Aizen: [in front of a broken tea maker] Who broke it?
Everyone: [silent]
Aizen: I’m not mad, I just want to know.
Starrk: …I did. I broke it–
Aizen: No. No, you didn’t. Grimmjow?
Grimmjow: Don’t look at ME. Look at Ulquiorra.
Ulquiorra: What? I didn’t break it.
Grimmjow: Huh, that’s weird. How’d you even know it was broken?
Ulquiorra: Because it’s sitting right in front of us and it’s broken.
Grimmjow: Suspicious.
Ulquiorra: No, it’s not!
Yammy: If it matters, probably not, but Szayelaporro was the last one to use it…
Szayelaporro: Liar! I don’t even drink that crap!
Yammy: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
Szayelaporro: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, YAMMY.
Starrk: No, no, let’s not fight. I broke it, Lord Aizen, let me pay for it.
Aizen: No! Who broke it?!
Nnoitora: …Lord Aizen? Halibel’s been awfully quiet.
Halibel: REALLY?!
Nnoitora: Yeah, REALLY!
Halibel: OH MY–
[later, as everyone’s fighting]
Aizen: I broke it. It burned my hand, so I punched it. I predict in ten minutes from now they’ll be at each other’s throats with war paint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.
