "So we're all going to King's Landing together, am I right?"

This wasn't the greeting she had hoped for. Actually, Alyssa hadn't expected a greeting at all. She had wanted to come to Dragonstone, take care of Vermithor, and fall asleep. The flight and fighting on the Stepstones had been tiring, and she and Vermithor needed rest.

Rhaenyra nodded. "That's the way it is."

Alyssa swallowed hard and then looked at the princess. "And when do we leave?"

"At dawn. Requests will be heard the next day.“

That was only a few hours. Alyssa wasn't prepared for this. Under no circumstances. She hadn't expected to leave for King's Landing any time soon. Didn't expect to see her old home anytime soon and the people who lived there. One in particular.

She didn't want to see him. Just wasn't ready for it. She hadn't seen him for years, trying not to think about him, even if that hadn't always worked. Facing him now was something Alyssa lacked the courage for.

No matter how skilled she had become with a sword, how well she could fight, none of it would prepare her for this encounter. He was her weak point and probably always would be. Just the thought of Aemond Targaryen made Alyssa a little girl again.

"Prepare yourself," Daemon whispered to her. She knew full well that he wasn't talking about Driftmark matters.

Rhaena smiled encouragingly at her and walked over to her, putting a hand on her shoulder. "You should take a bath and get some sleep before we leave," her sister said in a friendly voice.

"That's a good idea," Rhaenyra agreed. "We will then meet at dawn and ride to King's Landing on dragon wings."

Alyssa just nodded haltingly. She had lost her speech. Didn't trust her voice. “You could have warned me, Daemon," she accused the prince.

He just looked at her blankly and left.

Rhaena looked after her father and then looked back at Alyssa. "You still know him by name."

Alyssa frowned in surprise. "What else should I call him?"

"How about father?"

Alyssa shook her head. "He sired me, but he is not my father, Rhaena." Her sister nodded understandingly, albeit with a sad look, and left the hall as well. 

Jace appeared next to Alyssa and looked at her. He was taller than she was now, had gotten broader. But in her eyes he was still a boy. Even if one day he would sit on the Iron Throne. For now he was still a boy, stuggeling to even learn the language of they ancestors.

"You can avoid him. If you don't want to see him, you don't have to."

Alyssa gave him a stiff smile. How wrong Jace was. He still hadn't understood. There was no way to avoid Aemond Targaryen. She wouldn't be able to avoid him. Because as soon as she was near him, she would felt attracted to him. As if some supernatural force was pulling her his way.

There was no way she could avoid Aemond. The only thing she could control was the way she approached him. And Alyssa would make sure it would be an unforgettable reunion.

Like every morning, Aemond rose before sunrise, beginning his daily lessons before meeting Ser Criston around noon. He was worried if he would throw his teacher to the ground this time. And if so, how long would it take.

He was on his way to the library when he sah a white robe disappeared around a corner. It was not uncommon for a Kingsguard to wander the corridors of the red keep. What irritated Aemond, however, was the person the knight was supporting. He would recognize his brother's silver-white hair anywhere.

He quickened his steps. "Ser Arryk," Aemond said, keeping his voice low so as not to alert the whole keep to the situation.

The knight turned, clutching Aegon's torso, who appeared unconscious. "My prince," said Ser Aryyk, looking from one prince to the other.

"Where did you pick him up this time?" It wasn't the first time he'd seen his older brother drunk and under the influence of drugs trying for some guards to get him into his chambers.

"From a brothel in Fleabottom," admitted the knight.

Aemond gritted his teeth. He hated the way Aegon treated Helaena. How he publicly discredited her. That's not how you treated your sister or your wife. But Aegon didn't care about any of that. He always did what he liked and didn't care what other people said about him.

"Were there witnesses?"

Ser Arrysk nodded stiffly. "The prince doesn't value discretion very much."

Aemond knew that too. His older brother didn't even try to hide who he was when he went to Fleabottom and sought out his whores. He didn't care that he might be kidnapped or even killed in the filthy streets of Fleabottom.

At that moment, Aegon lifted his head. Eyes swollen as if he had slept for hours. He looked around in confusion, as if trying to figure out where he was. Then his eyes met Aemond.

"Brother," Aegon said in a slur, raising a hand as if to toast to his brother, only his hand was empty. This seemed to irritate Aegon. "Where's the wine? I want more wine! Ser Arryk get me some wine."

Aemond shook his head. How could someone sink so low?

"You should go to bed, Your Highness," said the knight. The situation made him uncomfortable, although Aemond knew full well that Ser Arryk had often seen Aegon in this state. Far too often.

"Nonsense, it's still early," Aegon complained, trying to pull away from the knight.

"Indeed, brother. It's already morning and you should have been in your bed for hours. Preferably next to your wife. When was the last time you checked on hr or your children?"

At times, Aemond dared to doubt that Aegon cared in the least for Jaehaerys and Jaehaera. Whether his children laughed, cried or existed at all probably didn't matter to Aegon. The only thing he must have probably enjoyed was getting them into their sister's womb.

Aegon didn't seem to like the mention of his children. He made a face and Aemond thought his brother was about to throw up at his feet. If Aegon did that, Aemond would punch him in the face, that was for sure.

He wasn't Helaena, he wouldn't put up with such behavior from Aegon. At least not when neither his mother nor the hand were around. Ser Arryk wouldn't be able to stop Aemond if he decided to beat the shit out of his brother.

"Don't preach to me, brother. You'd better have a drink with me. You could accompany me next time. It's been far too long since we went on an adventure together." Aegon laughed and tried to pull away from the knight, but staggered and fell back into his arms.

"No thanks," Aemond said in a bitter tone. He remembered too well his thirteenth name day when Aegon had decided to make a man out of Aemond. He would never go to a brothel with his brother again. He would prefer to scratch out his remaining eye himself.

"You're boring, brother. Why are you even awake already? Do you want to join the crumpled old men in the library again. Doing this to yourself... The company of whores is more enjoyable, believe me. Or are you up the way to your dragon? You spend too much time with the beast. It's more fun riding women, or having them ride you, than a dragon. I actually thought you knew that."

Aemond crossed his arms behind his back and clenched his fists there. The only things his brother could talk about were wine and whores. "Maybe it would do you good to spend more time with Sunfyre. Your dragon probably doesn't even know what you look like anymore."

Should Aegon ride Sunfyre in this state, he would fall from his saddle and be crushed on the streets of King's Landing.

"Or spend more time with your wife and children. They all haven't seen you in a while." But maybe that was better. Aemond sometimes didn't recognize his brother. Even now there were dark circles under his eyes, his hair was stringy and dirt stuck under Aegon's fingernails. If he weren't dressed in the finery of the court, you'd think he'd come from the gutter. Just like the whores he fucked.

"Don't remind me of her or the children," Aegon muttered, motioning for Ser Arryk to keep walking. But one look from Aemond was enough and the knight stayed where he was.

"You have duties to perform, Aegon."

"Shut up, Aemond. It might be easy for you, you are the second son. And you will always be the second son. How I would like to trade places with you."

Aemond made a face. He would also prefer if they could swap positions, but unfortunately that wasn't possible. He did everything in his power to make his family proud. Learned the history of their house, studied philosophy and law. He did everything that was asked of him. But he didn't do it for the crown because he would never get it. His brother was right, he was only the second son. And even Aegon wasn't the heir to the Iron Throne, not according to her father. He did it for a different reason. His goal, which he has been pursuing for six years now and never lost sight of.

At every training session, at every lesson, it was always her face that he had in mind. He hadn't cared how many times he'd hurt himself during practice sessions, how many times Ser Criston had pushed him in the dirt, or how much the maesters had pressured him to learn faster. Aemond had never complained. Proving himself worthy had been a harder and rockier road than he had imagined as a child. But every effort would be worth it in the end. 

"But you can't, Aegon. So accept your fate and submit. That would make it easier for everyone, including you."

Why was his brother acting like he was being asked to become a eunuch or abstain. All that was asked of Aegon was to take some responsibility and not act like a naughty bully. But even that was asking too much. 

"Have you accepted your fate, brother? I doubt it. Otherwise you wouldn't still longing for Alyssa." Aegon laughed, a belch escaping him, and Aemond grimaced in disgust. "Ser Arryk, do you know our cousin Princess Alyssa?"

Ser Arryk looked from Aegon to Aemond and shook his head. "I never met the princess."

"What a shame. She's a feast for the eyes. I met her in Fleabottom the other day. She's grown into a true beauty. You'd be envied, brother."

Aemond looked at his brother, shaking his head. What had he drunk this time that he thought he had seen Alyssa? She was on Dragonstone and certainly wouldn't be wandering the filthy streets of Fleabottom. Aegon must have mistaken her cousin for one of his whores. Blinded by too much wine.

"Go to bed, Aegon, and sleep it off." Aemond was tired of having this conversation with his brother. Aegon wouldn't care anyway. 

"Jealous that I saw Alyssa before you?"

Aemond's eye narrowed. He saw Alyssa in his dreams every night, but he didn't pretend to see her anywhere in the corridors of the castle. He knew she wasn't here. "Watch your mouth, brother," when it came to Alyssa, Aemond wasn't kidding. He had insulted her once with words, he wouldn't let it happen again, no matter who was talking about her.

"Already nervous?" Aegon laughed, but his laugh became a hiccup. Spit ran down his chin.

Aemond looked at his brother in disgust. And Otto wanted to put someone like that on the Iron Throne. May the gods have mercy on them if Aegon were to become king.

"What do you mean?" He had no idea what his brother was getting at. Maybe it was just another drunkard's thoughtless words.

Aegon blinked at his brother, laughed again. "You don't even know, do you?"

Aemond narrowed his eye, glancing quickly at Ser Arryk, who had averted his eyes. He didn't want to get involved in the affairs of the two brothers. 

“Spit it out, Aegon. I don't have time for this nonsense." He had tasks and duties to fulfill. And unlike his brother, he took them seriously.

"She's coming."

"Who?"

"Alyssa. She's coming to King's Landing."

Aemond's heart stopped for a moment. What?

"Alyssa, our whoring sister, and our insane uncle and all their bastard children, but probably also the few legitimate children they have, they’re all coming."

"Why should they do this?"

Aegon shrugged. "I'm not sure but it has something to do with Luke's claim to Driftmark." He yawned. "I wasn't particularly interested, you know."

Dirftmark? Had something happened to Lord Corlys or why did the Velaryons come to King's Landing to discuss the succession? And if it was a matter of the Velaryons, why did Alyssa come with them? She wasn't a Velaryon, she was a Targaryen. Driftmark's affairs were none of her business.

"Go to bed, brother." Aemond was already turning away, no longer willing to converse with his brother. Aegon was already getting on his nerves.

He heard laughter behind him. "Go ahead, Aemond. I'm sure it will be an entertaining reunion. Finally getting some pep in this cage. It's about time our beloved cousin came home. I've missed her, she's a lot more entertaining than you are."

Aemond's jaw clenched. It took all of his self-control not to punch his brother in the face. He simply left Aegon and Ser Arryk behind and went to his mother's chambers instead of the library.

Alyssa came here and no one felt the need to tell him about it?

The thought of his former best friend made his heart beat faster in his chest. He'd missed her, so much.

But soon he would see her again, after all this time.

___________________________

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[apricia]

For ever by your side / Aemond Targaryen x reader // Part V

Chapter 5 - New Friends, old Desires 

Weeks had passed since Alyssa had reached Dragonstone. Rhaenyra and Daemon had married and now ruled Dragonstone together.

Alyssa had used the past few weeks to make friends with Baela and Rhaena. Her sisters and she didn't have much in common it seemed, but that didn't matter that much. They were of the same blood and got along well.

It was different with Luke and Jace. The two boys were skeptical of her, almost suspicious. As if they expected Alyssa to smother them with a pillow in their sleep. Which was nonsense, because Alyssa would never do such a thing.

Unwilling to make complete peace with Luke and Jace, Alyssa had devoted herself to her training. Daemon kept his promise. Already on the first day he had started to teach her. Alyssa couldn't say he was a gracious teacher, or a patient one. She had watched Ser Criston at his lessons, even Ser Harwin. Neither man was like Daemon. He was brutal, unyielding and didn't tolerate the slightest mistake. What sounded cruel to most was a welcome change for Alyssa. It was just what she needed. Due to the training, the sore muscles and her exhaustion, she didn't get much time to think about what had happened. She had no time for regrets, no time for doubts, no time to miss him. And it was fine like that.

She had received messages from Helaena, from Alicent. Even her uncle, King Viserys, had written to her. So far Alyssa had not dared to open the letters. Because no matter what they all had to say, it wouldn't change Alyssa's decision. Not when the one responsible for her grief and departure was still silent.

Alyssa still dreamed about the events on Driftmark. In her dreams, she saw Aemond, Luke, and Jace fighting. She heard the screams, the anger. And she heard Aemond's words. Again and again. As if she were unable to forget them, although Alyssa wanted nothing more than to forget.

"Again." The demanding voice snapped Alyssa out of her thoughts.

She she did as she was told. She gripped the hilt of the sword tighter and charged at her teacher. Three blows, a fake maneuver, the clash of steel.  Sweat ran down her temples and she felt the thud in her arms. The force with which the swords had met reverberated throughout her body.

Even though weeks had passed and Alyssa wasn't as clumsy as she was the first time, she was far from being a master. Not even an amateur. She didn't even have the talent for being called that.

But she felt her body getting stronger. How her muscles grew. And she felt herself gaining confidence. Her fear subsided. She no longer felt that she was being followed into her sleep. Her nightmares about the attack diminished. The better she got with the sword, the less often she dreamed of the assassination.

„Again.“

Alyssa snorted, but didn't argue, instead attacking again.  She was slowly losing her strength.  She's been training for hours.  While she looked like a plucked chicken, Daemon looked like he'd just stepped out of a relaxing bath.

Luke and Jace had watched their first fights. Luke in particular had laughed every time Daemon had sent her down. But the laughter had died down after the two brothers realized that no matter how many times Alyssa landed in the dirt, she always got up. She didn't give up.

She didn't want to impress anyone. Had no intention of earning her position on Dragonstone. To earn a position in the Princess' family. She only did as she pleased. She wanted to learn how to fight, so she did.

In King's Landing, she had not been allowed to practice swordsmanship. Here nobody stopped her.

Even though she didn't consider Daemon her father, didn't even really like him or even respect him, she appreciated the freedom he gave her. He asked nothing of Alyssa in return. At least nothing apart from her ambition and commitment. He wanted her to give everything she had. That's exactly what Alyssa did. Every goddamn day, until she fell into bed at night, completely exhausted.

