a place in this world

ind. abigail hobbs, canon divergent.

[bertinelli]

[lecter-nexus]

i’m sorry i couldn’t protect you in this life

[melisica]

(by Phil Chester)

[wordsnquotes]

Who’s the real you? The person who did something awful, or the one who’s horrified by the awful thing you did? Is one part of you allowed to forgive the other?

Rebecca Stead, Goodbye Stranger (via expionage)

[dresswelldobad-deactivated20171]

[aperiodofsoftness]

John Bozinov

[bunlly]

[omophagist]

The very air had screams smeared on it. He flinched from the noise in this silent room.

[aseaofquotes]

[aseaofquotes]

Stephen King, Night Shift

[katiazamolodchikova]

[facelesssnaps]

0012 by masyaka-kusyaka

[lifeinpoetry]

Bright splash of blood on the kitchen floor. Astonishing red. (All that brightness inside me?)

Laura Kasischke, from “View from glass door,” Space, in Chains (via lifeinpoetry)

[sepiol]

– now I’m gone. ┊ ❪ ind. elliot alderson, est 08/2015 ❫

[wordsnquotes]

People who like to be in control of things can have a hard time with intimacy. Intimacy is anarchic and mutual and definitionally incompatible with control. You seek to control things because you are afraid.

Jonathan Franzen  (via heidyofrp)

[arterycut-blog]

TAGGED BY: @eidetective TAGGING: @mainstreaming (you have to do it for ken too like darcy tagged u ok), @holloe and/or oh my god if orgot elise’s url?? @prgmtc there, wait do @envisas​ too, @tobeau, @defenestratio

PERSON THEY CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT : to get abstract: a sense of herself. abigail has always known who she is under the things she says and does, and i think if she lost that - if she became someone she truly didn’t recognise - it would be horrifying for her PERSON WHO NEVER FAILS TO MAKE THEM SMILE : i’d say @memoryserved​ is probably a likely candidate, simply because kennedy is - generally - pleasant to be around. it’s honestly very hard to make abigail unfailingly smile? particularly in s1 when she’s directly post trauma - no one can be that for her, no matter how hard they try PERSON THEY FEEL SAFE TO BE VULNERABLE AROUND : hannibal in season one - right through to mizumono. he manipulates her into it, which sucks. she’s gradually feeling safer with @eidetective which is nice i guess PERSON THEY WANT TO IMPRESS : any doctor, to be honest. anyone who’s got a say in how her life goes from now on. otherwise she doesn’t feel beholden to anyone. PERSON THEY WANT TO SPEND THEIR LIFE WITH : abigail really has never been able to think in permanent terms like this. she was too busy being a teenager and then too busy being an orphan. and now she’s too busy being a fugitive and trying to rebuild her life. PERSON THEY FEEL THEY NEED TO PROTECT : herself ! herself ! herself ! PERSON THEY ARE AFRAID TO BE REJECTED BY : i don’t think she fears rejection on a grand scale but she’s definitely, during s1, worried about hannibal (& to a much lesser extent, will) leaving her to her own devices. with will, she’s very afraid her crimes will outweigh any value she holds for him. PERSON THEY’D TAKE SHIT FROM & NOT MIND : it’s very early days but i have a feeling that @bloodiedwolf could get away with more than abigail would let on. otherwise there’s not really anyone. pre-series, i definitely think marissa was an abrasive kind of friend, and that abigail let her get away with absolute murder (haha). PERSON THEY WOULDN’T HESITATE TO KILL : nick boyle, apparently PERSON THEY NEVER EXPECTED TO LIKE BUT NOW LOVE : boy... there’s not really anyone who fills this position. maybe someday will can wiggle his way into her heart if he keeps trying PERSON THEY FEEL BETRAYED BY : will graham’s sick and rude ass in releves. her dad for doing this to her. hannibal after mizumono. PERSON THEY RESPECT BUT DO NOT LIKE : alana, initially. this changes, but at first all she really sees is the psychiatrist.  PERSON THEY FEEL LIKE THEY HAVE FAILED : her mom to an extent, marissa definitely. some guilt over all the other girls killed by her dad. and alana, after mizumono.

[saccharine-heart]

VEIL, a self portrait

[arterycut-blog]

as much as i want abigail to be happy ––– i want to write her making horrible horrible mistakes, too, but like - banal ones. things that won’t be traumatic but she’ll look back on and go yeesh. bad relationships (platonic or otherwise), making stupid investments, learning to drive & hitting someone else’s car ... just fuck ups. life.

[cruelonlytobekindarchived]

@arterycut (x)

“You can come over absolutely anytime you’d like. I’ll have a spare key made for you to hang onto. My home is yours, as it always has been, Abby.”

A hand brushes hair from Abigail’s forehead and smoothly, softly presses a kiss to cool skin carefully. It’s probably a stomach bug– a bad day, something throwing her off. Regardless, Alana knows. She has a lot of days like that, though mostly she just feels that incessant nausea that stretches on for miles and miles, an endless sea of remote tummy discomfort. There’s nothing worse, most of the time.

“Do you have any toast, and maybe seltzer, chere?”

[arterycut-blog]

     my home is your home. if there’s one thing that’s true, it’s that      abigail isn’t sure she’ll ever be able to make herself believe she’s      earned this from alana. she believes in it, as much as she can      believe in anything this good, but she’ll never believe she did a      single thing to earn it. abigail’s eyes close when alana kisses her      forehead. she tries to think what she’s got in her kitchen.

          ‘ –– I think toast, yeah. ’