Systems Engineer :: Aria Parish

Secrets don't guard themselves.

[girlwhoisgoingtobeokay]

I HAVE TO DO THE WORK SO THAT MY LIFE CAN BE DIFFERENT AND I CAN REAP THE BENEFITS

[lavernecoxs]

[aria-parish]

<Nicholas Alan Cope (via tyriell)

[que-voyahacer]

[aria-parish]

Astronomic Picture Atlas

[samsaranmusing-deactivated20140]

[lifeinpoetry]

We were born in a poor time never touching each other’s hunger never sharing our crusts in fear the bread became enemy. Now we raise our children to respect themselves as well as each other. Now you have made loneliness holy and useful and no longer needed now your light shines very brightly but I want you to know your darkness also rich and beyond fear.

Audre Lorde, “Sister Outsider.” The Black Unicorn: Poems 

[hunter]

[lovelyandbrown]

i was alone before i was with you. even when i was with other men, i was still alone. now, i have you. and i’m finally not alone. i’m complete. full. whole. and that is terrifying. - it shouldn’t be legal for you to look at me the way you do. you make me feel like i’m 12 years old again, holding your hand in a crowded middle school hallway. and like a 26 year old woman, laid up under you at a speakeasy. and a 40 year old woman, watching old cartoons in bed after the kids are asleep. you make me feel the span of a lifetime in one blink of your almond eyes. i don’t know how you do it. - now that i’m not alone, i’m terrified. i see my life with you flashing before my very eyes and part of me wants to just run away. loving you is the scariest thing i have ever done. i’ve spent my life looking for the love i deserved and here you are and part of me is panicking. i have been unpacking myself and criticizing myself, praying that i’ll be good enough for you. if i’m worth the mileage and the effort. the abstinence and the late night skype calls. if i’m really the love of your life or if you’re just confused. - i love you, and i trust you. i just don’t trust love. yet. - i know there are no guarantees in life. there’s no way of assuring that we’ll be together forever, that we’ll be happy together, that you’ll love me forever. your love for me is so deep its like the pacific ocean in high tide and you’re telling me to just dive in but i am scared i’m going to drown in it. that there’s so much of you encompassing me that it’ll seep into every orifice and there won’t be any room for me. because what if i wash up on shore, filled with all of you and nothing left of me, after your ocean spits me out?  - what if my love can’t sustain you? what if i can’t be the woman, wife, mother of your children that you need? what if you just get…tired of me? like everyone else before you? what if love isn’t enough and you let me go? - i thought i could live without you. i’d rather die young. - what if i actually just shut the fuck up and stopped the sleepless nights with tears streaming down my face? what if i just accepted the fact that you and i are something divinely orchestrated and i’ll never have the answers to something that God orchestrated? what if i sat back, let all of your love wash over me and submerge me, having me sputtering up happiness, joy, and warmth? what if i let you look me in the eyes and feel that this puzzle is finally complete? what if i stop pretending that i’m okay with loneliness? what if, horror of horrors, all of this worrying is for nothing and it will work out seamlessly? - i was alone, and i was content with my silence, but you. you are the only exception. the cacophony of laughter and love is sweeter than my solitude.

the only exception.

[sylarclaus-blog]

[ariaparish]

LDR Life Hack --

[aria-parish]

Aria to Daniel; [x]

Open now.

No matter when “now” is, and how often, no matter how many times you have to come back to this: you’re my best thing. Out of everything. And I love you so much. Maybe I don’t say it enough. But I do. And you are. You really are. You and me are together until the end.

Open when… we didn’t get to see each other this weekend.

Dibs on a Monday date night, then, alright? No negotiations. If I don’t get to say it: I love you, and goodnight, and sweet dreams, and I love you again, and good morning, and I love you over breakfast. I just owe you a lot of “I love yous” next time. I miss you. Come home safe. And come home soon.

Open when… you’re losing hope.

We are safe. You are safe and I am safe and we are both alive and it’s going to stay that way for a long time. We made it. We didn’t die. Breathe. You have a place here. And you have me. It’s not much, but it’s all I’ve got, and it’s yours, too. And we’ve both had less. I’m not letting you go-- we made it this far. We can make it farther. And if we can’t, I’m still here with you, and if we go down, we go down swinging, and never without a fight, no matter the odds. You don’t even have to ask.

Open when… you need a reminder of how much I love you!

I’d do it all over again. All of it. Even the bad stuff. Even the not-knowing. I’m not brave. I'm not a brave person. But I would face down everything and everyone that nearly killed us a hundred times over to make sure we still get here, and you’re still saved. And you and this and what we have is absolutely worth it. Never doubt that.

Open when… you need a smile. :)

[ Inside the card, nothing is written; there’s only a flattened-out cootie catcher made of receipt papers to while away the long train ride out of Weyland quarantine, years ago, and a single Jenga brick. ]

Open when… you can’t sleep.

Wake me up. Meet me in the treehouse. We’ll set up the telescope. Imagine the banyan trees’ bark under the ladder and blanket forts all around. Imagine home.

Open when… you’re feeling lonely.

I don’t want you to feel like you’re alone. Ever. Pick a song, pick a constellation, pick a word that will be ours, and know that I’m always here to hold your hand and pipe in with my half of the puzzle. If you’re on Earth, look up; if you’re out there, look down. If I can’t understand… I’ll try.

