As Deep As The Ocean

Do you take all of your own photos? No. For me, it's always a google image search. Let's use the internet to create a dialogue.

[asdeepastheocean]

I don't know why I keep getting adverts for labial pumps cause I've only googled that a few times now.

[asdeepastheocean]

My clit is made from butthole skin

[asdeepastheocean]

i need to be entered into a breeding programme for unwant-able but broody women

[asdeepastheocean]

If I were to look into your eyes too long would my body crumple into a never ending orgasm?

[asdeepastheocean]

Its a complete myth that you should have solid shits. 

You should expect to have diarrhea alway the time. Sloppy shits are normal and its corporate business that want to make you think otherwise so you buy the medicine and good-bacteria drinks.

No pain, no strain, juts flush it down the drain.

[asdeepastheocean]

they say she itched her vag off out of frustration . 

[asdeepastheocean]

MY PURSUIT OF COCK

[asdeepastheocean]

“It could have been something”, she said to herself, as she pack up the last of her belongings in the home she had hoped would be hers forever. There were good things here but her ineptitude, both mental and physical, staying was untenable. Her eggs were dying and she needed to find a cock with sperm to fertilise them before she could put down roots. 

No cock wanted to. Not even the tip.

She cradled her imagery baby daughter in her arms and prayed for balls.

[asdeepastheocean]

And as the wind changed she knew it was time for her to leave. Yet again, unfulfilled efforts to source a righteous cock meant she must flea, swim upstream in the pursuit of a slong.

The pursuit of cock. 

[asdeepastheocean]

She lived restlessly, never settling. 

She roamed the land, in a never ending search for cock. 

[asdeepastheocean]

She seems like butter wouldn’t melt but it melts all the way down her butt crack when she’s sucking massive dick. 

PS (Is there a sapphic tone to Matilda and Miss Honey’s dynamic?)

[asdeepastheocean]

I crouched down on the beach and peeled open my labia.

I lowered myself onto the sand and allowed the dry sand to stick and mould itself into my moist folds. 

I stood back up and walked by to my car unsure of what would happen next. Vienna schnitzel vagina.

[asdeepastheocean]

As I rip your scrote apart in my mind.

Happy Summer Solstice. 

[asdeepastheocean]

Top Hot Summer Advice - Great your Summer Fling early so you can ride em all summer long. Get the most of of them.

[asdeepastheocean]

Guys, in regards to my post above, I just want to all to know that it isn’t too late. There are a few weeks of summer left to reap the benefits of my advice. You’re welcome and have a safe summer.

[renderandpress]

Well, I have to say it - it’s September 4th so if your bod’s gone untouched, your boobs still yearning for a tugging and your vagina beating for a stuffing, you have blown your chances for your Summer fling. Your love juices have been wasted another year my friend becuase no one was lining up for what you were  selling. You cobb-webbed-vagina-ed frump.

[asdeepastheocean]

So, here is my annual advice for the third year running. I can’t stay it enough -  secure your summer fling early. Remember, up the butt reduces the risk of pregnancy only by 60%. Not everyone knows that the butt canal is connected to the ovaries so swimmers can get through. And thats also how has a baby I was delivered anally. 

[asdeepastheocean]

2020

Here we find ourselves. A fourth year running. We are clunge deep in summer. The 20th August 2020.

While you desperately used masturbation in place of a real banging, like a diabetic injects insulin into their obese folds, in the hope that ‘next year I’ll catch a dick…” Did you ever think that, for once, your deeply unattractive body and personality would not be the main handicap for you? That in addition to your blandness and fatness, there would be a pandemic. A pandemic that even makes perving impossible. The one sexual release you had, gone. 

People are dying, losing their jobs and living in isolation. And your untouched body becomes even more acutely distanced from vitality. 

This is a call to all of you Bloated Spinsters, when we can safely mingle again, forget a Summer fling. Think Winter, Spring and Autumn. Hunt for D with the hunger and lust of what you are - a ball of lard and skin, fizzing with loneliness and flesh thirst.

GO FORTH.

[asdeepastheocean]

2022

Five years on from my first posting, and here we are.

Frumps, I cant deny it. I couldn't post this last year, because I'd been been lying. This frump lost hope. I've been wearing a facemask just just on my face but labia - keeping it safe and away from any penetration.

The starvation for dick became more severe than ever. After blood tests by concerned doctors I was indeed diagnosed with hump-hunger - the only fix - some high quality dicking.

But this frump doesn't feel delicious and wantable, nutritious and fuckable and the pursuit of dick wasn't in reach. 2021 was not the summer of loving for me. I didn't have the verve the catch and ride a slong like Rosie O'Donoghue rides the buses.

and so here is 2022.

Frump Queen understands that a savage romp isn't likely for myself. I am that one-off lost cause. So please, little frumps. Grow your leg hair long and commence your lowering of expectations as you scroll through the murky dating apps to confirm and test run your summer shag. Don't worry - if its not what you want there will be another. But remember, no one enjoys drinking Rattlers Pear Cider alone with sunburn. So find your summer spring.

[asdeepastheocean]

https://www.wikihow.com/Be-Irresistible-to-Men#:~:text=One%20trick%20that%20guys%20find,He'll%20be%20hooked!

[asdeepastheocean]

I can’t deal with the admin of being a slut

[asdeepastheocean]

If gas lighting is farting under the covers I’m gonna do that to myself