Rhaenyra was friendly but reserved towards Alyssa. As if she understood that she would not be a substitute mother for the girl, nor her friend. Alyssa wasn't looking for a mother. Rhaenyra was nothing more than a cousin to her and now her biological father's new wife. Sometimes they talked, they even went for a walk together on the beach. Rhaenyra had introduced her to Syrax, but Alyssa had refrained from any further encounters with the princess's dragon. The dragon egg that had been laid in her cradle had been Syrax's. But it hadn't hatched and Alyssa was therefore dragonless. She didn't blame either Rhaenyra or Syrax for this. Still, she didn't want to spend any more time with the dragon than was necessary.

"Good," Daemon said, unimpressed and lowered his sword. "We're done for today. Go take a bath, you stink like a whole goat shed."

Alyssa just glared at him. She knew she smelled of sweat, but still better than a goat. At least she thought so.

Alyssa went to her room, which was right next to her sisters'. Baela and Rhaena kept her company while she bathed. While Alyssa washed, her sisters chattered non-stop. It was good to hear them both laugh. After Lady Laena's death, the two girls had been unable to do so for a long time. Even the fact that her father had remarried hadn't helped her sisters get over the loss of their mother. Daemon couldn't comfort them, which to Alyssa was just a sign that Daemon Targaryen wasn't made to be a father. He didn't know how to comfort his daughters, how to make them happy. Something every father should know.

"Father wants to have dinner with all of us," Rhaena said, smiling.

Alyssa nodded. She didn't call Daemon father. Maybe she would never do that. She wasn't even sure if she wanted to be part of his family. It had only mattered to her to get away from Aemond and his cruel words.

"And Daemon gets what Daemon wants," Alyssa murmured, stepping out of the tub. She wrapped herself in a warm towel and began to dry herself. In King's Landing she had a maid who tended to Alyssa's needs. There was nobody here who took on these tasks. But Alyssa didn't need one either.

"Why don't you call him father?" Baela asked curiously. "You live with us now, we are family. You should call him father."

Alyssa stifled a snort. She didn't think Daemon would approve of her calling him father. In any case, she didn't want it herself. Viserys was more of a father to her than Daemon had been. At that thought, she realized how much she missed her uncle. Missed the stories he told her. She missed Helaena. Missed her time with the princess and her bugs. Alyssa had even caught herself searching her room for spiders to feel close to her cousin. But it hadn't been the same.

She even caught herself missing Aegon. His taunts and jokes. They hadn't always been bad. Alyssa even had to laugh at some of them. Most of all she missed Alicent and... and Aemond. Her heart clenched at the thought of her foster mother and her best friend. She didn't want to admit it, but she had already regretted her decision as soon as she set foot on Dragonstone. Alyssa knew in her heart that if Aemond showed up and apologized, she would return to King's Landing in a heartbeat. A letter would probably been enough to convince her. Any sign that he regretted his words. That he regretted his actions. That he begged her forgiveness. But until now this sign had not existed. And Alyssa was too stubborn to return.

To satisfy her longing, Alyssa had chosen the Dragonstone Library as her favorite place. Here she felt close to Aemond without having to admit that she missed him. And she missed him very much.

"I will call him father if he ever takes that role." But Daemon would never do that. Her sisters might see it differently, but Daemon wasn't a father, at least not a good one. Baela nodded, although she didn't seem to understand what Alyssa meant. Alyssa didn't blame her sister. Because neither Baela nor Rhaena knew what it was like to have been rejected as a child. But Alyssa knew it and she would never forget it.

"Come on now, we don't want to keep the princess and the princes waiting, do we?" Alyssa smiled at her sisters and pulled them behind her towards the dining room.

Dinners with Rhaenyra's family usually cheered Alyssa up. Because they were loud, casual and entertaining. Luke was fooling around, Jace was telling jokes, and Daemon wasn't above joining in the boys' banter. Baela and Rhaena were more reserved, but they also added to the cheerful mood just by their presence. 

Just as Luke was making Joffrey laugh with strange grimaces, a servant walked in and handed Daemon a scroll.

"What is that?" the Prince asked.

"The maester reviewed the letters that arrived for the princess and made a list, my prince."

Alyssa looked at the servant curiously. She had no idea what he was talking about. Neither did Daemon.

"A list for what?" Daemon raised an eyebrow and looked over at Rhaenyra.

"An engagement, my prince."

Daemon looked at him in surprise, but then started laughing. "Doesn't the maester know that the princess is already married?"

"Not Princess Rhaenyra, my prince. The proposals are all addressed to Princess Alyssa."

Alyssa choked on the potato she had just put in her mouth and started coughing. She choked out the vegetables and spat them all over the table.

All eyes were on her. Luke and Jace laughed, Baela and Rhaena grinned behind their hands, but Daemon's and Rhaenyra's faces were serious.

Daemon looked from Alyssa to the servant, then opened the parchment with a snort. He skimmed the words, and with each line his eyes grew fiercer.

"But the maester knows that Alyssa is only eleven years old, doesn't he?"

The servant bowed his head, looking uncomfortable. "Certainly, my prince."

"Then what's this nonsense? Why should I consider getting her engaged? Now?"

He looked at Rhaenyra, who returned the look without a word. She might be Daemon's wife, but she had no right to interfere in decisions affecting Alyssa. She wasn't her mother and she wasn't the queen yet. 

"I don't want to get married," Alyssa blurted out, wide-eyed at Daemon. She was just a child, just eleven years old. It was not new to her that some wedding vows were made early. After all, Aegon and Helaena had also recently been engaged, and Helaena was only a year older than Alyssa. Nevertheless, an engagement was out of the question for her. She really hoped Daemon felt the same way. But the way he looked at the document, tell Alyssa that he was on her side. At least this one time.

"She's too young for something like that," was all he said and threw the parchment carelessly on the table. "Besides, most of the names are out of the question anyway. Espacially the last one.“

Alyssa raised an eyebrow. Why were these men out of the question? She dared to doubt that it was because of her own origins. She was a bastard, and Daemon would hardly care if the men who proposed to her were deaf, blind, low-ranking, or nearly dead. It shouldn't matter to him, after all he didn't consider Alyssa his heir, much less his daughter.

"Which houses proposed?" Rhaenyra demanded, although it was obvious to Daemon that he was ready to drop the subject.

When Daemon didn't answer her, Rhaenyra grabbed the piece of paper and began to read. Eventually she opened her eyes and looked from Daemon to Alyssa. She swallowed and put the paper aside.

Alyssa was taken aback. What did that mean? Whose name brought both Daemon and Rhaenyra to such a reaction? Without anyone stopping her, Alyssa jumped out of her chair and grabbed the parchment.

There were the names of noble houses, of great and important houses. Alyssa hadn't thought men like that would be interested in her. Even if she had been legitimated, everyone knew who her mother had been. She had thought it would affect courtship. Apparently it didn't when even names like Stark and Lannister were there. 

But when Alyssa got to the last name on the list, her heart stopped. She stared at the name, hearing the blood pounding in her ears. Her hands started shaking.

"How may I understand this list?" she asked the servant. Were these the Maester's suggestions as to who might be her future husband of did these houses really sent an offer for her hand in marriage?

The servant looked from Alyssa to Daemon, who motioned for the servant to explain the matter to her.

"Since the prince took you in and you were living on Dragonstone, ravens have been arriving with messages from many houses across Westeros." The servant swallowed. "Messages where fathers ask for your hand in marriage for their sons."

Alyssa's lower lip began to tremble. If that was true, then either Alicent or Viserys had sent a raven to Dragonstone, since the last name on the list was Aemond Targaryens.

Alyssa throw the paper of herself and stormed out of the room. She heard shouts behind her, heard her name being said, but Alyssa ignored them all.

Alyssa didn't know where she really wanted to go, as long as she went away. It hadn't been Aemond who had proposed to her. Alicent had done that for him. At least, that's what Alyssa suspected. He hadn't contacted her, hadn't apologized to her, and yet he was a candidate for the role of her future husband. There was a chance that she would marry him. That she had to marry him.

Alyssa's heart clenched painfully at the thought. Just a few months ago, an engagement to Aemond wouldn't have bothered her. On the contrary, she would have advocated such a connection. But now things were different. Aemond had trashed her and their friendship. Had turned away from her. While he may not have known about the proposal, Viserys and Alicent both knew that Alyssa had wanted to leave King's Landing, and with it Aemond. They might not know the exact circumstances, but did it matter? Maybe Aemond had told his parents what had happened. But Alyssa didn't believe in it. She knew Aemond. He was reluctant to admit a mistake he had made. He would not admit to Alicent what he had said to her. Alyssa was sure of that.

Her blood boiled, her pulse dropped too fast. Anger rush through her vains, anger and sorrow. She was not sure how to feel about this offer. As if a prince of the realm would marry the daughter of a common whore. Alyssa found herself in the underground passages of Dragonstone. She had never been here before. Had been afraid of the dark and the many tunnels. But now she welcomed the blackness around her, for no one would see her tears here.

She sobbed and wiped her hands over her cheeks. There was a rumble behind her and Alyssa froze. Only faintly did some light reach her from the path she had come. Not enough light to illuminate what was behind her.

The roar sounded again, closer this time. Alyssa held her breath. She knew that sound, though she didn't know which dragon that sound belonged to. But only a beast of the air could roar like that.

She turned slowly, trying to see the shapes of the creature in the darkness. She hoped it was Syrax or Vermax. Dragons she already knew and wouldn't burn her to ashes right away. Although Alyssa wasn't even sure if these two wouldn't also kill her immediately. 

Alyssa saw nothing, but could already feel the beast's warm breath on her skin. She shuddered. There was a possibility that she would die at any moment. She could die and she would never have told Aemond how much he had hurt her and how much she needed him by her side.

A cone of light illuminated the darkness in front of her and a horrified gasp erupted.

"Don't move, Alyssa," Jace whispered to her.

But he didn't have to tell her that. Alyssa stared into the gaping jaws of Vermithor, the bronze fury. It had been King Jaehaerys Targaryen's dragon, and Vermithor had not had a rider since the old king's death. He spent his time alone and in isolation in the Dragonstone catacombs.

Alyssa swallowed and closed her eyes for a moment. "You can kill me. I would understand. I have disturbed your resting place and trespassed on your territory. If you are forced to turn me to ashes for this, I could understand, believe me. I can understand what it is like if you prefer to be alone. I feel the same way," Alyssa hadn't noticed that she had switched to High Valyrian since speaking to the dragon. But she just kept talking, her throat filled with tears.

"When you're alone, no one can hurt you. I know what it's like when a blade hurts you, but words can be just as bad. Maybe even worse. The death of your last rider must have been hard for you. I know what it's like to lose a friend. It's not an easy thing to get over. I don't know if I'll ever get over it." She lifted her head and looked at Vermithor. The old dragon watched her as if he understood every word she said.

Alyssa reached out to the bronze beast, amazed at how warm its skin felt beneath her fingers. The scales were rough and at the same time silky. Alyssa had never felt anything like this before. She swallowed hard and looked up at the gigantic beast.

"Forgive me if I disturbed you in your cave. It wasn't my intention. I was just looking for a place to be alone. I didn't know you had already claimed it for yourself. If you don't mind, we can share this place. I promise I'll only come when it's necessary. I won't bother you or take this place away from you. But maybe we can both be here alone… together. And maybe you are tired of being lonely too. I could understand that. You've been alone for a long time. I couldn't do that. Maybe you don't want to be lonely anymore, who knows."

She gently stroked Vermithor's snout and the dragon snorted under her fingers. He dropped to his front legs and pressed his face into Alyssa's hand. She looked up at the dragon in amazement, not knowing what to do.

"Do you want me to leave you alone, Vermithor?" she asked softly.

Alyssa didn't know what she was expecting, but the rumble that now came from the dragon's throat sounded menacing. She heard Jace gasp behind her.

"Is that a no?" she asked the dragon.

Vermithor turned away from her and Alyssa thought he wanted her to leave him alone. Instead, he leaned sideways and presented her the saddle strapped to his back.

Alyssa looked at him with wide eyes. "You want me to-?“ She couldn't pronounce the question. It was absurd. She had come down here to vent her grief, to cry, not to claim a dragon she hadn't even known was here.

"I let you out of my sight for two seconds and you claim the bronze fury. Not bad." She heard Daemon laugh, who had appeared next to Jace and put a hand on his shoulder. Another laugh escaped Daemon. "Now I'll hardly be able to save myself from proposals for your hand, well done."

"I didn't mean to..." Alyssa stammered and was about to tell Daemon that she hadn't claimed Vermithor when the dragon grew impatient.

"He chose you, Alyssa. Now you will have to ride him," Daemon said dryly.

"But-"

"No buts. You are a Targaryen, the right place for you is not under the earth but on a dragon's back."

Alyssa looked from Daemon to Vermithor.

"I know what it's like to be lonely," she whispered to the bronze fury. This time in the common tounge. "Let's share our loneliness, yes? Maybe someday we can end it together."

When Alyssa turned, Daemon was already gone. Only Jace stood there and looked at her sadly. "I didn't know you felt this way, Alyssa. I'm sorry if we made you feel unwelcome here."

Alyssa shook her head as she stroked Vermithor's skin. "This has nothing to do with you, Jace."

He nodded. "I know it has something to do with him." He didn't have to say the name, they both knew who they were talking about. "I heard what he said to you on Driftmark. He shouldn't have done that. If you need a friend, I can be that friend for you. If you want to talk, I'll listen."

Alyssa appreciated the offer, but couldn't accept it. Jace wasn't Aemond. Nobody could take his place. At least not a human. She looked at Vermithor. Perhaps a dragon could heal the wounds in her heart.

Aemond sat in the chambers of his mother.  The queen by his side. She had given him new books to distract him.  But even the most valuable and expensive books in the world would not be able to replace what he actually wanted.  He would trade any book in the world as long as he got Alyssa for it.  

There was a knock and a servant appeared.  "The hand of the king, Your Grace." Otto Hightower, his grandfather, entered the queen's chambers.  

"Did something happen?" Alicent asked, looking from her father to her son.  Otto's gaze also slid to Aemond.  "Aemond, go to your chambers," his mother commanded.  

"No, let him stay.  This matter concerns him.”

Him ?  Really ?  Aemond had no idea what his grandfather was talking about.  He was never part of important conversations and was always dismissed from the room whenever the king or queen was talking to the hands.  

“What is it about?” his mother demanded to know.  

"We received word from Dragonstone."

Aemond's head snapped around to his grandfather.  Dragonstone?  A message from Alyssa?  Did she want to come back?  

"What message?" Alicent didn't seem nearly as hopeful as Aemond felt at that moment.  "Daemon has responded to our offer," Otto explained.  

Which offer?  Why did they write to Daemon?  

"And?" 

Otto held up a sheet of paper that a raven must have brought.  "Do you want me to read it aloud ?" 

Alicent looked worriedly from her father to Aemond, but then nodded.  Otto rolled the small scroll apart.  "My daughter claimed Vermithor, the Bronze Fury, tonight.  She is now a true Targaryen, a true dragon rider.  And as such far too good for your deviant sons.  Make me such an offer again and next time I won't send a raven to King's Landing.  Next time, Caraxes will deliver my answer, and with him fire and blood will rain down on the Hightowers. Do not send another word to me or my daughter, we both give a shit about the offers and wishes of the Greens. Daemon Targaryen,” Otto finished the letter.  

