goodash

[ashenogood]

caught Roe in the wild in maid outfit lol

(This is one of my friends' BJD dolls)

[ashenogood]

Every name bears a tragedy, every name brings desperation to the point of numbness.

Nothing but hopelessness for the Soviets.

Shostakovich said he felt pain ever thinking about Meyerhold, and that pain remains to this day, not fading, only growing stronger.

'More tragic than anything in Shakespeare.'

[ashenogood]

Farewell my friend, emperor of Tamrial, hero of Cyrodiil.

I didn't know it would hit this hard.......Oblivion got me cry again on a not so fine Monday night.

It had been an honor to serve you.

[ashenogood]

Oblivion you broke my heart on a fine Sunday afternoon😥

It's not the rain but my tear that soaked people of Cyrodiil.

It makes me even more sad because i thought Traven is going to betrayal us, i genuine rather have him betrayal me then die for the cause.

I don't want to be the arch mage this way :(((((((((

Traven you makes so sad :***(((((((((((

[ashenogood]

Hail Sithis.

[ashenogood]

I love been outed by outer worlds.

And I indeed am accessorising.

Also I like Zeb hehe

[ashenogood]

Recently started to work at a new place, is currently going through tough time, print a pic of DSCH to remind me to prevail............

Lifes hard man

[ashenogood]

After a certain age, every time I listen to Shosty's 5 I feel something new, deep and complex. Especially after read and is reading books about him. The more I know him, know his life from multiple perspectives, his image becomes more vivid for me. My admiration and obsession to him became less intense however deeper.

Especially when the third movement of five started while im reading the passages about his perspective in empathy, humanity and the burden and responsibility of living. They told me what's behind the music sheets, not just the story, the history but the standard, value and belief that shaped, guided and supported the man Shostakovich became.

When i read here:

The part where he quoted the orthodox chant 'O Lord, save thy people' I think i truly felt that emotion and power brought not by the rhythm of the music or the cultural resonance, but the meaning and spiritual struggle DS is actually going through, about how painful he feels not because of his own misfortune, but everything he had to witness everyday. It brought me to tears not because of how beautiful it is anymore but because of the pain, the depression, and hopelessness he felt. Yet he still prevailed.

Im not going to ramble about how much of a hero he is here because I already did many times lol. I just want to express how and what him a human today. And I want to share another piece that shows that other than his upbringing and personality, who inspired him to be the hope in difficult time:

[ashenogood]

I know a raver when I see one.

[ashenogood]

I love the modding community, vtmb just came out and there's already mods. Thank you hard working people, you're the true heroes

[ashenogood]

First time glad to be an adult with their own place that can be decorated.

I call this pic the Assembly of Russian headache composers. (Excuse Mahler's attendance maybe as a moderator. And DS is more troubled by headache than the others

[ashenogood]

The fact Techland brought Kyle Crane back from the dead just because the fans (i.e. Me) love him so much deserves to have me looking past all the less satisfactory elements of the game.

I don't care, I just want to have more time with Crane in 2025.

[ashenogood]

I recently started playing hogwarts legacy and my decision created a really funny, chaotic and devilish character. Following contents spoiler regarding Sebastian's quest line.

Like any other main character (MC), he's an absolutely loved boy who's the embodiment of sunshine, love and humanity. An ideal citizen who cares for his community and the well-being of his fellow humans. Dressing nicely, talking tenderly and behaving mannerly. Helping everyone as much as he can and doesn’t ask for anything in return.

But the way he acts and reacts to Sebastiano's 'drifting towards the darkness' (I like and think calling Sebastian this way is funny, and I would like to imagine this as his way of annoying Sebastian.) is very devilish. He is a complete enabler of Sebastiano's unforgiving behaviours. Think of one way but act the other. Tolerating and egging on Sebastiano's way for so little, not entirely high value personal gain (dark magic). Doesn't he need it? No, he's a Ravenclaw, and he knows enough spells to keep himself safe as well as perform justice.

The funniest and the most cruel moment to me is when Sebastian completely lost and killed his uncle with Avada Kedavra, stunned and scared out of his mind, trying to seek affirmation from MC to ease his guilt, and my boy's reaction is like 'Yeah yeah yeah you are absolutely right, you did what you have to do, I would do the same thing (which is a fucking lie), it's absolutely your uncle's fault, he left you with no choice. Now stfu and teach me the spell. (He says with a pleasant smile on his face)' Plus his expression is always smiling and shit, makes his looks even more evil and cruel. Not at all the model, righteous wizard as everyone saw and presumed he is.

My MC practices dark magic daily without any remorse or guilt consciousness, he definitely agrees with some aspects of Sebastiano's logic, but just the way he performs in front of other people compared to his way with Sebastian is so pretentious and disgusting to me. Especially in the later stage of Sebastiano's quest line, the attitude and power shift between him and Sebastian strengthens this canon even more. The desperation of Sebastian, the horror and panic of Ominis vs. the calm and borderline indifferent attitude from MC is so intense, makes my explanation seemingly the only logical way to understand the situation. (But i honesty think the emotionless and lack of response of MC is flaw in game design)

I would wish my very WORST enemy for a friend like this.

Anyway, I wasn't planning to indulge Sebastiano but once I decided a certain way, I tend to follow through for consistency reasons, and everything turns out to be very entertaining and somehow enriched the depth of my character. No regret, but definitely going to try a 100% lawful good line next time for Sebastiano's quest line.

[ashenogood]

Dare I say, that I personally enjoy Prokofiev's piano concertos more than Rachmaninov's.

[ashenogood]

I have been thinking about Shostakovich's 5 recently, and I would like to think it as a requiem as well. Not a specifically themed one, but i would like to believe S has the idea when he wrote it. Under the circumstances like that, it's very likely for him to think this might be his last piece, so when he's mourning the dead in 3rd mvt with traditional Russian hymn, he's praying for himself as well. He's using his last chance to speak for the people who are suffering, to speak of the pain and repression his people are under, the death of a great nation and a future that's gone.

That's why he's brave, he is a shy and anxious person but he's definitely no crowd. Even in his (presumed) last moment, he didn't give up fighting, didn’t give up protesting against cruelty and tyranny. His own existence will always be the last when the people, the society and the belief he loves and stands for are in the line.

He's one of the greatest people who have lived.

[ashenogood]

Any classical fan listened to Mahler while high? I imagine it would make you see above heaven, asses the truth of every existence.

[ashenogood]

Bruh how can I express my fondness for Stravinsky's Apollon musagète. I really think it's so much superior to any other ballet compositions. I even like the ballet itself because of the composition. (Im not a ballet lover, I'm an imbecile)

Stravinsky is the ballet god😩