Open when… I’m mad at you…

Genius Squad’s forever. So you aren’t getting out of this that easily. You’re stuck with me like this until I either crack like a walnut and tell you what’s going on, or until I undo whatever it is you did, which was probably trying to keep me out of trouble. Just let me get in trouble next time!! Then you wouldn’t get into these messes, Dr. H. (I accept coffee and pizza as peace offerings.)

Open when… you’re mad at me. :(

I probably did something really fuckin’ stupid that involved a fire or an explosion or something. And I’m probably really sorry about that. I will repair any damages if I am uninjured. If I’m injured: DO NOT THREATEN THE MEDICAL STAFF AGAIN. THEY DON’T LIKE THAT. If things get bad again-- like when we were on tour-- tell me. Please tell me. I can handle mad. We both know I can. But I get too into my own head and I trust you to snap me out of it if I stop talking or try and disappear again.

Open when… some boy tries hitting on me.

I want you to picture Savage’s selfies with Ursa in that sarong I sent him, with the bandoliers and the storm rifle and the under-eye grease paint and split knuckles and everything. And Toadies’s godawful billboards. The ones with two Toadies instead of Fish. They’re like hilarious, terrible, murderous, cock-blocking guardian angel train wrecks. Even if you had even a fraction of a margin of a percent to worry about anything like other men’s interest-- which you don’t, because I want you and I love you and I’m with you because I choose you-- understand that the only room I have for “other men” in my life is about 85% mercenaries giving me grey hair.

Open when… you want to know all you’ve done for me.

I like myself when I’m with you. And I feel like I can just… be. It’s easy. And it’s good. I never had that before. You gave me a home. I just provided the house.

Open when… you’re thinking about the future.

We both know how short life can be, and how uncertain.

But I’m not scared of tomorrows anymore. And I know who I want to build them with.

DALARI123 / DOCTORDANIELHARGRAVE

[pi-on-a-skateboard]

Visit Original Link

[aria-parish]

Rihanna x Coldplay - We Found Stars (Mashup A Capella Arrangement) pi-on-a-skateboard (2015)

[aria-parish]

Cobrowsing; Truth or Dare || Aria & Daniel

[doctordanielhargrave-blog]

Daniel sighed, and put his socked feet on Aria’s thigh as he leaned against the wall, which was itchy and generally not a good place to be putting one’s head. He made a weak pantomime of using the force to get the camera. He attempted to squint ferociously while pouting, which he could tell was a wholly unsuccessful endeavor.

“‘M not a baby, you’re a baby.” But he could feel himself starting to smile, he could feel it, so bit his entire lip, sinking further towards the floor. If he smiled it would mean that Aria would win. But he held out his hand for the camera, his shoulder pressed awkwardly between the loveseat and the wall. It was either that or raspberry noises, and he hadn’t sunk that low. Yet.

Damn it. He was smiling.

[aria-parish]

Aria raised an eyebrow, though in all likelihood Daniel couldn't see it. He was trying to appear stoic and withdrawn, hanging onto the stern tone he'd taken when Aria's photo requests got more excessive, but that didn't combine well with slowly sliding into a completely prone position on the floor, half-pouting, half-grinning. He really thinks he's the scarier one, too. "C'mere, goose."

She reached over and laced her fingers with his, yanking Daniel closer to slump over on top of her instead of further away. He collided with her shoulder, but before Daniel could groan in exaggerated protest, Aria leaned down to plant a kiss on his forehead. She smiled, still wearing his glasses tipped up to rest on top of her head, and hovered so their faces remained only a few inches apart.

"...Better?" The camera was within arm's reach, but Aria didn't go to grab for it and pass it over. "I pick truth, by the way. You won't get revenge that quickly."

[aria-parish]

Cobrowsing; Truth or Dare || Aria & Daniel

"...All right. That's impromptu photoshoot check and check. You can stop whining now, you big baby."

Aria grinned at Daniel (though it was more like a smirk, really) as she set the small camera to retract back into her phone and reached up to place it on the coffee table; they'd managed to end up sitting slumped on the floor, backs against the bottom of the small loveseat they'd managed to wrangle into the small space rather than seated on it. She'd already cracked a joke about it feeling awfully familiar, but since Aria'd been the one to convince Daniel to pose for pictures out here anyway, and it wasn't like there was enough room for them both to fit anywhere else in the treehouse, it had been about as lighthearted as sarcasm could get.

"My turn now, right?"

[aria-parish]

"No idea what you're talking about, Daniel. Have you tried looking the last place you put them? ...Heh. Now stop fidgeting. I'm still having fun. You can have the camera and your glasses back when it's your turn."

[aria-parish]

TXT: Turn around.

[self-seeking]

Wake me up at 3am just to tell me that I’m not close enough. Wake me again at 7am because we need to get ready for the day. Once more at 7:15 because we both know I don’t do mornings. Tell me about the dream you had last night while we have toast and orange juice. I’m tired as hell but I hear and feel every single word that you say. Ask me how I slept because you feel like you’ve been talking for too long. My answer is always the same when you ask, sleeping next to you is heavenly. Apologize for waking me up at 3 while I assure you that it’s okay and that I’m so glad that you did, then rally in your stubborn persistence the notion that it was out of line. Start explaining how wrong it was. You won’t get very far into your rant because I need to kiss you. Not only to stop you from being ridiculous but because I love you so much more than I can express with words. So please, wake me up at 3am so I can pull you closer and kiss you softly. “I love you endlessly” will be my sleepy response each time; as those four words are the only ones that can even come close to explaining my feelings for you.

I love you a lot. (via sarahiscray)

[aria-parish]

Astronaut Homecoming [x]

[thebees-kneez]