Aemond stared at the table in front of him through clenched teeth.  Mixed feelings welled up in him.  Alyssa had claimed Vermithor?  A smile tugged at Aemond's lips at the thought of Alyssa soaring through the air on the bronze fury's back.  Pride flared in his chest, probably more than he had felt with Vhagar back then.  But then his grandfather's words came to the fore.  His mother had proposed an engagement to Alyssa and sent a message to Dragonstone with an offer, and this letter was Daemon's response to that offer?  His uncle didn't think he was worthy to marry Alyssa.  Aemond clenched his fists.  He didn't think Daemon was worthy to be Alyssa's father.  She was way too good for him.  Aemond didn't understand how someone like his uncle could have produced Alyssa anyway.  That the two shared the same blood was inconceivable to him.  What did his uncle mean to stop texting them? And that Alyssa doesn't care about the Greens? She was a green!

Beside him, his mother sighed. "I suggest the king knows neither of our offer nor of Daemon's reply?"  

„Would you like me to change that?” Otto looked expectantly at his daughter.  

She shook her head.  "We don't want to start a war with Dragonstone just yet.  No, we are not doing anything for now.  Daemon sees himself as victorious because Alyssa and Vermithor are now on his side, but he is wrong.  We will not mention the offer to anyone for now.  But we'll make sure we're notified of anyone who proposes to Alyssa.  I want to know about everything and everyone.” She looked at her father promptly until he bowed his head and nodded.  Otto Hightower left the room. 

"Now may I fly to Dragonstone and burn everything down?" Daemon had threatened to do the same to King's Landing.  Aemond found it was quiet fair if he would do the same.

Alicent shook his head.  “You will do no such thing, Aemond.  You don't want to fight a war like that with Daemon, believe me.” 

Aemond raised an eyebrow.  "Then what kind of war will we wage against him?" 

Alicent gave her son a long look.  "One that will require a great deal of discipline and patience." That was when Aemond began to become a patient man. 

Neither of Alyssa and Aemond knew that they shared the same fate. They fight to get better, to get stronger and to surpass themselves. But in their quest for more, they were alone. No friend by her side to rely on, no one to talk to and surrounded by strangers.

Alyssa could talk to Baela or Rhaena, but they weren't Aemond. They didn't share the same likes and interests, and her sisters didn't understand her the way Aemond had.

Aemond had lost touch with his siblings. He was sparing all the Time with Ser Criston. Lost in her own world, Helaena prepared for her duties as a wife while Aegon spent his time in wine and whores. Neither interested Aemond. He had his family, but somehow they weren't there anyway. 

The two of them were alone and lonely. They longed for each other without admitting it. Dreamed about each other only to wake up in the middle of the night missing their best friend. And it would take time befor they would meet again. 

___________________________

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[apricia]

For ever by your side / Aemond Targaryen x reader // Part IV

Chapter 4 - Parents’ concerns

Alyssa stood on one of the observation decks, staring down at the ship that had brought her to Driftmark. The ship that would now sail back to King's Landing. Without her on board. It felt like a part of her was going to sail away with this ship and she would lose that part forever. Her heart hurt. It hurt to see her family go - or the people she had considered family.

Alyssa couldn't meet Alicent's eyes. Nor Helaenas. Even though her cousin didn't seem to understand why Alyssa wasn't returning home with them. Helaena had not been herself last night and this morning. She had said goodbye to Alyssa as if they would see each other again very soon. But that was a lie. Alyssa had no intention to return to King’s Landing.

Then a roar sounded above her. Alyssa looked up and saw two dragons. Dreamfyre and Sunfyre. There was another roar, mightier and louder than the first, and then she spotted Vhagar. Alyssa stared at the giant dragon. On his back sat the person Alyssa had fled from. The person she never wanted to see again.

In her heart, Alyssa had hoped that Aemond would come to her. That he would come to her and apologize. That he would protest that none of his words were meant seriously. That he was sorry and asked her forgiveness. But he hadn't come. He hadn't said goodbye to her. Didn't even looked at her.

Because you don't talk to ordinary whores, at least not when you're a prince of the realm, an ugly little voice whispered in Alyssa's head.

Alyssa took her eyes off Vhagar and instead stared at her shaking hands. The fresh scars stood out clearly against her skin. They were marks she would carry forever. Just as Aemond would now carry his scar forever. They both had wounds on their bodies open for all to see.

"Did he do this to you?"

A voice came from behind Alyssa and she turned around, startled.

Daemon Targaryen leaned against the wall in front of her. Arms crossed in front of his chest. He looked bored out to sea, staring after the three dragons.

"What?" Alyssa asked confused. She had not thought that he would address the word to her, yet coming to find her.

She'd already known last night that Daemon had only allowed her to go to Dragonstone with them to get at Alicent. This had absolutely nothing to do with Alyssa or Daemond's sudden fatherly feelings. Which he probably didn't even have. At least Alyssa doesn't think Daemon had them. Maybe to Rhaena and Baela, but not to her.

Daemon didn't look at her as he spoke. "The scars on your hands. Is it my nephew's fault? Had he done that to you?"

Alyssa stared from her hands back to her father. "No."

"Was it Alicent?"

"No. The Queen would never hurt me." Alyssa also wanted to defend Aemond, wanted to tell Daemon that her best friend would never hurt her, but she said nothing. Because the truth was, Aemond had hurt her more than she ever thought possible. The scars on her heart hurt more than those on her hands.

"You don't know anything about Alicent Hightower. Or her father, or her children. You're a pawn in their sick game.” Daemon looked away from the sea and looked at Alyssa. He looked bored, but his expression was serious.

Alyssa gritted her teeth. "Just like I'm a pawn in your own game. That's why you didn't contradict the princess when she invited me to Dragonstone, right?"

Daemon's mouth twitched. "Possibly. Do not overestimate your worth, however, my dear daughter. You may be blood of my blood, and my dear brother may have made you a Targaryen, but you are not."

Alyssa tried not to let those words get too close. They didn't hurt half as much as Aemond's last night. Which was just a sign that Daemon didn't mean anything to her. His words meant nothing to her.

"Don't you think I know that? I may look like a Targaryen and I carry the name but I'm not stupid. I may be a child but I'm not stupid. My mother was a whore and that makes me a bastard. But let's be honest, who cares? I carry the blood of old Valyria in me and everyone can see that at first sight. It's different with the children of the princess. I'm not saying that I doubt their origin, because honestly, I like my tongue were it is and I don't care who their father was. But looks are what people care about. They worth more than the truth."

Daemon's eyebrows rose slightly. "Maybe I underestimated you after all."

Alyssa shrugged. "And if so. That doesn't change anything either."

"Doesn't change what exactly?"

"That I won't go back to King's Landing. I accepted the princess's offer and will go to Dragonstone. Whether you will be there or not, I don't care."

There was a laugh and Alyssa looked at the prince in astonishment. "Maybe we have more in common than I thought."

"We have absolutely nothing in common," Alyssa ground out, clenching her small hands into fists. "I know what loyalty is, what responsibility means. You eluded both a long time ago."

Daemon approached her and for a brief moment Alyssa was afraid of him. He grabbed her hands and forced her fists to unclench, showing her her own palms. "Then tell me how you got those scars."

"I defended my family. And I would do it again anytime, no matter what the cost." She was proud of what she had done. Proud that she had been able to protect Helaena. Just like Alicent had said.

"Then these scars are proof that we are more alike than you care to admit, daughter." He literally spat the last word at her feet.

"Hm," Alyssa said. She would never admit that she and the man who abandoned her as a baby had anything in common.

"You're scared," Daemon stated then. She looked at him confused, not knowing what he meant. "From the way you look at those scars, the way you got them scared you. You're downright disturbed."

Of course she was scared and probably she was also disturbed, as he named it so tactlessly. She had been attacked by a stranger and had been wounded by him. Alyssa nodded slowly. "I couldn't defend myself when I had to. Those scars..." her voice cracked and she felt the tears in her eyes. "The blade might as well have slit my throat and there was nothing I could have done about it." Because she was a girl. Because she had been banned from attending Ser Criston's training.

"I'll teach you," Daemon said then.

"What?"

"Defending yourself if that's what you want."

"What else could I want?"

A grin appeared on Daemon's face and he rested a hand on his sword's hilt. Dark Sister was his name, Alyssa had read about that sword. "There is a difference between defending and attacking. There is a difference between fighting and killing."

Alyssa considered his words. She hadn't harmed the man who attacked her. She hadn't hurt him because she couldn't. Because she didn't know how. Could she have hurt him, maybe even killed him, if she had known how? Alyssa didn't know the answer to that question. But she would find out. She didn't want to be helpless anymore.

"Teach me."

"What exactly?"

"Everything."

"If you want to learn it, you should learn to say it out loud."

Alyssa took a deep breath and then looked into Daemon's eyes, which matched her own. "Teach me to defend myself. Teach me how to fight. And if I must, teach me how to kill."

He released her and turned away from her. Alyssa stayed behind, heart pounding, staring at him.

Daemon turned to her, one eyebrow raised. "What is it? Are you coming now?"

"Where?"

"We have a wedding to celebrate and you will be there. As will your halfsisters and your future stepbrothers."

Alyssa looked at him blankly. "What do you mean? Which wedding?"

"Princess Rhaenyra and I are marrying according to ancient Valyrian law. Now come."

So, starting today, Alyssa would be black and live on Dragonstone, but that wouldn't change who or what she was.

Daemon Targaryen might have fathered her, but he wasn't her father. And Alyssa wasn't his daughter. No matter what he would teach her, how he would treat her from now on, Alyssa would never forget what he has done.

King's Landing was strangely silent. Far too quiet for his taste. He'd thought the new books in the library would distract him, take his mind off things, but Aemond had been wrong. The library had seemed too quiet, too lonely. Between the countless pages of books, he had felt Alyssa's absence even more.

She had left him, simply let him down. Aemond clenched his fists. His mood seemed to affect his health. His fresh wound throbbed painfully and he felt the absence of his eye all too clearly.

Aemond hissed, hating the pain. It was worst at night. When his thoughts had time to roam. With his thoughts racing, the pain was coming. The maesters had told him to expect phantom pains from time to time. His missing eye would need time to heal. But Aemond wasn't known for his patience.

He had avoided all mirrors since the attack. Even covered those in his chambers. He didn't want to see the scar. Aegon had told him that he was no longer handsome  - if he ever was - and how difficult it would be for him to find a woman who could bear his ugly face from now on.

He was disfigured. Forever.

And it was all Luke Velaryon's fault. His own nephew had turned him into a monster. He and Jace had taken his eye and they had taken Alyssa from him. If the brothers hadn't attacked him, there would never have been a fight between him and Alyssa. His feelings wouldn't have gotten the better of him and he would never have said those words to her. Everything would have been fine.

But it wasn't.

His best friend had decided to leave King's Landing, his family and himself. Aemond remembered the tears that had flowed incessantly down her cheeks. The pain in her violet eyes. It was his words that caused this. Alyssa had cried because of him. Decided to accompany Princess Rhaenyra and her bastards to Dragonstone for his sake.

He blamed himself for it.

He blamed himself for the loss of his beloved sister's cousin and best friend. Helaena was even more silent and stranger than usual. Talked in riddles that no one understood. Helaena had asked about Alyssa several times after their arrival in the capital. As if she kept forgetting that she already knew the answer. Each time, her questions had made Aemond wince. Had reopened his wounds. Not the ones on his face, but the ones on his heart. Those wounds he would never admit to have.

He blamed himself for the loss of Aegons companion. His brother and Alyssa were not as close as himself and her, but he know that even Aegon missed their cousin. Even if he would‘t admit it. Alyssa was the only one in the family how tried to understand Aegons feelings. She laughed with him, made bets with him and she even spoke for him when the queen was angry at Aegon.

He blamed himself for the loss of his mothers daughter. Even when the two were not related, his mother had lost a daughter. Because of him. Alicent and Alyssa were close and now she was gone. He had driven Alyssa into the arms of their enemies.

He was not sorry for his father. Eben though the king seem to miss his niece as well. He took her in when Alyssa was only a baby, raised her as if she was his kin. Viserys was not a very good father to any of them, but everyone could see that the king liked his niece dearly. But he didn't do anything to stop Alyssas going. He was the king, if he only said no, Alyssa would still be by his side.

If his mother knew that it was Aemond's fault that Alyssa was gone, then his mother would hate him. And because of this hate, he was afraid to tell her the truth. 

Alyssa and Alicent were very close. His mother was probably closer to Alyssa than her own children. It had never bothered him because he had never been able to be jealous or angry with Alyssa. The warmth the queen had shown Alyssa, had automatically spread to him and his siblings. Whenever Alyssa was around it seems to him that his mother remembered her duties as a mother, she was nicer, warmer, she cared more. But now this warmth was gone.

Alicent hadn't spoken to her children for the first two days. Not even to her husband. Aemond had even heard that she had locked herself in her own chambers. But he didn't know if that was the truth or just what the servants were saying.

Whether it was the truth or not didn't matter to Aemond either.  His mother was grieving and he was the reason for it.  On the third day he couldn't take it anymore. No matter where he went, everything reminded him of Alyssa.  He had been naïve enough to think she would regret her decision and come back to them.  Realizing that she belonged at his side and not among his nephews.  But three days had passed and no ship or dragon had brought Alyssa back to him.  He went quietly to his mother's room and knocked on the door.

"My prince," Talya, his mother's maid, greeted him.  "The queen doesn't want to be disturbed."

 "Let him in, Talya," came his mother's voice.  But she sounded strangely exhausted, as if she had run for miles or screamed the hole day. His mother was still in bed, her hair was down and she was not dressed for visitors.  

"Are you ill, mother?" 

Alicent shook her head, trying to smile, but it didn't reach her eyes.  "No I'm fine.  Come here, Aemond.” She patted the covers and Aemond hesitantly walked over to her.  

Slowly, using his hands to find his way around the room.  He still had to learn to live with only one eye from now on.  His vision was limited, his perception impaired.  

"You look exhausted, mother." 

Alicent sighed and rubbed both hands over her face.  "I guess I am.  Those were tiring days.  The maesters tell me that you are making good progress.  Soon you will be able to walk, to dance and even to fight normally again.  In a few weeks you will be riding Vhagar through the air.” 

She tried to cheer him up, but he didn't deserve it.  He lay down next to her, resting his head on her chest.  Aemond felt his mother gently stroke his head.

"I miss her," he whispered without meaning to.  He hadn't wanted to admit how much it pained him to be away from Alyssa. 

 "I know," said his mother.  "I miss her, too."

