And I want to play hide-and-seek, give you my clothes and tell you I like your shoes, sit on the steps while you take a bath, massage your neck and kiss your feet, hold your hand and go for a meal, not mind when you eat my food and meet you at Rudy’s.
Talk about the day and type up your letters, carry your boxes and laugh at your paranoia, give you tapes you don’t listen to, watch great films and watch terrible films, complain about the radio.
Then take pictures of you when you’re sleeping, get up to fetch you coffee. Drink coffee at midnight and have you steal my cigarettes, never be able to find a match and tell you about the tv programme I saw the night before.
Take you to the eye hospital and not laugh at your jokes, want you in the morning but let you sleep for a while, kiss your back and stroke your skin.
Tell you how much I love your hair, your eyes, your lips, your neck, your arse, your smile.
Sit on the steps smoking till you come home and worry when you’re late. Be amazed when you’re early and give you sunflowers, go to your party and dance till I’m black.
Be sorry when I’m wrong and happy when you forgive me. Look at your photos and wish I’d known you forever.
Hear your voice in my ear and feel your skin on my skin. Hug you when you’re anxious, hold you when you hurt.
Want you when I smell you, offend you when I touch you.
Whimper when I’m next to you and whimper when I’m not. Dribble on your chest and smother you in the night. Melt when you smile and dissolve when you laugh.
Not understand why you think I’m rejecting you when I’m not rejecting you, wonder how you could think I’d ever reject you and wonder who you are but accept you anyway. And tell you about the tree angel enchanted forest girl, who flew across the ocean, because she loved you and write poems for you.
Wonder why you don’t believe me and have a feeling so deep.
I can’t find words for it. […]
I’m safe with you and tell you the worst of me, try to give you the best of me because you don’t deserve any less. Answer your questions when I’d rather not, tell you the truth when I really don’t want to and try to be honest because I know you prefer it.
And think it’s all over but hang on in for just ten more minutes before you throw me out of your life and forget who I am. Try to get closer to you because it’s beautiful learning to know you, speak German to you badly and Hebrew to you worse.
Make love with you at three in the morning and somehow, somehow, somehow communicate some of the overwhelming, undying, overpowering unconditional, all-encompassing, heart-enriching, mind-expanding, on-going, never-ending, love I have for you.
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