Often we are unaware of the struggles others encounter on their Christian journey, the daily battle, and the uphill climb - the spiraling roads, the crossroads, the blind corners that bring failure and discomfort.
I had the privilege of speaking with a long time friend today, who has been struggling with this uphill climb. I was unaware of the inner turmoil, trials, and temptation they faced.Â
Undoubtedly, this pandemic generated an onset of bondage to things of this world for them - and they were ready to surrender to God everything.
They asked to share their testimony but was wary that I would judge them, their lifestyle, their mistakes, and mess up.
I sympathized with them, the internal struggle, the journey that often seems long and challenging, the expectations. Still, God's grace is sufficient to cover our failures. He gives us the strength to overcome sin and to denounce the things of this world.Â
Ironically, we were both struggling with not wanting to be judged in some way. For them, failing as a Christian should not be one to be witnessed - mess-ups are messy and, no one seeks joy in sharing that type of life. Instead, it is far more rewarding for others to observe our success; this is what our flesh wants us to believe. So, how do we encourage the Christian hope and draw others closer to God if we are not transparent with who we are?
Within the confined spaces of difficult confessions, my friend implored me to pray and asked if I needed prayers. The pride in me sought to say, "No, everything is good" but the Holy Spirit spoke to my heart. Â
 My heart - kindled by His voice as I became more self-aware of the things that were obstructing my growth. The feelings of inadequacy and the fear of being judged, criticized. Unfortunately, this kept me from fully engaging myself in God's work.
I went from being actively involved in church to retreating to where it seemed safe or comfortable. I became so afraid of crowds, criticism -my thoughts impaired me from being my best. "What if I'm not good enough?" "What if they don't like what I have to say?" "What will they think of me?". These thoughts rendered me helpless. Yet, while the man looks at the outward appearance, God looks at the heart. (1 Samuel 16:7)Â
Our Father in Heaven desires us to hear instead, "I love you", "You are more than enough, do you know, you were bought at a price?" "Honor me. Fix your eyes on me, not on this world", "I think the world of you".Â
My Spirit felt a great sense of calm as God was revealing something to me - how long my mind has been holding me captive, binding me to the feelings of inadequacy. The memory of a quote burned in my mind - if only we can fix our thoughts on God, we would not be so self-absorbed. How compelling a statement!
 Although we would fail, fall, face trials, temptations, and persecution in this life, God's grace is sufficient. Moreover, Christ's sacrifice assures us that we are more than enough. While there are moments that render us weak, God's never-ending love and boundless mercies overflow from Heaven, refreshing us and fortifying our Spirit.
2 Corinthians 12:9-10 reminds us, "But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."
In the conclusion of my conversation with my friend, we realized what importance lies in eternal matters, bearing a heart that seeks to please God. While they surrendered the pride of life, I also renounced my fears and feelings of inadequacy to God.Â
 Despite the unpleasant nature of growth, I challenge you, as I have also challenged myself - to pray without ceasing and surrender to God daily. Seek a loving relationship with your Savior. He will release you from the oppression of the mind and the vanities of this world.Â