Aemond felt tears welling up in his eyes and he hid his face against his mother.  "They took her away from us.  But they are not allowed to.  We have to get her back.”

"Aemond," came his mother's warning.  "Yes, they took her away from us, but I am not stupid. I may not know exactly what happened that night, but I saw in Alyssa's eyes.  I know she left for a reason.  And that reason has to do with you.” 

Aemond swallowed.  He couldn't tell his mother what he had done. "Maybe she didn't want to be near a monster anymore," he whispered.  It was of course not the real reason why Alyssa left, but it could be. Aemond doesn't know what she thought of his scar. Was she disgusted? He hoped not. But he couldn't be sure.

"What do you mean by that?" 

Aemond's lips drew into a thin line, he didn't answer.  "Aemond, look at me." He did as he was told.  "You are not a monster.  What the Velaryon boys did to you was not your fault, and had it been up to me, they would have been punished.  You lost your eye, but that doesn't make you any less valuable and it certainly doesn't make you a monster.” Alicent swiped his cheek.  Ran her fingers over the scar.  Aemond only realized he was crying when his mother wiped away the tears.  "Alyssa doesn't see you as a monster any more than I do.  Do you understand me?"

Aemond bit his lower lip but nodded.

"Tell me. What happened? Did you two fight? Did she do something or did you say something to her?" Alicent sounded as desperate as Aemond felt.

He shook his head. "No, mother." The lie tasted bitter on his tongue.

"Aemond, I can't fix it if I don't know what happened. So talk to me."

He could not. Couldn't bring himself to tell her the truth. He didn't want to see the disappointment on his mother's face like he had seen on Alyssa's face. He was ashamed of what he had said to her. Deeply.

Alicent sighed and pushed Aemond away. "Either you learn to live without her or you find a way to make things right with her. But whatever you decide, Alyssa is gone for now. She is with Daemon and Rhaenyra and they will leave no stone unturned, to get her on their side. Do you understand what I'm telling you?"

Aemond nodded. He wasn't a fool like his brother. He understood the feud between his family and that of the princess. If Rhaenyra were to sit on the throne after his father, Aegon and his own life would be a threat to her reign. They were legitimate sons of the king and had the same right to rule as the princess.

"Alyssa may only be half Targaryen and without your father she would be little more than a bastard, but she has the blood of old Valyria in her, as will her children. Daemon and Rhaenyra know that."

"The blood must be pure."

"Yes, that's why we engaged your brother to your sister."

Aemond looked at his mother. "Then you want an engagement between me and Alyssa?"

"It was always a possibility, yes."

Aemond's heart beat faster. That was exactly what he always wanted. He only wanted two things. He wanted to be a dragon rider and Alyssa should stand by his side.

"Your joy is unfounded, my dear son. Alyssa is gone. Now that I am no longer responsible for her, I will not be able to decide who she will marry one day.  Now it's up to Daemon Targaryen to decide. Many will come and ask for her hand. And if you want Alyssa as your wife, we're going to have to send an official offer like everyone else. And believe me, your uncle would rather cut off both of his hands than marry one of his daughters to one of my sons."

"But-"

"There are no buts, Aemond. The time will come when we will be at war and every one of those named Targaryen will have a part to play in this fight. Alyssa too."

Aemond's heart clenched at his mother's harsh words.

"No matter what you or she did, Alyssa can't be on our side when living under the same roof as Daemon and Rhaenyra.” 

"But she belongs to our family, not to theirs."

Alicent nodded. "I know that. She's one of us. But you made sure that wasn't the case anymore."

Aemond looked down in shame. His mother was right. It was his fault she was gone. “What can we do?" he then asked quietly.

Alicent narrowed his eyes. A dark shadow crossed her face. "I will make sure that Alyssa returns to our family. Maybe she will come back of her own accord, maybe she needs time. If she doesn't, I will make sure that she finds her way back to her true family."

"Can't we get her back right now, mother?" He didn't want to go another night or another day without his best friend. The last three had already been too much. He needed Alyssa.

Alicent sadly shook his head. "My hands are tied."

"I can get her back. I'll take Vhagar, fly to Dragonstone and bring her back."

"And what if she doesn't want to come? What if Daemon won't let her go, or Rhaenyra has already wrapped her around her finger ?"

Aemond pressed his lips together and his hands became fists. "They won't take her away from me."

Alicent looked at her son in silence. She had always known there was a strong bond between Aemond and Alyssa. But they were children, playmates. Now her son spoke like a grown man who would take back what had been taken from him.

"If they don't return her voluntarily, I will burn down Dragonstone and everyone who lives there. Vhagar will be happy to help me."

Alicent smiled at her son and ruffled his silvery white hair. "Patience, my son. It is not yet the time for fire and blood. We are not yet at war. Now it is time to light the way”, Alicent echoed her own houses words. 

„They’re not going to hurt her, are they?“

Alicent shook his head. "No, they won't. Although I hate to admit it, she's safe on Dragonstone. Nothing will happen to her there."

That only reassured Aemond in moderation. Who dared to hurt Alyssa he would feed them to Vhagar. But he didn't want to wait for Alyssa to come back to them or for his mother to get her.

He wanted her to be here now. Instantly!

Alicent saw the anger on Aemond's face. "Be aware of what you want, Aemond. Your brother will need you, as will your sister and our entire family."

"I want Alyssa."

"I know. And you shall have her. But first you have to prove yourself worthy of her."

Aemond made a face. Hadn't he already done that? He had claimed Vhagar, the largest dragon in the whole world. She was now under his command. Who could be more worthy of Alyssa than him?

"I have Vhagar."

The queen let out a bitter laugh. "And do you think that will impress Alyssa? Or her Daemon?" Alicent shook his head. "Daemon won't give a shit if you fly Vhagar or any other dragon. He'll marry Alyssa off for political machinations and alliances. And you will not be his first choice or any choice of him."

Anger flared up in Aemond. What had he gone through all this for, even sacrificed an eye, if he wasn't supposed to have Alyssa after all? That was not fair!

"And what must I do to be worthy of her?"

A smile crossed Alicent's face. "Be the man she needs, the man she deserves. You're not a man yet, but soon you will be. And then you'll know what to do."

Aemond frowned blankly. He didn't know what his mother meant. She hadn't answered his question to his satisfaction. He still didn't know what he had to do to prove himself worthy of Alyssa.

But he would find out.

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[apricia]

For ever by your side / Aemond Targaryen x reader // Part III

Chapter 3 - Words cut deeper than knifes

“It will heal, will it not, maester?” Queen Alicent asked warily. She looked down at her son who was being examined. Her hands folded in her lap. The worry on her face.

Everyone had gathered in the great hall after the shouting. The men of the Kings guard had taken the children and immediately informed the king. Alyssa stood to one side, still trembling all over.

“The flesh will heal, but the eye is lost, Your Grace.” He answered.

When chaos broke out and the queen and king wanted to know what had happened, all the children screamed at the same time. Shifting the blame from one to the other. Alyssa stood by silently.

“Accident?” The Queen asked in disbelief, “The Prince Lucerys brought a blade to the ambush. He meant to kill my son.” It was the first thing that got through the fog in Alyssa's head.

That wasn't right. She didn't think Jace wanted to kill Aemond. But what was said, what was done, could not be undone anyway. 

“The legitimacy of my childrens’ birth was put loudly to question.” Rheanyra looked from Jace, to Aemond und back to Alicent. As if she know who was the reason for those insults.

“What?”, demanded King Viserys to know. 

Alyssa looked up to her cousin. He was looking at his grandfather, then to his mother. „He called us bastards“, Jace began, then his eyes found the one of Alyssa. „And he called Alyssa..“ She quickly shook her head. So made Jace fall silent. She didn't want to hear the words again. No matter by whom. She didn't want to get involved any further. For her it was enough. 

Jace said nothing more, but gave her a pitying look before glancing back at his mother.

Alyssa was once again engulfed in the fog in her head. Aemond's words repeated over and over in her mind. Opening up wounds she hadn't known existed. Broke her heart. Again and again. 

“This interminable infighting must cease!“, the king screamed and Alyssa looked to him. „All of you! We are family! Now make your apologies and show good will to one another. Your father, your grandsire, your King demands it!” He ordered before her started towards the door to retreat back to his chambers.

“That is insufficient,” Alicent stopped her husband in his tracks, “Aemond has been damaged permanently, My King. Good will cannot make him whole.”

“I know, Alicent. But I cannot restore his eye.”

“No because it’s been taken.”

“What would you have me do?” He asks her angrily.

“There is a debt to be paid. I shall have one of her son’s eyes in return.” The room broke into murmuring at the Queen’s extreme request.

Alyssa held her breath. She had never seen the queen like this before. Not after attacking her and Heleana, not after all the things Aegon had done. She had never seen such hatred in Alicent's eyes. She understood the queen's anger, but she still didn't want any more bloodshed. That other wounds were inflicted, whether of the body or the soul.

“My dear wife,” Viserys started sternly.

“He is your son Viserys!” She cried, “Your blood!”

“Do not allow your temper to guide your judgement.” Viserys warned her, turning to leave again. 

"I cannot tolerate that. Justice should prevail. Even in a place like this. I demand justice and then we will leave this place. First thing in the morning, my children and I will return to King's Landing. Aegon, Helaena, Aemond, Alyssa, pack your bags, we“, the queen looked around. As if she was only realizing at that moment that one of her children was missing. Even if Alyssa wasn't one of them. „Where's Alyssa?"

It was the first time Alyssa had been approached tonight. No adult had taken care of her before, or cared what was happening to her or how she was doing. Outwardly she might not have sustained any injuries, but inside she was empty.

"I'm here." Her voice was no louder than a whisper, but the queen turned to her immediately and inseminated her for injuries.

When she couldn't find any, she breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank the gods. Come here, child. We will go home right after just punishment has been given for what happened.“

Home... Was King's Landing still her home after tonight? Alyssa doubt she would be welcome there much longer. That she could even go back there.

She felt tears welling up in her eyes again. She didn't want to cry, not again. Not in front of the queen and the entire court. Not in Front of Aemond.

"I don't want to go," she then said quietly. However, she did not dare raise her head.

"How do you mean that?"

"I don't want to go to King's Landing."

"What are you talking about, child? We're going home, all together." Alicent knelt in front of her and put a hand on her shoulder, but Alyssa took a step back as if the queen had struck her.

Now the tears were streaming down her cheeks and Alyssa couldn't do anything to stop them. "Please don't make me go back there," she begged softly to Alicent, who gave her a horrified look.

"Alyssa.." Alicent whispered, her eyes widening as she saw the girl's tears. "What happened?"

Alyssa just shook her head silently, tears streaming down her face. She pressed her hands tightly into her dress. She wanted to throw herself into Alicent's arms, wanted to feel the security of the woman who was like a mother to her. But that was a lie. Alicent wasn't her mother. And Viserys was not her father.

Now the king stepped forward. "Alyssa, what happened? Why don't you want to go to King's Landing?"

"I..I," she stammered, but couldn't find the right words.

"It's your home," the queen said, looking at Alyssa sadly.

"No it is not." She had no home. Not anymore. She had no mother, she had no father, she had nothing.

"Alyssa, what happened? So talk to me."

What should she say? Should she tell the queen what Aemond had said to her? Aemond was Alicent's son. She would always be on his side. No matter what he said or did. Too many times she had seen Alicent siding with Aegon, covering up his missteps just because he was blood of her blood. But she wasn't.

She slowly raised her eyes, but instead of looking at the queen, she looked at Aemond. He sat in the chair in front of the fire and observed the situation. His expression was tense, his hands gripping the back of the chair tightly. Despite the scar that now adorned his face, Alyssa could see the shock in his eye. Was he afraid she would betray him? That she would told what had happened?

Alyssa would love to do that, but she couldn't. She couldn't repeat his words, couldn't admit how he had hurt her. That he had betrayed her and their friendship. That he broke her heart. She couldn't put it into words, couldn't summon up the courage to say it out loud. But the pain reverberated throughout her body.

Alicent looked from Aemond to Alyssa and frowned in confusion. She looked at Viserys and shrugged helplessly.

Visyers sighed. "Whatever happened, we're all going home tomorrow. You too, Alyssa, I'm sure we'll find a solution."

Her fist tightened on the fabric of her dress and a sob escaped her. She was ashamed. Ashamed that Aemond's words afflicted her so much that she cried like a small child in front of the king and queen.

"I won't come with you," she insisted, but her voice was broken and barely above a whisper.

"That's absurd," Alicent groaned, but she wasn't angry, just worried and didn't know what to do. "Where do you want to go instead?"

That question was like another slap in the face. Alyssa sobbed again and wiped her runny nose with the back of her hand.

Alyssa turned her head and looked into the eyes of Rheanys and Corlys Velaryon, from them to Beala and Rheana. Right next to them stood Jace and Luke. But Alyssa couldn't see any further, she didn't dare to look at the person who should have been standing by her side. He wasn't her father, just her sire, and yet, at that moment, Alyssa prayed to all the gods that Daemon Targaryn would help her. But he didn't.

"She's coming to Dragonstone with us," a voice said. But it wasn't her father's, it was Princess Rheanyra's. Alyssa looked at her cousin in astonishment.

The princess was still holding Luke's hands and by her side was Daemon, who also looked at her in astonishment.

"What?" Alyssa and Alicent asked simultaneously.

"Alyssa can come with us to Dragonstone. She is very welcome there."

"No, she certainly won't," Alicent's voice thundered through the room and she rose to face Rheanyra. The entire room seemed to hold its breath as the two women came close to attacking each other.

"She's not your daughter, Alicent. She’s mine. You don't decide her fate." Daemon Targaryen stepped forward, satisfaction showing on his face as he sided with the princess.

Alicent let out a hysterical laugh. "Oh, now she's your daughter? What was the last eleven years, Daemon? Did you tought about her just once while you start a new family?“

Alyssa closed her eyes. She didn't want to hear the queen's words, her heart was broken enough anyway. She wouldn't take any more cuts. But she knew the queen was right. Daemon had never been a father to her, she was never his daughter.

"I haven't taken care of Alyssa yet, you may be right in this case, Alicent, so it's time I did my duty."

Alicent shook his head and looked at the king invitingly. "No, you won't take her with you." She grabbed Alyssa and pulled her to her.

Alyssa loved Alicent, she was the only mother figure she knew and her words touched Alyssq deeply. But that didn't change Alyssa's decision. She would not stay in King's Landing.

"Alicent," Viserys murmured, looking back and forth between Daemon and his wife. A sad look on his face. "Daemon is her father. If he decides to take Alyssa with him, there's nothing we can do."

Alicent turned on her husband in anger. "You are the king, Viserys. She belongs to us, to our family!" An apologetic expression came over the king's face. And Alicent knew that today she would lose to his daughter for the second time.

Alyssa couldn't stop crying. Maybe she would never be able to stop again.

"She's part of our family too," Rheanyra then said, smiling at Alyssa. "If she wants that."

