“ um, that’s not my name actually. ”
“ there’s toilet paper attatched to your shoe.. ”
“ you know, you’re dragging toilet paper with you, right? ”
“ there’s toilet paper hanging from your back. ”
“ could you pull your pants up? your crack is showing. ”
“ i can see your nipples through your shirt. ”
“ you know the bathroom door is wide open, right? ”
“ there’s a nude photo of you all over the internet right now. ”
“ did you mean to send me this nude photo of you? ”
“ yeah, i accidentally sent you a nude, could you just delete it. ”
“ i think you meant to text someone else your nudes, yeah? ”
“ um, is this text message really meant for me? ”
“ oh shit! i’m sorry, my bad, i didn’t think anyone was in here. ”
“ your back side is hanging out from your hospital gown. ”
“ wow, that is literally the smallest dick i’ve ever seen. ”
“ is your vagina always this loose? it just keeps falling out. ”
“ are you okay? you ran into that door pretty hard. ”
“ uh, yeah, i think your skirt is caught in the car door. ”
“ is there a reason your standing in the street bare naked? ”
“ hey, could you pull the bathroom door shut? ”
“ hey! if anyone can hear me, i could really use some toilet paper! ”
“ jesus, put a shirt on! ”
“ you smell like shit, have you showered lately? ”
“ your breath is on foul, seriously, do you own a toothbrush? ”
“ oh, my god! wow, okay, yeah. uhm, ever heard of knocking? ”
“ yeah, i’m trying to use the rest room here, could you leave? ”
“ are you jacking off in the stall next to me? ”
“ wow, could you not peek at me from the other stall?! thank you. ”
“ did i leave my keys at your house? oh nevermind, they’re in my hand. ”
“ hey, just calling to see if you’ve seen my phone anywhere? ”
“ have you seen my phone anywhere? oh wait, it’s in my hand. ”
“ oh, dear! are you alright? you hit the ground pretty hard. ”
“ what’s that stain on the back of your pants? ”
“ oh my god, did you really just fart? ”
“ i think your bleeding through, hunny. ”
“ there’s blood on the back of your shorts by the way. ”
“ your shit is stained yellow, under the arms, maybe you want to change. ”
turnnoffyourmind
stormborns
gummygunk
izzy806
kaledo-art
tangentwithtanner
andulkaphoto
theartofmadeline
jbbartram-illu