It seemed to Alyssa that all eyes in the room were on her. As if she had to make a decision that would change not only her life but the whole world forever.

„No“, no," Alicent yelled. "You mutilated my son, you will not take my daughter from me. I will not allow you to take Alyssa."

Daemon looked at the queen in amusement. "You won't be able to prevent it."

Alicent whirled on her husband. "Say something, Viserys. Speak for your son, for your niece." For me, resonated weakly in her tear-choked voice.

But Viserys said nothing.

“If the King will not seek justice the Queen will. Daemon has no claim to his daughter, he already rejected her after her birth. And as for the other...Ser Criston, bring me the eye of Lucerys Velaryon.” Alicent ordered.

Alyssa's eyes widened and she stared at the queen in disbelief. Was she serious? Did she really demand that Luke sacrifice an eye because Aemond lost his?

That couldn't be true.

“He can choose which eye to keep, a privilege which he did not grant my son. And if Daemon try to lay a hand on Alyssa, cut them off.”

“You will do no such thing,” Rhaenyra said firmly.

“Stay your hand,” Viserys ordered Ser Criston.

“No, you are sworn to me!” Alicent yelled.

Ser Criston hesitated for a moment, “As your protector, my Queen. And I will protect the princess as well, if she would be in danger. But she‘s not.“

“Alicent, this matter is finished. Do you understand?” The King asked her sternly. He began to walk away again, stopping to make one more announcement, “And let it be known, anyone whos tongue dares to question the birth of Princess Rhaenyra’s children should have it removed. As for Alyssa's concerns, it is up to her father to determine her whereabouts.” A sad expression came into the king's eyes as he looked at his niece.

“Thank you Father,” Rhaenyra told him.

Alyssa thought the matter was settled now. Though she didn't know what that meant for her. Daemon only laid claim to her because he wanted to undermine Alicent.

Where would she live from now on? What would happen to her?

Her thoughts were cut short when Alicent let out a yell, pulled a dagger from Visery's belt, and charged at Rheanyra, knife raised.

Chaos broke out and shouts erupted.

The two women fought with each other, the Kingsguard tried to separate them. Alyssa watched in horror. Prayed to the gods that Alicent would stop and that she wouldn't get hurt.

Alicent suddenly pushed herself away from Rhaenyra sending the Princess stumbling back into Lord Corlys Arms. She clutched her forearm, from which a red line ran down. Blood. It was already dripping onto the floor of the hall.

The room was eerily quiet. You could probably have heard a pin drop. Alyssa looked from Alicent to the princess in fear. But her gaze fell on Aemond as he got up and ran to his mother.

“Do not mourn me, Mother. It was a fair exchange. I may have lost an eye but I gained a dragon.” At the end of his sentence, a hurt look crossed his face and he looked at Alyssa. She just looked at him silently, tears still in her eyes. He hadn't just lost an eye and claimed a dragon tonight. He had lost her, her friendship, everything.

But even though Alyssa thought she saw something like regret in his eyes, he said nothing. No apologetic words, he didn't even look at her anymore.

In that moment, Alyssa realized that she really had lost. That she had lost everything she had known in her life.

"What about Alyssa?" the Queen asked, while hugging Aemond.

Alyssa looked at Viserys, who had a hand on Alicent's shoulder. The queen looked at her silently, almost pleadingly. Rheanyra gave her a friendly smile while Daemon looked at her wordlessly, waiting. And although she didn't want to, her gaze wandered to Aemond. He was already looking at her. His remaining eye wide open, as if he couldn't comprehend what was happening. What Alyssa was about to do.

Alyssa took a step towards Alicent, who breathed a sigh of relief and hugged her. But Alyssa just put a hand on her cheek. "Thank you for everything. But I can't stay, it's not your fault," she whispered in the queen's ear and she looked again at Aemond, as if to say it's his. He seemed to have heard her words. He looked away and Alyssa saw his jaw clench.

Alicent looked stunned from Alyssa to her son, then slowly shook her head. Like begging Alyssa to reconsider her decision.

Alyssa took a step back and then looked at Rheanyra. "If you like, princess, I would accept your offer. I want to go to Dragonstone.“

The decision had been made. Alyssa Targaryen would no longer live in the capital. Wouldn't grow up next to her cousins ​​anymore. Wouldn't talk to Helaena about spiders, scorpions or other insects. Would no longer bet and fool around with Aegon. But much more important was that she didn't have to see Aemond anymore. They would no longer spend time together in the library, would not study, discuss, or philosophize together. No more sneaking out, no more telling secrets. Nothing more. The vow of for Ever by your side, forgotten.

She had been a Green, taken in by Alicent like a daughter of her own, but that was over.

From now on, Alyssa would be a black.

_________

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[apricia]

For ever by your side / Aemond Targaryen x reader // Part II

Chapter 2 - About bastards and whores

It has been days since the princesses were attacked and the incident in the dragon pit. Alyssa didn't tell Aemond about her injuries. Even if she knows full well that he has now found out what happened. She can tell by the way he looks at her. The way he looks at anyone who even dares to approach her. He's tense, like he's lying in wait, ready to pounce on anyone who wants to harm her.

The cuts on her palms have mostly healed and she can use her hands again. But the scars stand out clearly against her fair skin.

Aemond was by her side the whole time. Until they received word that Lady Laena Velaryon had passed away. Her father's wife. Alyssa had never met either of them. All she knew was that her father had married Lady Laena shortly after she was born and gone away with her. She knew from Aegon that she now had two half-sisters, Baela and Rhaena. But even though she knew of her sisters' existence, she had never heard a word from them. Did they know they had a half sister across the straits? Had Deamon told his wife and children that he had another daughter in King's Landing? Alyssa would have loved to know the answers to these questions. Inwardly she prayed that Laena and her daughters were ignorant. It would hurt less if the three Velaryons were unaware of her existence and therefore had never bothered with her.

And now they were on their way to Driftmark for the funeral.

After eleven years, Alyssa would see her father for the first time. She would recognize him, that much was certain. After all, Daemon was a Targaryen and unmistakable.

Not having dragons like Aegon and Helaena, Alyssa and Aemond stood on the deck of the ship that would take them to Driftmark.

They stood by the rail and watched the other two Targaryens on their dragons.

"Do you want to talk about the matter in the dragon pit?" Alyssa asked softly, seeing the somber expression on Aemond's face.

He looked at her. "Do you want to talk about the attack on you?"

Alyssa shook her head. She definitely didn't want to talk about that. Since that day, her nights have been short. She was plagued by nightmares. In each of them she could see the man, feel his breath on her face, his stench. Then she felt the blade against her skin. Felt the pain and woke up screaming.

She felt Aemond's hand on hers. He squeezed her lightly, just very gently, careful not to hurt her or reopen the wounds.

Alyssa smiled at him and rested her head on his shoulder. She was glad that they understood each other without words.

So much had happened in the past few days. Not just the attack on her, Aemond's humiliation, but also an incident at the training ground. An altercation between Ser Criston Cole and Ser Harwin Strong. The two men got into a fight, after which Ser Harwin was banished from the City Watch and soon returned to Harren Hall with his father, the Hand of the King. Now they were both dead.

Princess Rheanyra and her husband Ser Laenor have returned to Dragonstone. The entire family left King's Landing. Alyssa didn't know what to make of it. Even though Luke and Jace often got on her nerves and she hated the way they treated Aemond, she had enjoyed being surrounded by such a large family. But now they were gone.

She would see them again in Driftmark.

"I'm scared," Alyssa then said quietly. She could stand to her feelings in front of Aemond.

She felt his gaze on her. „Of what? Of the funeral? You know it's not yours, right?" He tried to cheer her up with jokes.

Alyssa rolled her eyes. "If it was my funeral, you wouldn't be able to feel this," she said, playfully punching his shoulder.

"No," she continued. "I `m afraid of him."

"Whom?"

Alyssa lifted her head and looked into Aemond's face. Awareness showed on his. "Oh," he just made. "You don't have to talk to him if you don't want to."

"What if I want to but he doesn't?"

Daemon Targaryen had abandoned her when she was just a baby. He hadn't looked after her in eleven years and probably wouldn't in the future either.

"Then he's an idiot."

"Aemond-" Alyssa began but was interrupted by her cousin.

"What? I'm just telling the truth. My uncle is a fool. He didn't want you, now it's his own fault. You belong with us, not with him."

A smile appeared on her face. He didn't have to tell her where she belonged. Alyssa already knew that.

"I don't care if he's your father or not. You're a Targaryen and you belong in King's Landing. Daemon can stay in the hole he chose as his home."

"Thank you," she whispered, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Not for that," Aemond replied.

"I love it," Alyssa said after they had stood silently for a while.

"What do you mean?"

"The sea. Isn't it beautiful?"

Aemond stared at the waves crashing against the ship and shrugged. "I prefer the sky". His gaze slid upward as the two Dragons flew. Alyssa was aware that he wasn't really referring to the sky itself.

"They have one thing in common."

"What?"

"The sea and the sky. They both are of the most beautiful and intense blue. I love the colour."

"Sea blue or sky blue?" Aemond teased, knowing full well that they were two completely different colors.

Alyssa thought about it. Blue had always been her favorite color and she found it a pity that her clothes were mostly green or red. "Neither nor."

"What shade of blue would you choose then?"

"The one of sapphires," she said immediately. She had seen such stones. Princess Rheanyra owned a necklace of sapphires, inherited from her mother, Queen Aemma Arryn and the color of House Arryn was blue.

Aemond smiled at her. "I'll give you sapphires. Earrings, necklaces, whatever you want."

Alyssa laughed at his words. "You don't have to give me anything. I'm a princess, if I want sapphires, I'll get them."

She sounded like a spoiled brat, she knew that. But it was the truth. Only she wore no jewelry. It was usually too heavy for her or just in her way when she was runnig through the keep. Aemond narrowed his eyes. "So if I gave you a necklace with a sapphire, you wouldn't accept it?"

"Only if they are from you."

She wouldn't accept anything from anyone else. She might only be eleven, but Alyssa had understood that when a man gave jewelry to a woman, he claimed her as his property. Alyssa didn't belong to anyone. Only to Aemond.

A satisfied look crossed Aemond's face and he grinned. Alyssa punched him in the shoulder again. "Don't you give me a necklace for my next name day. Otherwise I'll strangle you with it."

Aemond let out a laugh and pulled Alyssa close. She loved his closeness. Not knowing that she would soon lose him.

At the funeral, Alyssa stood close to Aemond. Aegon stood behind her. Her older cousin seemed bored with the funeral. Alyssa, however, couldn't help but keep looking at Rhaena, Baela, and Daemon. None of them had even looked at her before. But Alyssa tried not to think too much about it. Her half sisters had just lost their mother and their father his wife. They were in mourning. And Alyssa couldn't help them with that. She didn't know what it was like to lose someone she cared about. She hadn't known either Daemon or her mother, so she couldn't have missed them either. It was normal for her to go to her uncle, King Viserys or even Alicent when she needed or wanted to know something.

She watched her father. Watched him chuckle at the words of Vaemond Velaryon. Alyssa just didn't understand why.

Still, she couldn't take her eyes off Daemon. As if she were magically attracted to him.

When Lady Laena was handed over to the sea, the mourners gathered on the terrace. Alyssa followed the queen and her children. Her half-sisters walked alongside their grandmother, Princess Rhaenys. Alyssa had never spoken to her either, although she had met her more often. They shared the same blood, but nothing more.

"Do you think I should talk to them? Offer them my condolences?" she asked softly to Aemond.

He followed her gaze and looked at Rhaena and Baela.

"I don't know. Would you accept condolences from someone you've never met?"

Alyssa didn't know the answer to that question, so she stayed where she was.

There was a strong wind on the terrace. He tasted of salt and sea. The mood more than depressing.

She stood at the edge with Aegon and Aemond. While she was disconnected and watching her sisters, the two brothers started a conversation. 

"We have nothing in common," said Aegon, who had just been engaged to his sister. Princess Helaena sat on the floor and let a spider run down her hands. Mumbled incomprehensible words to herself.

"She's our sister," Aemond said, trying to defend Helaena. He liked his sister and it wasn't fair the way Aegon talked about her. But most of all, he knew how close Alyssa and Helaena were. They were like sisters.

Aegon looked at his younger brother in disgust. "You marry her then."

"I would've performed my duty if mother had betrothed us," Aemond replied, although the idea of being married to his sister put him off. Not because of Helaena, but because of Alyssa. He didn't want to marry his sister, he wanted her.

A grin on Aegon's face. "Oh, would you? Even if it meant you couldn't have Alyssa? We can switch, little brother. You marry our sister and I'll have Alyssa. Since you're so dutiful, I'm sure you wouldn't mind."

And how Aemond objected. He glared at his brother and pressed his fingers into the fabric of his robes. Aegon would never have Alyssa. She was way too good for him. Actually Helaena was too, but Aemond couldn't do anything about that.

Aemond's jaw clenched tightly before answering his brother.

"Your marriage to our sister would strengthen the family. Keep our Valyrian blood pure." Just like a bond between Aemond and Alyssa would.

"She's an idiot," Aegon hissed at him, looking at Helaena in disgust, who was still handling the spider.

Aemond glared at his brother. "She's your future queen." That's not how you talked about your future wife or about women in general. Aemond would never talk about Alyssa like that, even if it wasn't certain that he would ever marry her.

"We actually do have one thing in common," Aegon then said, taking a cup of wine from one of the servants, whom he looked at with lustful eyes.

"We both fancy creatures with very long legs," Aegon laughed at his own joke, but Aemond just grimaced in disgust. Aegon took a generous sip from his mug and then slapped his brother on the back.

"If you really should marry Alyssa, then consider yourself lucky, brother."

As if Aemond didn't know that himself, but something about the way Aegon grinned, Aemond could say they were talking about different things.

"What do you want to say?"

A wide grin appeared on Aegon's face. "Think about it, Aemond. Alyssa's mother was a whore. Probably a very pretty whore, given the looks of Alyssa and considering that a prince would hardly want the company of an ugly whore."

Aemond looked at his brother with wide eyes.

"Alyssa may have get Daemon's looks, but she may also have inherited her mother's talent. I'm sure she was fantastic in bed. Alyssa probably will be too. After a little practice, at least. You could help her with that . Of course, for that you would need to know how to fuck properly first. But you're going to learn that."

Aemond clenched his hands into fists. He hated the way his brother talked about Alyssa. Like she's a regular whore. She was a Targaryen princess, their cousin.

"It's a pity Alyssa's mother is dead. Apparently she has a fondness for Targaryens. I might have sought her out as well. She might have taught me something useful. Too bad she was a common whore and died like a common whore. Lonely and alone in the filthy streets of Fleabottom."

Aemond had never seen Alyssa in the way Aegon was implying. He didn't care who or what Alyssa's mother had been. He hadn't known the woman, any more than Alyssa had known her.

"So if it comes to an engagement between the two of you, brother, promise me you'll give me details. I'll probably have little to report to Helaena in that regard."

Aegon laughed out loud and then just walked away from his little brother. Aemond looked after him, shaking his head. "Oh Aegon."

Rhaena and Baela sat together on a bench, staring straight ahead. Alyssa gathered all her courage and approached the two sisters. To her sisters.

When she stopped in front of them, both of them lifted their heads and looked at her. There was sadness in her eyes, but also curiosity about the girl who was now standing in front of them.

Alyssa cleared her throat and fiddled with the hem of her robes. "I am very sorry about what happened to your mother. I am sure that she was a kind woman and her loss must pain you greatly." Alyssa fell silent, not knowing what else to say. Should she perhaps introduce herself first? Did they even know who she was? "I don't know what it's like to lose a mother I didn't know my own but I'm still sorry for you both."

Baela and Rhaena exchanged a quick look as if in silent communication. Then Rhaena reached out to Alyssa.

Alyssa held her breath, looked from one sister to the other, and then took Rhaena's outstretched hand. Her sister's fingers were cold compared to Alyssa's.

They stood like that for a while, the cool sea air around them, but the three girls exchanged comfort and warmth.

Then Princess Rhaenys appeared and wanted to speak to her granddaughters. The princess looked at Alyssa, smiling softly down at her. Alyssa knew she was unwanted. That Rhaenys, Rhaena and Baela shared a pain she couldn't feel herself. She squeezed Rhaena's hand again, smiled at Baela and left.

As she left, her eyes immediately sought out Aemond. He was standing by a brazier, directly across from Jace. Alyssa saw Aemond give his nephew an encouraging smile, but Jace didn't return it. Aemond's smile faded. Alyssa intercepted his path and grabbed his hand. She smiled at him and Aemond smiled weakly back.

"You spoke to them," he stated quietly.

Alyssa nodded. "I did. And they don't seem to hate me."

"Why would they hate you? Nobody could hate you, Alyssa."

She bit her lower lip. Alyssa wasn't so sure about that, after all her own father had abandoned her. And even now, Daemon Targaryen had made no move to approach his daughter.

Aemond pulled her close as a roar was heard overhead. Vhagar circled the sky. She was the largest and oldest living dragon and had belonged to the late Lady Laena. Now Vhagar was riderless.

Aemond looked from Vhagar to Alyssa, whom he was holding. Agon's words flashed through his mind. Not the ones from before, but the ones he had said to him in the dragon pit.

Only a dragon rider could have a Targaryen princess like Alyssa. Only someone with a dragon could marry her.

As Aemond watched Vhagar leave, Alyssa's eyes fell on her father, who was speaking to King Viserys.

She stepped closer to the two men, careful not to be noticed by either of them.

"It's time you came home," Viserys was saying.

"Pentos is my home and that of my children."

"Daemon. Pentos is not the home of all your children. I know we've had our differences, but let them pass with the years. There is a place for you in my council, it that's something you should need."

An angry expression appeared on Daemon's face and his eyes darted around. Found Alyssa. He looked at her without a word.

"I need nothing."

Viserys followed Daemond's gaze and he spotted Alyssa and Aemond. Aemond grabbed Alyssa's hand and squeezed it tightly. She could feel the pain of her fresh wounds, but the pain inside was worse.

"You shouldn't have taken her, brother."

"She is your daughter."

"I suppose she is."

Daemon left his brother, not even looking at Alyssa as he stormed down the stairs to the beach.

Viserys walked up to Alyssa, put a hand on her shoulder and looked at her sadly. "I'm sorry, child. Come on, let's go inside."

Alyssa only realized tears were streaming down her cheeks when Viserys wiped them away with his free hand. With the other he braced himself on his cane.

Aemond looked at Alyssa, hating to see the pain in her eyes, and angrily left Daemon behind. How dare he hurt her?

Viserys announced that he was going to bed with Alyssa by his side. She needed the comfort of her uncle, who had been more of a father to her all her life than her own.

"Is it ok if I go inside? I can stay with you if you want."

Aemond looked at her in surprise, shaking his head. "Go to bed, rest. I promise everything will be fine." He would see to that personally.

Aemond squeezed Alyssa's hand again before letting her go. He wouldn't let anyone hurt her again. His eyes searched the sky. Searched for the one thing he needed to make Alyssa happy forever. He needed Vhagar.

While his brother downed copious amounts of wine and could barely stand up, Aemond watched as their grandfather, Otto Hightower, pulled him to his feet and sent him to bed. Aegon was too drunk to argue.

This was Aemond's chance.

He couldn't see Vhagar, but he heard her shouts. Her roar. As if it meant him. As if she wanted him to find her. 

Alyssa didn't get any sleep that night. Too many thoughts went through her head. So she did the only thing that always helped her: she looked for Aemond. On tiptoe and still in her nightgown, she left her room and crept across the hall to his. She didn't knock, just opened the door and walked in.

"Aemond?" she asked quietly, but received no answer.

She went to the bed. It was untouched. A deep crease appeared on Alyssa's face and concern spread through her. Where was he?

There was a roar and Alyssa rushed to the window. She saw Vhagar fly across the night sky. She flew. With a rider.

"You didn't do that..." Alyssa whispered, already guessing who was sitting on the dragon's back. With hasty steps she ran through the corridors of Driftmark, down the path that connected the castle to the beach that Aemond would sooner or later have to take. Should he survive the flight with the oldest dragon in the world. Alyssa prayed to every god she knew.

He did it!

He had claimed Vhagar. The oldest and most powerful dragon in the world. No matter how scared he'd been, no matter how many times he'd wanted to turn back, he'd done it. And he had been successful. Vhagar was his now.

He had the dragon, now all he needed was the girl.

First thing in the morning he would ask his mother if he could marry Alyssa. If he had the courage, he would first ask his cousin what she thought of it. But it was Alyssa he was talking about. He was even more connected to her than he was now to Vhagar. She would agree.

Syt mirre ondoso aōha paktot. That was her vow and it meant everything to both of them!

As he left Vhagar and made his way up into the castle, a figure was already coming towards him.

"Aemond," he heard Alyssa's familiar voice.

A big smile appeared on his face.

"Alyssa, I did it."

She stopped right in front of him, her worried gaze roving his body, searching for any injuries.

"What do you mean?" Alyssa wanted to know and grabbed his hand. It was cold, probably from his first flight with Vhagar. At least in this, Aegon was right: the first flight could be rough.

Aemond wanted to tell Alyssa everything. How he had claimed Vhagar, how afraid he had been, how the flight had been. That he was finally a dragon rider worthy of a Tagaryen princess.

But his joy and excitement was cut short when a scream rang out.

"It's him," Rhaena's scream came through the dark corridor. Her gaze shifted from Aemond to Alyssa, examining her nightgown and deciding that her sister couldn't possibly have flown Vhagar in that outfit. So the culprit must have been Aemond.

Aemond glared at the girl. Who just interrupted an important conversation.

"Yeah, it's me." He was filled with pride when he spotted his nephews behind Daemon's daughters. Luke and Jace wouldn't be able to tease him anymore. He had Vhagar. Vermax and Arrax were nothing compared to his own dragon.

Alyssa looked around between her half sisters and her best friend. She felt deep down that this conversation would not end well.

"Vhagar was my mother's dragon," one of the girls said.

Alyssa looked at Aemond. The timing of him claiming Vhagar was more than inauspicious. Although she was proud of him and heartily happy for him, she also understood why her sisters were upset. Why they were angry. Because it was not only anger, it was grief. 

"Your mother is dead," Aemond blurted out and Alyssa looked at him with a horrified expression.

"Aemond," she hissed, nudging his shoulder. "Stop it."

Aemond looked at Alyssa, nodding slightly. He didn't want her to be mad at him, but he didn't really care about Rhaena and Baela's feelings.

“Vhagar has a new rider now.” He looked at Alyssa, pride adorning his face, and he took her hand.

"You really did it," Alyssa whispered, smiling at him. She squeezed his hand.

That was the moment he knew that his fear and everything he had done had not been in vain.

"She was mine to claim," came a yell from the other side.

Alyssa and Aemond looked at the two girls at the same time. 

"Then you should have claimed her.“ Aemond looked from the girl to Luke and Jace. Jace, in turn, looked at Aemond's and Alyssa's clasped hands. As if he knew exactly why Aemond had claimed the dragon.

"All for her," Jace murmured, and Aemond blushed.

"Maybe your cousins will find you a pig to ride. It would suit you."

Alyssa nudged his shoulder again at his mean words. He was allowed to be proud of himself, but not put others down.

With an angry yell, Rhaena charged at Aemond, fists raised, ready to lunge at him.

"Watch out," Aemond called, pushing Alyssa out of the way so that she fell to the ground. Rhaena's punch hit him and he heard Alyssa scream his name. The girl's blow staggered him, but he stayed on his feet. Anger coursed through his veins. Without thinking about it, he swung back and punched Rhaena in his turn.

Rhaena fell to the ground, but her sister immediately charged at Aemond.

When she got to him, Aemond didn't hesitate and punched Baela in the face.

Alyssa screamed. "Stop it! Stop it, everyone, now!"

"Come at me again and I'll feed you to my dragon!" Aemond roared, stepping over to help Alyssa to her feet.

But the threat escalated the situation. Jace lunged at his uncle, punching him in the face. Luke also attacked Aemond.

Aemond quickly looked at Alyssa, silently telling her not to intervene, he didn't want her to get hurt. He had trained with Ser Criston, she was a girl and knew nothing about fighting.

He kicked Jace in the stomach, he fell to the ground. Luke came to defend his big brother, but Aemond punched him in the face. An ugly crack was heard as Luke's nose broke.

He felt a touch on his arm and braced himself to hit the person, but just in time he recognized Alyssa, who was staring at him with wide eyes and shaking her head violently.

"Stop it," she asked him.

Jace, Baela, and Rhaena then charged at Aemond, shoved, kicked, and punched him. Alyssa kept screaming. Pulling Baela off Aemond, yelled at Jace to stop immediately. She grabbed Rhaena, pulling her away from her best friend as well. Aemond fought with Jace. He got the upper hand. He managed to ward off all attacks. As Luke lunged at him, he grabbed the boy's throat and choked him.

Aemond picked up a stone and held it up.

"Aemond, don't," Alyssa whispered, looking at him in fear. "Do not do that."

He looked at her, but his emotions got the better of him. "You will die screaming in flames just as your father did!" He looked hatefully from Luke to Jace. "Bastards," he spat out.

Alyssa flinched at the word. She had never heard it from Aemond's mouth. That insult always came from Aegon, never from Aemond. She was a bastard herself. Alyssa knew that. And she hated that Aemond used that insult while she was around.

"My father's still alive", Luke contradicted and cried.

"Enough now, Aemond. Put the stone down and stop," Alyssa hissed.

She wanted to go up to Aemond, take him by the hand and drag him away, but was stopped. Jace had grabbed her upper arm and was holding her back.

Aemond looked at Jace. Looked angrily at his hand touching Alyssa. "He doesn't know, does he, Lord Strong?"

Jace take out a knife and Alyssa couldn't breathe. The drawing of the blade, the look at the weapon, brought back memories she hadn't processed yet. She had experienced a trauma only a few days ago. A second would follow tonight.

Alyssa couldn't move, couldn't breathe. As if in a trance, she sank to the ground. Wrapped her arms around her torso and rocked back and forth. She just stared at the knife in Jace's hand. She was unable to do more. She could feel her attacker's breath on her face again, the force he had used to hurt her. She felt the sting of her wounds again, the pain in her palms. As if her hands just started bleeding again.

Jace charged at Aemond, the knife in his hand, they fought, then Aemond managed to shove Jace to the ground.

His gaze found Alyssa. She sat still and motionless on the floor. Anger boiled up in him. She did nothing to help him. Didn't defend him, didn't help him.

Betrayal crossed his features.

"What's wrong with you? You let the four of them attack me?" He couldn't control his anger. Felt betrayed by her. He was threatened with a knife and the girl who had always wanted to stand by his side, who had always defended him, did nothing.

Alyssa could only stare at him silently. Her bottom lip trembled. She wanted to tell him what was going on. What was happening to her, what was going on inside her, but no sound escaped her lips.

A snort escaped Aemond. "You're just as much a bastard as they are," he said angrily. "And just as much a whore as your dead mother. They'll die in flames, but you'll die just like your whore mother. Alone, miserable, in the filthy streets of Fleabottom and no one will care that you're dead."

The anger, the hurt, Alyssa's alleged betrayal had a firm grip on him. So he just repeated Aegon words from earlier.

Alyssa snapped out of her rigid state, only to stare wide-eyed at Aemond. Did he really say that to her? A sob escaped her and tears ran down her face. She felt a pain inside that she had never felt before. As if Aemond had punch her in the Face. Aemond had called her bastard, had called her whore. And he wanted her to die. Her best friend has turned against her.

She looked at him with tears in her eyes and narrowed her eyes. So seh didn‘t see That Aemond open his mouth to apologise. To take back his words. He hadn't wanted to say that. Shouldn't have said it. The pain in Alyssa's eyes wasn't something he wanted. She was his best friend, his words hadn't been true.

But then everything happened too quickly. Aemond was distracted and didn‘t pay attention to his youngest nephew.

Luke grabbed the knife that Jace had dropped and in one quick movement, without anyone being able to stop it, he pulled the blade across Aemond's face.

A scream rang out. Called out the men of the king's guard.

But Alyssa just stared straight ahead. The person she had given her heart to, to whom she had promised to be by his side forever, had broken her. Hurt her in a way that would probably never heal.

It seemed to Alyssa that she could hear her heart breaking.

_________

Tagg-List:

@girl-with-an-orange-cat​ @itsjustmyopinionf1​ @xcharlottemikaelsonx​ @immyowndefender​ @kohsongbird​ @curiouser-an-curiouser​ @stargaryenx  @multiple-fandoms-girl @itsemy01 @crazymusicgirl104 

[apricia]

For ever by your side / Aemond Targaryen x reader // Part I

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Author's Notes:

I never expected such a response and I'm still a bit speechless. I just wanted to write down my thoughts without any expectations. This is my very first fanfic, so don't expect too much. And forgive spelling mistakes, because English is not my first language. I'm not even sure where this story is going, I just know I have to write it. So stay tuned.

** Warning: blood, attempted murder, the word whore (although that's pretty normal in the GoT universe), sooner or later incest

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Chapter 1 - In need of a dragon 

"Do it."

Alyssa stared at the bowl on the table in front of her. A red-brown paste lay in it. She looked at the spoon, back at the paste, and gritted her teeth.

"You first," she demanded of her cousin.

She wasn't stupid. If Aegon wanted her to try this stuff, he had to go first. Alyssa didn't know exactly what the paste was, but she smelled the sweet spice and it smelled pungent. Probably too spicy for her taste.

Aegon shook his head. "Don't you dare, cousin?"

"Says the right one. Who is arguing here? Either we both do it, or we don't do it at all."

She felt Aemond shift restlessly in the chair next to her. Aegon had first tried to get his younger brother into a bet, but Aemond had backed down.

Coward, Aegon had called him. That's when Alyssa stepped in. She hated it when Aegon, Jace or Luke made fun of Aemond. Whenever she found out they said something mean, she made the boys regret their actions with her own hands.

More than ten years have passed since the day Alyssa became a princess and was adopted into the family of King Viserys.

Some things have changed for her, and Alyssa knew some things with absolute certainty.

First, she was a Targaryen. Daughter of Prince Daemon. Although she had never spoken to him, she benefited from his reputation. Many feared the prince, his vengefulness and ferocity, so few dared to disrespect the princess. Even if her father lived far away from her in a different land. With his new family.

Second, she was the daughter of a whore. Though Alyssa wasn't sure what that meant, or who her mother was, she knew the unnamed woman hadn't belonged to a noble house. She was no lady, no woman of honor. She heard the whispers in the palace corridors, the chatter of the servants, even the voices of her own family.

Third, she wasn't a dragon rider. Syrax's first throw had been unsuccessful. The eggs she and her cousin Aemond were given at birth had never hatched. She would never have a dragon, at least not if she didn't claim one that already existed. And Alyssa didn't believe that anymore.

Fourth, she was a green. Even if Alyssa couldn't understand what that meant when she was younger. She wasn't stupid. She saw the behavior of Queen Alicent and Princess Rheanyra. They were on different sides, even if the king didn't want to see it. Alyssa wasn't blind to the arguments, however. Her side was only certain: she belonged to the Greens, because Alicent Hightower had taken her in like a daughter. The Queen didn't get along very well with her own daughter Heleana, because Heleana was mostly in her own world. But Alyssa and Alicent shared a closer bond. So Alyssa's loyalty was unquestionable.

And fifth, her best friend, her companion and possibly the love of her life was Aemond Targaryen. He was only five months younger than Alyssa, but she had given him her heart the moment he was born, or he had stolen it from her. What exactly happened didn't matter. He was her better half. They shared the same interests, reading and studying together, spending almost every free moment together, and sharing the same fate due to their lack of a dragon. Aemond understood Alyssa without having to say anything. Just as she understood him. He was her best friend and nothing would ever change that.

Syt mirre ondoso aōha paktot. For ever by your side, that had been her vow and Alyssa would never forget those words. Carried her in her heart like the greatest treasure in all of Westeros.

Alyssa looked at Aemond, who was staring at her with wide eyes. He seemed nervous, but Aegon looked from her to the strange spice that had just been brought to the palace in the morning. It came from Bravos and no one knew exactly what it was.

"I'm a Targaryen, dear cousin. I fear nothing and I'm no coward, but you seem to be." She pulled the bowl towards her, took the spoon and dipped it in the spice until the spoon was full. She gave Aegon a challenging look, then took it into her mouth.

Her cousin's eyes widened and he jumped out of his chair.

"Alyssa..", Aemond said next to her and looked at her worried.

Alyssa swallowed and grinned triumphantly at Aegon. She felt the flames in her mouth, felt them running down her throat. Her whole mouth burned. Alyssa was sure if she opened her mouth she would spit fire. And probably turn Aegon to ashes with it.

But she wasn't about to admit how hot this stuff really was. She felt the tears in her eyes, but didn't let them roll down her cheeks.

Instead, she bit the inside of her cheek and stood up.

"As you can see, my dear cousin. I am a true dragon, you apparently are not." She grinned at him proudly and then left the room. Footsteps were heard behind her and she knew instantly that it was Aemond following her.

"Alyssa, are you alright?"

She nodded haltingly. "I think my mouth is on fire, I need water."

Aemond looked at her confused, then burst out laughing. "I knew that stuff burned like fire."

"You were smarter than me. But I couldn't watch Aegon win again."

"Anyway, the look on his face was worth it. Come on, we'll get you some milk and bread so you can taste something again sometime."

Alyssa nodded and fanned herself to get the heat off her face. Aemond took her hand and walked her down to the kitchen. While she tried to get the sting out of her mouth with bread and milk, Aemond sat across from her.

"Shall we go to the library together later? New books arrived yesterday, about the history of Aegon the Conqueror." The joy on Aemond's face made Alyssa's heart beat faster and a warmth spread inside her. She loved seeing him so carefree and happy.

Alyssa made a face. "We'll have to put that off until tomorrow. I promised the Queen I'd spend time with Helaena today."

"You're my best friend, not my sister's."

"I'm both, yours and her friend, Aemond. Except that Helaena doesn't have any friends except me."

Aemond scowled at her. "She has her bugs."

"They hardly count as friends, Aemond. Why don't you just come with me?"

He shook his head. Although he loved his sister, and Alyssa was aware of it, he didn't like the crawling insects that Helaena loved so dearly. Alyssa didn't blame him. She often sat in the mud with Helaena and inspected worms, larvae or spiders. Listened to her cousin as she told her all the facts about the little animals. Helaena was... unique, as Alyssa always said. She was no ordinary girl and mostly kept to herself. However, the princess had accepted Alyssa by her side and that had led to Alicent asking Alyssa to spend time with her daughter so that she wouldn't be so lonely. What Alicent didn't know was that Helaena wasn't lonely at all. She was alone but not lonely. But the queen saw no difference.

Alyssa was fine with spending time with Helaena, after all she was like a sister to her. And she had learned that she did care what the princess had to say. At least when it came to scorpions, they were really exciting. However, she could safely do without worms and spiders.

"No thanks," Aemond grumbled. "Feel free to spend time with my sister. I'll accompany Aegon to the dragon pit."

Alyssa put down the milk jug and narrowed her eyes at him. "Why are you doing this to yourself, Aemond?" They shared the same fate. They were both dragonless, but unlike her cousin, Alyssa was not obsessed with the creatures. She didn't try to attend the Dragon Keeper's lessons, join Luke, Jace or Aegon while they trained with their dragons. She went for a walk with Helaena and Dreamfyre from time to time, but nothing more. She read about dragons, but she would not get any closer to the flying creatures.

Aemond avoided her gaze. "I'll have a dragon eventually, Alyssa. And I need to be prepared for that."

She grabbed his hand. "I know that one day you will be a dragon rider, but why are you putting yourself under so much pressure?"

Aemond glared at her, but his anger wasn't directed at her. "I can no longer take the humiliations of Aegon and my nephews. They tease me."

"They wouldn't if you stopped going into the dragon pit." If he would stop giving them the opportunity for their mean jokes. But it fell on deaf ears. Aemond just didn't listen to her.

"Someday they'll regret their jokes. When I have my own dragon. And then I'll take you flying, I promise. Syt mirre ondoso aōha paktot," he said softly and grabbed Alyssa's hand again.

She squeezed and gave him a smile. "Pāsan isse ao," she whispered. She had always believed in him, even when no one else did.

"Dracarys, Varmax," Jace roared and they watched as the dragon set the goat on fire. Aemond watched his nephew with envy and disgust. He didn't understand. How come his egg wasn't hatched but Luke and Jace's were? They weren't true Targaryens. At least if he believed his brother's and mother’s words. They didn't look like they had old Valyrion's blood running in them.

They were unassuming. Brown boring hair and eyes of the same color. They didn't look like him and his siblings, or like Alyssa. Aemond knew tat Alyssa’s Mother wasn't a Targaryen either. Still, his best friend looked like him. Silver-white hair, violet eyes. They both deserved dragons. Jace and Luke didn't.

He hated the fact that his nephews owned dragons, but he didn't.

"Aemond, we have a surprise for you," came his older brother's voice and Aemond turned to Aegon.

"What is it?"

"Something very special." Luke joined them and grinned at Aemond. But there was something sly in his grin. Then he disappeared inside the pit.

"You're the only one of us without a dragon. You and Alyssa. While she doesn't seem to care that she doesn't own one, I know how much you want one, brother."

"Indeed," Aemond said, not knowing what this was all leading to.

"And we felt badly about it," Aegon continued. "Precisely because without a dragon you won't have a chance to marry her."

"What are you talking about?"

"Alyssa, of course," Aegon laughed. "She's a Targaryen, well, halfway. She looks like one, at least, and as a princess, she'll only marry a true dragon rider. You understand that, don't you?"

Aemond narrowed his eyes at his brother, but felt himself tighten. He wasn't a dragon rider, neither was Alyssa. But she was his! They were bound together by an oath. He had never thought that one day Alyssa would get married, but it made sense that she would. But if she had to marry someone, it would be him!  They belonged together. Not that Aemond had already thought of marrying her. It was much more that he always saw Alyssa by his side, no matter how he imagined his life to be. She was always a part of it.

And now he shouldn't be allowed to have her just because he didn't own a dragon? Could the gods really be that cruel to him? First they refused him a dragon and now they want to take Alyssa from him... Aemond wouldn't allow that!

"So we found one for you," his older brother continued. "We wouldn't want you to loose Alyssa, would we, brother?" Aegon put a hand on his back and led him towards the tunnels that led down into the pit. There was a rumble and the earth shook beneath their feet.

"A Dragon? How?"

"The gods provide," was his brother's only explanation.

Out of the tunnel came Luke, a pig at his side. Aemond looked at the animal with hate-filled eyes. Wings were attached to its back and the pig trailed an improvised tail. Aemond clenched his fists.

"Behold - the pink dread!" said his brother and nephews in unison and then burst out laughing. Each laugh pierced Aemond's heart like a knife.

"Be sure to mount her carfully. First flight's always rough," laughed his brother. "Perhaps with her help you will be able to make Alyssa yours."

Aegon grunted in Aemond's ear and his nephews did the same before leaving Aemond alone. Humiliated and angry.

His father wouldn't let Alyssa marry anyone else, would he? His mother knew how important Alyssa was to him and she herself had taken the princess to her heart. They wouldn't let Alyssa be taken from you, would they?

But if only a dragon rider was allowed to marry Alyssa, then Aemond would become a dragon rider. He stared into the darkness of the tunnel and clenched his jaws. He would have a dragon! For Alyssa!

Meanwhile, Alyssa sat alone with her cousin in their chambers. Also coming by ship from Bravos were two scorpions, which Helaena proudly presented to Alyssa.

"Like spiders, scorpions also have eight legs. They also have two tentacles with claws, like a crab," Helaena said, holding the little creature in front of Alyssa's nose.

"With the claws and the poisonous sting, the animals defend themselves in case of danger or kill their prey."

Alyssa looked from the scorpions to her cousin. "How can you be sure that he won't stab you with it and you die? I imagine death by poisoning to be extremely painful." She had respect for the little creature and avoided getting too close to the stinger, let alone picking up the scorpion like Helaena did.

However, Helaena looked at him with a tenderness on her face that Alyssa found incomprehensible. She looked at Aemond like that, maybe sometimes at Alicent, but not an animal that could kill her in seconds.

"He won't harm me."

"If you say that."

Alyssa was about to ask a question when the door opened without knocking. Into the room came a man in a black robe that Alyssa didn't recognize. He didn't look like the king's guard who had been at the door when they'd arrived.

"Who are you?" Alyssa wanted to know and looked at the man curiously.

The man approached her and pulled a knife from his belt. Alyssa's eyes widened in horror and next to her, Helaena, who seemed to be in her right mind, began to scream.

"Death to the Targaryens," the man hissed, lunging at the girls. Alyssa pushed Helaena aside and started calling for help as well. Someone had to hear her and come and rescue them both.

She was just a girl, just eleven years old. What could she do against a grown man who was armed? Nothing at all. But Alyssa refused to die today. She wouldn't let this man hurt Helaena.

She heard shouts and hasty footsteps, and Alyssa knew they wouldn't have to last long before help would arrive. So she fought. She snatched the scorpion from Helaena's hand and threw it at her attacker. He screamed, but threw the venomous beast away before the deadly sting could hit him.

Then the blade came into Alyssa's field of vision. She didn't think about it any further, but threw up her arms.

Her hands gripped the weapon and she felt the pain a split second later as the blade dug into her flesh. She gripped the knife with both hands and pushed the man away as best she could.

"Princesses," came the familiar voice of Ser Harrold Westerling.

Alyssa screamed as the man was pulled away from her and the knife fell to the ground. Her knees buckled under her and she sank onto the cool marble floor beneath her. She was shaking, trembling all over and barely aware of what was happening around her. She heard Helaena screaming and crying through a veil. She heard more guards storm the room, someone calling for the king and queen. And then she saw two pairs of boots come into view.

Ser Harrold knelt beside her. "Let me see, Princess."

Alyssa stared at him through a veil of tears. It hurt, it really hurt. Her palms were soaked in blood. Two deep cuts adorned her skin and the blood continued to flow incessantly. She whimpered as the commander pulled her into his arms. "You were very brave, princess, like a true Targaryen. A maester will look into this, but I'm sure it's only a flesh wound."

Alyssa nodded haltingly. The adrenaline had left her body, she felt the exhaustion, felt the fear and began to sob.

"Everything will be fine, Princess, I promise you."

Some time later, Alyssa was sitting in the Queen's chamber with Helaena. Alicent was beside them with anger. The man who attacked the girls was in the dungeon and was being questioned. The queen had calmed her daughter while Maester Orwyle examined Alyssa's wounds and sewed them up. Alyssa hated every second of it. She watched as the thread and needle pushed through her skin, over and over again. At first she had flinched at every bite, but now she sat motionless.

"It'll heal, won't it?" Alicent asked while rubbing Helaena's back soothingly.

"It will. The scars will remain, but will fade over time. However, the princess will not be able to use her hands for the next few days. She will need help."

"Thank you Maester."

Alyssa hated being dependent on help from others. But she watched silently as the maester bound her hands so that she could not even move her fingers. As if instead of two hands she only had two lumps, as if she were a cripple.

Alicent knelt in front of Alyssa and smiled at her. "Thank you, Alyssa. You protected Helaena and made your family proud. I am so glad und thankful that you are alright."

Alyssa nodded. She would always protect her family, no matter the cost.

A knock sounded and a guard entered the room.

"Your Grace," the guard said, dragging Aemond with him.

Alicent, Alyssa and Helaena whirled on the two at the same time.

"Aemond," said the Queen, leaving Alyssa's side. She herself looked at her friend with wide eyes and wanted to get up from the chair she was sitting on, but the maester prevented her.

"What have you done?" the queen wanted to know angrily. The princesses had been attacked and now she had to take care of the prince, who broke the rules again.

"He did it again," Helaena murmured and looked at her brother blankly.

"After how many times you've been warned, must I have you confined to your chambers? After everything that happened today, I don't want to have to deal with such nonsense anymore!" The anger was clearly audible in the queen's voice.

Aemond wasn't looking at his mother, his eyes were fixed on the floor. However, Alyssa knew him too well. He had been humiliated and he was ashamed. What had Aegon, Luke and Jace done this time? Alyssa wanted to clench her fists, but couldn't. Her hands were so bandaged that she could barely use them.

"They made me do it," Aemond yelled, jerking his head up.

"As if you needed encouragement. Your obsession with those beasts goes beyond understanding."

Alyssa narrowed her eyes. She didn't know how many more times Alicent wanted to have this discussion with Aemond. Her son wouldn't listen to her. If he didn't listen to Alyssa, he didn't listen to anyone.

"They gave me a pig," Aemond then roared, and a hiss escaped Alyssa.

It was only then that he noticed that she was there too. He looked at her, blush gracing his cheeks, his eyes full of tears, tears of anger. Aemond looked away from Alyssa. He didn't know why she was in his mother's chambers, but his own feelings controlled him so that he couldn't think about it.

"A what?" Alicent asked blankly.

"They say they found a dragon for me. So I can claim.." Aemond fell silent, but his gaze slid to Alyssa, who looked at him in horror.

What had he wanted to claim? The dragon? His rightful place in this family? She didn't know what he was talking about, but she understand his anger.

Alicent also followed her son's gaze, but she knew immediately what Aemond was getting at and what it all had to do with Alyssa. She knew her youngest son's feelings for his cousin. She even supported them.

Ignoring the Maester's protesting words, Alyssa got up and started to leave the room.

"Princess", the maester called afterwards. "Where do you want to go? Your hands.."

"I'll find Aegon, Luke and Jace and give them the treatment they deserve." She was filled with anger. She hated it when someone treated Aemond badly. No one was allowed to treat him like that, not even his brother or nephews.

Alicent stopped Alyssa and pulled her back. "You will do no such thing. You must rest, Alyssa. You and your hands need rest."

Alyssa just snorted and tucked her bandaged hands behind her back when she felt the blank look from Aemond on her, who didn't seem to know what had happened in the princess' chambers a few moments ago. Alyssa didn't want to show him her injuries, didn't want him to worry about her. As she worried about him.

When the queen was satisfied that Alyssa would not leave the room, she turned back to her son and placed both hands on his shoulders.

"You will have a dragon one day," she tried to encourage Aemond and calm him down.

"He'll have to close an eye," Helaena said quietly and Alyssa frowned at her cousins words. Sometimes Helaena said strange things. And sometimes these strange things came true.

"I know it," the Queen continued.

"They all laughed," Aemond said quietly, staring at the floor.

Alyssa would love to run to him and hug him, but she knew he didn't want that at the moment. He didn't want her pity. He didn't want to show weakness in front of her, so she stayed where she was. But her anger towards Aegon, Luke and Jace only increased. If she could use her hands, she would beat up the three boys herself.

Alicent pulled Aemond into her arms and held him tight. Over the queen's shoulder, Alyssa and Aemond exchanged a look. She gave him a hesitant smile and nodded, as if she too was sure that one day he would have a dragon. Aemond tried to return the smile, but his eyes drifted to her hands and he frowned in confusion. He looked questioningly at Alyssa.

She just shook her head and hid her hands behind her back. Everything was fine, she was fine. Heleana was fine. And the man who did this to her was already behind bars.

Alyssa was safe. Although she could still see and feel the man and his blade as soon as she closed her eyes. 

_________

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[apricia]

For ever by your side/ Aemond Targaryen x reader

Prolog: Alyssa Targaryen - Second of her name

King's Landing was in a celebratory mood. People celebrated Princess Helaena Targaryen's first name day. The little princess was barely aware of the celebrations held in her honor. Slept peacefully in the care of her governess. A big tournament drew all the lords, ladies and knights to the capital. While King Viserys, his Lord Hand, and the small council enjoyed the brutal games, Queen Alicent rubbed her plump belly. Her daughter's first birthday was just celebrated and she was already carrying her third child under her heart. She knew it would be a boy. Felt it in her heart. Another son for the king. Another descendant of Valyria. Silver hair, purple eyes. Alicent had wished that at least one child would not have these traits, but she knew that Valyrian blood was strong and at least her loyalty to the king would never be questioned. She was a loyal wife, a good queen. Just like her father asked of her. And so she once again carried a child of the king. It would only be a few months, if even weeks, until the birth. Not an event she was looking forward to. She remembered too much the pain of her last delivery. Squeezing Helaena out of her body had been excruciating, not nearly as easy as Aegon's, if childbirth could even be called easy. Alicent flinched when she was kicked in the ribs just as one of the opponents was knocked off his horse. A little fighter was growing inside her, she was sure of that. "Your Grace, I hate to interrupt the celebrations in honor of the Princess, but there is one matter that you must attend to. It cannot be postponed." Ser Harrold Westerling appeared next to the royal couple and although his voice was low, Alicent understood every word. What troubled her was the deep furrows on the Lord Commander's forehead. "What's so important, Ser Harrold, that it can't wait until after the tournament?" Viserys asked, frowning at his follower. "A woman has appeared in the keep, demanding an talk with you, Your Majesty." Alicent pricked up her ears at the word woman. She gritted her teeth and looked at her husband. Viserys was loyal to her, she knew that. Although he wasn't the husband she would have chosen for herself, she couldn't deny that he was good to her. Loving, decent and kind. He took no other women into his bed. No, he wasn't in the least like his brother Daemon, who hated his own wife and shared a bed with every whore in Fleabottom. A tight smile appeared on her face. No, thank the gods the king wasn't like that. "What woman?" Viserys demanded, and Alicent found him glancing sideways at her. Ser Harrold cleared his throat and his cheeks suddenly blushed with embarrassment. "She is a whore, Your Majesty, but she says the matters she has to discuss with you are important." Alicent struggled to her feet and rubbed her stomach. The little warrior in her had stopped kicking, as if he, too, would hold his breath and want to know what important matter it was that demanded the king's attention on his daughter's nameday. "Husband, it seems to me that the matter is urgent, we should deal with it immediately," Alicent smiled at Viserys. She knew perfectly well that Ser Harrold had only wanted to speak to the king, but something told Alicent that she needed to meet this woman. This whore who considered herself important enough to demand an audience with the king and whom the guards let into the keep instead of publicly flogging her and sending her back to the whore house she came from. "My dear, you don't have to come. Enjoy the tournament, I can take care of it myself." "No, a little walk is good for me. Your son is very active today." To emphasize her words, she rubbed her bulging stomach with a smile. Not long now and she would be holding her third child in her arms. Viserys nodded and offered her his arm. The carriage ride into the keep didn't take long, but Alicent certainly hadn't been prepared for what awaited she there. In the great hall stood a woman, beautiful, dark hair, dark eyes, and her skin was sunkissed. She looked too elegant for an ordinary whore, was dressed too finely and her posture too self-confident.

"What's the meaning of this?" Viserys demanded, helping Alicent down the few steps in the throneroom. "Your Majesties," the woman said in a musical voice that made Alicent squint. The woman held a basket in her hands and from a distance the young queen saw that something was moving in it. "My name is Mysaria, Your Grace. I -" "You are friend of my brother's, I remember you." Viserys eyed the woman, then looked skeptically at the basket in her hands. "Still, I don't understand what you want here. For your last interactions with my brother, I could have had you killed." He looked at the Kingsguard and grimaced as if he wanted to lynch them for taking him away from the tournament for a whore who was consorting with his brother. "I know that and I am very grateful to you for showing mercy to me, my king. But the affairs with Prince Daemon at that time do not bring me here today. At least not entirely." "Then what brings you into the red keep?" Alicent now demanded to know. Her hand rested on the bulge of her stomach. She was glad to have left the children with their wet nurse. Aegon was three years old and far too wild to endure his curiosity and energy for any length of time. "I'm coming at the behest of a friend." The way she used the word friend let everyone in the room know that said friend was also in the industry as Mysaria. The woman put down the basket and took out the bundle inside. There was a scream and Alicent flinched. A child's cry echoed through the room and Alicent narrowed his eyes in confusion. "Whose child is this?" demanded Viserys, who seemed to be losing patience. "Your brother's." Alicent's eyes widened and she stared at the crying baby in the whore's arms. One look was enough to know that this child was of House Targaryen. Silvery white hair, purple eyes. Alicent let out a snort. They were brought here because Daemon got a whore pregnant? Was she serious? Alicent understood an important matter differently. But Viserys stepped forward and stopped just inches from Mysaria. His eyes on the child. "She is beautiful," said the king in awe. "She is, Your Majesty. But sadly motherless now. Which is why I'm here." Visery's eyes darted from the whore to the child in her arms and to Alicent, who was watching the situation suspiciously. "Motherless? What happened?" "Her mother died in childbirth last week, Your Grace. It's common for women like us to stick together and raise children that result from relationships with our clients, but this is different. She is different” said Mysaria, smiling down at the child as she said her last words. "What do you expect from the king?" Alicent asked unabashedly and stepped closer to the whore and her husband. "That he tracks down Daemon so he can take care of his bastard himself?" Mysaria shook her head. "Your brother is in town, I've already spoken to him. He doesn't want anything to do with the child - his only child, mind I say." Alicent nodded. She didn't think much of Daemon, never did. He was wild, moody and selfish. Didn't understand honor, duty and loyalty. "Daemon is here?" Viserys asked. Sorrow in his voice. "He was." Alicent said nothing about the fact that her brother-in-law had not even had the decency to appear before the king or at his niece's second nameday celebrations. Gods, how she despised this man. "And he rejected this enchanting being?" Viserys asked further. A smile appeared on the king's face and only then did Alicent realize that the child had stopped crying. Instead, it looked at Viserys. Alicent guessed the child would be a few months old, maybe three or four. Her husband grabbed the little creature and stroked his cheek. A chuckle was heard. "What do you intend to do, husband?" Alicent asked, putting a hand on Viserys' shoulder. She prayed that the king would force his brother to take the child. It would be a fair punishment for this lecher. Alicent would only be sorry for the child. Having Daemon Targaryen as a father was a shame. This man was a disgrace. He had already rejected his child without even meeting it. Viserys looked at Alicent, back at the baby. "Does she have a name?" he asked Mysaria. "Not yet, her mother hadn't given her one, she fell ill with a fever right after the birth and wasn't able to take care of the little one." Viserys nodded his understanding and then stretched out his arms. "May I?"

Without hesitation, she placed the child in the king's outstretched arms, who held it tightly to his chest. Alicent saw the smile on her husband's face. He was always in a good mood when it came to children, although Alicent wished he would bring that cheerfulness and warmth to her own children more often. The only person who she ever sah Viserys to bring such an loving expression was Rheanyra. As if she was his only child and Alicents children with him were worth nothing.  "Alyssa," came the king's voice. "Her name should be Alyssa and she should live here in the keep with us." His words were full of warmth, but at the same time there was a determination that made Alicent swallow. Alyssa had been his mother's name. A woman the king always spoke good things about. Of her beauty, her kindness and her strength. "You want to take the child in?" she asked her husband. He nodded. Alicent was expecting her third child, but she had no intention of raising another - a stranger, mind you. Especially not when it was the offspring of Daemon, who fathered it with a common whore. "Alicent, you may not understand, but it has always been my wish that my children and my brother's grow up together. As cousins, maybe more as siblings. I wanted our children to be close." Alicent understood her husband's wishes only too well. He always wished to be closer to his brother. To have a good relationship with him. But unfortunately that was not the case. Therefore, she could understand the wish that at least their children understood each other. Still, it wasn't what she wanted. "Unfortunately, by the late Lady Rhea, my brother had no children and I do not care who the mother of this little creature is. She is my niece and is now under my protection. I want her to stay here and grow up alongside my children. She will be an excellent playmate for Princess Helaena, don’t you think, my dear? Perhaps for our next child as well." Alicent put a hand on her stomach and felt another kick. As if the unborn in her agreed with his father's words, as if he wanted to keep Daemon's daughter as a comrade. Alicent nodded, knowing she couldn't change Viserys' mind. "Then let her stay." She stepped closer to her husband and looked at the little girl who was still smiling at her uncle. "Alyssa Waters," Alicent said, smiling. "No, my dear," contradicted the king. "Alyssa Targaryen, second of her name." Alicent's eyes widened. "Targaryen?" she asked, stunned. This kid was a bastard. She was the daughter of Daemon Targaryen and an unnamed whore! "Yes, Alyssa Targaryen," Viserys repeated his niece's name. "As king of the realm, I legitimize her. She's my brother's only child and I don't care about her origins. If she grows up here in the keep, alongside my children, then she'll be what she is: a Targaryen. And she's meant to be treated such are. From today, in her cradle, there will be a dragon egg by her side. Syrax laid two eggs. Our child will have one, and she shall have the other." And with that, the fate of this child changed from one second to the next. The daughter of a whore, insignificant and destitute, had become a princess, entitled to her father's inheritance, and future dragon rider in the blink of an eye. Alicent just looked at her husband without a word and shook her head almost imperceptibly. What was it about this baby that made her legitimate? Gave her a dragon egg? Was she that engaging? So special? Alicent strongly dared to doubt. But she would discover in time that Viserys wasn't the only Targaryen men who was immediately charmed by the child. Her unborn child, her second son, would follow his father's example.

[apricia]

Luchia rannte. Sie rannte so schnell ihre Beine konnten, doch sie wusste, dass sie zu spät kommen würde. Als sie die Türen zur Kirche aufstieß traf sie die Erkenntnis wie eine Faust in den Magen. Auf wackligen Beinen ging sie auf den Altar zu. Aus ihrem Hals traten die ersten Schluchzer, Auf dem Altar lag eine Frau, ein Schwert ragte aus ihrer Brust und ihre gesamten Kleider waren blutverschmiert. Als Luchia näher trat und das Mädchen erkannte, stieß sie einen markerschütternden Schrei aus. Sie rannte auf den Altar zu, fasste nach der Hand des Mädchens und fühlte nach ihrem Puls. Nichts. Luchia konnte keinen Puls finden. Als sie das Mädchen genauer ansah, blickte sie in kalte blaue Augen. Blaue Augen, die sonst vor Leben und Energie strahlten waren nur leer und ausdruckslos. Sie war tot. Apricia war tot. Bei diesem Gedanken fing Luchia an zu schreien, Tränen liefen ihr über die Wange und sie beugte sich über den Altar um den leblosen Körper in die Arme zu nehmen. Sie klammerte sich an den Körper, als hinge ihr eigenes Leben davon ab. Ihre Tränen und Schreie wollten kein Ende finden. Luchias Brust zog sich vor Schmerzen zusammen und ihr Herz verkrampfte sich. Ihre beste Freundin war tot, ermordet worden, und es war allein ihre Schuld. Sie hatte eine Entscheidung getroffen, die ihrer Freundin und Prinzessin das Leben gekostet hatte. 

[apricia]

“Du willst mit ihr zusammen sein? Dann hör auf hier rum zu heulen und hol sie dir.”